The flying lancemen and fucking drones were the most annoying things to deal with as we had to run along the highway and even underpath as the dicks blocked off the way forward.
"You might be wondering why I would risk my neck helping you. It's because before Atlas came to Pandora I didn't get much traffic through my bar. Once they came and started oppressing the rest of the planet that changed as all those fleeing them passed through my doors and usually left with less money than they arrived with. The occupation of T-bone junction and the highways by that general and his men have been killing my business and you are going to solve that for me. Simple as that." Moxxi sent over the echo as we moved to the second checkpoint.
"Well she's honest if nothing else." I said with a chuckle as I blew up yet another drone.
"Less talking more killing!" Brick roared as he grabbed one of the flying lancemen by the leg as they got too low to the ground and was now being used as a ladder by him.
Finally though we got to an area with a Catch-A-Ride and could mount up again to reach the next checkpoint. This time the lance were much more prepared as there was only one way up and forward to the controls for the barrier, normally that is. I could have easily just tossed Brick up there if I wanted to or Lil could just Phase walk in without any trouble. We didn't do that. No we walked right into the defensive positions they set up and showed them the error of their ways, violently. I even devoured their lifeforce as we went so that the fear would make the remaining ones extra tasty.-
Finally we cleared out the checkpoint and gathered up the loot after shutting off the barrier and breaking the controls to keep it that way. We grabbed the racers that Moxxi had scooter whip up that were in truth just slightly supped up runners. According to her we needed the speed these things would give us to make it into the lockdown palace. Moving along the highway we passed an underpath with a name called "Midget town" that I assumed held that name because only little folk lived there.-
I thought it odd since only the little league seemed to be all midget as far as I could tell but I guess the precedent existed before it. Finally we reached the area of this rocky desert land through a tunnel that had the old prison.
"Time to test your driving skills. You need to ramp through a small opening in the outcrop before reaching the area above it across from the prison. Hubby number ones shack is up there and I always thought it would make a sick jumping ramp, time to find out. Use an echo once you are in the prison to let me know you made it." Moxxi sent as we got close to the first ramp she mentioned.
The racer Brick, Mordy and I were using went first and cleared the hole no problem and Roland and Lil's came shortly afterwards. We drove around the piece of the highway to the location of the shack and I had to agree that it was a good ramp. We took aim and unleashed all our boost as the racers went up the roof and shot us over the prison walls and into it's courtyard. We cleared out the six patrolling bandits before using the nearby echo transmitter to let Moxxi know we made it.
"Ha Ha! You made it! Bet those bitches weren't expecting you to land on their heads! Ok I'm sure Mr. Shank is holding your girl in one of those cell blocks. Get in the prison." she said and we did before she continued. "Your only hope of getting Athena out is this little teleporter device she had. We got hit so fast at the club she never got a chance to use it. I can guarantee Mr. Shank has it in his possession by now. You'll need to get it from him. No doubt this is an "over my dead body" type deal so don't feel bad if you have to end his life. Aim low." she said before cutting the call.
Inside the prison was dirty and sad with rusted metal and concrete walls and floors with poor plumbing and wiring. We followed the unguarded hallway until we reached a thick breach door that opened on it's own. Inside we met the inmates. Bandits wearing the black and white striped clothes but with the addition of security guard hats or bandanas and goggles. Killing them we moved on only to get echoed by an unknown number.
"Are you attempting stealth? Is this what stealth looks like to you? You're on camera by the way and this is the first non rerun we've all seen in like fourteen years. Chaz even made chili cheese fries. Chaz is really nice. anyways if you're looking for the girl I can assure you she is unharmed. Not that we wouldn't, I mean i'm thinking about harming her right now. Maybe Chaz will come." the obviously gay dude who was clearly Mr. Shank said.
"Anyone else think this guy is trying too hard?" I asked and got many nods.
"It'd be more believable if he even sounded mad at all, not just like bored." Lil said and I shrugged.
"Maybe he somehow doesn't see us as a threat?" Mordy suggested.
"Fucking how though!? We are literally on camera right now turning dudes into pink fucking mist! Unless I'm wrong this guy is totally just another dude right?" I said offended by the very idea.
"Can't apply normal logic or good sense to bandits." Roland pointed out.
"I guess but even these crazy bitches can't be that stupid right?" I asked and got looks that answered my question "Yeah I should know better by now. Is it too much to ask for enemies that can comprehend how properly fucked they are?" I asked helplessly.
We moved through the halls smoothly after that and soon the prison took a lazy turn as the place became unhewn stone for walls as the architects or builders got lazy with the place. Strangely we came to the location of the bandits vehicles and found a Claptrap unit. One with a black and white striped paint job and hilariously enough a car boot on it's singular wheel stopping it from moving from that spot.
"I will do literally anything to get out of here. ANYTHING. Not too big not too small, know what i'm saying?" the bot said propositioning us.
"That's a first. You some sort of criminal claptrap unit?" I asked the bot.
"I'm innocent of stealing all those panties I swear! I was framed, I have no idea where they came from, I simply must have been framed!" the bot said and I had to stop myself from rolling my eyes.
https://www.pa treon.com/user?u=81578854#:~:text=pa treon.com/pa treon_loskro
_______________________________________________
Alexander Drake
Lifeforce: 977,029
Integrated Traits: [Clever mind-Rare grade],[Enhanced senses-Epic grade]X2, [Supreme armored hide-Epic grade]X2, [Energy projection-Legendary grade], [Superior vitality-Epic grade]X3,[Lesser dragon breath-Epic grade],[Regeneration-Epic grade]X2, [Disease resistance-Epic grade],[Amphibious lungs-Uncommon grade], [Thermal sensing-Uncommon grade], [Water resistance-Common grade],[Active camouflage-Epic grade], [Eridian engineering expertise-Mythical grade], [Efficient lungs-Rare grade]x2, [Biometallic bones-Epic grade], [Quick thinking-Rare grade], [Minor spatial awareness-Epic grade], [Siren(Phaselock)(Altered)-Mythical grade], [Adrenal rush-Rare grade], [Mechanical engineering expertise-Rare grade]X3, [Gunsmithing expertise(degrading)-Common grade]X3, [Mechanical Savant-Epic grade], [Embodiment of destruction(partial)-Mythical grade], [Siren(Phasetrance)-Mythical grade], [Supreme body-Legendary grade]X3, [Martial savant-Legendary grade], [Tinkering instinct-Rare grade]
Stored traits: [Agelessness-Legendary grade], [Beautiful form-Rare grade]X3