I…knew that she wanted to use me from the start to get revenge on her brother, so I used her in the same way back in those days. How on earth was I supposed to proceed with this information as I slept in his arms? From the time that I regained my memories, I was almost content to live in isolation due to my low chances of having a family, never mind The Young Master Nam taking single look at me at all. I was so completely heartbroken when I saw that he was hanging out with Hui-Jae back then despite still making me do everything for him and now what is this? He was putting in so much effort just to make me jealous? But why? Why do that when I think I couldn't hide my inertest in him back then? Why would he do such thing just to torture me like that? Even now after he just made such a confession, he held me so close in his arms as he slept so that I could not leave his side at all. What was this man doing to me? Why couldn't he simply accept my devotion to him, even when I was trying my hardest to distance myself from him? It simply didn't work at all and didn't I always end up taking care of him? Tending to him personally? Accompanying him? Carrying out his dirty work for him? I did everything for this man, so why couldn't he just trust me? Did I…did I really have to come clean about everything now? About my own plans just to gain his trust? How else could I marry the only man that I have ever loved when he was hell-bent on torturing me, punishing me and testing me non-stop?
I couldn't sleep all night long and eventually I managed to break free from his grasp for a short while to just complete some chores to keep my mind occupied, only to run into an aggrieved Dae-Jung who had his head in his hands and was sitting at the door of my fiancé's bedchambers. "Dae-Jung? What on earth are you doing here? It is so late at night as well, you need to get some sleep at least, and do not sit here anymore…." "Yeon! Forgive me, I mean…Young Mistress Seo…I…" "I will soon be The Madame Nam, and you need to start addressing me as such…." "No! Wait! Please! I have something to tell you…" "Dae-Jung! You must never lay your hands on me! Do you have any idea what would happen to you if The Lord Nam sees you doing this! Please, retreat back to your quarters and…" "I know exactly what he would do; he will kill me for woking at you, for touching you, for speaking to you without permission and for being with you here at all."
"What on earth are you talking about? You are my servant, of course it is your job to be around me and…" "Mistress, you truly have no idea who I am, where I come from or what my job actually is, do you?" "Do you have something to tell me, servant?" "Mistress, I am the servant that The Lord Nam bought from your brother to watch your every move, to report every single word of every single sentence that you outer and record every single action that you take." "What? What did you just say?" "And your old servant, the one who died recently….she…helped The Lord Nam to transport you from the second brothel, where he knew you would be kept safe. The Lord Nam knew you were residing with him in The Fifth Prince's residence, but he didn't approach you due to his workload that he was given by The Prince which he used to turn on him…" "…to bring down The Princess Consort and her family…that is why he was working for them, wasn't he? Because of me? Dae-Jung?" "Young Mistress…there is something else that you should know about…The Lord Nam…" "Oh really? And what might that be, Dae-Jung? The half brother of Ae-Cha?" "My Lord….?"
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"…since The Young Mistress Seo has acquired her nephew at long last, I have come here to pay my respects to her and send over some new fabrics for the boy. These are all high-quality materials and…" "And you also owe my Mistress for being framed for making your brother's wife falling ill? And the death of another concubine long ago, Mistress Chung?" "I…of course I will apologise for that…and I…" "Are you sure about that? Shouldn't we be serving you instead?" "Servant…forgive me for inquiring but…what happened to your hand?" "Never mind that, I shall call her out for you, s stay right there outside." "What? May I not even enter the Nam residence?" "The Nam residence is undergoing a serious cleaning this morning and it is unsuitable for guests. The Mistress will meet you outside in the pavilion if you care to wait for 5 minutes." "Very well." I heard them speaking outside as I watched the servants hurriedly clean up the mess that my man made last night when he heard Dae-Jung tell me all of his secrets and quite bravely as well. Myself, on the other hand, was still pretty shaken up and now the servant had to live with a broken arm because of me. We were not allowed to communicate with each other at all and I was being sent home to my brother tonight because of it. As for Seon-Ho himself, he acted like nothing happened after he almost smashed his whole residence to pieces and almost killed the servant over me.
