As I read the letter again and again, I forget to breath, I forget to blink. I look up to find my dad looking at me with curious eyes.
"He's divorcing me." I tell them in a plain voice. He doesn't want me back. He doesn't want to spend his life with me. He doesn't love me. I laugh at the thought of getting everything back to normal. It can never be the same. Dan was right. He wanted to destroy us and he did. Nathan wouldn't trust a girl who didn't even give him a chance to explain his side of the story. Why did I do that? Why do I always presume the worst of him? Well, no use finding the answers to these questions anymore because he wants nothing to do with me. He is finally free. He can go ahead and find his soulmate and live happily ever after.
My stomach flutters and beany reminds me of his existence. Tears brim my eyes as I think about the relation beany could have had with Nathan. But beany doesn't exist for him. I close my eyes and think about the happy memories I imagined while being tied to that chair. Those were non-existant, just like his love for me.
"April," my mom calls out softly, "Honey, he's only doing this because he thinks you want nothing to do with him."
"Or he's doing that because he finally wants to be free from this marriage, this drama that you guys have put us in where we have become puppets of Robin."
"Honey, don't say that. Robin cares about you two. He might not be able to show it like we can but he really does. When you got kidnapped he called all the stops. He put everything in his power to find you." My dad jumps in.
"Well it doesn't matter now, does it? Nathan doesn't want me to be part of his family..."
"You need to tell him about your child. He will come around."
"Why? So that I can tie him down with another responsibility? Another burden?"
"It's not like that. He will never see you two as a burden. He will love the both of you so much."
"Listen, I know you guys want to help but the best thing if you leave me alone please." I turn my back to them and let sleep consume me.
_______________________
Nathan's POV
"So you are really leaving?" Zayn questions my decision one last time as I keep the last of my bags in the trunk of the car. My boys are standing in the porch trying their best to stop me.
"I'm afraid so." I give them a small smile, "Like I said, the Paris office needs to be monitored and they will bring a CEO for LA office anyway. But you guys can come visit me, it's not like you are banned in France."
"I wish you were banned in France." Kyle rolls his eyes at me and I laugh.
"Can I ask you guys for a favour?" I ask them as I close the trunk.
"Yes, anything." They say together.
"April's parents hate me so they never let me inquire about her health, nor do they let me stay with her. Could you guys visit her in the hospital and check on her from time to time? From what I could gather, she needs complete bed rest for a month. This has been really hard couple of days for her, I don't know how she will cope with them."
"Then why are you leaving, you dumbfuck idiot?!" Jason almost yells at me, "Choose her! Choose her over this escape! She needs you. You love her."
"Of course I love her." I admit it without hesitation. I realised a couple of months ago that I have never loved someone like I love her and yet I never even got a chance to tell her, "But after all that has happened to her because of me, I have to let her go. She lost the baby because of me." I bite my inner cheek to control my emotions, "I cannot cause her more pain. All I hope is she finds someone who deserves her and give her everything I couldn't." I look away in distance thinking about everything I wanted to give her. I wanted to marry her again, properly. Dan may have been caught but he really took everything from me.
"Nathan!" We hear David call me as he runs towards the car, "You are leaving? And you didn't even tell me?" I could hear the hurt and anger in his voice.
"No David. It's not like that, I was going to stop by the office on my way to the airport." I explain.
"Why didn't you tell me?" He asks again.
"I'm sorry, David but I knew you would try to change my mind. I just want you to stay here and deal with everything in my absence. I also want you take care of the divorce formalities, give April whatever she wants."
"Divorce?! But I thought..."
"No, I'm afraid it's not working out." I tell him without getting into much details, "I'll be in touch with you, David. Thank you for coming here, you have saved me a trip." I give everyone a hug and get into the car. I turn back one last time to soak it all in. All that has happened in the last year. I think about April and the life we could have had with our child. Shaking my head, I tell the driver to take me to the airport.
__________________
April's POV
I do not wake up the next morning. When the nurse comes in the breakfast I pretend to be deep in sleep. When the doctor comes in to check on me, I pretend to be asleep.
"Is she okay?" My mom asks the doctor.
"Yes, Mrs Grey everything seems fine. Actually, April has made remarkable progress. Her vitals are great, the baby is doing much better, maybe we can discuss discharge by tomorrow." He says enthusiastically.
"But she has been asleep all morning."
"That's okay. In fact, it's better since she needs the rest. No harm in sleeping. However, I do understand the mental toll everything has taken on her and I have asked Dr Sarah from the psychology department to schedule a visit. She will be here in the afternoon."
