"You are doing something," Ginny interrupted, shooting up from her perch on the arm of a chair. "More than anyone else I know. You're training, preparing. By the time you graduate, hell by the time summer rolls around, you'll probably be ready to go out and join the fight, stop some attacks, rescue some people. I don't think anyone in the Order is preparing as much as you. Sure they all have their jobs that they do, but are they really preparing to go to battle?
"And you're sure as hell doing more than any other student here. I admire you for what you're doing, Harry. You already almost single-handedly stopped a big attack on Hogsmeade. That's more than anyone else can say. From what you said, practically the entire Order was in Diagon Alley on Halloween and the Death Eaters still managed to do quite a bit of damage. And that's not even taking into account any aurors that might have entered into the fray.
Harry, by this time, had stopped his pacing and was just staring at his fiery friend before him. "But you have to understand one thing. You can't save everyone, and you can't fight this war all on your own. Keep training and keeping teaching the rest of us how to fight, how to defend ourselves. If you teach us half of what you can do, it'll probably save our lives. I've never seen anybody fight like you do. You're giving the rest of the students hope. You're doing everything you can right now, so don't worry too much about what you can't control."
They were silent for a long time after that as Harry processed everything Ginny had just said. She had him pegged. He had been feeling guilty and helpless. He felt like he should be out searching for Death Eaters trying to stop the attacks instead of sitting around safe and sound in the castle walls. After all, that's what he had been training for. When the attacks started, he wanted to be able to help put a stop to them.
But what could he do? He had no information. He didn't know where the next attack would be. He couldn't just wander the lands hoping to just wander across some rampaging Death Eaters. He also couldn't be out every single night hunting them down. He needed to get at least some sleep. When he had some information to go off of, he would act, but until then, there was little he could do but continue to train and teach others to defend themselves.
He finally gave her a small smile as he sunk down onto the sofa. "You're right, of course. I wish I could do more, and I feel guilty just sitting here in the safety of the castle. But without any information about where the next attack might occur, there's nothing I can do except continue to prepare. At least I was able to help out in Hogsmeade. If I saved even just one life that night, then all the work I've done thus far will have been worth it."
"Well your training already saved my life," Ginny added impishly, "So I know I'm eternally grateful for all the work you've been putting into it." She was rewarded with a grin, then promptly instructed to get back to work. She wouldn't become an animagus if she kept distracting them from her lessons.
Thursday evening finally arrived, and Harry found himself riding the circular staircase up to the Headmaster's office again. Before he could knock at the door, he was already being called in. The man always did have a bit of a flair for the dramatic. Harry opened the door and strode into the increasingly familiar office. As was becoming customary, Harry bid his Headmaster hello as he made his way to Fawkes's perch to greet the red and gold phoenix.
After exchanging pleasantries with the Headmaster as he stroked the brilliant avian plumage for a couple minutes, they jumped into their lesson. Harry was continuing to improve in his Occlumency skills. He was now able to hold his shield up against his Headmaster's piercing attacks for a period of time. Each lesson he was able to hold out longer and longer. Today he managed to fend off the mental probe for a solid three minutes before cracking. He was again able to throw the Headmaster out of his mind immediately afterwards.
Dumbledore gave him a tired smile. "You are getting quite good at this, Harry," he said genially. "It's been a long time since I've had to exert myself so much. I imagine you'll be an Occlumency master by the end of the term."
"Really?" Harry inquired curiously.
"Oh yes," the Headmaster replied, giving him a bemused smile. "You're already quite advanced. There are probably only a handful of true Occlumency masters in Great Britain. You're at a level that few have ever reached."
Harry couldn't help the smile that tugged on his lips. He still had a lot of unresolved issues with the man, but at the same time, Harry couldn't help but respect him. And to have such lavish praise heaped upon him by the Headmaster, he couldn't help but be pleased with himself. Add to that the fact that he was going against the man while right under his nose, and Harry was very smug.
But at the same time, it also made him pause. If his Occlumency was already so advanced, why did he still get the occasional vision? And why did he still feel Voldemort's emotions when they were strong enough? Not to mention his scar pains. Unable to answer his own questions, he posed them to the Headmaster.
"To be honest, I don't know," Dumbledore told him honestly. The old man gave a deep sigh before continuing. "So little is actually known about your connection and your scar, that we don't truly know the nature of it. We had assumed that your connection was similar enough to Legilimency that Occlumency would shield you from it, but apparently we were mistaken. Not that these lessons will have been a waste," Dumbledore quickly added. "Even if Voldemort manages to enter your thoughts, the skills you learn here should be helpful in hiding certain things from him and in being able to expel him from your mind."
....
Join my exclusive P@treon community for 60+ thrilling chapters!
Link: pa*treon.com/MidnightWonder (Remove the *)
If you join now you will get 2 Chapters for free as well.
Don't miss out, join now!