Thorfinn woke from a deep warm sleep to cries and whimpers something shifted in his arms bringing the fact he now held a very upset deeply sleeping Hermione, either he had pulled her to him in his sleep, or in her distress she had sought comfort in his sleeping form.
"Hermione shhh its just a dream your safe please wake up." He pleaded softly pulling her up with him he brushed the hair that was coming out of the braid away from her face. Her cries sounded terrible as if she was in extreme pain, it slowly dawned in his sleepy brain she must be dreaming of Bellatrix torturing her at Malfoy Manor.
"She's not here Hermione Please wake up she will never touch you again." He growled a bit louder holding her as tight as he dared to not want to hurt her, He felt a shiver go through her body and her hands lifted and set themselves on his shoulders. He pulled back a bit and in the dim light meeting her eyes , sighing a sigh of relief he watched her silently cry a bit more holding her to him trying to be as soft as he could. He was to much a hard man by every definition of the word he didn't know how he could get rid of her fears and allow her peace of mind.
"I'm s so sorry I didn't mean to wake you, I should have warned you about my nightmares before we went to bed so you could ignore me. I usually cast a silence charm so I don't bother anyone. Please you can let me go now it wasn't a bad one I've had worse. Thorfinn?" She stumbled and mumbled in a long drawn out sentence and confused when his eyes hardened and he remained silent.
"You will never face these dreams alone again you are not allowed to hid this from me. If you wake and have need of comfort you will wake me. Understood?" Thorfinn final growled out staring into her eyes and finishing softer with. " I will hold you as long as you are shaking, as long as my doing so bring you no distress." Hermione was confused why would he want to comfort her about her nightmares .
"You don't have to be bothered with my dreams they are just silly fears I'm used to ." She tried to start but the deep rumbling of Thorfinn chest under her small hand she had slid down to rest on his heart interrupted her.
"You are my wife Hermione I may not have earned your heart the traditional way but I will not abandon you to your deepest fears not while we share a bed not while I deem it important for you to have someone quell theses dreams. Didn't your Mother quell them when you were a child? I bet she did well as your Husband that is now my job and I take that quite seriously." The set of his firm jaw left it impossible for Hermione to argue with she was quite taken aback at his words .
She could remember waking as a child to her mother's hand brushing her hair back as Thorfinn was doing, it broke her resolve remembering another instance when she woke in the night after her second year at Hogwarts to use the WC. She had heard voices her mother hysterical she peeked in to her parents room, saw her father holding her mother, again as Thorfinn was now holding her, speaking softly saying she was safe over and over and it final clicked it had not been about her mother at all but about Hermione herself. She looked up into Thorfinn's icy blue eyes dark in the dim light, She leaned up and kissed him on the cheek right next to the corner of his lip it was soft and sweet .
"I thank you Thorfinn, I am indeed so lucky to have such a kind, warm, sweet Husband as you to care for me. Will you hold me the rest of the night it helps me sleep." Hermione said softly as she pulled back from the kiss.
"Of course." Was all that was said and she found herself laying across a large wholly male body muscles taught under her hand a small shudder struck her body as Thorfinn brought the blankets over them she lay her cheek on his shoulder it was almost as if the shoulder had been made to perfectly cradle her head. Before long her breathing had evened out again sprawled over Thorfinn. This girl was going to be his undoing to enticing and beautiful for her own good he was far to old for her no matter their status as married. Not that the wizarding world would blink at that he had a great aunt married at 16 to a 70 year old man, he was just as bad as that to him she must have been born sometime after his graduation she must be at least 17 but already aged by the war having been forced to fight due to her blood status.
At 37 he was already old enough to be her Father, only the longevity of wizarding blood that played in his favor in his late 30's he was in his prime. Turning slowly to cradle the witch in his arms the power she leached into him was heady and strange. Thorfinn tucked her securely to him as if his size alone could protect her from the evil he served, who was he kidding he was the evil he wanted to protect her from. He continued to lay as Hermione's soft breathing became a comforting soothing sound and he slipped back into sleep.
Hermione was the first to wake this time the light coming through a large bay window she blinked her eyes clearing and finding herself looking at a bare chest she blushed recalling waking Thorfinn with a nightmare, He had settled her fears held her gently easing her back to a better sleep.
Slipping his heavy arm from around her slowly so as not to wake the man she was able to slip out of the warm cocoon she tiptoed to the bathroom. Washing her face wishing she had her tooth brush and face cream fortunately the sink had a sweet smelling soap she used to freshen herself up, the outfit Astrid had given her appeared on the counter next to her clean and fresh. Silently blessing the elves thoughtfulness and making a mental note to thank Grun later she dressed herself then slowly unwound her hair from what was left of the lovely braid Astrid had put in her hair. A sharp knock on the door gave her a start.
"Yes!" She answered quickly.
"Hermione if you like I asked Grun to bring you a hair care set and dressing table for you to use. " Thorfinn replied she opened the door surprising him .
"You are a life saver I did't know what to do with this mess." She smiled and gestured to her hair that was forming into a large cloud around her head.
"Take your time it's your's now." He smiled motioning to a beautiful ornate ladies dressing table it was well taken care of she gasped at it.
