Summary:
Bad things happened
Dewey smiled as he held up the megaphone. "Now, I know how concerned you all are as citizens." He spoke into the machine. "But trust me when I say, it will get better."
Sure the town may have been obliterated a couple times, with aliens falling out of the sky, and monsters among people, BUT, it was his time for reelection, which meant getting people to vote for him. So Dewey needed to doll up and put in effort, and assure the people he was the perfect choice to keep enjoying life.
"Get better?! Get better how?! The town has been getting destroyed every other week!" Mr. Smiley exclaimed. "'Most of the rides in funland don't even work anymore!"
"I'm sure a little elbow grease can fix that right up!" He shouted. "After all, we managed to fix our homes, right?"
"No, no we haven't!" Barbra the mailwoman shouted. "Insurance isn't even bothering to pay for it either! They said metal rapidly flying off property and crashing down wasn't on the warranty!"
"Well…maybe you should've gotten a more specific guarantee?" He said half jokingly.
"You've gotta be kidding me." Some girl in a black dress rolled her eyes. "Is this really all we have as mayor? Some bald incompetent joke that literally has no answers that's only in office because of his family name?"
"Yeah, they have a point." One of Buck's friends, the Pizza girl, spoke outloud. "When was the last time Mayor Dewey made a good decision that helped everyone?"
"I … got rid of parking meters?"
"You mean for the cars that we no longer have because the town's been demolished a dozen times over?"
"Well ah….What about that time I brought in the world's largest bowl of ice cream? That was fun, and delicious. The whole town was happy then."
"It was … then the whole town had cavities!" Well this was already failing. But Dewey was still safe as long as nobody else tried to run for mayor.
"It seems the entire town is in agreement." Heads turned as the owner of the carwash, Greg Universe, spoke up, looking the cleanest and fanciest he's ever been. The beard was more neatly trimmed, he had a full on suit with actual shoes instead of sandals, and the long shaggy hair behind him was cut down tremendously. He actually looked like a well off emotionally stable person for once. "We need a new mayor."
"Yeah … let's vote for Nana! She's old and wise!" Well that escalated quickly.
"No, what you need is someone who understands you." Greg spoke as he went to Dewey's stage. "Like myself!"
"..." The entire town looked at each other, where Dewey could visibly see the gears turning, wondering if they were THAT desperate. "...And what makes you so qualified?"
"Because I know personally of the threat that plagues this town. I know first hand the source of all this town's problems." The usually drunken man spoke up with perfect clarity. "Ships from the sky descending, entire oceans disappearing, monsters roaming the schools and threatening your children, have you ever asked WHY this town suffers so much?"
"Terrible luck?" The black dressed girl asked.
"No, it all comes from one singular source….the group of ALIENS by the beach side known as the Crystal Gems!" He exclaimed. "They've lived by the boardwalk for years, long before any of us ever breathed our first breath. They claim to be the town defenders, but have they really done their job? Do you even know them personally? How do you know they don't plot against you as we speak!?"
"First off, I know Amethyst, we're old friends. She isn't smart enough to start a plot." Valida stated. "Second, are you one to talk, I can name a WHOLE list of problems wrong with your family!"
"Oh, you mean the problems that started when they kidnapped my son as a mere baby, and kept him away from proper care?" The man started. "He is nothing but a troublemaker now thanks to their influence, not unlike your youngest child, who regularly commits arson and robs the citizens!"
The crowd started to get riled up at that, causing Dewey to panic. "Hey now, you're not going to blame the citizens now, are you?" He asked. "That seems like a terrible thing to do." Come on, buy it …
"I actually am blaming the citizens, every one of them." …What? "We sit around and expect the police to take away criminals, we sit around and expect the government to fix our homes. Did we forget our roots as settlers? We built this town with our bare hands and chased away every problem with our own tools! So what's changed since then?!" He pointed to him. "It's because it's all being headed by an incompetent fool that clearly has none of your best interests in mind!"
The man got on the stage and took the mic from him. "This town, it doesn't need another politician that'll give you the easy answers, who'll just slap a bandage on the problem and call it a day! What it needs is someone who will take decisive action, and fight this town's problems head on!"
"YEAH!" The crowd cheered.
"Vote for me, and I promise, I will carry this town to a brighter tomorrow, and make sure that every problem we face is dealt with before it becomes a bigger issue later down the line!" The man declared boldly. "Gravesfield is a great town with a great history! Let's make more of it together!"
