'I was very lucky.'
I thought this while looking at the book and MP3 player in my hands. With this book, it wouldn't take long before I understood the concept of sound waves.
Until now, I had learned everything on my own through empirical data, and somehow it had worked. But there was no need to reinvent the wheel when human knowledge was already this vast.
I could barely contain my eagerness to get home and read every page of this book. The best part was that I hadn't spent a single penny on it. I had received it for free.
Besides Doug's small misunderstanding, everything had gone really well. I just needed to make sure to come here alone, or at least only with Connie, next time.
I glanced back at Connie, who was pushing my wheelchair with a blank expression, lost in thought.
At the moment, Priyanka was still the one who usually brought me outside to get some sun. The reason was simple. She was afraid of leaving me alone with Connie without her supervision.
But if I could somehow convince her otherwise, I would gain much more freedom in my activities. If I could prove to Priyanka that I was fine being with Connie alone, she might go back to focusing on her work like she used to.
I knew this wasn't true independence since I still relied on Connie to reach those goals, but it was already a big step forward.
Connie also seemed more reasonable than Priyanka. She would give me more privacy and time to myself. For me, wanting to practice my abilities, that was extremely important.
The only problem was that I couldn't predict how my actions might influence Connie. I needed to make sure that everything went as it should.
I had already given up on trying to make everything return to how it was before. I was too deeply involved with this family for that to be possible anymore.
But as long as I could let Connie meet Steven as she should, while watching from a safe distance to ensure everything was fine, I believed things could still work out somehow.
It was an optimistic plan, but optimism was all I had. If not optimism, there was only despair, and I couldn't afford that.
In the process, I might meet Steven myself. He had visited the Maheswarans before, along with the Gems. But as long as I didn't draw too much attention, this plan could still work.
I decided to see myself as just another secondary character in Connie's story, like Priyanka and Doug.
The future was still bright. There was still a way forward.
I convinced myself of these thoughts, but just as my mind began to relax, another figure appeared in the distance with a biology book in his hands.
It seemed Doug had finally left the library and was coming to take us home.
My mind went blank as I looked at him, and unconsciously, I grabbed onto Connie's clothes.
If he tried to touch me or ask questions like before, I would only have more trouble.
If he touched me, I might lose my disguise or make my gem unstable. I didn't know what would happen if the energy completely went out of control, but I wasn't curious enough to find out. My life was more important than that.
And if Doug asked me about my past or where I came from, I would have to fabricate information to explain how I suddenly appeared in the hospital. But this wasn't a good choice. Fabricated data could easily be uncovered, and that would only make me suspicious.
As for telling the Maheswarans the truth about my circumstances and identity, that was out of the question. Absolutely not. Even if they accepted me, it would still cause many problems, especially if they became connected with the Crystal Gems, which would put my safety at risk.
It was fortunate that Priyanka had never asked about my past and instead formed her own conclusions. Compared to her, Doug seemed more inclined to demand answers directly from me.
I didn't know what to do about it. I felt I needed time to think of a good method, but with no ideas coming to mind, the best option for now was to avoid him as much as possible.
As I gripped Connie's clothes tightly, I looked at Doug, trying to predict his next actions. His expression no longer showed the same complexity as before. It was still a little strange, but nothing serious.
Yet as his steps grew closer, I felt my gem becoming unstable, the energy inside turning chaotic. He hadn't even touched me, but the anticipation alone made every inch of my skin beg for help.
The only relief was that he stopped at a certain distance.
"I'm sorry about before."
From a safe distance, Doug apologized while looking at me.
"I shouldn't have asked you such uncomfortable questions."
He was still clearly curious, but at least he seemed to reflect on his actions. That wasn't entirely bad, since it meant I could avoid his questions for a while.
My grip on Connie's clothes loosened a little after hearing his apology. It seemed the situation had resolved itself somewhat, even without my direct influence.
