Ahead
You're hurting yourself as the same as you're hurting me.
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Sometimes life turns into a tragic conundrum, where one must follow what is worth. And for the sake of the soul, one is destined to pick the thorn. To clear the path for others. To abolish the tenacious respite. Even if it does bring sorrow, the choice can no longer hurt the rigid soul.
Jhye, I can do anything as long as he is happy.
Big Bash League is going through some tensions. Win or Loss does not matter anymore. What matters is to maintain the sake to avoid conflict. Teammates are offering some players to date. But the rigid mind asked for only one.
Phone is ringing...
"Guess what? Found him!"
The voice has been an obstacle that Jamie Smith was trying to avoid. His entity recalled the relationship he had been building since childhood. Talked back. Just to soothe him with the things ahead.
It will never be a sacrifice. I only chose what is best. Best for the time ahead.
Years ago,
"You are from Phoenix?"
Jamie nodded. That day he not only met his high school crush but also met with perilous luck. He could not forget the tone and how he had missed it since the last departure. Hands are still shaking to accept the message request. The corner of his mind twisted but could not untie the bond he had bound after the closest person went for the same road.
"Bethel, I want you to know that what you are heading for is a good choice. You have my support. Although during this period, confession is tough. But I want to suggest that you to try. You've got Richardson and Zampa with you. I've heard they want the same. Good luck!" Sent the text. He loves to call it a passage.
Some unknown message request popped up. Requesting the same he requested for Bethel. One would pass the line. Which is certain.
"Listen, the situation comes to a stage where we have to be part ways. We do not want it. Look, Pope is supporting one, I am supporting the other. And listen to me, I will never let that happen."
The words are making a vibrating melody of sorrow in his ears while making a sharp boundary around his heart. He can no longer depend on anybody. He decided he would accept whatever is coming from him. He would try to part ways after they get along with each other. He might remain in the same place with thousands of miles of distance. He turns to look at the clock. The nights are long. Long enough to demolish him.
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"I've heard Jhye didn't accept him. He is pointing out their professional status. But Philippe assured me Jhye had no interest in-" "Olie. Cut the crap. I did not ask you to give me an update on what's happening in Australia. Bethel already told me. I am afraid something might happen regarding my presence," Jamie Smith told Robinson. He booked a flight more than a week ago. He, along with Olie Robinson planned to fly to Australia to show support for their friend for his first time Big Bash League. Olie cancelled the flight three days ago. But as Bethel's best friend, Jamie remained in his decision.
A week later,
"Jhye, you have to understand."
"NO, I don't. I've called you here to tell you what I feel about you. You're telling me to accept Bethel!"
Jhye Richardson fired up when he heard the name from the mouth he never expected. He was trying to soothe him with the words he wanted to tell when they were in high school. Now that they've grown up. Yet it needs to be resolved.
A week earlier,
Philippe did not support Richardson and Smith's decision. He denied conventionally, "I do respect Bethel's choice. It is not our duty to help them build the relationship. Whatever, you know better what to do. Yeah, Jhye is supposed to respond to his feelings. I feel bad for Bethel. Jhye shouldn't act rudely. But I guess he went out of anger. I hope you'd consider. Jhye told me once he had been facing it since high school. And I did not expect it to be Bethel. He never mentioned the name cause he never wanted anybody to think negatively about him. But what about this time? He is still the same. Trying to win him like a game. He got all the support. Even though you were one of them. I know he owes an explanation. But don't you think it is his personal choice not to share who he likes? Maybe he needs time or whatever he has a specific reason and even if he doesn't have any, nobody has the right to shout just because he made his personal choice. It is all up to him."
Philippe knows how they would react just because they did not get what they wanted.
A month ago,
"Tell Jamie." He sent a voice message to Olie Robinson. He got the sense that their friend circle is divided into half 'choice-made' decision, too. But as Jhye's best friend, he knew the thing had come into his hands. He needed to fix it.
"He won't listen to me. He made up his mind that he would let Bethel get his chance. Do you actually think it is Bethel's choice alone?"
"No, I don't. That's why I am asking you to listen to his decision."
"Okay."
Two months ago,
"Jhye, if you actually have feelings for him go and tell him. Or, it's gonna be too late. What if he finds another? Or-or, he has already someone?" Philippe's words made a rigid feeling in Jhye's mind. He still can not let go of the past scene from high school. How he got insulted before his classmates only because he did not accept Bethel. He had to change the school, and even moved to Australia. And even now, he has the sense back. Same as most of the cricketers supporting him and asking Jhye to accept him, made an explicit force. But the time has changed. He decided to be the boundary between Bethel and Jamie. He still can not take the pain he saw Jamie was standing and crying behind all the classmates. And for the sake of their friendship, Jhye let it go. And yet he feels he could only change the place, but left his heart in the UK.
"I will." He always let Bethel win but if he thought of it as a game, Jhye had been waiting for the final round.
3 months later,
Still, he feels the goosebumps when he first saw Jamie in orange. He still could not resist his feelings, which bothered him while sleeping. Now that he has got himself some inches away, how can he halt the endeavour of making the feeling certain?
He remembers it is his last chance and final step. And he would be honest.
"Jamie, for how long will you'll be behind him? For how long, you're gonna sacrifice everything? Can you tell me a certain time so that I can wait till it's end?" Jhye started with a soft tone to comfort him. He holds his palm what were resting on the table beside two cups of hazelnut coffee. "I have no right to deny your decision. I will just leave the place if you do not accept me. I can make sure it will never be the excuse for my sorrow. But it is a request do not let it go just because of anybody else. Jamie, you're hurting you as the same as you're hurting me. The road ahead is not for me and Bethel. If it's not you, I will keep standing and waiting. I would never make an exception. Whatever I said I meant it. There's no turning back." Jhye could notice some rigidity inches away. Holding his face down and hiding all the torments, all the pressures. He knew he was gonna face the day. He is happy as well as sad. He is happy that Jhye finally told his feelings. Sad he failed to let go of the last thing for his best friend.
A game has a winner and a loser. Jamie becomes both a loser as well a winner.
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