~"Noooo!" Salazzle cries while I slowly come back to my senses. ~"Noooo! I messed it up! Noooo!"
A warm, sticky mess coats her stomach, running down as she towers over my half-asleep body.
She tries to pick up the goop with her clawed fingers but fails. ~"Waahhh! I'm sssuch a fuck-up! Noo-- You!"
~"Me?" Lucario replies. She pointedly looks away while still seated in the bathtub with us.
~"You're an eyewitnesss! Don't you dare tell Lopunny how it went, or I'll messs you up!" Salazzle hisses and produces a small plume of fire from her throat. ~"And you - new one! The same goes for you!"
I turn my head to spot Magearna startled. Her rigid body jolts exactly once. Her eyes zoom in on Salazzle. Her posture doesn't change at all. "Understood."
I flick Salazzle's nipple, causing her to jolt, recoil, and glare at me. "Don't be mean to Magearna. Besides, don't you know the human idiom? There's no need to cry over spilled milk."
Salazzle cranes her neck to look at her white-painted stomach. ~"Ohhh, so that'ss what it meant. I thought it was about literal milk." She tries picking it up again, failing yet again. She bats her eyes at me. ~"Still. We mussst remove the evidence... Masssster, will you help me clean?"
A drop of splooge drips down her stomach, mixes with her juices, and threatens to drip on-- I dodge at the last moment. Yuck. "Yeah. Let's get you nice and clean."
And that's what we do. For the next half hour, I rinse Salazzle down with the shower head - much to her dismay. I lather her whole body up with shampoo - much to her enjoyment. And finally, I give her another rinse to get rid of the suds.
Afterwards, I repeat the same with Lucario, who refuses to meet my eyes the whole time. She just sits there, fidgeting uncomfortably while I pamper her.
She, too, gets a pre-rinse just to get rid of any... evidence that might have stuck to her fur. Honestly, she could have left the tub at any point if we made her so uncomfortable, however, she stayed.
She stays behind with me when it is finally my turn, even offering to scrub where I can't reach.
"Thanks, Lucario." I accept, looking around while her paws glide up and down my back.
Swadloon still soaks in the sink.
In the end, I got done with everyone... except Magearna.
"Hi." Hi?! Am I shy or something?!
Her eyes roam across my face, zooming in on some details that stand out to her.
"Hi." She parrots. Her body is rusty, and her paint chipped off. The holes have already begun healing.
"I don't think it's good if water enters those holes."
"Affirmative. It will be counterproductive to my healing process if rust attacks my internal components." She closes her eyes for a second, then shows the pink glowing orbs again. "However, my reasoning module indicates that you intend to service me. A treatment with rough abrasives to remove the rust would be the first step. Afterwards, polishing with a fine abrasive to remove surface roughness and to reduce the risk of new rust forming. Lastly, hosing me down to remove foreign substances and chemicals. Does that suit your desires, sir?"
"I... I guess it suits my desires..." I mutter. "But we don't have abrasives. Dawn probably has some for her steel pokemon. That would mean we have to wait until tomorrow... "How does your body react to potions? I might be able to heal your arm right now."
She closes her eyes again. Does she always do that? Whenever she thinks about something, she takes exactly one second. "Unknown. What do you mean by potion?"
"Let me get one."
My pants, along with my emergency potion, are still in Mars' room. However, I still have a couple of potions in my bag... I'm running low, actually. I will need to restock those tomorrow.
I pull one out. A purple flask with a clear liquid inside and a white spray nozzle on top. In the right light, the liquid can be seen sloshing around - an unused potion is about 20% air.
"This is a potion. It stings a little when applied, but it'll heal most wounds. I can personally attest to it - however, I'm not sure how well it would work on your steel body and damage. Usually, it is applied topically on skin."
She eyes the potion. Her pupils shrink as she zooms in. They track the bottle when I shake it a bit to let her hear the liquid inside.
"Do you want to try it out?" I ask when she doesn't reply on her own.
"Yes."