"Because of that, I'd like to make it up to you."
He even seemed to want to give me something to compensate for his past mistake. Looking at him, the image of the crying librarian overlapped with Doug's face, and it gave me goosebumps.
'I have a bad feeling about this…'
The feeling was so strong that I quickly wrote in my notebook to reply to Doug.
[It's okay.]
If Doug gave me money or anything like that, it would only bring more trouble, and besides, I didn't want anything right now. I already had everything I needed.
But Doug refused to accept my words and kept insisting on making it up to me.
"What I did caused you trouble. At least let me buy you a good meal. I can get you two anything."
He pointed at a restaurant in the distance. It wasn't far, and it didn't look crowded, so there wasn't much reason to refuse.
And as Doug had said, he didn't seem to have any intention of pressing me with questions this time, so I didn't need to worry about that.
But I still disliked it. Not only would I be spending more time near Doug, but I would also lose precious time I could spend reading my book.
I just wanted to go home.
Then, unexpectedly, a voice came from beside me.
"Are you really going to buy us anything?"
Connie looked at her father with stars in her eyes.
I glanced at her expression, troubled at first, but then I realized something.
In the cartoon, Connie had a very strict childhood. She once said she had never eaten a donut before because her parents didn't allow her to eat unhealthy food.
So for her, Doug offering to buy any meal was like tasting the forbidden fruit she had been denied all her life.
That was enough to awaken in her an excitement she rarely showed.
"Anything."
Doug confirmed without hesitation. His words echoed the same promise Priyanka had once made to Connie, and even the spark in her eyes was the same.
Now, both father and daughter looked at me in the wheelchair with expectation.
They wanted to hear my decision.
My hands moved to the paper as I tried to form a refusal, but then Connie's face became clearer in my mind.
She looked like a child seeing candy for the first time. For someone as mature as her to show such a side made my heart ache.
I didn't think I had the will to betray the expectation in those eyes.
So, though troubled and anxious, I wrote the most pitiful word I had ever written.
[Ok...]
I agreed to his suggestion, without any rational basis, just driven by emotional pressure.
Connie's face lit up brighter and brighter, and Doug also seemed satisfied.
Seeing the two of them display their emotions so openly, a wave of regret washed over me.
It seems the trip home would have to be postponed once again.
*
However, Asha wasn't the only one struggling.
While Doug and the kids were spending quality time together, Priyanka stared at her phone with worried eyes.
She wasn't the type of person to wear such an expression while using her phone. Her contacts list only held her family's numbers, two coworkers, and Asha's psychologist.
Her phone was strictly for answering calls or paying bills. She had no extra apps beyond the default ones.
But this time, Priyanka wasn't just doing her usual activities. Her search and call history now included a wide range of professionals, from private tutors to sign language specialists.
Asha was becoming more and more independent, and while this was positive in one sense, it also made her harder to guide academically. She had been stubbornly refusing Priyanka's attempts to help.
It was almost as if she had suddenly entered puberty, becoming more distant and rebellious. She would only approach Priyanka when absolutely necessary.
Priyanka knew these changes hadn't appeared out of nowhere. It had all started with their earlier conversation.
For the first time, Asha had revealed sensitive information about herself and truly opened up. It wasn't hard to see she wanted to avoid creating any problems for herself.
The good side was that she had finally allowed herself to spend more time with Connie and, more recently, with Doug.
Still, Priyanka didn't know how Doug's relationship with Asha would progress. Asha showed little interest in him and often avoided him.
Priyanka had purposely sent them out together, hoping to nurture their fragile bond.
With Connie, it was easier: she was a child of the same sex and close in age, so Asha could approach her more naturally. But Doug's case was different. Asha had never exchanged a single word with him.
On reflection, though, this wasn't unusual for Asha. At the hospital, she had rarely shown interest in anyone other than herself and Nurse Maria. Even Priyanka's coworker, Liam, who often tried to get closer, was ignored.
