My shoulders rise and fall, rise and fall. My lungs collapse and burn anew with full width. Eyes shake. Tears wet all around them... A thousand eyes stare back at me.
One sister steps ahead, her fists clenched and flexing. The crack of knuckles and jaw break the tension and no one is willing to intervene. My back straightens, my posture imitating the oncoming threat. She keeps coming, her dominant side throwing itself up to then send her sword away. Someone catches it, putting on the ground to the sound of skidding steel.
"You wore this...?" the stranger to me dares to ask, her century of experience as a Valkinvar-Imdvarce shining brighter than any of my grand-cycles as one. She tears off her helmet, throwing it into the stone without a care to either material. Stone cracks, steel dents. My eyes go left, then right.
The crowd is backing off, a vile eagerness entering some eyes, whereas others are neutral. Few are keeping any sense of high morality. My threat was quite explicit in turning people against me, even if its intentions were not to do so. Consequences for my actions. Consequences for them all...
Running from the war when I did. Losing my sacred virginity in the way that I did. Coming back to the war the way I did. Putting on Sister Ogawa's armour at the moment I did...
"I did." I answer, my voice finding some firmness to it with how my secrets are laid bare. Now everyone knows. Everyone in this barracks knows. Some will put it into diaries, others will simply remember it until they don't. Others will talk. There's not much else to do these days in the war against the heretics.
The walls are seeing no siege. The battlements fearing no guns. Big and small, crafty and blunt. There is nothing to do, and more and more are we being packed into this city. All any of us can do is go around, looking for others to talk to.
All of Thurn's Forge will soon learn of my secrets. Of the cowardly, runaway Valkinvar who dared to come back to the war. A woman who lost her most sacred of treasures in her moment of greatest defeat. A Valkinvar who abandoned her post as her home lost itself to heresy and its legions.
"I wore her armour when I had no other steel to protect me." I reiterate, holding my spine as straight as it can be. Shoulders wide with confidence and ability, even as I keep my eyes against someone still in her armour. She steps once more, then again and again. She stops within arm's reach, but not close enough to drive a proper blow without moving into it.
Was she the one who struck me earlier...? My memory is not right, right now. I can't get my thoughts off of Ogawa and her body. Her empty armour and the mess it is making on and around my bed. The problems it brought with me when I came home should not be her now.
"It was not yours..." the unknown sister hisses, her fists trembling with such an eager want. My eyes drop down, staring at them intimately as their silent dare continues to scream for me. I look back to her eyes, matching them as they narrow away.
"She was dead, and I was alive." I point out, not really appreciating the sentimentality at a moment like this. If it ever crossed my thoughts back then, it certainly didn't stop me. I took that desecrated steel and I gave it redemption. I wore it in my fight against an airship we brought down!
An entire war-witch chapter and their mobile fortress pet splattered their blood over it. The steel protected me in life where it was wasting away in her death. I didn't just loot it, either, I buried her as well as I could. I gave her what honour I could even after the heretics denied her right to it!
"SISTER OGAWA WAS MY FRIEND! AND SHE DIED HOLDING THE POST YOU RAN AWAY FROM!" this so-called friend roars, her own eyes glinting with long denied tears.
"GIANT'S VICTORY FELL REGARDLESS AND I DID NOT ABANDON MY PO-" I roar back, her fist colliding with my already wounded eye. A wave of worry washes through the others, murmuring its way to something vicious. Childish, even. Fight. Fight. Fight!
I recover from the blow, swinging my head up alongside my fist. It collides with her chin, smashing up the steel and evicting some air from her lungs. She snaps back instantly, fire burning both of our eyes black. We crash against each other. The air ripping itself apart into two vapour flashes.
Sonic booms.
The ceiling comes close, as if it's nothing more than a wall. I bash her into it, letting it rain flakes of redstone and mosaic. She shoves me back into the air, launching for my gut. I howl in pain. Her blow tormenting what the osibindah dead left for me since that horrid incident in my past. The ground shatters around me, one of her hands finding my neck.
She cocks her free gauntlet and smashes away. Insults and despair flying out of her. Rich with memories of Ogawa I will never understand. My hands clap for her face, and grip tight.
Thumbs find her eyes, and I squeeze, magic lighting up the edges of their nails. She screams, recoiling away just enough for me to throw her off. The rubble flies with us and I strike her in the air. She recovers without ever hitting another surface.
We collide again and again. Rupturing the air and disturbing the peace all around. I grab her, she grabs me. Her years over me force me back and into a spin. Cycles of work in stained-glass shatter around me, freeing me to what is left of today. A snarl bares my teeth and I clash back to her. Forcing us back inside towards the crowd, a new one finding their way to us.
Everyone's voices are a blur. Though they're all soldiers of the highest order. Although we are both soldiers. No one is willing to get involved.
Whatever their reasons, it doesn't matter. I need to keep going. I will not be shamed and bullied for staying alive. I will not bear someone's guilt over their dead friend because of circumstance. I will not!
Her fist hits my jaw, spiralling me across the air as her rage bursts through her lips. She throws herself at me, one hand going too close to her sword for comfort. My thoughts get the better of me, all but ensuring my perspective. My sword arm's rune glows, calling my blade to me.
