Kyrah's heart was beating out of her chest.
Seojun had just confessed his love to her.
Not in a vague, ambiguous way that left her wondering what he meant. Not through little gestures she could spend hours analyzing with Linda. He had looked into her eyes and told her plainly that he loved her, that he knew about her past, that he understood she was carrying another man's child, and that he wanted to be there for both her and Peppa.
He had chosen her.
And now, standing beneath the Hong Kong night sky, Kyrah was struggling to remember how to breathe.
Her heart was beating so hard that she could feel it in her throat.
For months, she had been noticing Seojun in ways she hadn't allowed herself to examine too closely. His hands, especially. She loved how they looked when he held a coffee cup, how they moved when he explained something about work, and how careful they became whenever he helped her stand or offered his arm while they walked.
She remembered those same hands holding hers tonight, reassuring her that he loved her and that Peppa was included in that love.
How was she supposed to remain composed after that?
She couldn't.
Not anymore.
She loved him.
She had loved him for longer than she wanted to admit.
Perhaps it had started when he brought her coffee without making a fuss about it. Perhaps it had grown when he began asking about Peppa as naturally as he asked about her. Perhaps it had happened during one of those ordinary afternoons when he listened to her talk about work and made her feel as though her thoughts mattered.
Or perhaps she had been falling in love with him little by little, and only now, with his feelings finally laid bare before her, had everything she had been suppressing come rushing to the surface.
Kyrah looked at him.
Seojun was watching her patiently.
He wasn't trying to fill the silence. He wasn't demanding that she answer him. He had given her his heart and was allowing her the freedom to decide what to do with it.
That was what finally broke her.
Her eyes filled with tears.
"Seojun..."
He immediately stepped closer.
"Kyrah?"
She shook her head, trying to speak, but the words refused to come.
He reached for her hands.
"Hey. It's okay."
That only made her cry harder.
He looked alarmed for a moment, then gently rubbed his thumbs over her knuckles.
"Did I say something wrong?"
She shook her head quickly.
"No."
"Then tell me what's happening."
"I don't know!"
The words came out between a laugh and a sob.
Seojun blinked.
Kyrah covered her face.
"I don't know why I'm crying so much." I'm happy.
He let out a small, relieved breath.
"Then you don't have to know."
She lowered her hands.
He was smiling at her with such tenderness that another tear slipped down her cheek.
"How can you be so nice to me?" she whispered.
His expression changed.
"Kyrah..."
"No, you don't understand." She shook her head, trying to gather herself. "You keep doing this. You keep saying the nicest things, and you keep making me feel things I don't know what to do with."
He held her hands more firmly, without hurting her.
"Then we can figure them out together."
She looked at him through her tears.
"I love you."
The words escaped before she could overthink them.
Seojun went completely still.
Kyrah stared at him, suddenly overwhelmed by what she had just said.
"I love you," she repeated, her voice breaking. "I do. I really do."
His lips parted, but for a moment, no words came.
She gave a shaky laugh.
"Oh, God. Now I'm crying even more."
Seojun's eyes glistened.
"Kyrah, look at me."
She tried.
He lifted one hand and gently wiped a tear from her cheek.
"You love me?"
She nodded, crying harder.
"Yes!"
A smile spread across his face, so open and unguarded that she had never seen anything quite like it.
He looked almost disbelieving.
"You have no idea how long I've wanted to hear you say that."
Kyrah laughed through her tears.
"I know, and I'm sorry."
"Don't apologize."
"But—"
"No." He shook his head gently. "You don't have to apologize for taking your time. You don't owe me an answer just because I told you how I feel."
She stared at him.
"I know."
"And I don't want you to say you love me because you think you have to reward me for being good to you."
Her face softened.
"That's not why."
"I know. I just need you to understand that."
He brought both her hands between his.
"I love you because I love you, Kyrah. Not because I expect you to give me something in return."
She bit her lip, fighting another wave of emotion.
"I know you do."
"And you don't have to prove anything to me. not with anything you've been through."
She began crying again.
Seojun smiled sadly.
"You're going to make me cry too."
"Then cry!" she managed to say.
He laughed, and she laughed with him, both of them standing there with wet eyes and trembling smiles.
Then her expression changed.
She looked down at their joined hands.
"But I don't know if I'm ready."
The words came out so softly that he almost missed them.
Seojun's smile faded, but not with disappointment.
He waited.
Kyrah drew a shaky breath.
"I want this. I want you. I want to be with you, and I want to see where this takes us. But sometimes I get scared. I think about everything that happened before, and I wonder if I'm going to be able to do this without being afraid."
She looked up at him.
"What if I get scared and pull away? What if I overthink something you say? What if I need more reassurance than you expect? What if there are days when I don't know how to trust what I have because I'm still learning that I can have something good?"
Seojun listened to every word.