This meant Asha's threshold for opening up was extremely high. As Doug and Liam proved, simply sharing an environment didn't guarantee a bond.
Liam's case was even more unfortunate. He was fond of children, yet every attempt he made with Asha ended with cold stares or complete indifference. Priyanka was sure Asha didn't even remember he existed.
Maybe Maria could only get her attention because she was genuinely fond of Asha, regardless of her coldness.
Finding someone to teach or accompany Asha to school was proving nearly impossible. Priyanka had reviewed countless profiles, even the expensive ones, but each time she contacted them, she immediately knew they wouldn't work.
If the candidate was too sociable, Asha probably would ignore them. If they were too serious, Asha could be afraid.
Appearance also mattered. If they wore a black suit to the interview, Priyanka would refuse them on the spot.
She also didn't trust the government enough to rely on public professionals to stay by her daughter's side at school all day.
Asha needed someone she could trust and feel comfortable with, someone Priyanka knew well and could rely on even in her absence.
But such a person wasn't easy to find, and it would take time to be sure of their capability.
More than twenty interviews had taken place in vain.
Without progress, Priyanka lay on her bed, covering her face with both hands.
She didn't feel like she was getting anywhere.
She wanted to lower her criteria, but no matter how hard she tried, she couldn't stop herself from being strict.
She needed the right person, after all.
While she was drowning in worries, a notification echoed in her room.
Normally, Priyanka would have ignored it. But maybe because of her stressed mind, she turned on her phone, intending to distract herself.
When she clicked the notification, her face softened.
On the screen was a high-resolution image of a small girl lying in a hospital bed, reaching toward a butterfly.
It was Asha, from before Priyanka had adopted her.
[Maria (work): I just found this video on my phone, isn't she cute?]
Priyanka stared at the message in a trance.
Maria's tone was always casual. Priyanka, on the other hand, kept her replies formal and distant. Still, Maria showed up every day, finding ways to keep in touch, asking about her day or about Asha.
It was a proactive effort on Maria's part, but not an unwelcome one.
Thanks to her, even with fewer hospital visits, Priyanka had never been so well-informed.
Maria's updates ranged from the janitor's shoes to the hospital's infrastructure improvements. She reported even the most trivial details with care.
And there weren't many people Priyanka could talk to about Asha. Her circle of friends was small, and while she'd known Liam for years, they had never texted. Talking with Maria was a rare experience.
[Priyanka: It's very cute. Do you have more?]
Priyanka's tone was more casual than usual. Normally, she didn't respond so quickly. Perhaps the video of Asha had softened her mood a bit.
[Maria (work): Oh, that was faster than usual! Are you on your break, maybe? And about the images, of course I have them (/ω＼). Gimme a second!]
Soon, Maria sent more photos of Asha.
One after another, they filled Priyanka's phone. Trivial moments like Asha staring at the ceiling, and rare, tender ones like a bird landing perfectly in her hair.
As Priyanka scrolled, her heart grew lighter. Her worries seemed to turn to dust.
For the first time, she understood why pet videos were so popular on TubeTube. Looking at Asha's photos, she felt a quiet peace.
[Maria (work): Those are some of my favorite pictures (❁´◡`❁). Did you like them? How is Asha doing there? Is she adapting well?]
[Priyanka: Thank you. Asha has been adapting well, too.]
Priyanka didn't go into detail. Not because she was rude, this was simply the way she spoke to most people.
Many would be intimidated by her curt replies. Fortunately, Maria wasn't one of them.
[Maria (work): That's good! She seemed so closed and lonely in the hospital ＞﹏＜. I'm happy she's adapting well.]
[Priyanka: She has been getting along with her sister and dad these days.]
[Maria (work): What? What do you mean by "getting along"? What exactly happened ＼（〇_ｏ）／]
[Priyanka: Asha recently asked to go to the library with her sister, and their father went along.]
