(Cersei Lannister POV)
How long has it been? Nine years since I became Queen of Westeros? How I dreamed of becoming Queen and marrying Rhaegar Targaryen. I saw us riding a dragon together, him winning tournaments for me and giving me gifts without end. I saw the masses cheer for us and hot nights filled with endless pleasure ...
"What are you looking all pensive about, woman? Stop that. It makes you even less appealing to look at than you already are."
I hear the voice of Robert I Baratheon, the current King of Westeros and what I got instead of Rhaegar Targaryen. He looks worn out; it must have been a long night for him with some whore ... or two, for all I can tell. His hair is dishevelled, and his stench causes the flowers to wither away. How much I hate his visage and his breath.
"You should try it as well; it could help you remember the names of all your bastards." I shoot back and see his reaction.
He doesn't care for it in the slightest. Either that or he is still drunk. Based on what I have seen in the past decade, this wouldn't be surprising. He sits on a chair and starts eating, looking at our children. Although that word is wrong. My stomach turns, and fury nearly overcomes me. I see Robert's look for my eldest boy, Joffrey. He is now seven name days old and looks like a lion through and through. I couldn't be more proud and love him more than I already do. There is nothing I wouldn't do for him.
"What's the matter, boy? Cat got your tongue? You should eat more; you look like a handful of straw."
I hear Robert say to my boy, and I almost shoot up to scratch his eyes. Joffrey lowers his head and looks at his plate like a beat dog right now, breaking my heart.
"Don't speak to our son that way! I forbid-"
"WHAT? You forbid what? Huh? Don't try to help him all of the time. Smothering him like that will only make him weak ... weaker than he already is. Hard to believe that such a disappointment could come from my loin. Ptui."
He spits on the ground.
"DON'T TALK TO HIM LIKE THAT!!!" I can't hold back anymore and shout. I stand up, throwing the chair back and causing the cutlery to break.
"Sit back down before I slap you so hard the maids will have to scrape you off the wall. Now piss off, I need a drink and quiet. Heavens, what a shit start to a day."
*Knock Knock Knock*
The door opens before I can take my babies and leave. A Kingsguard enters.
"Your Grace, the Master of Coin, Lord Petyr, has arrived. Would you like me to tell him to come back later?"
"No, send him in!"
My plans to leave suddenly disappear from my mind as I hear who has arrived here. I didn't know Lord Petyr would arrive. I have to know what this is about now. I can leave after I hear everything.
"As you wish, Your Grace." The Kingsguard bows and waves Lord Petyr in.
I observe the tall but lean man enter. As usual, he is dressed impeccably. His looks and intellect are what keep me up at night, and when he smiles, I usually have to change afterwards. Unlike all the other snakes in King's Landing, Petyr Baelish is the only one who has ever spoken and conversed with Joffrey and my other two cubs. I remember the time when Joffrey used to command him around ... that didn't go so well. I have never seen Joffrey change his tone when talking to someone whom he sees as a servant. Despite being in the same room, I can't tell what happened. But what I do know ... never mind.
His confident smile is missing as he enters the room and waits for Robert to say something. He always smiles and is kind to most people. If he isn't, then you have crossed him greatly. I have yet to be certain whether he is a sword-swallower, but I haven't yet received a lust-filled gaze from him, which bothers me greatly. My spies can't find out anything about him and his plans, whatever those might be.
"Are you not going to bow to your King?" Robert asks as he downs a cup of wine in one go.
"Is there a King present?"
"... What was that?" Robert narrows his eyes as he hears that response. I hold my breath as I hear this as well and can't imagine anyone talking to Robert I Baratheon like this ... well, maybe Father, but that's different.
"You asked for me to come here, Your Grace. What can I help you with?"
"You should control your tongue, or I'll rip it out and make you eat it."
"..."
Robert looks at me and then waves his hand.
"Leave woman and take your brood with you."
I bite my tongue and take Joffrey by the hand. I grab Myrcella and Tommen and then move towards the door. I look back again and catch Lord Petyr winking at Joffrey as my boy looks back shyly. What was that? There was mischief in his eyes right there. What is the relationship between them?!
I close the door, hand my cubs to the maid, and stop to listen to what is being discussed.
"Fascinating display of power, Your Grace. So, I assume this is about money. That is usually the reason for your summons, and since you probably just awoke, I am glad to claim the few minutes of soberness."
"Provoke me one more time ... and I will smash your head in."
"To do that, you would have to move, Your Grace and I have long faced the reality that without a war or a woman in your bed, you don't do that anymore. Now, let us drop the pretences and get to the matter at hand. What is it that you called me here for?"
"You will attend the Small Council meeting today."
I hear Robert say in a low voice. He seems angry, but I'm not certain why. Telling Lord Petyr to attend the Small Council is stupid; he always attends.
"Your Grace?"
"YOU WILL ATTEND THE SMALL COUNCIL MEETING!! NOT ANOTHER WORD FROM YOU!!"
...
For a moment, there is silence. How I wish I were in the room right now. Robert's anger has already painted my body, but I haven't seen the Master of Coin flinch about anything. So I can just imagine how he isn't fazed right now and just waits for Robert's anger to cool. Littlefinger was no threat to anyone. A clever, smiling, genial man, everyone's friend, could always find whatever gold the king or his Hand required. I never cared how he did that, but one does wonder whether he is doing it using underhanded methods.
