We landed in a different place, Janus let us down with her wing softly pressed against me. I looked around, noticing that we were on a hill overlooking a waterfall. This must have been the waterfall we saw when the creature came. I looked up to Janus, tilting my head. "Do you want to stay here?"
She smiled, "I was gonna ask you that."
"I thought I should ask first," I giggled, glancing down at the waterfall. Some of the mist sprayed onto the rocks below. The hill was much taller than it appeared from the ground.
"Don't be reckless." She gently placed a hand on my shoulder, her eyes stern yet holding a bit of humor behind them.
I turned to face the goddess, while Casper, the pitbull, lay on the grassy ground with his wings spread out. My wings remained tightly secured against my sides, and my feet dangled over the edge of the hill. Janus had her gaze locked onto mine, and the smirk on my face made her chuckle and shake her head.
She must have sensed my intentions. Just as my foot left the ground, her wing swiftly extended, and I fell right into its embrace. The strength in those wings must be incredible, as she effortlessly held my entire weight, just above the long drop below. As she walked, her wing curved gently around me, and I couldn't help but curl my fingers around her feathers, mesmerized by their silky texture.
"You are brave." She shook her head, "but sometimes troublesome. Are you doing this to scare me, perhaps?"
"A goddess can be scared?" I relaxed, knowing her wing could hold me.
Janus chuckled, her eye squinting with the movement. "Of course we can. We are like you, angels, cupids, and creatures. We feel fear."
"Then can you also feel…" I paused for a moment, a sudden rush of confidence welling up inside me. I grabbed hold of her shoulders, and as my wings sprouted out, I flew us down from the cliff. Just as I had expected, Janus was beneath me, my hands firmly on her chest while her wings spread wide to catch us. I let my wings flap freely, allowing the wind to lift us away from the water below. Janus sighed, her hand resting around my waist as her eyes met mine. "-Exhilaration?"
She responded with a chuckle, her shoulders sagging. The goddess let her wings open wider, flying us higher and higher before she spread them open to catch and glide in the air. "Do I?" Her voice was soft, her body just as smooth. Without finishing, the goddess closed her eyes.
I looked up to her, not expecting her to drop her wings on us. I quickly ducked and wrapped my arms around her neck, and we both fell back down. Janus cupped her wings around us, tightly curling our bodies together. She twirled around, quickly flipping so that I ended up underneath her. I opened my eyes just as her wings spread wide to catch us. My face was only inches from the water, feeling the mist spray against my hair and face.
Janus wrapped her hand around my hips, holding me close to her while my wings were pressed into her chest. Her broad wings glided us down the river banks while the water sprayed at us. I laughed, opening my arms to swim just above the water. It was calm, gentle, and cooling against my skin.
The goddess swiftly turned us around, lifting my body onto hers while her wings remained spread just beneath us. Without needing to look, she effortlessly kept us afloat just above the water. Her yellow, glowing eyes were locked onto mine, and her smile was wide and graceful.
"Do I, my dear?"
I could only chuckle. The breeze was blowing through my hair, and the water was catching my feet that lay upon the goddess's larger body. I closed my arms around her neck, pulling my face into her as close as I could.
Janus held me back, her comforting embrace enveloping me completely. She spread her wings and lifted off the ground, carrying me away from the water. I didn't mind where she was taking me; I was absorbed in the feel of her wings against my bare back and the gentle touch of her slender fingers running through my hair.
Her wings opened back up, welcoming in the fresh air as she landed on the hill we once were. I stayed close to her, my body pressed into her own. Just the sound of her fluttering wings, the spray of my own fluffed-up feathers, and the birds in the trees…
"Huh?" I suddenly looked up, catching the sound of tweeting and chirping.
Janus caught on; her wings opened up, and it was bright once again. I looked up to her, tilting my head at the noise. "Those are birds. You recognize them?"
"I do…" I reluctantly moved away from her, looking at nearby birch trees that were imitating the sound. "Birds.."
Janus giggled, extending her hand while whistling in a nearby direction. I flinched as a small, fast-moving creature came rushing out. I held onto the goddess just as a little bluebird with a fluffy chest landed on her finger. Slowly, I turned to gaze at the creature in front of me, smiling at the small bird.
"This is a bluebird." Janus slowly said. I looked up to her, my head pressed against her chest as I did so.
I slowly looked back in front of us, putting my own fringe out in front of the small bird. "It's beautiful. The blue colors kind of give it away," I chuckled.
Janus nodded and gently moved her finger to mine, allowing the bird to jump from her hand to my own. I watched the bird, captivated by its beautiful colors and bright, all-white eyes. Leaves sprouted from under its wings, and its long, draping tail resembled whiskers as it hung over my wrist. "I'm guessing the Mother Goddess had help creating it?" I asked.
"Of course," Janus rubbed a hand on my head, brushing my hair back, and I melted in her touch. "The beings here are very creative."
I laughed, "and weird." I motioned to the weird tail, the goddess only chuckled, ruffling my hair. The bird flew back off into the trees, fluttering away with a few other bluebirds joining them.
I sat down slowly, and Casper was still there beside me. He maneuvered his way between me and the goddess, receiving belly rubs from both of us while I rested my head on her shoulder. She allowed me to do so, leaning her head against mine.
We sat like that in silence for a while. Janus hummed quietly for the most part while Casper purred to her touch.