I apply it to the hole in her dress first, to test if it counts as her body or not. A single spritz of the bottle causes the molten edges of the hole to frazzle. Tiny tendrils in lattice formation grow on all sides. They weave together and grow tiny crystals until the outer edge grows to a certain thickness. Then, even tinier crystals fill the gaps until a smooth surface remains.
The whole process takes around half of the potion just to stitch up the hole in her dress. In a few spots, it looks as if black paint seeps from pores in the metal.
"Did it hurt?"
"Yes."
"Oh. Why didn't you say so?"
"Because you said it would be painful."
"... I guess I did. Does that mean you can feel your clothing? Did the hole hurt before? Is it feeling better now?"
"No, I am a pokemon. I do not wear clothing - this is my body. The hole in my body did hurt a lot, but now it feels better."
"Hmmm... Is it like Lucario's horns?"
"Negative. The closest comparison would be Lopunny's fur."
"But Lopunny can't feel it when someone, like, cuts her fur."
"Correction: the closest comparison would be Salazzle's claws."
~"My clawsss can't feel either." Salazzle denies it.
"It seems you were correct all along. My body closely resembles Lucario's horns."
"Interesting..." Both her biology and the fact that she didn't know these things.
Pokemon... usually just know that sort of stuff.
"What about your arm? Is it in pain as well?"
"Yes."
"In that case, I'll treat it too. Do you feel pain anywhere else?" While I begin treating her body, she closes her eyes for only a second.
"Yes. Everywhere. I am in intense pain."
... "That's serious. Can you eat things?"
"Yes."
"Do you need to eat, or are you like a ghost pokemon?"
"I do not require food for survival. My Soul-Heart can provide the necessary sustenance for my body to exist. Am I a ghost pokemon?"
"Nnno. You're a fairy and steel-type pokemon." How does she not know that? "Do you know-- wait. Let's finish treating you first before we play 20 questions."
First: Sitrus Berry. It sounds like she has extensive internal damage, and unless I drown her in potions, those won't fix her.
I hold out a berry, and she grabs it. And she... holds it. "You should eat that."
She stares at the berry in her hands. Then she stares at me. Her mouth opens. "How?"
"Y-you don't know?"
"No. I know I am able to eat, because I remember having eaten in the past. However, my memories seem to be erroneous. I do not recall the process of eating."
"Well... may I touch you?"
"You may, sir."
I take her hand - the one that holds the berry - and slowly guide it closer to her mouth. She doesn't open her mouth on her own, so I help her along, gently prodding at her chin.
First, her entire head moves along with my motion. I have to direct it back in place and tell her what to do instead. "Open your mouth, please."
She listens. Her lips part, and she reveals a perfect set of teeth. No decay, not a speck of rust, just two rows of flawless teeth. I place the Sitrus Berry between those rows and guide her mouth shut.
Her incisors tear through the fruit's flesh. Juices drip into her mouth but also past her lips and down her chin.
I help her chew, watching the pulp turn to a juicy mess and feeling the juices spill out and onto my fingers. Gross. It's sticky.
"Now swallow."
She tilts her head. "H--" The moment she opens her mouth, half of it spills out. She rights her head again, keeping the remaining chewed-up berry on her fleshy tongue as she speaks. "How?" Her voice comes out flawlessly, as if the motions of her tongue were completely decorative.
"Try tilting your head back and..." How does one swallow? It's just such a natural motion. I practice it with some spittle. "I guess you push the food to the back of your throat and... just let it slide down?"
"Like this?" She keeps her mouth open while her tongue moves the remaining bits of Sitrus Berry. The walls of her throat seem to come alive as the synthetic flesh undulates, tightening around the food, grabbing it, and pulling it deeper, until it slides out of sight.
The whole process... looks strangely erotic. Especially after what I did with Mars, Lopunny, and Salazzle, I can't help but imagine how it would feel around my... Ahem. Anyway, that was just about a quarter of the Sitrus Berry. "H-here." I stutter and hold out the berry for her to take a bite. "Can you try again on your own?"
"Of course." She says, moving her head closer. Her mouth opens. She spreads her lips more than necessary - I can barely hold myself back from chuckling.