"It's so beautiful I had always wanted one when I was a little girl." She walked up to the beautiful table upon it sat a beautiful silver hair set brush, comb, small handheld mirror some simple hair clips in the same silver. Reaching a hand out she lightly touched the set settled down on the cushioned seat she caught Thorfinn's reflection in the large mirror his shoulders relaxed blue eyes dancing with joy as he watched her . She couldn't help but watch him as she picked up the hair brush and started to sort out her wild mane his lips spread in a soft smile she was stunned when she saw the shift in his face one minute smiling and happy the next slammed into a cold hard look. He walked into the bathroom shutting the door behind him the poor man he kept so much inside he split himself in two different people but that meant he spent most of his time trapped in his Death Eater persona even around his mother.
Hermione stood not wanting to wait for the man who seemed to be going through something within his own head not wanting to add to his stress and to perhaps learn more about him she made her way to the breakfast table joining Astrid who smiled as she sat.
"Morning darling How did you sleep?" The blond asked in almost a sing song voice.
"Better then I have in a while, Thorfinn probably wont say the same after I woke him with my nightmares. But I did manage to catch a glimpse of the man under the charade he plays. I need more information though if we could take some time and talk a bit more . Also is there a library here?" Hermione address the older witch.
"Yes my dear we have a library. You'll be good for my son keep him guessing dear now lets get to work on the list of things you'll need while your with us. " Astrid laughed flicking her wand and summoning ink and parchment. They wrote down instructions for Thorfinn to give to the shops Hermione grew more and more concerned with the lists length .
7 Tee-shirts in a 12
4 pairs jeans in a 14 boot cut or strait leg
pj tops and bottoms same sizes as shirts and pants
Shoes runners traiers or converse in a 6
1 or 2 dresses in a 14
socks a dozen pairs
under things in an 14
Face cream
lotion
tooth brush
floss
feminine products
"That's to much Astrid I don't need all of that." Hermione protested.
" Dear one I know you are not use to relying on anyone outside of your family but you need these thing this is just the basics. Now when are you due for your menstrual cycle? And what size was the last bra you bought?" Astrid patiently asked.
"Um 36C but I have lost a bit of weight, And to be honest I have been so stressed with the war I haven't properly kept track of my cycle. I feel so awful I have never not kept track since I started." Hermione blushed.
"Dear you are not to blame most witches don't keep track, How would you normally prepare and what things do you use? You don't have to feel ashamed to talk to me about these women things you are My Daughter now I want you to come to me." Astrid said softly
"Usually I keep a fairly strict schedule I'd normally be at school I kept two schedule books, One for school work one for my cycle It was something my mother encouraged so it would not sneak up on me during my studies mother would send me pads and tampons. My stress has really done a site to my cycle during this war so I have no clue how it will act when I do get it I will probably be in pain. Since I am to be here I'm an apt brewer and I'd like to be able to keep up with my studies I'm amazing with theory alone for the most part. I don't just want to sit around like a pretty flower I want to be doing something to help with this war." Hermione smiled at the woman next to her Astrid scribbled down her bra size long with tampon's and pad's Hermione was stunned to see Astrid write down journal , leather note books, and ball point pens along with everything else.
" There I remember when I was a girl I preferred to use these for my notes and first essay drafts to be honest Parchment is expensive and I have the feeling these would serve you better then just rolls of parchment. Everyone wants to be free of this war dear, I wish there was another way but for at least now every time you see that horrid man you watch and wait, don't speak unless Thorfinn says to, just follow Thorfinn's direction and keep yourself safe." Astrid said lightly.
"And If I know of a way to bring him down?" Hermione asked lightly.
"Then you plan and wait we want out too but you don't trust us yet and that's fine you'r a prisoner after all. Learn everything you can about us and Him his movements and who he keep's close. If you can darling we will help but you must trust us completely first and that is going to take a while you don't seem like one who trusts easily." Astrid cemented.
"Ravenclaw, I'd bet Astrid." Hermione smiled at the older woman who chuckled.
"Indeed my dear I spend most of my time in the library myself it will be nice to have some company to bounce things off of. Well get you sorted there once Thorfinn goes on his shopping trip." Astrid laughed Thorfinn strode in after her comment blue eyes cold as he looked at his mother.
"I am ready to leave do you have the list?" Was all he said hand out Astrid raised one perfectly shaped eyebrow up and handed her son the list. He whirled around and left as quickly as he came.
"He's in a mood again it's best to let him alone when he's like this." Astrid sighed
"Have you ever considered the reason he resorts to these moods?" Hermione asked sipping the tea in front of her.
"To be honest I never really thought." Astrid pondered
"Most people in his position do one of two things Take Professor Snape for instance for all to see he seems like a undercover agent working for his namelessness now in reality the brilliant man was a double agent turned by love but to the world he was full of hate and bitterness he displayed those emotions like a armor, to drive people away . The second which is what I'm guessing Thorfinn is doing he's internalizing it in order to not show his insecurity's to everyone by showing he's cool and collected in a leave me alone don't fuck with me kind of way." Hermione nibbled at her breakfast hardly eating.
"Insecurity's hmmm that does make seance as a boy he always felt like he wasn't good enough to protect me from his father maybe he feels the same way about you right now He's afraid of letting you down feels like he's not good enough to protect you." Astrid looked stunned.
"It makes perfect sense honestly Inadequacy is one of the easiest mental hurdles to over come what we need to do is when he gets in these moods is to do something he'll like may it be food cake or just a hug thank you Showering him with affection and showing him we think he is good enough his mood swings should eventually go away it just takes time." Hermione smiled
"I take it you have already made this your mission here?" Astrid smiled and the witches shared a conspiratorial look and left the table to search for her place The Library.