"Your Grace, I always attend the Small Council meetings. So naturally, I shall attend this one as well."
"You better. I am sick of your manners and the kind words you spit. Among the snake pit that is King's Landing, you are the worst one, with your nice outfits and constant pleasant demeanour. Your way with words and money. How you talk to everyone and they consder you their friend. It makes me sick. I am here to tell you that that won't happen anymore. You will now follow my commands and wishes, and if you don't, I will crush your skull with my hammer. I have wanted to do that ever since you appeared in King's Landing."
"Well, don't let my pleasant demeanour fool you, Your Grace. I, too, have been known to violate the statutes of man and not a few of the laws of the religion. But I will follow your wish and have something prepared for the meeting."
"Now piss off."
The door opens, and Lord Petyr exits the room. I wait for him at the end of the hall. He smiles as he sees me.
"Your Grace, are you waiting for me?"
"I was, Lord Baelish. I wanted to ask you something."
"I feel flattered. How may I be of service?"
"I was wondering if I could attend the Small Council Meeting today. There are some things I wish to say, and I believe you would profit from having me there to convince Robert."
"Oh. I'm unsure about that. His Grace isn't known to be interested in what we have to say."
"I'm sure if you try it, you can do it."
"You flatter me again, Your Grace. As you wish, I will do my best."
Of course you will. Of course you will.
.
As usual, the Master of Coin has achieved what he set out to do. Lord Arryn has allowed me to attend the council meeting and even convinced Robert, who was not interested in discussing things any further.
"Right, I don't have any sort of patience for the lot of you, especially since the witch has arrived. The only topic I care about today is the tourney and the incest children, Daenerys Targaryen and her brother, the beggar." Robert says as he sits in the chair.
"Of course, your Grace, and how do you suggest we pay for such extravagant plans?" Petyr asks.
"You're the Master of Coin. Isn't that what you do all day? Wobble about and amuse whores who you don't spend the night with, so you go ahead and play your own flute? Or was that supposed to be a secret?" Robert asks, trying to embarrass Lord Petyr.
"Indeed. But no matter how many coppers I turn, in the end, they're just coppers and we would need a lot more gold for the endeavour as you have in mind." Lord Petyr says.
"What do I care about that?! Get on with it and get the money here! I don't care if you have to go and beg the Iron Bank of Braavos on your knees to do it! Just do something, so we can afford it and shut up about it!" Robert bellows.
"After the large financial hole you dug the kingdom these past years, I'd say we're lucky we can think about contracting a Faceless Man at all. I know that you don't care about counting coppers, but you will cry when you can't afford to fuck another whore and drink yourself to unconsciousness. But hey, this is your Kingdom. You can cry if you want to."
...
Everyone is quiet when hearing Lord Petyr utter such insulting words. He could be killed for that, and I am unsure why nothing has happened yet. Petyr looks at Robert and doesn't flinch at all. How does that make my knees weak? I'm glad I am sitting already. Robert stands up very slowly.
"A little respect is what you should give me. I am your King, show me some damn respect!" Robert says, and his face is turning red with anger. The wine is making him seem to have more patience than he does.
"And what good would that do? Where would it even go? But to the bottomless, gaping pit of self-pity you call a soul." Petyr responds.
I feel my jaw almost hit the table.
*BANG*
Robert hits the table with his fist. His head has turned fully red, and I see him reach for his warhammer.
"You see, a King who needs to say that he is the king is no true King. You lost your drive the moment you realised that you couldn't conquer Lynna Stark because she had died. And after finding out about it, man-child that you are, you drown yourself in wine and sexual pleasure to 'console' yourself. But I don't buy it. I bet you don't even remember her face. She was nothing but the next woman you wanted to subdue." Petyr continues.
The air is so thick that you can cut it with a table knife.
*BOOM*
Robert's fist smashes the table, breaking it and proving his immense strength. I get to experience this from time to time. He grabs his warhammer and moves towards Petyr, pulling it up. But before he can smash Petyr to a bloody mess, the Kingsguard appears before him and stops him. Heavens, what is happening?!
"Your Grace, please don't."
"Wha-... WHAT IS THIS?!!" Robert shouts, and the doors open up, allowing more guards to pour in.
"Ah, ah, ah, before you touch me, I suggest you read this document. It contains quite important information, and it would be bad if the public learned this." I hear Petyr say.
He throws a document towards the Lord Hand, who is just as baffled as everyone else. Even the Spider has some true emotions on his face as he watches Lord Petyr. Petyr hasn't moved from his spot. He remains in his seat and does nothing.
"GET OUT OF MY WAY!!" Robert shouts and grabs the Kingsguard by the armour, pushing him off.
"ROBERT!!" Jon Arryn shouts and steps between Robert and Petyr, stopping him.
"Out of my way-"
"STOP! Read this!"
After several shoves and pulls, Robert finally reads the document. His demeanour darkens more and more, and then he suddenly rips it into pieces.
"Don't worry, it was a copy. I have the original. Now, should you touch me, I will release it to the world and have all of Westeros laugh at you." Petyr says and stands up from his chair.
"I will kill you..." Robert growls.
"You see, you are not desirable. You are just a bad match." Lord Petyr says.
He walks out of the Small Council room. Just before he reaches the door, though, he stops and looks back one final time.
"Oh. Take this as my resignation."