In Ian's arms as I kept pouring my sadness and sorrow i kept having flashbacks, memories of the laughter's, Cry's, fights, reconciliations,happiness and reliefs I had with Adonis.
He was not the best of the best, he was not perfect, he was not a saint nor a devil. He was my Adonis. My second chance that I fucked up.
Adonis was named after the flower(ice adonis) meaning second chances, he made my life meaningful and without him, I have no meaning, without him there is not jewel queen.
I don't know how my future will be I don't know how beautiful, gracious, bountiful or even how perfect it will be without him by my side. But I as ready as hell to face it, to face the consequences of my heartlessness, choices and decisions.
I. Am. Ready. To. Face. My. Uncertainty.