"What do you mean?"
That question escaped my lips before I realized it, my gaze fixed on Phoebe.
The one who brought down the mighty Incarnus of Lux, a goddess, was… a man who looked like me?
Immediately, my thoughts went to my oh-so-loving father, Arthur Pendragon.
It couldn't be. Even though he was a terrible father to the old Mordred, he was by far a better man and a better king in this universe.
But… he is one of the strongest beings in this universe, on par with the Incarni.
Could he be capable of imprisoning a goddess and corrupting an entire civilization?
And besides, Phoebe was down here for a really long time, millennia even, and I'm pretty sure, from my memories, that Arthur Pendragon wasn't immortal.
Sure, he has an extended lifespan due to ardor, but he didn't exist thousands of years ago.
Phoebe's ethereal voice drifted through the silence, breaking me out of my thoughts.
"Yes. He almost looked like you," her empty, crystalline eyes boring into me. "Hair as white as a Luminus's, and eyes the color of human blood, filled with a warmth never seen before."
My swirling tension calmed a little.
It wasn't the High King. The man had many qualities, but warmth wasn't one of them.
Then, could it be an ancestor of mine?
Or it could be an entirely different person who eerily resembled me.
I pushed those thoughts out of my head. Now was not the time.
Right. Goddess in chains before me.
"So you've been here ever since," I said, meeting her crystalline gaze.
She nodded mechanically, like a lifeless doll, a puppet with broken strings. "Yes, I have. For about fifty thousand years."
Her words echoed in my ears before sinking into me like frost chilling my blood.
Fifty thousand years….
That is an extremely long time, enough to outlast multiple civilizations.
And to spend all that time in constant, unimaginable agony…
"I am surprised your mind hadn't broken from this torture," I said quietly. "Those Agony Thorns look quite awful."
"Oh, I turned mad millennia ago." She replied with a hollow chuckle that sounded artificial, like a futile attempt at a laugh.
She tugged on one of the chains, and more silver ichor ran down her arm.
Glimmering streams that reflected in her empty eyes as she spoke.
"The pain shattered my mind," she continued. "The ever-devouring flames of insanity consumed me."
"But time…" her voice trailed off. "Time has a way of mellowing things. For me, so much time had passed that even the flames of insanity burned themselves out."
Her eyes glittered like diamonds, sparkling, yet devoid of any essence of life. "Perhaps I should thank the Incarnus of Chronos. After all, it is by the authority of Chronos that the time of this realm is different."
"Time could heal wounds, but could also wear down objects, living beings, even gods. It had worn away my rage, sorrow, pain, and happiness."
The glow in her eyes flickered. They looked fragile. "I have been hollowed by the twisted concoction of Lilith's cruelty, immense pain, and the unrelenting passage of time."
She blinked. "But I doubt you are here to listen to my hollow and emotionless excuse of a lament."
Her empty gaze swept back to me, piercing me like one of those weird X-ray machines in Althea.
I immediately knew what she was implying.
I gave a low chuckle. "You want me to speak my life story to a goddess I just met? You already know everything, don't you?"
I crossed my arms. "And what happens after that? You'll ask me to free you in return for something?"
The Incarnus stared at me for a moment in silence before breaking it with an empty laugh that should've sounded divine, but it didn't.
It was beautiful but lifeless, like a melody from a broken instrument trying to regain its old voice.
"Ask you to free me?" she echoed. "Why would I do that?"
Her voice shifted, softening into something that almost mocked herself. "I don't wish to be freed."
That took me off guard. I did not expect this from a goddess imprisoned for millennia.
"You don't?" I asked.
She gave a faint, hollow smile. "Tell me, Mordred. How did the world outside look when you fell through the Tear?"
I was taken aback by the question and a moment passed before I could answer.
"Desolate," I said finally.
"Don't you see?" her voice was quiet, like a confession. "I have nothing left to return to. My people abandoned me."
"My beloved commanders betrayed me, and my sister…" her voice cracked a little. "…smiled as she plunged these black thorns into my flesh."
She relaxed her body and leaned back, the chains clattering softly. "And if you free me, what then?"
Tilting her head, her crystalline gaze fell on me. "I could break out of this pit, unleash my fury against the ones who betrayed and abandoned me."
The air suddenly thickened, and her eyes bored into me as she continued. "I could decimate all the daemons in this world in an instant, turn their blackened, shadowy bodies into dust with a wave of my hands."
The air rippled like molten glass. The light dimmed. A silent hum made my bones tremble.
"I could rip Naberiax and the other traitors limb from limb, make them devour their beating black hearts as I slowly slice whatever remained of their bodies."
For the first time since meeting her, Phoebe's voice changed, transforming from an emotionless hollow to something sharper, more vengeful.
It was for a moment, but I felt it, and it turned my blood to ice.
"As for Lilith…" Her voice was quiet as the grave. "I would skin her alive and pierce her exposed and black blooded flesh with my own Agony Needles, each tiny construct delivering the very same agony that has kept me company for millennia."
