Chapter 347: Shinji: It's New Year's, So Let Me Reheat Some Old Drama
"The final cut of Garden of Sinners will be ready by the end of March at the latest. Lissy, have some faith in me."
Shinji lounged back in the sofa chair, one leg casually crossed over the other, speaking to Cloris beside him.
"It better be."
Cloris clearly wasn't convinced. She reminded him again, "Post-production and promotion for Garden of Sinners are happening simultaneously. If you can't finish on time and the release date gets pushed back, the whole group is going to become a laughingstock."
Shinji smirked. "Are you sure you're worried about the group's reputation… and not your reputation within the group?"
Cloris lifted her hand, flexing it lightly. "Little Shinji, don't make me repeat myself. I'd be happy to rip that mouth right off."
"L-Lissy, could you stop threatening me with violence every time?"
Feeling guilty, Shinji slowly uncrossed his legs.
Cloris flicked her hair with a slightly irritable toss. "Hmph. I rarely get time off to come here and relax, and you keep reminding me of work. Are you picking a fight on purpose?"
'Who exactly brought up work first?'
Shinji could only shake his head helplessly.
But he knew Lissy had been unusually on edge lately because of work, so he didn't push it.
If not for the end-of-year holidays—Christmas rolling straight into New Year—Cloris wouldn't have had the chance to visit Fuyuki City to unwind at all.
'Let's just chalk it up to PMS,' he told himself.
Of course, that was a thought Shinji would never say out loud.
It was the very last day of 2006, and spilling blood right before New Year's—especially his own—was bad luck.
"Lissy, since you're already in Fuyuki City, just relax. Watch some TV, chat with everyone, enjoy your rare vacation."
"Hmph~"
Arms crossed, Cloris snorted. "And how is that different from saying 'drink more water'? Is this really how the Clock Tower's Harem King tries to flirt?"
Shinji's right eye twitched twice. "...I am genuinely concerned about you, you know."
"Then I'd rather you fake concern and fake flirt with me."
"Sorry. I refuse." Shinji's answer came instantly.
He truly didn't dare. If he actually flirted with the woman in front of him, she'd probably take the opening, pounce, and drag him straight into an empty bedroom.
Even worse, whenever Lissy was around, Shinji couldn't flirt with any other girl either. Otherwise he'd be spending New Year's laid up in a hospital bed.
As a friend, Shinji was happy she came to Fuyuki City to relax.
As himself, Lissy was the biggest obstacle to his New Year's flirting opportunities.
Just as Shinji was wrestling with that dilemma, Mordred suddenly popped out from behind him and slapped a hand on his shoulder.
"Master! Do you have any of Miss Ryougi's snacks? Father said she won't enjoy the movie without them!"
Shinji rolled his eyes so hard they almost stuck. "Arturia isn't here for the movie—she's here for Shiki's cooking!"
"Ahahaha…"
Mordred scratched her cheek awkwardly. Seeing Shinji's expression turn dangerous, she quickly shifted topics.
"A-anyway! Master, you look pretty lively today… is your relationship with Miss Flora going well?"
"…"
A pity, really.
Such a nice kid—why did she have to come with a mouth?
"My personal life is none of your business. Shiki's still in the kitchen. She'll bring out the snacks before the movie starts."
Since this was their final gathering of the year, Shinji had invited everyone he could.
Counting the people coming, they could probably fill a small theater.
The increase in headcount naturally multiplied Shiki's workload. She had to stay in the kitchen for quite a while to prepare snacks for everyone.
"In the kitchen? I'll go check on—"
"Absolutely not!"
Shinji cut Mordred off so hard it almost caused auditory whiplash.
"Mordred, you are not going in there!"
Even Cloris joined in to block her path.
Letting anyone from the Round Table group into the kitchen had long been recognized as a community-wide taboo.
If Arturia went in, she'd devour everything in sight.
No matter how fast you cook, the King of Eating could clear it faster.
If any of the other Knights of the Round Table went in, it would be even worse—none of them had the slightest culinary talent. They would leave the kitchen looking like a disaster zone.
That post-war Syrian-ruins-like aftermath was Archer's eternal nightmare.
The movie would start soon—why not just sit quietly and wait for Shiki to bring out her snacks? Why invite chaos? Why add suspense to a New Year's party that was supposed to be cheerful?
Did they have too much free time on their hands?
Truth to be told, few people here were really waiting for the movie.
Besides celebrating New Year together, the real thing everyone was waiting for was Shiki's snacks.
The movie? A mere accessory!
Not just the people at the party—even viewers waiting for the TV broadcast weren't expecting much.
Because the film's name was:
"Fate/Kaleid Liner Magical Illya: The Eighth Card."