The town began shouting loudly … this did not bode well for Dewey in the slightest.
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Camila cried her heart out. "She's gone again!" She screamed, blowing into a tissue. "My Miha is gone again." Was it the child? Did Luz feel she'd be neglected? Was it another portal to a strange world to have fun while in danger? "I shouldn't have opened my big fat mouth! Now she's gone and she's not going to come back!"
"There there, it's going to be okay Camila." Vee patted her back as they sat down. "That's just the hormones talking."
"But what it isn't!? She has a girlfriend now, what if they decided to run off and elope to start their own family!?" Camila cried ever more, sneezing into a tissue. "I still don't know how Witches have babies, what if she gets pregnant too!?"
"Now you're exaggerating." Dr. Waybright explained while putting out some tea. "Amity has trust issues involving adults and feels like never having kids is an answer to that, so you won't have to worry about Luz getting pregnant."
"...So I won't be a grandmother?!" Okay, maybe the hormones were taking effect, but that idea still made her sad.
"If Luz survived the Boiling Isles, she can likely survive anywhere. Have faith in your children." The woman known as Garnet said to her. "They came back before, and they can do it again."
"But…but there's so much unknown about the situation. A madman is chasing them, a mad god is waiting for them back in the demon realm, the town is afraid of them…..how can they be safe anywhere?" Camila wiped her eyes.
"Hide out and hope for the best while avoiding every person in town with a new disguise every day?" … They all turned to Vee. "What, it's what I did … and do now."
"Okay, avoiding that topic for now…. I know I keep bringing this up, but I was stuck in another world years ago. There were times where we could've just stayed on earth and ended it there, but we went back to make sure everything on Amphibia was fine. And we were able to make our way back to earth again." The blonde woman went on. "I see a lot of myself and my friends in those kids. I've spent a lot of time talking to them. They're tough and resilient." Dr. Waybright told her. "They know how to get out of a scrap. You don't have to worry about them getting hurt too much."
"But…but they'll still get hurt."
"Everyone gets hurt. All you can do is mitigate that." Garnet said, ruffling Vee's head. "Sometimes children make stupid decisions, but it helps them learn from their mistakes and avoid repeating them."
"... Was that a jab at me?"
"I'm still a bit salty about the mirror incident and not telling me the truth about yourself." The afro woman smirked. "I have the ability to look into the future to achieve the best possible outcome, but even I can't avoid everything that comes my way. Sometimes I get hit with a boulder. Sometimes I get struck by lightning. But regardless of what happens, I'm always there to try again, and be a little better than the last time."
Camila … supposed that was right … no matter how much it hurts. "She … Luz is always looking for something fantastical … and I know it's going to hurt her in the end." She sighed. "But…but it's the only thing I know for sure that makes her happy."
"Luz can be headstrong, but she's also resilient." Ms. Waybright nodded. "She hasn't thought about giving up once the entire time. She's a strong girl, and that's because she has you in her life."
"I suppose so …" Camila looked at the window. "… It still hurts to watch it all crash down." She snorted. "It's funny….had I been given the chance to go into space at her age….I would've been the exact same way as her."
"That's the fun thing about being a kid … you never know where you're gonna end up." Dr Waybright stated.
"How about we take our mind off this?" Vee asked, turning on the tv.
"And in local news, political candidate, Greg Universe, has taken Gravesfield by storm."
"....What the fuck?" Camila stated, usually not one to curse, but found no other reasonable response.
"Garnet, please tell me you don't see him winning in the future." Vee asked.
"... Sasha, I suggest getting your friends on this."
"Again…what the fuck?" Camila repeated.
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Connie paced back and forth. "Alright. Vee can't be in the open, and the gems are doing their best to avoid the local police, meaning it's up to the four of us to deal with the situation at hand." She told the group.
Normally Connie didn't get involved in politics unless it was for research for her future as the president of the united states … but when it came to GREG as a candidate, she had to do her best to help the opposition. Who knew what that bastard would do if he had real power?
Unfortunately, because Luz and everyone else had mysteriously vanished without a trace, she was a bit on the dry side when it came to help. "Ah, don't you mean five?" Masha raised their hand.
"Dewey has no workable skills, at this point he's more of a face we're supporting than a person who can contribute to the problem." Connie explained. As much as she had beef against Masha, they both agreed Vee did not need to deal with this.
"I'm right here." The man in question pouted.
