What was life? What was the feeling of sleeping and waking up without purpose?, barely dangling down the rope of hopelessness and struggle, having to put up a smile to deceive the so called ones claimed to love. Looking into the mirror to see the same image staring back with nothing but no hope; wanting to reach for it but at the same time wanting to just lay back for fear but fear of what?
Fear of self. Fear of self being useless, fear of drowning in hopelessness that leads to a fall of weakness and timidity but this world..., this world that somehow felt like a dream but pinched back to reality is not a world of flowers and roses, it was kill or be killed; smart or be outsmarted, be useful or be useless. What would life be if all that could be done was stare at the dream that floated away and rolled down the eyes in tears, stare at the dream that felt distinct and unreachable, stare at the dream that was hard to keep safe in the heart. Stare in disappointment at the walls keeping self chained. No one ever understood the monstrosity fear and doubt until it ebbed at the fragile sanity hanging down the thin thread of hope.
Would giving up bring the solitude asked for? But that would be outright succumbing. Where was the motivation? Where was the will to live and feel normal? Where was the reason to not self loath at being useless?
No! Motivation was what she needed, it didn't matter what she felt; she should push self pity to the back door and lock it up but she was no fool to know the emotions were piling to the state of choking.
Swiping at the tear, Autumn pulled open the drawer to pick up the nail clipper lying among essential things. Pushing close the drawer, she positioned the teeth of the clipper right in front and behind the soft plate of her pinky and clipped down, watching as the nail came off, still hanging in between the rusted teeth of the clipper. She needed to get her head straight. Remembering the events of today, she in turn clipped another nail; the sound of the nail clipper snagging nail gave comfort to her as refound anger blazed within her, almost making her shake. Everyone had their fuel and hers was Anger. Barely hanging off a cliff but alright; she was doing this for her family. Autumn reminded herself to console her lonely soul.
She would make each and everyone of them pay; that was a promise.
Landmark pushed the Blonde roughly off his lap with a throaty growl that burned the back of his throat as he lay back in bed with an exasperated sigh. The back of his hand covered the deep shade of red that had taken the place of his usual grey; meaning his beast- demon side was hanging on thin thread before it revealed itself fully. Not even the ring on his finger could trap it back in as it glowed, burning the finger that held the ring. Something was wrong, he could feel it if not smell it and it all began ever since he got back, making him drink from different types: Blonde, Black, Brunette... almost all to quench his hunger with some brought from the underworld. Disgusted by the blood trailing down the side of his lips, he swiped it roughly with his sleeve, standing up.
Landmark crossed his arms, digging his elongated claws into either of both sides, drawing blood as he felt his body shake, but from what?. He didn't know and he also did not know what triggered the animalistic side of his demon that had been dormant for years if not thousand. Knowing he would heal from the pain he inflicted on himself, he dug his claws deeper to steady his breathing and the long throaty growl that was yet to subside, making the Blonde at his feet cower back in fear with her head hung low. Blood trailed down the side of her ripped neck skin that closed up slowly but painfully as it burned, sizzling and hissing as it closed up with tendril of smoke and burnt flesh lingering in the air, leaving her panting since she had been bitten by a High Class Demon. She never thought it would be this painful to be drunk from a High Class Demon, in fact no one told her she would go through this pain; yes, she was a demon and she had fast healing rate but still it hurt like a bitch. She could only hope the others he drank from survived especially the humans who were the weaker creatures of the food chain.
"Go!". He animalistically growled out and not needed to be told twice, she merged with the air; disappearing into thin air and leaving Landmark to destroy his room, up turning every nook and cranny, tearing down walls and smashing windows with his fist drawing his own blood as a result of being folded into his palm and his long claws embedded into his flesh like a second skin. When he was done, he looked around taking in every detail with his blood dripping from his fisted palm and creating a pool at his feet.
Landmark dipped his head back in frustration, he could hear the panicked footsteps of his Butler and Maids outside shuffling from one end to another, maybe trying to get help and eavesdropping at the same time but one thing was for sure; it wouldn't be long before the full side of his demon made its appearance and he ran rampant.