"Okay." My mom says and kisses me on the forehead. Suddenly the door swings open and I hear someone panting at a distance.
"David?" My mom says in surprise.
"I....April....Nathan..." He tries to form a sentence between his heavy breathing.
"What happened?"
Curious, I too open my eyes. I move up to face him. David is trying to catch his breath. "April..." David rushes towards me, "He's leaving. He's leaving forever."
"What?" I try to comprehend what he's saying. What is Nathan doing? Why is he running away?
"You need to stop him. He thinks that he's lost you everything and maybe he has, but please. I beg you April, don't let him go."
"David, if this is what he wants, we are no-one to stop him." My dad says from behind.
I switch my gaze from David to my dad. Am I a nobody? Yes I am. He has signed the divorce papers, cutting me from his life once and for all. How do I stop him from leaving now?
"April, please, have it in your heart to forgive him. I know you lost your baby because of Dan but why are you punishing Nathan for it. He's hurting as much as you are. He's a very pure hearted person. Please..." David curls his palms into fists trying to control his emotions and convince me to stop his boss. I look at the divorce papers and then at the letter he wrote me. 'Yours, Nathan.'
The words run in my mind constantly. If he has in fact given up on us, why does this letter say that?
"David, I understand where you are coming from but my daughter has been told to take no stress at all. I request you to please leave." My dad jumps on again. David keeping looking at me with pleading eyes. I don't know what to do. Unconsciously, my hand reaches my stomch. Beany...Beany deserves a father, even if his father doesn't love his mother. Even if we cannot be together. Beany deserves to know both his/ her parents. I notice David slump his shoulders, ready to give up. He turns around to leave.
"Wait!" I hear myself calling after David. I sit up and climb out of the bed.
"April!" my mother grabs me, afraid I'll lose my balance. But the only thing I am about to lose is my sanity, if I don't stop Nathan today and tell me about Beany.
"David, take me to the airport. I need to see him once before he leaves." I see David's face light up, "Mom! Do not dare to stop me. You have done enough to ruin this relationship. I will take it from here." My mother tries to speak but I cut her off, "I feel fine. Do not stop me, mother." My mom exchanges a worried glance with my dad, but then finally gives me a nod. I see David bring in a wheelchair. I sit on the chair, without any arguments.
"But April, the discharge..." David points out.
"I will take care of it." I hear my dad say from behind, "The doctor was very enthusiatic about her recovery, I'm sure he will discharge her."
David gets me to the airport in record speed. All through the ride I have been imagining conversations with him, how I will tell him about beany but now that I am standing at the departures gate of the airport, I don't know what to do. My mind is completely blank. Was this a good idea?
"April!" David snaps me out of my thoughts, "Come on, let's go. He must be at the private jet take off gate." David rushes me out of the car. There are a million thoughts running through my mind as I stumble throught the airport. There is a pit in my stomach. For the first time ever, I am nervous to see him. Nervous to face him. For a second, I stop. Should I even be doing this? He is trying to move on from this nightmare. Should I stop him? Should I place this huge responsibiliy on him?
"April? Is that you?" I hear someone call my name from behind. I turn to find Vanessa standing a few meters away, along with Ethan. She rushes towards me and hugs me tightly, "Oh my God, look at you. Sweetie, I have been so worried about you and I am so glad you are okay. What are you doing here? You should be resting." She notices David behind me and her eyebrows furrow in confusion.
"I..." I try to tell her why I came here but I am not able to recollect the reason. I came here to stop him. To ask him if he wants to be with me. But I am afraid to know the answer. I don't think I can bear if he refuses me.
"We came to stop Nathan!" David answers on my behalf, sticking to the old agenda, "Where is he?"
"Stop Nathan?" Vanessa is shocked, "But...but he has alread boarded the flight. April, did you want to talk to him? I thought you never wanted to see his face after you lost..." she trails off. I just stand there, unable to say anything. He has boarded the flight, he's leaving. Its now or never.
"Yes, I want to see him. I have to talk to him." I finally say to her, "Please, Vanessa, I have to see him." Vanessa nods and quickly takes out her phone and dials Nathan. After a few rings, Nathan picks up.
"Missing me already?" He says before I have the chance to tell him its me.
"Nathan, come back!" Those are the only words I could form.
"April?" I could hear the surprise in his voice, "April, what happened? Are you okay? Where are you?"
"Come back."
"I..."
He tries to say something but is cut off by the air hostess, "I'm sorry Mr. Walsh, we are about to take off, you need to switch off your phone."
"I'm sorry, I gotta go." and with that the cell phone line gets disconnected.