[Maria: That same Asha asked to go out on her own with someone? That's tremendous progress! o(////▽////)q]
Before Priyanka knew it, they were talking about everything. She kept the private conversation with Asha to herself, but she still shared Asha's little habits and improvements.
Each time Priyanka mentioned something, Maria praised both Asha and Priyanka's efforts.
Seeing her daughter praised like that gave Priyanka a strange satisfaction. Maybe that's why she finally shared the worry weighing most heavily on her.
[Priyanka: But something's been bothering me these days.]
[Maria (work): Did something bad happen??? (◎﹏◎)]
[Priyanka: I wouldn't call it "bad."]
[Maria (work): Ugh, now I'm even more curious ┗( T﹏T )┛]
Priyanka chuckled at Maria's exaggerated messages. She wasn't used to that kind of tone, but it wasn't unpleasant.
[Priyanka: I just can't find anyone who can teach Asha sign language.
I interviewed several people, but none of them seemed suitable for trusting Asha alone at school.
You said you studied languages, right? Do you know anyone decent you could recommend?]
Before she realized it, she had written quite a lot. It was the first time she'd so openly asked for help. But considering Maria's wide network, it wasn't a bad idea.
This time, Maria didn't reply as quickly. Her typing bubble appeared, disappeared, and returned. Finally, a minute later, a message came.
[Maria (work): If it's sign language, maybe I can help with that.]
Priyanka froze. Shock was the first thing she felt, quickly followed by questions.
[Priyanka: Do you know sign language?]
Her text wasn't any different in tone, but she sent it faster than usual.
[Maria (work): One of my brothers has a disability, so I ended up learning my country's sign language. I also know American Sign Language.]
[Priyanka: How good are you at it?]
[Maria (work): Hmm… maybe intermediate? I've never had problems with it, but I've never compared myself to professionals. ~(>_<.)＼]
Priyanka thought carefully. Even if Maria wasn't a professional, her experience with a disabled brother meant she was used to daily use.
And she was reliable and matched nearly all of Priyanka's criteria.
Still, there was one issue.
[Priyanka: It would be great if you could, but your work schedule wouldn't allow it.]
Maria, like Priyanka, had a job. Asha needed someone during the mornings and afternoons, the same hours Maria worked.
[Maria (work): I don't think you have to worry about that (*￣3￣)╭.]
[Priyanka: What do you mean?]
Priyanka's eyes stayed fixed on the screen. Then came something almost shocking.
Maria sent a photo of a plane ticket beside a letter.
The letter's red title read: "Resignation."
[Maria (work): You know, I quit yesterday. I even bought a ticket home since I couldn't find another job. So if it's okay with you, I'd be more than willing to help. Even if the pay's low, it's fine.]
"..."
Priyanka stared at the screen, speechless.
She had searched for months without success, yet suddenly, the opportunity was right in front of her.
At that moment, Priyanka did what any rational person would do.
[Priyanka: Don't worry about money. The government will cover it, and I'll add extra on top.]
She was willing to pay triple if necessary.
[Priyanka: Are you available to meet this weekend?]
[Maria (friend): You can count on me!! ☆: .｡. o(≧▽≦)o .｡.:☆]
Looking at the expressive reply, a smile spread across Priyanka's face. For once, she looked free of worry.
She lifted her gaze toward the sky, her eyes filled with rare satisfaction.
"I wonder how Asha will react when she hears the news."
She could already picture her daughter's face lit with anticipation.
Priyanka's thoughts were pure. Unfortunately, it was this very purity that made Asha's already deep hole sink even deeper.
If the one concerned had been watching, perhaps her eyes would have welled with tears.
Tears of blood, of course.
*
Author's note
I did something a little different in this chapter by mixing up the points of view. It's a bit more plot-heavy, but I hope it was interesting ❤️
I'm counting on you with the stones today too, and have a good day 🍪
*
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