To put it bluntly, it was the last few episodes of the Fate/kaleid liner Prisma Illya TV series stitched together, with a handful of new shots added—barely enough to count as a "movie."
Fate fans glued to their TVs were there entirely for the so-called "new footage," not for the story they'd already seen.
And this was the New Year's special Shinji had planned for the TV station.
Originally, Shinji had considered making a Japanese-style variety show featuring his Servant actors, letting their star power boost ratings.
But he vetoed his own idea quickly.
The issue was simple: anything airing on the night of December 31st would be competing with Kōhaku Uta Gassen for ratings.
Variety shows did get high ratings normally—but on New Year's Eve? Anyone who liked variety shows would already be watching Kōhaku. Who would watch his show?
Instead of producing something mainstream and fighting a losing battle, it would be better to make a niche program specifically for Type-Moon fans. That would be far easier.
Shinji knew his audience well. For Fate fans, whether it was a Servant variety show or a stitched-together movie didn't make much difference.
A Type-Moon show is a Type-Moon show. Content is content.
Of course, while fans watched, they complained loudly in their hearts.
This Matou Shinji really isn't a good person!
Every time he released a project, he split it into so many versions—never giving you everything at once.
Theatrical version, director's cut, BD extended edition—all kinds of fancy labels to make you watch his story again and again.
Even this so-called "Magical Illya movie"—just for a few new shots, everyone was forced to rewatch everything they'd already seen.
This… this…
All they could say was:
As expected of you, Matou↑ Shin↓ ji↑ !!
As for all the fan outrage, Shinji's stance was very clear:
"Complain all you want—just remember to watch it! ✧(≖ ◡ ≖✿)"
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"Man, I wonder what new scenes Shinji added…"
In the Young Magus Club, Fujita hooked an arm around his buddy Shibamatsu and grinned.
"Usually these added scenes don't include many fights. Probably mostly slice-of-life stuff. I hope they add more beach scenes."
Shibamatsu jabbed a finger at Fujita's nose.
"You call that 'slice of life'? You just want to see the girls in swimsuits! You pervert!"
"Ahh~ the little cuties… If only there were some adorable boys too~ sllluuurp~"
Aoko inhaled sharply, the corner of her mouth glistening.
If there was one thing Aoko truly disliked about Magical Illya, it was that the story didn't have a single cute boy in it.
In magical-girl series like Cardcaptor Sakura or Magical Girl Lyrical Nanoha, there was always at least one boy in the main cast to balance things out.
So why did everything turn into an all-girl cast the moment it fell into Matou Shinji's hands?
The only male characters in the entire show were young men like Shirou Emiya and Issei Ryuudou—not even one actual little boy!
Alice spoke coldly, "That's because Sir Matou is trying to prevent pervy older women like you."
"Hey! Alice, don't you dare double-standard me! Your precious Sir Matou is totally into lolis—"
Smack
Aoko was sharply disciplined by Miss Kuonji.
"Don't make it sound like Sir Matou is committing a crime."
"He is though…"
Aoko puffed her cheeks, refusing to admit defeat, and turned her gaze toward the TV with a sulky huff.
The program had already started, and unless she used some advanced attention-shifting spell, Alice wasn't going to respond to her anymore.
So instead of bickering with an unresponsive Alice, she might as well watch the adorable lolis on screen.
No cute boys? Fine. Lolis were still great!
The so-called Magical Illya movie began with Rin Tohsaka and Bazett arguing over the eighth Class Card. The opening scene showed Illya, Kuro, and Miyu heading out on their seaside birthday trip.
Blue skies, white clouds, the ocean, sandy beaches, and little girls in swimsuits.
Same ingredients as the TV version, same delightful eye candy.
Unfortunately, the movie was a little too faithful to the original—Fujita's long-awaited new swimsuit shots of the girls didn't appear at all, leaving him deeply disappointed.
There were no cute boys—but Aoko still wasn't bored.
If not boys, then she still had her favorite pairing: Shirou Emiya × Issei Ryuudou!
Especially since Shinji had copied the original novel word for word, even including Illya's friend Suzuka's interview with Shirou and Issei.
The flirtatious (??) back-and-forth between the two provided endless fuel for everyone's imagination.
The girls watching from their living rooms were feasting their eyes. Scenes like that? They could watch them a hundred times without getting tired.
They even mimicked Suzuka's pose from the screen, all raising their thumbs in unison and shouting:
"Thank you, Matou Shinji!"
"Hiss—"
Shirou, who was watching the movie too, suddenly shivered.
"What's wrong?"
"I feel like… someone strange is staring at me."
Rubbing his arms, his face pale, Shirou muttered nervously.
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