She closes the distance between her teeth and the fruit before biting down slowly. The skin and flesh of the berry tear, and a slice cleaves clean off, landing on top of her tongue. She maneuvers the piece between her molars and chews - still with her lips forming an O that allows a steady stream of juices to spill-- "Haha-- Ahem. Sorry. You can close your lips. It will help keep the liquids inside too."
She listens and eats the rest of the bite in an awfully slow and awkward way.
"It'll get easier once you get used to it. Are you feeling any better yet?"
"Yes. Thank you for doing this for me, sir."
"Don't mention it. It's the least I could do after taking so long to rescue you."
"Negative. You were the first to help me; thus, my full gratitude belongs to you."
"N-nobody else helped you? Ever?"
"Correct. According to my database, during the initial phase of my existence, Swole Solo, the traveling trainer from Twinleaf Town has been the first entity to relieve me of my ailments. There is some corrupted data before that time span that suggests the same entity has helped me before." She stares me in the eyes. "That entity is you. Please hold still while I defragment my memories."
Hold still? Defrag? Does she have a hard drive hidden away in her body?
After scanning both of my eyes, her zoomed-in eyes dart all over my face, looking at every detail for a fraction of a second before switching to the next... then they roam lower.
She's taking pictures of my still naked body.
"Hey--"
Her hands snap forward, locking my arms in place the moment I try to move to conceal myself. "Hold still, please. It will be over soon."
She's strong. She's fast. I couldn't react in time, and my arms refuse to budge... I'm not giving it my best. I'm sure I could at least escape from her hold if I really tried... right?
"Thank you." She lets go, leaving red marks on my wrists behind where she grabbed me. Gulp. "I have updated your profile with more accurate data. Since I am a pokemon and you are my trainer, I have assigned you with the alias Master. Currently, there are 67 unknown variables about your entity. Would you mind answering a few questions?"
67? "Uhm, okay. Go ahead."
"What is your favorite color? What is your favorite food? How old are you? What is your relationship status?--"
"Not so fast! My favorite color is hazelnut-brown; my favorite food is steak with eggs. I'm 14 years old, and I'm in an official relationship with Mars in the other room, Dawn Berlitz, Zoey Evans, and Akari Platinum. I have an unofficial relationship with Cynthia Shirona and Lopunny and Salazzle-- uhm, this will stay private, right?"
"Affirmative. 4 variables have been resolved. 6 variables have been added. 69 variables remain."
Oh boy. "Hold on. I think those questions will take a while."
"Correct. At our current pace, it will take infinite hours to resolve all variables. I suggest splitting this task up into smaller, infinitely long periods of questioning. My knowledge base suggests this is a course of action that commonly results in success. A colloquial term for this approach is 'dating'."
Oh boy... "Good grief. Alright. Sure. Why not? Let's start dating, Magearna. We're not actually dating. How about you ask a few more questions while I treat the rest of your wounds?"
"That is a good idea. Very time effective. I'm sure infinity will pass in the blink of an eye like that!" Is she being sarcastic? "What is Mars' family name? All other humans had one."
My hand freezes mid-motion while I am applying more of the potion on the hole in her arm. The potion continues to spray through the nozzle until the pressure gives out. "I... don't know. Mars is only her code name. She... hasn't told me her real name yet."
"Why is that?"
I continue. Again, the metal grows in crystalline structures to shape the innermost layer of her skin. Her outer layers seem to be similar to silicone. It bubbles and grows like some kind of cancer but refuses to expand too much. A little bit like insulating foam in houses with a smooth finish.
A sigh escapes my lips. "I guess it's because I rushed a few things. I never really got to know her - she just seduced me, and I went along with it. I have no idea why she acts the way she does... I know nothing about her for sure because she lies all the time... The only thing I really know for sure is that I've grown important to her too."
"Understood."
When her hole closes fully, I trace my hand over the surface. She feels just a little bit colder than a human.
"I am under the impression that you are frequently taking risks. Is that correct?"
I startle and look up at her with a raised eyebrow. "No, I--"... my eyebrow lowers itself. "Yes..."