"What do you think you are doing, wife? Why are you standing by the door like that?" "My Lord! The…Mistress Chung is here to see me now and I am…" "Never mind her for now, she can stand to wait for a couple of minutes, I am sure. Come and tend to me instead, join me for some tea." "But My Lord…" "I shall not repeat myself again wife, will you come to me or look at that poorly servant for the rest of your life?" "No, you misunderstand me, I just said that…"
He wasn't willing to listen to me at all, to the point where he just grabbed me quite viscously again and sat me down next to his nephew where he had already tired himself out and fell asleep on my lap almost instantly. "Here wife, one of the palace officials managed to acquire this new tea that I wish for you to try, right now in fact." "Right now?" "Is that a problem?" The way he was looking at me right now, the menacing tone in his voice and the clenching and unclenching of his fists, it was like he was burdened with his father's presence all over again. No, what ever is was that had changed him had finally taken over him and changed him into another version of his father. No, I could not allow this to happen, not after all of the progress that he made and how close he was to achieving his main goal, I could not let this happen at all. "You seem to be in a good mood this morning, husband." "I heard that this snow-grown greens tea can only be found on the recipes of the farthest mountains of the north. This can be a project for you to start on, after we marry, you did say that you wanted to start making teas, perfumes and even some cosmetics yourself, right?" "Yes, I did say that in fact…" "There are only a handful of trees that grow this and it has been nourished by the snow well, so the tea has a refreshingly icy aftertaste to it, here, try some."
What was I supposed to say? What was I supposed to do? He didn't take his eyes off of me for single second and I barely had time to process anything that Dae-Jung had told me. "Your men must be devoted to you now after your new rise in the palace, just like you wanted." "I have everything that I want Seo Yeon, apart from a beautiful wife who will…" "Put together the image of you being the perfect family man with a wife to show off to the whole world, isn't that so?" "Well, that is one of the reasons, I won't deny that, but is isn't the whole reason and you know that." He made his way towards me as he had another servant tuck his nephew back into his bed. But now he was sitting directly in front of me and s closely that his face towered over mine with that sickly sweet smell on him still that made me want ti throw up.
"My Lord?" "My wife, Seo Yeon; the most beautiful, the most talented, the most hardworking and the most humble woman in the entire kingdom. The most interesting person with the most secrets in the world; the most mysterious, the most sensual and the most titillating woman I have ever met. Come, play the zither for me before I go off to work, you haven't played this for a while…ever since you were in the first brothel, I recall." I broke down right there and then as soon as he uttered those words; I let out every single emotion that I had felt since we were parted by the last war that he took part in. All of my hard work, the pain and humiliation that I had to bare that the time and the loneliness of it all…and I wasn't alone, not for a single second. In fact, I didn't have to be alone at all, not from the start. He knew, he must have some idea at least about what I was planning to do, even though it completely clashed with his goals at all, unless…
"I am waiting wife, play a little bit of music for me." "You must know people that are better at me than playing this…" "There are people better at you than music, that is true, but they are all emotionless. Only you can play how I want because…it is something that you have in common with your mother, isn't that right?" "But…how did you know that…my mother, she wasn't a…" "I know that she was in the same situation as you were back then, that was how you survived that place." "But you got angry at me for it…" "I have every right to be angry at you for taking it too far, no matter what the results were! You are the only person I have in this world and I cannot share you with anyone! I will not do it! Now play the zither for me and just me alone! Do it!"
"Yes, My Lord…." "Yes….husband. that is how you shall address me from now on." "Yes, husband, I shall play for you right now, for this zither is rather crisp and clear sounding…" "A cup of tea with the zither sounds as the wind ruffles the waters, such is the pleasure of life." "How do I sound, husband? Forgive me my mediates, as I haven't played this in a while now." "Your playing was fine, you were simply distracted by the poor wounded soul in front of you, despite knowing who he is now." "I wouldn't be distracted by him if you simply confided in me…" "just like you did with me, you mean?" "That is different as you know it, how could I possibly have confided in you when you knew my plans go again everything that you wish to achieve?" "Servants! Pack up The Young Mistress Seo's belongings, for she will leave this place tonight!" "No! Husband please, I wish to stay with you…husband!" "You did not commit your heart to the zither, so what can I possibly expect from you before our wedding?" "I beg your pardon for my failure to commit to your music…" "I shall see you when I return from the palace officially for our wedding, and I pray that focus on your priorities after the ceremony, or I shudder to think how you will live for the rest of your life." "Why! Why are you being this way to me! Why can't you just tell me that you…" "That I what? That I love you? After all of the secrets that you kept from me? After all that you have done under my nose? No, I shall never tell you that…because if I do, then you will hurt me more than you already have done. Seo Yeon, for all that you have done on your own, and behind my back, it is far better for us all if I control you like this for the rest of our lives…until the day that you decide to unburden your heart to me and trust in the fact that I will always protect you, because nobody is worthy of your love apart from me, so you had better give me your all girl." "You want me to give you everything and you give me rules and limitations? Like the rest of the world?" "I will fill you up with children every single night, don't you worry about that…" "Why? Why will you still want to marry me? After everything I have done and I cannot give to you…because you love me?"