"We know and we don't care." Connie countered. "And in spite of my various hours of research, I'll be the first to admit that I am just a kid and I know that in real life, this requires actual experience other than dressing up the problem, so that's where you two come in." She pointed to Dr. Waybright's friends, Anne and Marcy.
"Don't worry. I helped a frog get a hundred percent of the votes in his town, so this will be a piece of cake." Anne grinned. "We just need to work on what you say in public at all times."
"And as someone who was once in a monarchy, I memorized all Gravesfield laws." Marcy smiled as she flipped through books. "Did you know that it's apparently still legal to burn witches?"
"Wait what?" Masha's eyes widened.
"Old law that never got taken out because they stopped believing in them, so they didn't think it was relevant to remove." The black haired woman shrugged. "Just like how in Gravity Falls, Oregon, it's still legal to marry woodpeckers."
"...Why would that be legal at all?" Connie asked.
"Strange things … anyway, only people who have lived here for five years or longer can run for mayor, so it's literally up to us making Dewey look good."
"Is that even possible? He's drowning in a pool of his own sweat right now." Masha pointed to the man standing in a corner. "That and I think he's breaking out into stress hives."
"I have HIVES!?" The man screamed, scratching his body until he fell to the ground.
"... Sadly, I asked around." Connie sighed. "He's the only one willing to actually run against Greg." Who for some reason was really good at speaking to the people. "So the question is, how can we make this." She gestured to the flailing man. "Into a worthy political candidate?"
"I've worked with worse. Hop Pop was a sweaty, wrinkly, old frog man, this is essentially the same thing…except with less warts." Anne shook her head. "So let's start simple, what are your strengths?"
Dewey stood up, dusting himself off. "I enjoy making people happy."
"Okay, good start…any reasons why you do?" Marcy went on.
"I..I want people to like me so I have some sense of self worth."
"Too honest….and you should probably get a therapist." Masha sighed. "Any skills?"
"I … have a good memory." The man smiled. "It's essential when you're counting taxes and memorizing voters."
"Don't be so blatantly obvious about your need to kiss everyone's butt for personal gain." Connie grumbled. "Let's start with some simple debate questions. Name one thing you can do to improve the livelihood of your citizens."
"Free Pizza!"
"...And how would you pay for that pizza?" Marcy asked. "Money has to come from somewhere, and Kofi's family isn't going to do it for free."
"Well then we take a bit from tax dollars."
"The tax dollars needed to fix the housing, fund the police and fire departments, and the education system?"
"Lady, the housing costs in the last month alone cost more than all the tax money I earn in a year." He said. "If it was up to me, I'd walk up to the problematic people causing this, and politely, but firmly, tell them to stop."
"...How have you been in office for this long?" Anne asked.
"Lack of other willing candidates." Dewey answered. "Seriously, Greg Universe campaigning is just so out of left field. I saw him sleeping inside of a dumpster two months ago, and suddenly he can afford a tie and shoes? That's just so messed up."
"Absolutely … which is why Masha is going to spy on him." She turned to them. "I know it's going to be tough, but we have to figure out where he got … this new attitude from." It really didn't make sense. "He's an unambitious bum. You don't just suddenly wake up sober and competent enough to run for office."
"Oh, so we're doing smear campaigns?" Masha smirked. "Nice. Can't build our candidate up, so we'll tear the other one down." They began walking away. "Don't worry Mahaswaren, you can reward me when all is said and done." … Desperate times.
"Don't worry! I've spied on several rebellions and coups in Amphibia during my time as a ranger….now that I think of it, I probably should've let them continue in hindsight since it was against Adrias, but hindsight and all that." Marcy chuckled.
"Which leaves you and me dealing with Dewey …" Anne sighed. "Come on, let's try to write him up a good speech."
"No need, I have the perfect one memorized already. I even have my own slogan ready!" The man spoke boldly. "Bill Dewey will DEW- this town right!"
"....Any chance we can find a last minute candidate?" Connie asked. "I'd just get Vee to replace him, but I can't take the risk Belos might be nearby."
"Out of the limited time I've been here, I'd go for Nana Pizza, but she's apparently busy." Anne shrugged. "Come on, let's beat some sense into him."
"... You mean teach some sense, right?" Dewey asked nervously.
"If you prefer it worded like that." Anne picked up a lead pipe. "..Why have I been picking up so many lead pipes in this town? This place has very dangerous litter."
"Spare pipes for when workers need it." Dewey shrugged … they were doomed.