When did that happen? I used to be too afraid of taking risks, always picking the optimal strategy in advance.
I remember clearly trying to talk myself into being more of a risk taker, because those get things done.
... I've really changed, haven't I?
When adventure called, I dropped everything and ran straight for it. And as a reward, I finally found my Mary. "Fortune favors the bold. I guess it's not so bad being a risk-taker. After all, I have my trusty pokemon to bail me out of the trouble I keep getting myself into, isn't that right, Lopunny?"
"Zzzzzz." She's sleeping.
"Isn't that right, Salazzle?"
"Hizzzz."
"Isn't that right, Lucario?"
"Zzzzzz." She fell asleep too.
"Swadloon?" Her eyes are closed. "Huh. It is pretty late, isn't it? I guess we should go to bed soon too, Magearna."
"Yes. Biological signals from your eyes and the hormones in your breath suggest you are tired. Do you require my services to help prepare you for bed?"
"No, it's fine--" A yawn suddenly creeps up and interrupts me. "Actually, could you carry Salazzle and Swadloon for me?"
She does without another word.
Together, we move the whole team back into Mars' room, where she's already asleep. When we all climb into bed, she stirs a little and wraps an arm around me. Lopunny and Salazzle too. Swadloon rests on top of us.
Only Magearna still stands beside the bed. Her hands are folded in front of her skirt, looking like an attentive maid.
"You can sleep with us if you want."
She shakes her head. "I do not require sleep. Good night, sir."
"Good night, Magearna."
It doesn't take long for sleep to overcome me.
---
Lopunny-POV:
Soft snoring enters my ears. A nice, comfortable warmth lies underneath me. My eyelids creep open, but the world stays dark. The cloudy sky outside blots out the stars and moon... Two eyes shine in the dark.
My eyes snap open the rest of the way while my ears shift to take in as much sound as possible.
Pink eyes. A faint ticking noise. "New girl?" What's her name... As I get used to the dark, her shape becomes visible - her species obvious: "Magearna. What were you doing there? Why are you still awake?"
And why is Swadloon asleep? She knows she gets the first guard shift for being the newest to join. No, hold on. That would be Magearna now.
My eyes tighten in a glare when I realize why Swadloon would go to sleep early. "Don't presume you can guard us. I haven't vetted you yet."
"Good evening, Miss Lopunny. I noticed you were awake and readied myself to greet you - I apologize if my previous activities disturbed your sleep. I do not require sleep. I was not guarding. Why do I require your vetting for the purpose of guarding something?"
She's strong. I can tell. This is a bad position. How would I fight without injuring Swole? I need to handle this carefully and with tact. "Because I'm the boss. You listen to me, got it?"
"Understood." Magearna bends at the waist, bowing to me.
Phew. I'm the master of negotiations. "Good." I shift around in the nest to get a better angle on Magearna, making sure not to pinch or press my elbows into any uncomfortable places. Don't want to wake up my mattress. "What activities were you doing before... getting ready to greet me?" What does that even mean?
"Master Solo left his and his concubine's clothes untidy, so I put them away neatly." She points at the nightstand where two stacks of fabric lie in an orderly and purposeful heap. On the top of the left one rests a red pair of panties, and on the right one lies Swole's empty emergency potion. "Before that, I aired out the bathroom, cleaned up the bathtub, put away the used towels, and dusted off a few hard-to-reach nooks and crannies."
"You..." I can feel my eyebrows scrunching up. The right one always brushes against my ear when that happens. "You cleaned up? Why? That's a human task."
"It is?"
"Yes. It's something every human just loves doing. They can't get enough of it. It's part of their nomadic lifestyle to ensure they don't leave anything important behind. So, why were you doing it?"
"The room was untidy, and untidy rooms are ugly." She states as if there were any logic behind those entirely random words. "To ensure a good morning, it is prudent not to stain one's eyes with an ugly room."
She's weird. But she's so strong. "I guess..." How can I put her in her place? Is this how Salazzle thinks of me? Hehe. Nice.
In that case, should I try it with Salazzle's underhanded tactics?