"DON'T-" clearly screams through the dozens of voices. We ignore them all. My sword enters my hand, and hers does the same. A single noise rings out, silencing the world.
Steel-on-steel.
The moment slides away, sparking as our fine edges chip away. Our feet find footing and the ground quakes, splitting, shaking, and cracking. Valkinvar against Valkinvar. A duel of two fine witches, greater than so many others.
She slips away and I do the same, coming back around with another swing. Blade meets blade, bashing each other away again. Again. Again. Again!
I find an opening and thrust ahead, sliding down the length of her sword. She hoists her guard up, flinching away even with her armour. My breasts are bare and she has armour. She still hides even now!?
"MAYBE I SHOULD'VE LEFT OGAWA IN THAT RUINED TEMPLE! MAYBE I SHOULD'VE LEFT HER DESCRATED AND UNBURIED! I CLEARLY NEVER NEEDED HER ARMOUR!" I roar, not thinking about anything than hurting this sister. She howls back at me, animalistically swinging for me and my flesh. I dash around the barracks, blasting apart more beds and knocking into several more sisters.
A stampede of orders, demands, and wishes come from them all. Our fighting space grows and my opponent rampages towards me. She hooks her blade into the ground, dragging it along with her at Mach speed. Sparks and dust fly up for me and I luck out. Steel rings again and I go away, wincing the mess away as my tears match hers as well.
"SHE NEVER HAD TO DIE IF YOU NEVER ABANDONED YOUR POST! TRAITOR! TRAITOR! TRAITOR!" she roars away, smashing her sword down and across for me however she can. I block and weave, not eager to find my blood on that thin, dangerous line. She tries her damndest regardless of my wishes, hoping to chop me apart.
I step forward, blocking her next blow before its momentum can build. I push into her, freeing one hand to return her earlier favour. It collides against her skull, sending her into a reel. She spins away, and I throw out another punch. She headbutts the blow, forcing it to an abrupt halt.
I dash away, sliding through even more snapping beds and tearing mattresses. My shoulders roll, getting the springs off of and I leap into a slash. I spin overhead, slicing the wind and her shadow. She thrusts right into me, knee-first and blade too far for a proper blow.
"OGAWA DIED WHILE SOMEONE LIKE YOU LIVED!? HOW DARE YOU! HOW DARE YOU EVER SHOW YOUR FACE HERE AGAIN!" she screams, knocking aside my blade and forcing me to wrestle with hers. She keeps the guidance rune active, letting it glow away just to keep her blade in hand. Her other hand keeps my fist closed, stopping the rune from unfurling.
I smash my head against hers, and she does the same. A moment breaks into view and I leap into flight just to kick her away. My blade slams into my grip and I spin with the momentum. I swing it down, right for her head. The flat of the her sword meets the edge of mine, rupturing the wind.
She heaves for the sky, sending me to it. She gives chase, our blades meeting ahead of time. They rattle and sing more and more, the barracks grounds shaking with elderly dust. The cloud grows and we smash away, getting in what blows we can.
"I'M ALIVE, ABLE TO FIGHT AND DEFEND MY HOME! I FACED PRINCE JHRARTUR AND LIVED! I LOST MY SACRED RITE TO AN AFTERLIFE TO THE OSIBINDAH! AND HERE I AM! STILL FIGHTING LONG AFTER SHE DIED! SHE DID NOT DIE BECAUSE OF ME! SHE DIED BECAUSE OF HERSELF!" I snap back, letting the silent moment carry on as our blades heave away in the air. No blood on the edge of either yet. A groan fills my mouth, bubbling away with slight bits of blood her blows have managed to get out of me.
It's no lie to admit I am the weakest fighter. The weakest of all the Valkinvar-Imdvarce, let alone all of the Valkinvar. All my extra grand-cycles of war mean nothing. Everyone here has had as much and more time to grow in power. I will lose this fight if it does not end.
"I don't care... I don't care about you... IF I COULD SPILL YOUR BLOOD AND BRING BACK OGAWA THEN I WOULD!" she howls, the nameless face charging me once again. Nothing but a berserker's fury driving her actions ever onward. Our blades meet, setting mine aside and sending me into a reel. She thrusts forward, nipping the edges of my gut.
The air bursts apart, sending me to safety. Stone catches me against its unyielding embrace and I head out again. I fake my swing and slide around her overreach, hammering my next blow around. It strikes her back, reeling her posture straight and lungs empty. She snaps, teeth clenching to the breaking point.
Her fist meets me, thrusting me against the ground. Steel rattles and she kicks my sword away. Her knees collapse on my arms, pinning them as her magic viciously lashes out at me. I call on what I can, trying to overpower her. But to no avail.
Her hands lock around my neck and press for my windpipe. The flow of oxygen cuts off, only dampening my magic income, too. I choke away, desperately trying to free at least one hand again. Her sobbing eyes continue to tremble as I defy her want for me to beg. I will not beg. I will not beg.
I did not survive all this time to fall to a petty brawl... I did not!