=======================================================================
Belos watched with glee as the people stood in awe … for him … Do you mind keeping the conversations down when we're doing this? I'm gonna need focus. I'm the one providing you with what to say. If we followed your lead, we'd be on that stage after an hour of intoxicating drinks. Don't think for a second you're doing this by yourself. I was talking more about thing one and thing two.
I am still of superior intelligence to you, Gregory Universe, even if my species is inferior. Don't interfere with the Emperor's plan or you will face consequences.
Yes, it seemed with his last encounter with Lucifer Clawthorne and his crazed, manic, highly animated psychotic gem companion, the weapon, while weakening him immensely to the point where absorbing the green one almost didn't matter, thus requiring the human host, it seemed to have mentally regressed the two gems within Belos's mind. They had no recollection of their previous lives, or moreover, their animosity and hatred of him.
Philip was never one to not look at a silver lining. Thus, he quickly appointed himself as their commander, teaching them the true enemies of the world … witches. It was pretty much just like an indoctrinated Hunter, only more loyal. So no more headaches there. Combined with the hatred from his new host of Clawthorna and Luz's family, this was the most well put together body he had had in a while….though admittedly he wished this 'Greg Universe' would've been less portly built.
"Bill Dewey will now give his speech!" The love over the people was all but assured in this new persona he acquired. While Greg Universe's reputation was not one of good measure, he was, for all intents and purposes, a blank slate. A free to use puppet that he could easily move and control to his whim. This fraud that was the ancestor to his late companion was of no threat whatsoever.
"People of Gravesfield, I have come to you talk about … the problems that we face." Mostly because they had the same skill set as the man, if the note cards and earpiece was anything to go by. "Now, I know that many of you are concerned from the constant destruction and attacks that plague our town."
"No shit sherlock!" Mr. Smiley yelled as the crowd murmured.
"Mr Smiley, I understand your rage, but please be aware there are children present." Philip spoke through Greg. "I suggest you watch the language you speak. We're working to be better together, and we must all do our part, even through the tiniest details."
"I um … you have a point there, Greg." The man backed down. Wow, it wasn't even your turn and you still got more people supporting you. A good leader knows when and what to speak at the right time. You can't just yell randomly.
"Well…anyways…I ah….have….ideas for…dealing with the destruction." His opponent kept going on. "A fundraiser event to help pay for the damages … after all, we're a town with a lot to offer …"
"A fundraiser you say…you wish to dress up the problem by offering flatteries to the masses." Philip spoke up. "That helps in the short term…but it still doesn't solve the problem at the source. You know by now, this whole town knows that it faces calamity on a nearly weekly basis. What about the next time, and the next , and the next?"
"I …" The man pressed the ear piece, likely desperate for an answer his mind was incapable of producing. "We can work on fixing our houses to be more durable. Rubber installation in the core to handle earthquakes and lightning better, stronger fixtures that won't fly off when things crash into them. Heck, it might be our fault we didn't take tidal waves into account when living on the ocean front." The girl was clever … but not enough.
"So you say. Those sound like good ideas….why haven't you brought them up before?" Philip pressed on. "You've been the mayor of this town for over a decade now? It's easy to come up with solutions to problems when they've already passed. Where was the initiative, where was that drive to improve the town before the destruction came?"
The man pressed the earpiece again. "W-well…where was yours? You've spent over twenty years living in this town, and you've never taken any initiative yourself? Why are you only now taking an interest in the place you live in?"
"Because I actually see the problem, and for once, the people are finally willing to listen for answers." He turned to them. "What say you all? A temporary defense to hold out for the next bit of destruction, or an offense to stop every problem at its source?" He spoke out to the crowd. "You, Gravesfield, have the power! You can choose not to be scared, to face the monsters that plague us in life head on! We've fought witches before, why not aliens!?"
"So what you're saying is that you want us to rally like an old timey mob with torches and pitchforks?" That androgynous girl that helped number five escape at the school questioned. "Isn't that pretty outdated?"
"People, just a decade or two ago, seemed to think that hands from the sky and snakes shapeshifting among us seemed silly … what say you now?"It was a bit of a hassle to avoid the two females trying to search through his belongings, but in the end, all worked out for him. With the green one's intelligence, nothing needed to be written down after all. "The times we live in are unorthodox and unexpected, but that is why we can't afford to hesitate when the threat is right in front of us. For your future, for the safety of your homes, your mothers, brothers, children, do it for them. For your families." As Philip did everyday on his crusade.