Her voice further darkened. "I could carve into her mind, dredge out and unleash her deepest fears and agonies, all while I paint a masterpiece before her using her black blood on a canvas of her skinned hide."
My stomach lurched, and my throat became dry as the world itself recoiled. Every single instinct in me screamed.
I instinctively stepped back, at least, I tried.
But my entire body was gripped in a frigid paralysis.
So this was the bloodlust and rage of a god.
Then, just as quickly as it appeared, the ominous and paralyzing chill faded, and reality stopped breaking apart.
Able to move, I took a deep breath and stepped back carefully.
Phoebe's voice turned back to its tranquil, hollow tone. "I could remind them as to why I was called the god slayer."
Silence enveloped us for a moment.
She gazed at me with her breathtaking crystalline eyes, filled with an endless void. "But by the end of it all. I would still have nothing."
Her words hung in the air like a soft fog.
I sensed no sorrow, no anger in them anymore.
Just the cold truth.
Tilting her head, the Incarnus spoke. "But you, child. You have a home to return to. You have someone to return to. That is why you still move, to find a way to escape this place."
"Iris Lefay," she added, the shadow of a smile on her face. "A name befitting someone so beautiful."
My eyes narrowed. "So you did look into my memories."
"It's a force of habit," her voice was soft as she said that.
"I apologize." Her empty eyes lingered on mine. "I'm also sorry for what she suffered."
Looking back at Phoebe, I remembered something that Guinevere once told me in the Shield.
"Mother…" I tried to fully remember. "Mother said that you possess the power of Restoration."
"I do," Phoebe murmured, but then shook her head. "However, I cannot restore Iris's memories. Not unless the lock restraining them is undone… or utterly destroyed."
She shifted, and her chains rattled softly. "But that all depends on my release from this place."
I frowned. "And?"
"I honestly don't care anymore." Closing her eyes, she sighed. "Honestly. I would prefer if you killed me, but I am afraid you do not possess the firepower."
A ghost of amusement passed through her tone. "So I'll just fade, slowly. That's fine."
For the first time, a real smile touched her lips. It was clumsy and fragile, like someone trying to remember how to smile.
"I hope my successor will become an amazing Incarnus."
A long silence followed between us until I broke it.
"That's it?"
Her hollow smile lingered, a faint shadow of what would've been a beautiful sight. "That's it."
My mind swirled with many thoughts as I gazed at the Incarnus of Lux, hollowed and exhausted of her existence, emptied of everything that once made her a divine existence.
And it made me angry.
"This is what Vanis sacrificed everything for?" I asked, my voice low and trembling. "An empty husk of a goddess?"
Phoebe blinked slowly. "Vanis?"
I nodded. "A paladin who truly believed in you. Her very purpose in life was to one day find you and hear your voice. She spilled the blood of many and even murdered her dearest friend."
"She damned herself, becoming a heretic for you."
My fists clenched as I took a step closer. "For a short time, she was my mentor, and it was long enough for me to see the scars of her devotion carved into her."
I struggled to steady my voice and my anger. "And to see… that the one she searched for all this time was this?"
My tone hardened as I went on.
"The first Incarnus and the strongest, one who killed hundreds of Incarni to protect her world, one who even the Malakhs revere, a selfless queen adored by her people."
Looking down on her, my voice turned into a whisper.
"And in the end, you became like this. A broken, empty husk betrayed by her own blood and chained for so long that your silver ichor now floods these halls."
Silence pressed between us.
My fury calmed down, and it was replaced by something colder.
"What a disappointment."
Phoebe didn't react. Her expression stayed eerily calm, like always.
"So those are your thoughts," she murmured. "Then, would you allow this disappointment to help you reunite with Iris?"
I frowned. "What?"
She nodded, and the faint clink of her chains echoed. "I didn't call you to free me," she said. "I only wanted to talk."
A flicker of sheepishness flashed across her face for a moment. "It's been… some time since I've had a conversation."
Again, that weird smile adorned her perfectly beautiful face.
"And I'm thankful, Mordred."
She straightened, silver light catching in her hair as her eyes met mine. "I can make a distraction large enough to force even Lilith herself to descend. You could use that to escape through the Tear."
I stared at her. "Lilith is too sharp for that."
"Oh, she will have no choice," Phoebe replied. "I'll make sure of that."
Despite my anger, I found myself almost… impressed by this empty goddess. "You really are selfless."
Her chains rattled as she tilted her head toward the remains of Alexander Zierhart. "And look where it got me and my followers."
"Chained. Drowning in my own blood. Watching my follower rot before my eyes."
"What you are suggesting is tempting," I said quietly.
I lowered myself to one knee until our eyes met, her hollow gaze reflecting mine.
"Incarnus Phoebe of the Restoration," I said calmly, like a merchant who found a golden opportunity.
"Let's make a deal."