[Wednesday]
(While on the way back to home from school hayoka suddenly remember cooking ingredients isn't enough and so he decided to go do groceries just when himori wanted to go with hayoka too)
(They both arrived at the super market not long after, when they're in the super market Himori doesn't seems like her usual self, she's much quieter and been looking around Hayoka look at where she was looking at, it was some paper stick to the wall with word written saying is hiring worker also how much monthly salary you would get and the description of it saying what kind of job is it and what you need to do)
(Hayoka smile looking at Himori and pat her head)
Hayoka: Is okay, you should focus on your studies and life now, I still can manage but if you want to work I could company with you to apply for job, I'm with you
(Himori smiled at nod after hearing what her brother said, she felt relieved then saved the phone number and continue shopping grocery with her brother)
(As they were done with groceries later on, they carried a few bags of groceries going back home, while they were crossing the road hayoka clear his other hand, holding all the bags his carrying to the other hand then hold his little sister hand)
(Everytime Himori saw cars she can't help but to feel anxious, stressed and lots more mixed negative feelings making her unable to move and just can't help but standing there until her brother hold her hand and help her to cross the road together with her, Himori would finally have the courage to cross the road with Hayoka)
(Himori walk along Hayoka closely, the moment felt warm, comforting and relaxing just being by his side, it felt even stronger when she sticking close to him)
(After Himori and Hayoka crossed the road safely, they are still holding hand not realising until they walk on the together just then they both let go of their hand, their face is obviously slightly red on their cheeks)
(After couple of hours later, Hayoka and Himori finally returned back home)
Himori: Ow my hand hurting from carrying the bags for sooo looong
Hayoka: You can go to rest first, I'll go put the groceries
(Hayoka smile and pat her little sister head before going to put groceries)
(Himori saw his brother already going to put the groceries, she smiled and went to help her brother also smiled)
{Hayoka: Himori has grown alot recently, is good to see this, I'm sure if mom and dad sees her growth they would be happy and proud, just like I am now)
(Hayoka pat Himori making her couldn't stop smiling)
[11:06 AM | Wednesday]
(Himori and Hayoka is currently on their room bed laying ready to sleep but Himori couldn't sleep, when ever she close her eyes she would relax and remember the past, the guilt is always there bugging her, no matter what she thinks of the past no matter what others or that she told herself is fine, she couldn't let go because she always thinks she is the reason why her parents died just because she keep persistently telling her parents to bring her to amusement park to play even when her parents is tired, she always blame herself and not being the playful self she was and so she always told herself to become mature)
(Himori isn't really a mature person she just been trying to be mature to her brother and playful in front of her friend but inside of her, she wanted to be protected she felt insecure since her parents passed away and so her true playful self of her are hidden deep inside, she doesn't want to lose anybody else anymore because of her)
(She wore her pajamas when is her bed time, himori hugged herself tight on her bed, as time passes she decided to find Hayoka for... perhaps comfort to peacefully drifting to sleep, Himori got out of her room and walk in the dark slowly to Hayoka room she open the door carefully)
Himori: Brother, are you still awake?
(Himori carefully close the door quietly possible and enter Hayoka room, she quietly walk towards hayoka bed and slide herself in inside blanket with hayoka sleeping sideways beside)
(Himori lay on the bed for minute before turning to sleep sideways facing hayoka back, she move closer to his back)
(Though hayoka seemed to sleep and not reacting but he already is awake when himori slide in the bed, when hayoka felt himori is just laying behind him, he felt his heart racing making him hard to sleep like this but...)
(Hayoka: Recently she been sneaking into my bed or wanting to sleep with me much often then before while in the middle of the night, is she feeling pressured or is she... reminded of what happened before? Or did she had nightmares...?)
(Himori started speaking quietly, wanting to say it all out without wanting to waking up her brother)
Himori: Thank you brother, for always being there for me and worked hard for us
Himori: I'm... such a useless burden, I can't help but think I'm just a burden, I always couldn't help you with anything and I'm just escaping reality, I really wish I'm the one that died instead of mom and dad or if I never keep wanting to go to amusement park even if is late and when mom and dad is tired, they would've been alive and fine... is all my fault
(Himori lightly gripping on edge of hayoka shirt, she quietly crying feeling like a burden, guilty and useless person)
(Hayoka clutches his shirt on his chest tightly, feeling painful and urge to cry but he won't allow himself to, he shouldn't cry because he was himori brother and not feeling painful because of himori but because hayoka feeling sad and unable to do anything to make himori stop being so harsh on herself and stop her from blaming herself, he couldn't... and so he tried to do what he could to make everything better to provide her a life where she could live like any girl that still had a family)
Himori: I can't... I couldn't stop blaming myself and I can't stop reminding me of what happened before, I don't want myself to forget, because of me both of us lost our parents when were young, I'm really sorry brother you been worked so hard and haven't had a life you should have, dating someone you love and lots more you should experience then just working, going to school and still had to worry about me, had to cook for us and buying groceries, paying electricity, water bills and even giving me the money, you done everything but I haven't done a single thing!
(Just then hayoka reminisce of their pass, no relatives and friends of hayoka parents would take them and so hayoka had to grip his hand and work)
(Hayoka: I need to do better... I need to, as a brother I'm the only one that my little sister could rely on)
(Himori: I need to become a better person, I need to! I want to relieve my brother burdens)
(Just couple of minute later, hayoka decided to turn around)
(Just then hayoka saw himori was closing her eyes with tears that soaked the pillow, when hayoka saw it he reaches his hand to pat himori head and a smile to reassure her)
(When himori felt her brother hand patting her head, she opens her eyes in a sudden feeling shocked but felt relieved after, she grip onto hayoka shirt even tighter then gets closer to him and let her entire arm held hayoka waist, she happily lay her head on his chest feeling very safe whenever with hayoka)
(Himori: I wonder... if, just if nothing bad happens, is it possible that we could've... I want to wish that I'm hayoka childhood friend and so I could become his lover with no one stopping us but thinking about it, being his little sister is all that I want and feeling content, I still haven't said that I love you hayoka but I don't know if I deserve yours or even if that us slibings could be possible to be together and so... I could only hid it in inside of me)
(Both of them love each other yet stopped by their past and because they were slibings but also glad that they were)
(All words they had and wanted to say or in a shock, their mouth opens slight but all words just disappeared into their mouth, in this moments comfort does better then any words)
(Now is just two sad soul that just wanted each other life to be better then now and live a normal life like other people with no tragedy, they both comforting each other in their arms)