Warning: If you suffer from self harm or thoughts of self harm and negative thoughts please take caution. This chapter has references of self harm and depression. If you need to stop reading for your mental stability please do.
I wasn't sure what happened next. I have a small recollection of watching Hayato's fight and going to fight my next battle but then I'm standing over the beaten body of a Iwa Genin. Which was weird since my next opponent was the other Kiri Nin.
"Kaida from Leaf wins this round. We will have an intermission before the Final Round. The Final round will be fought by the last winners. Itachi of the Leaf. Hayato of the Leaf. and Kaida of the Leaf. Out of the three only one will win." The Referee announced making the stands break out into whispers as the Iwa boy was taken out of the arena by a stretcher.
Silently I walk back to the competitors' stands. Once I got there my two teammates were the only ones standing there waiting for me.
"What's going on Kaida?" Hayato asked once I sat down on an empty chair.
"Sorry, I just got angry. It's … I found…I can't ...." As much as I would like to tell my teammates what happened, we were in another country with ears everywhere and my soulmates were on everyone's hit list. Shaking my head, my teammates glanced at each other before letting it go and we waited for our match.
After what seems like forever we are finally called down. We all stand the same distance away from each other in front of the Referee.
"Begin!" He calls and backs up but none of us move.
In between one blink and another Hayato and I jump back sticking to the sides of the stadium as Itachi starts the match off with his flamethrower jutsu. I kept my distance from Hayato even as I dodged the hot kunai and shuriken Itachi threw into his flamethrower as it tried to follow us.
In a matter of seconds I take my premade kunai with explosive tags on them out and throw them at both my teammates. Because we are a team we all thought the same thing and my kunai were intercepted by their own kunai causing an explosion that rocked the arena.
None of us let the explosion distract us. With some quick hand signs I made a lightning tiger that chased a cursing Hayato around the arena making scorch marks everywhere its claws touched. With my teammate out of the way I went straight to Itachi.
My friend didn't hesitate to turn on his sharingan as he dodged and redirected my punches and kicks. A year ago he probably would have been able to take my hits and give some of his own which would have definitely taken me out. Now though he knows he wouldn't get back up if I landed a hit on him.
One of the only positives to training under Gai for the past year. Also maybe a little help from my low grade Tsunade chakra punches.
I haven't completely figured out the technique but I have enough to make my hits break bones. As an example Itachi dodged one of my punches causing me to hit the rock he was standing on shattering it without injury to my fist.
Unfortunately that's when Hayato kicks me in the gut and cuts Itachi's forehead, getting blood in his eyes. The bad thing about being a great team was that we knew each other's weaknesses and could strike at them no problem.
The back and forth goes on for another ten minutes. Once one of us got ahead the others would step up and we would all clash again. Eventually we all were bruised, singed, and cut up out of breath and unsteadily standing back in the spots we started in. Hayato and I were constantly on Itachi to make sure he couldn't do something that could end the match.
Before we could start again the Referee called our match. All three of us sighed and we walked out of the Arena with the booing of the stadium left behind us.
"Oww." Hayato groaned as he hobbled on his crutches to our housing.
"What are you complaining about? At least you don't have spider fractures on your ribs and large bruises." I hissed as my ribs expanded too much when I took a breath too big.
Itachi was quiet even though both of his arms were in casts and a huge bandage was across his forehead.
Suddenly I felt a laugh bubbling in my chest. My shoulders shake as I try to stifle my laugh. Hayato and I made eye contact and we both burst out laughing. Out of the corner of my eye I see Itachi smiling, his shoulders shaking a little as he watches us.
I wasn't even sure why we were laughing but as our laughter died down the lightness of goofing off with my family, and at this point my team is my family, also faded. With a heavy mind and tears filling my eyes I keep my head down letting my truth out.
"You know, when I was little Daichi would read me the story about how soulmates were created. And after each time he would always say that soulmates don't always mean happiness. I didn't really take him seriously back then because I thought that soulmates were just a story but I get it now. After getting my mark and finding my soulmates I wish I could carve the ink off my skin and sever all connections to them. Not only are they older than me but I feel so worthless. I knew that even though this is my life to live I wasn't anything special. I won't be some god level hero. Or create something that would make me remembered in history. I knew that the only people that would remember me or care about me when I died would be the people I care for. I'm cannon fodder. Another face in the crowd. I didn't care about that. Just that I could live my life the way I wanted. Now I hate it. I hate that I'm bound to this person for the rest of my life and now I'm suffocating in my uselessness. I am cannon fodder and no matter what I do I will never be nothing more and that will never be enough. Not for the world. I wish I could forget and carve this off my skin. Looking at it makes me sick. And I hate it." I'm barely holding back my tears and on some plaine of my mind I realized I shouldn't be breaking down in the middle of a foreign village or revealing such sensitive information but I"m Ten. I'm a child and I feel like I'm going to be crushed under this weight and I just want it to go away.
And as my teammates say nothing and just glue themselves to my sides I hate how selfish I am to try to ask them to carry this burden with me.