There was an unusually quiet morning the morning after the battle.
No broth zombies stumbled through the corridors. There were no midnight rebellions by any cursed cutlery.
Even the haunted armor suits had gone back to their posts, though Theo occasionally caught them in the armory after dark playing secret poker games.
This time, per royal decree, Evangeline sat in her highchair and sucked a brand-new pacifier infused with mild chili.
Duke Cassian looked at his breakfast suspiciously across from her.
"It tastes like eggs," he said in a whisper. "But how can we be sure?"
Whiskerton jumped up on the table, took a smell of the duke's plate, and then immediately knocked it to the ground.
"Now we're sure," the duchess deadpanned.
The remaining broth cultists gathered around a dying campfire deep in the forest.
Without Gerard's leadership, and more importantly, without his soup recipes their revolution had turned into petty bickering.
"I say we poison the castle's water supply," hissed one.
"With what?" snapped another. "Our last batch turned into mint jelly!"
A twig snapped.
When the cultists turned, they saw Aunt Seraphina leaning against a tree and slowly sharpening her cutlass.
"Boys," she sighed. "Let me teach you about career changes."
The occurring clatter of surrendered ladles could be heard from the castle.
The young mage stared at his reflection or rather, at the single noodle strand that had regrown overnight.
It waved cheerfully.
"No," Dante pleaded.
The noodle spelled out.
"2 CUTE 2 QUIT."
Lucien, passing by with an armful of anti-noodle talismans, paused.
"On the bright side, it has better handwriting than you."
That night, Evangeline's mark throbbed as she slept.
Visions flashed.
A shadowy fleet sailing on black broth tides.
Selphina, standing at the prow of a ship, the Jewel of Umami cracking in her grip.
The sound of a whisper. "The Child of Moon and Shadow must choose, flavor or fury?"
She woke up in tears.
Whiskerton licked her forehead once, solemnly.
"Rest, small human. The real war hasn't begun yet."
...
Chairman Meow's latest video. "How to Train Your Human: Advanced Obedience" has gone viral.
Sister stared at her phone in horror.
"He's charging for seminars now?"
The cat in question lay around above her EX' ACT lightstick collection, tail flicking as he monitored his cryptocurrency investments, which were all tuna-backed, naturally.
Somewhere, a doorbell rang. Sister opened it to find a dozen feral cats bearing "Union Demands" scrolls.
"MREOW," said their lawyer.