Note: This Chapter is Re-Translated on 8 / 10 / 2025
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Chapter 60: Lancelot: Master, You're a Genius!
For all of Shinji's shameless, logic-twisting excuses, Archer still guarded the last scraps of dignity he had as a Heroic Spirit, stubbornly refusing to project the "Holy Relic" Shinji wanted—Leonardo da Vinci's paintings.
"If that's the case," Archer said dryly, "I might as well project a movie camera. Who knows, maybe we'd summon Edison to do the filming for you."
"No way," Shinji shot back without even thinking. "A lion wandering around the set would terrify everyone."
Truth be told, Shinji was curious. If you used a Noble Phantasm projected by Archer as a summoning catalyst, what would appear? The original owner of the Noble Phantasm? A variant of them? Or maybe… another version of Emiya himself?
"I think it's worth trying sometime," Shinji muttered under his breath. "I'll get Ophelia to test it out later."
"Just don't come crying to me when you get gutted in your dreams again," Archer said flatly.
"Oh, please. It's not like I'm gonna accidentally summon Jack," Shinji replied with a forced chuckle, raising the megaphone in his hand.
"All departments ready! We're starting the shoot!"
On cue, Saber—Arturia—straightened up in front of the camera, her face adopting a solemn, knightly composure.
"You're not expecting me to hold back just because of your face, are you, Lancer?"
In contrast to Arturia's seriousness, Diarmuid moved with an easy grace, his every gesture radiating quiet confidence.
"If that's the case, then I'll be disappointed."
"So, this is the famed Magic Resistance of the Saber class…? good. If I were ordered to kill a weak woman, I'd lose face entirely." He twirled the long twin spears in his hands with smooth, deliberate motion.
"He's got guts," Archer muttered beside Shinji. "If he actually tried that with me, I'd just blanket-fire arrows over the whole area."
"Shh, don't get your voice in the take," Shinji hissed back.
Still, inwardly, he agreed completely. Against a skill-based Heroic Spirit like Diarmuid, the simplest strategy was the classic: Buddy, times have changed.
If it were him, he'd have Arturia open the fight with an area-wide Excaliblast to erase Diarmuid from the battlefield outright.
True, her identity would be exposed… but if you ended the battle before anyone else arrived, all they'd know was that this Saber could fire beam attacks. There were plenty of Sabers like that—who'd guess King Arthur was actually a girl?
Of course, if you actually did that, the plot couldn't move forward.
Why did so many movies feature characters suddenly acting dumb? It wasn't because the creators didn't notice—it was because without that drop in IQ, there'd be no conflict, no tension… and no story.
"Then let's finish this, Lancer!"
In front of the camera, Arturia had finished her obligatory pre-battle lines. She charged forward, raising her invisible sword high toward Diarmuid.
Shinji quickly pressed the dolly control, the camera gliding sideways to match her footwork.
After a brief burst of movement, Saber and Lancer clashed, sparks bursting from the scraping of steel and briefly illuminating their armor.
"Cut! That's good for this shot!" Shinji called.
The actors were done for now, but the crew kept moving—next they had to film close-ups of the weapons striking.
In the industry, there was an old saying: The better an actor can fight, the longer the shot. If the shots are short and choppy, it means the actor's skills aren't up to par.
Shinji agreed with the first half—without solid skill, you couldn't sustain a clean, continuous fight scene. It was too easy to break immersion. Chopped-up short shots were often the only way to hide the flaws.
But the second half wasn't always true. Sometimes, rapid-fire cuts weren't a cover-up—they were a stylistic choice to ramp up tension.
Just like this Saber vs. Lancer battle—Shinji wanted to emphasize their swift, lethal movements, so he'd decided on a fast-cut editing style to heighten the spectacle.
The first battle between the Heroic Spirits of the Fourth Holy Grail War dragged on until late September before Shinji finally declared it wrapped.
By then, Kayneth—who had long since finished his own scenes—had already ended his little trip to Japan and flown back to the UK.
Waver, on the other hand, remained in Japan, enjoying what the Modern Magecraft Department had officially approved as his "travel leave" for filming—though "enjoying" might have been too generous a word.
Not only was this rare vacation spent working on set instead of resting, not only did he have to gulp down strange potions before every shoot to forcibly revert his body back to that of a 19-year-old—
Kayneth had also told him point-blank that while the lectures back at the Clock Tower would be covered by other professors, all of the departmental paperwork would just pile up nicely, waiting for him to come back.
By the time the calendar flipped to October, the Time Group had begun its early promotional campaign for Fate/Zero.
Sure, starting promotion before the movie even finished filming might seem premature, but they weren't releasing anything heavy—just a few stills here and there to say, Hey, we're making a new Fate movie.
The real reason for the rush was to inject some heat back into Fate/Stay Night, whose hype was starting to cool, and in turn, make its box office numbers look even better.
Big-budget, effects-heavy blockbusters had explosive ticket sales, yes—but their lifespans were notoriously short. Unlike those slow-burn films that could run in theaters for over half a year, Fate/Stay Night's numbers had already started to decline in September.