No. We'll need to fight. What are her weaknesses? That orb in her center should be the critical hit area. She's steel and fairy, soo... nothing. None of my attacks are very strong. My normal and fairy-type moves are even weak against her.
Didn't Swole want to teach me Fire Punch with a Tea Am? I'll need him to prioritize that.
Salazzle is the only one who has an advantage over her. ... This is bad! What if they team up--
"To come back to our previous topic." Magearna either misses or ignores me glaring at her for interrupting my thoughts. "What requires guarding?"
"What kind of question is that? The nest."
"What nest?"
"This." I point at him.
"Master Solo? He requires guarding? Does he have enemies? I noticed he handled himself very well against the other humans."
"Enemies?" I frown when she doesn't respond. What makes her think of enemies? Wait... "Do you actually not understand this? You're his pokemon, aren't you?"
I bare my teeth.
"I am."
I relax just a little. She might be lying. Or maybe... "How long were you imprisoned again?"
"8 million 771 thousand 202 point 90 hours."
That's, like, a lot of days. Probably. Long enough to... No. No way. That's impossible. It's in her nature! ... But what if... "Did you forget how to be a pokemon?"
She tilts her head cutely. A perfect 45-degree angle - better than I could ever do. Grrr!
"I never forget." She answers. "But I do not recall ever knowing how to be a pokemon. Is that something I should know?"
"Yes. Duh. You are a pokemon - you must know it."
"Will you teach me how?"
"No. I'm busy--" Hold on... That... And this... Uhm... Isn't that what Salazzle would do? It's a sneaky tactic. Do I stoop so low?
"Please." Her monotone plea sounds insincere, but I don't really have a choice. At least not until I get stronger.
"Alright. But only if you promise to listen to my orders. Listening to orders is something pokemon do, after all."
"Okay." Yes! She bows slightly. Urgh. No. Now I feel dirty. "From now on, I will listen to Mistress Lopunny and Master Swole's orders. In exchange, you will teach me how to be a pokemon."
"Awesome. So, what do you want to know first?" I forgot what our previous topic had been.
"Why must we guard Master Swole even though there are no enemies around?"
"Simple. There are known threats - which are the enemies. But there are also unknown threats. Like pokemon who try to sneak into our nest to steal from us or to kill and eat us. Someone must always guard the others. Thus, living alone is dangerous and must be avoided whenever possible."
I learned that lesson the hard way before I met Swole. With my family dead, I had only myself to rely on. Exhaustion crept up until some Luxio managed to ambush me.
"Interesting. Who would be an unknown threat? That man Cyrus?"
"Anyone who isn't us." I swing my arm around us to show I don't just mean me and her, but everyone subordinate to Swole.
"Are there a lot of people and pokemon who aren't us?"
Oh. She doesn't even know that? "Yes. There are too many to count, and they are everywhere. Just outside this hideout, there are at least 50 threats."
"You know of 50 unknown threats nearby? How is that possible? That is too many. Did you mean strangers?"
"No. Didn't you listen? They are not subordinate to Swole; therefore, they are potential enemies. Until they reveal themselves as enemies, they are unknown threats."
"Ahhh." Is she screaming? "That makes sense. Their threat level is unknown. Understood. Can you make a set of entities for me? I would like to find patterns to help determine who is and isn't an unknown threat."
"No. Everyone who isn't us is an unknown threat."
Her eyes close for half a second. "Okay. I will pretend that you are right." Wait - pretend?! "Let's continue with the next topic. Do pokemon regularly engage in sexual activities with their trainers?"
"No. Yes." Uhhhh... "It's confusing. Some do and some don't."
"Can you make a set of entities--"
"No!" I slam my ears over my mouth, only removing them again when Swole lets out a little snore. "No. No sets." What does she even mean by that? "Stop asking me to make those - what's wrong with you?"
"Understood. I will compile a set on my own to find the patterns that lead to human and pokemon relationships. On that note, I have observed a pattern today."
"Urgh."
"Mistress Lopunny?"
"Nevermind. Go ahead. Tell me about your pattern."