All at once, the crowd began cheering … sometimes, violence was what motivated a person deep down … glad to see humanity hasn't lost its spirit. Philip turned to his competitor, putting a hand on the mic. "I suggest you leave now … unless you have any final words?"
"I….I…" Dewey looked to the crowd, the devastation and despair of defeat being clear as day on him. "..I resign my position. I'm dropping out of the race."
He began walking away … victory at its finest.
=======================================================================
Luz gasped as she landed on the ground. "Air … normal, non polluted air …" So refreshing.
"No more demons….no more hypersexual deviants and lewdness everywhere!" Amity shouted, jumping in joy.
"Back to normal, mundane life." Lucci muttered in disappointment. "That was the most fun I had in months…and now it's gone far too soon."
"Don't worry Lucci." Willow patted him on the back. "You'll go back there eventually if we can work out the whole immortal thing."
"Thanks Willow." Luz really shouldn't be surprised by this. "So Hunter, you gonna miss your Mom and Dad?"
"Huh?" The kid himself looked like he was just finally getting out of it. "Oh…yeah….That was the first time I've ever been hugged by a maternal figure….it felt so warm." He turned to Lucci and Luz. "Is that how you guys feel about Eda and Camila?"
"That's how all kids fee; about parents in general." Gus smiled, patting the kid on the back. "… Except Amity."
"All adults can go to hell for Lucci to torment." Looks like Amity wasn't going to let up on that anytime soon. "..Although Asmodeus was very nice to be around."
"Cherri was the bomb." Boscha nodded. "… Are we forgetting something?"
"Don't think so? Amity, you still have Spinel's gem?" Lucci asked the girl, who nodded, tossing the rock itself. "No, I think everything's alrig-"
Thump
"Waaaaagh!" The pale body of Pearl collided with Lucci, making them stumbled into the ground.
"...I was half hoping she stayed in hell." Lucci groaned.
"Wouldn't you be stuck with her for eternity?" Luz asked.
"That's why I said half hopping." Lucci rolled his eyes, grabbing the girl by the nose.. "Now if you don't mind, I'm going to drag her away and shatter her away from the magic portal door."
"No, wait, Lucifer! I get it now, I get it now! I won't interfere with your attempts to go home anymore!" Pearl tried to speak up.
"Yeah no, you lost my trust when you made Luz suicidal. You lost my faith in redemption when you went back in time to undo Mom finding me. You lost your right to exist the moment we learned you pinned the door breaking on the Centipedes." He reiterated, grabbing the gem's arm. "For once, I'm nipping a problem in the bud."
"Please, anyone, please, I've changed, I've-"
"Do you really think any of us have any pity for you now?" Hunter spoke up. "You've been constantly getting in the way ever since we came here. At least Boscha and I have tried to be better people. You, everytime we give you slack, you go back and make us regret everything. There's no sympathy for you here."
"Yeah, believe me when I say there is nothing in this universe that'll stop me from finishing the job." Lucci raised his hand.
"We need Pearl unshattered." Garnet spoke up as she walked into the clearing.
"I repeat, nothing."
"Greg is mayor."
"...Boxy haired fusion lady say what?" Luz bluntly said outloud.
"Greg Universe is the new mayor of Gravesfield." She continued. "And he issued martial law against non-humans."
"...HOW THE FUCK DID THAT HAPPEN!?" Amity exclaimed. "We were only gone for like, two and a half days!"
Garnet stared at them blankly "You were gone for a week."
"A week?!" Willow shouted. "But in Hell…that…but…"
Luz groaned. "Time dilation! One year inside is one day outside kind of stuff! We're lucky the Boiling Isles and Earth match us as it is!"
"Guess that explains why the sands of time are important for the portal door." Gus groaned. "If we weren't careful, we might've been gone for a year."
Lucci sighed. "Son of a bitch. We can't catch a break." Lucci kicked a clump of dirt out of the ground. "I wish I was back in Hell."
"… What did I miss?" The fusion asked in bafflement.
"So, very much Garnet." Pearl explained, getting up. "So Muc-"
Creak
Everyone paused as they saw Garnet punch a hole right through Pearl's chest. "I know you sabotaged their portal door. From now on, you leave those kids alone, or else. Got it?"
"… Yep-"
Poof
They watched as the gem fell to the ground. "… I thought you said we needed her?" Luz asked.
"She'll reform shortly. Sapphire really wanted to get at least one punch in." Garnet grunted. "Now you should hurry along. Your mom is worried sick, and we don't have much time to stay in one spot."