Still, it was nothing but a textbook box office curve, and neither Shinji nor the Time Group were the least bit concerned.
After all, no matter how amazing Shinji's magecraft was, he couldn't hypnotize the entire planet into watching Fate/Stay Night once a month forever.
If he could do that, why not just make the whole world wire their bank accounts directly to him instead?
But with Fate/Stay Night's gradual decline came the return of certain critics—those who'd been publicly humiliated by Fate/Stay Night's earlier success. They crawled back out to start trash-talking again.
"This kind of shallow, hollow movie could never have lasting box office power."
"See? Just a few months later and it's not even in the weekly top ten."
They zeroed in on the week-to-week numbers, conveniently ignoring the fact that Fate/Stay Night had already smashed past 600 million dollars worldwide.
Really, when it came to self-delusion, people everywhere were the same breed of bird.
Of course, the Time Group didn't just sit there and take the hits. Through their own media channels, they kept broadcasting the $600 million figure to remind everyone just how successful Fate/Stay Night actually was.
Granted, using box office numbers to judge a film's quality was reductive.
But for the majority of people, aside from awards won, nothing shouted "This is a great movie" louder than ticket sales.
While the film industry entered its second all-out war over whether Fate/Stay Night was "good," Shinji's shoot in Fuyuki was already in its final stretch.
With parts of the Einzbern estate set completed, he moved on to the last of the outdoor location shoots.
Urobuchi and Nasu had different philosophies when it came to story, and it showed in the shooting. Fate/Zero had far more wide-open exterior shots compared to Fate/Stay Night.
First up was the high-speed chase between Arturia and Iskandar.
In normal filmmaking, car chases weren't actually filmed at breakneck speeds—often, the vehicles moved so slowly during dangerous shots that an old granny in a wheelchair could overtake them.
But Shinji was not "normal."
For the sake of realism—well, actually, because it was easier—he simply had Arturia and Iskandar floor it through the city set in the outdoor backlot.
Given that both the chariot and the motorcycle were moving so fast that no ordinary vehicle could keep pace, Shinji had Medusa mount Pegasus to film alongside them.
"Arturia, you need to stay behind Iskandar—don't go speeding past him," Shinji instructed, standing in the middle of the carefully dressed street set, addressing Saber on her motorcycle.
"Remember, in the story you're supposed to chase him past the downtown area, then cut him off in the mountains. And one more thing—"
He walked along the planned route until he stood beneath a neon-lit building, then pointed up at the glowing signs.
"You need to do a hard stop here, then flick your hair."
"…Flick my hair?" Arturia asked, narrowing her eyes in puzzlement. "Why would I do something so pointless?"
Shinji gave her a look. He'd thought she would've grasped it after all the filming experience she'd gained so far. Still, he spelled it out.
"It's to increase your character's appeal. Arturia, I want you to flick your hair in the coolest, most striking way possible. Got it?"
In another kind of movie, the heroine at this moment might arch her back, wiggle her hips, or bounce her chest a little to flaunt her figure.
Unfortunately, the King of Knights before him was not in her Lancer form, and even if she popped the buttons off her shirt, there'd be nothing to bounce.
Since she couldn't play up sex appeal, Shinji could only make her lean fully into her "cool factor."
Who said a flat figure couldn't be a goddess? Gal Gadot wasn't exactly overflowing with curves either, and yet the whole world still cried, Long live the goddess!
Granted… Arturia didn't have the long legs, either.
Arturia's eyes narrowed further. With her natural intuition, she seemed to have guessed what he was thinking.
"I understand, Master."
She wasn't stupid. She knew perfectly well that her popularity in Fate/Stay Night hadn't come from her acting chops, but from the way her looks and presence had captivated fans by the thousands.
It wasn't the most comfortable realization—she felt she could do more—but she understood Shinji was just making the most of her strengths.
Put bluntly, she could live off her face right now, but she wanted to earn it through skill.
Unfortunately, she wasn't quite at that point yet—so the face had to carry her a while longer.
Once the clapperboard snapped and the scene began, Arturia revved the motorcycle and tore after Iskandar. When she reached the neon district, she suddenly executed a wildly impractical drift-stop, then flicked her hair toward the camera.
The shot caught her face—sharp, beautiful, and her gaze like a blade—and for a moment, anyone watching would feel their heartbeat quicken.
"Cut!" Shinji's voice rang out over the set. "Perfect, Arturia! Absolutely perfect!"
The result had exceeded his expectations. He was already mentally filing this as her solo poster for the marketing campaign.
"I can even print her autograph on the poster," he mused aloud. "People will trample each other to get one."
"Um… Master."
Shinji turned. Lancelot had sidled up, rubbing his hands awkwardly.
"What is it?"
"That poster… could you give me two copies?"
"Two?"
"Yeah. You'll probably summon other Servants in the future, right? I want one for my collection, and the other… to show off to them." Lancelot scratched his head with an embarrassed grin.
Shinji gave him a deadpan glare. "Should I give you a third one, so you can have a 'collection copy,' an 'admiration copy,' and a 'missionary copy'?"
To his dismay, Lancelot suddenly seized his hand.
"Master! You're a genius!"
"Get lost!"