He didn't interrupt.
He gently lifted her hands and pressed a kiss to her fingers.
"Then we'll take it one day at a time."
Kyrah stared at him.
"You make it sound so easy."
"It's not going to be easy every day."
His honesty caught her attention.
"There will be days when we'll misunderstand each other. There will be days when one of us is tired, or worried, or doesn't know how to explain what's going on inside our head."
He smiled gently.
"But we can talk. We can learn each other. We can make mistakes and apologize. We can figure out what works for us."
Her lower lip trembled.
"And if I get scared?"
"Tell me."
"What if I need time?"
"I'll give you time."
"What if I need reassurance?"
"Then I'll reassure you."
She looked at him, searching his face.
"And if I don't know what I need?"
Seojun squeezed her hands.
"Then we'll figure that out too."
Her tears fell freely now.
He took a breath, and his own voice became softer.
"Kyrah, I've been waiting."
She looked at him.
"I've been waiting for you to feel safe enough to let me love you. I've been waiting for you to see that I'm not here because I feel sorry for you, and I'm not here because I think you need someone to rescue you."
He brushed another tear from her cheek.
"I'm here because I want you. Because I love the woman you are. Because I admire you. Because being part of your life makes me happy."
He paused.
"And because I want to know the little boy who already has such a big place in your heart."
Kyrah pressed a hand to her mouth.
Seojun smiled through his own tears.
"So if you're telling me you love me but you're not sure you're ready for everything that comes with being in a relationship, that's okay."
He held her hands a little tighter.
"I've been waiting, Kyrah. I can wait some more."
She broke.
Not in the way she had broken after Jinyoung abandoned her, when the pain had left her feeling unwanted and ashamed.
This was different.
This was the kind of crying that came when a heart that had spent too long protecting itself finally encountered something it desperately wanted but had been afraid to believe it could have.
Seojun stepped closer.
"Just trust me," he whispered. "Not because I promise I'll never make a mistake. I'm human, and I probably will. But trust me enough to talk to me. Trust me enough to let me show you who I am, even on the days when you're afraid."
Kyrah shook her head, tears streaming down her face.
"How am I supposed to do this?"
"With me."
He smiled.
"You're not doing it alone."
That was all she needed.
Kyrah stepped into his arms and hugged him.
She held him as tightly as her pregnancy allowed, pressing her face against his chest as the tears continued to fall.
Seojun wrapped his arms around her carefully, one hand resting against her upper back while the other cradled the back of her head.
He didn't tell her to stop crying.
He didn't rush her.
He simply held her.
And Kyrah allowed herself to be held without feeling that she had to earn the comfort.
She clutched the front of his jacket.
"I must've prayed and cried to God so hard all those nights," she whispered, her voice muffled against his chest, "so I got to have you."
Seojun stopped breathing for a moment.
Her words went straight through him.
Kyrah pulled back just enough to look at him, her face wet and her cheeks flushed.
Seojun's eyes filled completely.
"Kyrah..."
"I know I still have things to work through," she continued. "I know I'm not going to wake up tomorrow and suddenly forget everything that hurt me. But I want to try. I want to try with you."
He touched her cheek.
"That's all I could ever ask for."
She gave a watery laugh.
"You're going to make me cry again."
"Then I'll stay here until you're done."
She looked at him, her heart overflowing.
"You really are my boyfriend now."
His face broke into the widest smile.
"I am?"
She nodded.
"Yes."
He laughed, almost breathless with happiness.
"Can I kiss you?"
Kyrah stared at him.
After everything he had just said, after the way he had held her and promised to be patient, that question nearly undid her all over again.
She smiled through her tears.
"Seojun, if you ask me one more question, I'm going to start crying again."
He laughed.
"That isn't an answer."
She rose onto her toes and looped her arms around his neck.
"Then stop talking."
And she kissed him.
For a moment, Seojun seemed too stunned to react. Then his arms settled around her, and he returned the kiss with all the tenderness he had been holding back.
Kyrah felt the warmth of his hands at her back, the careful way he held her, and the unmistakable happiness in the little laugh that escaped him when she drew closer.
She had imagined kissing him before.
She would never admit how many times.
But none of those imagined moments compared to this one, because this time she wasn't wondering whether he wanted her.
She knew.
And he knew she wanted him too.
When they finally parted, Seojun rested his forehead against hers.
His eyes were shining.
"Hi, girlfriend."
Kyrah laughed.
"Hi, boyfriend."
He kissed her forehead.
Then her cheek.
Then he stopped himself and smiled.
"Sorry."
She narrowed her eyes playfully.
"For what?"
"I might be a little excited."
"A little?"
He laughed.
"All right. Very excited."
She rested her head against his chest again.
"Good. You should be."
He hugged her closer, careful of her belly.
And for a little while, neither of them said anything.
They didn't need to.