"Earlier today, Master Swole mentioned an entity named 'Jupiter' dislikes him."
"What? Who? Entity? Where is that even going?"
"A framed picture of two women in the living room captioned 'Mars and Jupiter B F F' shows a purple-haired woman alongside Mars. Obviously, they are the same entity. The only discernible difference between the women is Jupiter's purple hair. The pattern is quite obvious: Master Swole is not liked by people with purple hair."
"Are you dumb? Actually, I don't care. You shouldn't care either. That's human business. Let them bother each other with their squabbles. You just need to concentrate on defeating them if it comes to a fight."
"Would this observation not help us in determining the specific threat levels of unknown threats?"
I tighten my eyes in a glare. "I thought we went over that already? Just treat them as unknown threats."
Again, she blinks for half a second. "Understood. I will pretend this topic is over." Pretend?! "Next topic. How often does a pokemon eat food?"
"Uuurgh."
"Mistress Lopunny?"
I just want to fight her and get this over with!!! "Nothing. I guess 1 to 3 times a day."
"Would you mind compiling a set of dates on which you ate nothing, one, two, or three meals?"
"Sweet Mew... No. Sets." This is going to be a long night...
---
Narrator-POV:
Thus begins the long, long night for Lopunny, answering every question but never getting any closer to the end. One answer raises 5 more questions - no end in sight.
Her only saving grace is when midnight strikes and Salazzle awakes. She, too, creates a dozen more questions but takes over the task, allowing Lopunny to rest for the rest of the night.
She misuses the pillowy tips of her ears as earplugs to sleep soundly despite the noise.
In the meantime, the rest of Sinnoh comes to its rest. The nightlife slows to a crawl. The nightowls turn off their computers. The nightstalkers give up their hunts or return home with their feasts.
In the dead of night, a nearby star shines a little brighter. A comet, lit up by the sun as it arrives in the solar system. Scientists have been waiting for it. A certain young woman across the ocean spots it as well.
Zinnia - the precious flower of the Draconid people - gazes up at the stars with a frown marring the face of a youthful woman. She knows her time is running out. Shelgon, resting under the hand that slowly petted him to sleep, awakes with a start.
He looks at his trainer in alarm, then it fades to shame as he averts his eyes. He is not ready for the fight that is soon to come.
Time is pressing. Sliggoo, Tyrunt, Swablu, and Noibat pop out of their pokeballs one after another. On the rocky coast of Sootopolis City, the silent night turns a little brighter and a lot noisier when the flashes and sounds of battle interrupt its calm. Practice is in order.
The moon continues its race across the sky. Atop a tower near Solaceon Town, an elderly woman folds her hands before her chest and prays to the stars - her Xatu wraps his wings around her shoulders, keeping the cold at bay.
She prays for the people and pokemon who lost their lives this day. She hopes with her help their souls will rest a little easier - hopes their souls find the guidance they need. She does this every night - alone with only her pokemon by her side - ever since her husband died and left her a widow.
As the last of her line, it was on her to find an apprentice...
"Xa..."
"You're right." Her exhausted voice replies to her pokemon's cry of concern. "Let's retire for the night. Tomorrow, we can try again."
Night gives way to dawn, and back in Veilstone City, Dawn still slumbers. Her night was long and weary and filled with worry and regrets. Zoey sleeps beside her, just as spent from the evening's pacing. Their troubled sleep speaks of the fear they feel.
Only Akari awakens with the first ray of the sun cresting the horizon. She casts off the doubt gnawing on her mind the moment her eyes snap open to a room containing only herself, Dawn, Zoey, and Marley. One is still missing.
She eyes her phone resting on the nightstand. Its blackened screen refuses to reveal the truth she desires to know: what happened to Swole?
A traitorous part of her wants to unlock her phone and send him a message. But she does not. She trusts in his abilities.
In the end, she ruffles herself up, climbs out of the bed she shared with Marley, and steps into the kitchen.
For a brief moment, Akari just marvels at the incredible technology of the future before she fills the kettle with water and flicks a switch.
She is sure the others will appreciate starting off their day with a nice cup of tea to calm their nerves.