I was falling from Eden.
I closed my eyes and relished the cool winds blowing over my face. The winds ran their fingers through my hair. Their gentle whispers in my ears sounded like melodies I had longed to hear for years. I felt free, as if the chains binding me to this world were burning away.
Time felt like it had slowed down, and it wasn't my doing. The wing I had left emerged of my back and I felt like I was flying properly, like old times. A smile stealthily crept on my face. I wrapped my wing around my body. I think it must have looked like a coffin from afar, but it felt like a warm hug. My painful existence would end. I sealed my lifeforce, lest it save me. And I braced for the impact, hoping the next life would be kinder to me.
I had been Judged and that's why I was falling. Before today, I had only heard of Judgement in the legends and myths, when the angels with impure hearts were banished from Eden. It was a decree passed to stop the great war. And today, it was passed to cast out a scourge from the pure lands, me.
'Mother... is this the punishment you chose for me?' My voice was loud enough to cross through the world barrier. I was sure it reached her, and I hoped for an answer.
'Talk to me!Just once... Please.'
In her eyes, what I did at Gehenna was a sin-to punish a whole race for the actions of one of them. I get that. But I was not the one who started it. I was merely the ender. One of their kind had cut off my wing. I was in pain and angry, and I let that vehement corruption take over me as I delivered my own justice. I'm sure that each of them must have done something to deserve it. That's how they all are-scum, they spread suffering and sorrow everywhere, always taking advantage of others. I was bent on eradicating that hell for good. Too bad I failed because Mother forcefully recalled me back. She has always been kind, even to those pests.
After she stopped my rampage, she went silent.I had plenty of time to reflect on my future. Maybe it was really wrong, but I am not sure if I regretted anything. Or maybe I couldn't regret anything because all that darkness was running rampant in my heart for the first time. I'm not sure. I shouldn't have allowed it. Honestly, the darkness was persistent and constantly keeping up my guard was tiring. Sometimes, I felt like that was as far as I could go by myself.
And now, the final nail was hammered, I was banished from Eden... I will never be able to see her again, or speak to her. She didn't even say goodbye.
'You're wrong, Mother. I reject your Judgement. I'll stay with you.'
I made up my mind. I'll get my eternal peace and merge with the Lifestream. So what if Mother has exiled me, she'd have to welcome me in her embrace again once I become part of Lifestream-a part of her. I allowed myself to fall. It got harder to breathe as I neared ground and picked up speed.
But then I heard a faint voice calling out for me.
"Why are you not flying?"
That voice was so familiar. My heart instantly started to beat madly after hearing that voice. It sounded so much like her-the one with the purest of hearts. But how could it possibly be? I had searched for her for nearly a decade before finally giving up on that quest. Was I hallucinating? The memories flooded my mind. I remembered the promise I once made to her. I opened my eyes to look in the direction of that voice. That presence was so bright, blinding. It could be no one else!
Of all times, I found her now, when I was most unsightly. Fate has always liked to pull my leg.
I was falling too fast and the ground was too close. I spread my wing to slow the fall physically and guide myself in her direction. I did not have enough time to completely undo the seal. It was going to hurt, bad. But I'll survive. I'll be alright. I'll have to, for my heaven was calling out to me...