It soon faded away when Janus stopped humming. She let out a sigh, and I stiffened at the change.
"You had another one of those memories?"
I should have anticipated that Janus had already demonstrated her ability to follow me and keep an eye on my actions numerous times. So, all I could do was nod in acknowledgment. She placed her hand gently over mine as it rested in my lap.
"I don't know... I like it when you do that. I told you how it is bad and how it hurts you."
I nodded against her, biting my lip to hide the trembling in my wings. Janus gave my back a rub, squeezing around my fingers in a tight yet comforting hold. "Please… Don't let it hurt you, don't let them in."
I sighed, "I.. can't help it sometimes, Janus." I looked up at her, the swishing of her hair over her shoulder catching my eyes. "I want to know. Even if it hurts me, I can handle the pain. I trained, and I know I can handle it."
"No, you can't."
A sudden gust of air pushed me forward, causing me to flinch. Janus had her arm around my waist, preventing me from tumbling out of her lap. With slight pressure on my hips, I gradually relaxed back against her. My eyes slowly closed as a wave of drowsiness washed over me.
Janus combed her fingers through my hair, gently tossing it from my face, all the way back down to my neck in a soothing motion. "You will not be able to handle this pain. It is more than you, my darling."
"I.."
I gulped, my mouth feeling dry and my body completely sagging in the goddess's lap.
Janus wrapped her arm around my hips to hold me steady, preventing me from falling over her. She continued to run her fingers through my hair, gently gliding them along my scalp as I gradually allowed myself to lean my full weight against her. My mind began to swirl, drifting to different places that dulled the sounds and sensations around me.
"But of course.. I guess I won't be able to handle it either."
"Handle.. what…?"
"Losing you."
I let my head drop just as she finished speaking. Naturally, she caught me before I could fall over, but her strong, comforting hold quickly became a way to dangle me from above. I found myself drifting in the open air, unable to grab onto anything for support. Realizing I couldn't steady myself, I surrendered and curled into a ball, trying to protect myself from the inevitable fall.
Well, what I expected was a fall, which was nothing more than a slow, drifting fall on a journey. Seconds went by until the numbness forced my eyes back open, and I was greeted by the everlasting darkness.
My body sank forward as I released my legs. I lay on my back, supported by nothing beneath me. I allowed it to happen because I felt safe in this moment. Janus was here. I could still sense the rhythm of her wings, the soft, comforting scent around me, and her gentle body enveloping me with a promise of safety.
I was focusing on it, holding onto the feeling of her so close to me with such promises. So when I felt the slow fading pull from her end, I stirred and tried to grapple my way to a standing balance.
Her warmth. Her soft hands. Her safety…
It was fading away, and the darkness that once felt so safe was suddenly far away.
It suddenly felt like something was grasping at me, pulling me away from her in a desperate attempt to shield me from the cool gaze that moved past. I tried to resist this time, aware that if I wanted her to stay with me, I needed her to be with me, even if I wasn't fully present in that moment.
Even my own voice couldn't work.
All I could do was thrash, pull, and get tugged back until finally I broke free and reached out for her.
My eyes opened, and I was blinded by the sudden shuddering of the sun. The distant voice of familiar angels, the familiar sound of fluttering wings, and the spray of feathers from my own wings. I had thrashed so much in my sleep that my wings had reacted in the same display.
Casper sat a bit of feet away from me, his eyes low at me like I had insulted the pup. I sat up, wincing slightly at the sting that came from my left wing. I stretched it out, putting my hand up to Casper so he could sniff me.
He did so, his eyes still slightly warring with mine. I gave him a smile. "It's okay, come here."
His eyes lit up, the swish of his tail telling me that he forgave whatever I had done.
I probably hit him with my wing, which is why it hurt so much.
He sat in my lap, licking my head and cheeks in appreciation. I stretched my neck in response and nodded at him before I began to survey my surroundings. I was still perched on the hill overlooking the waterfall. I knew Janus was already gone, but that knowledge made my body sag with disappointment.
She often left as soon as I woke up from a dream. Although, it didn't feel much like a dream to me. I realized it was a safe place, one where Janus would put me when she was nearby while I slept. I couldn't help but wonder how I had suddenly fallen asleep with Janus so close to me.
Maybe I was just exhausted?
I shrugged to myself, the distant voices becoming louder and much clearer to my ears. I tucked my wings to my back, rolling over onto my chest to look out below on the ledge. Casper soon found his way on top of my back, his legs spread so he didn't crush my wings.
Seth, Bridget, and Rory came in from the trees. They talked with one another about the spot we had visited the last time, and they were turning in the direction where we had seen the little pine marten.
I smirked to myself, curling my wings slightly on Casper, who sprayed his own to cover mine.
Unable to help myself, I waved my arm around in the air and called out to them.
"Took you guys long enough!"
All three heads turned up to me, their faces lighting up as they jumped into the air and rushed towards me. I flipped onto my back, sending Casper off of me just as the tree landed and greeted me with their usual chorus of voices overlapping one another.
Rory was the loudest. "Well aren't you early? That doesn't mean we were slow!"
"Surreee." I rolled my eyes at them, making the redhead slump down with crossed legs, falling onto my chest to try and knock me in the head with their wings. I ducked, sticking my tongue out to those who gave an exasperated gasp.
"Shouldn't we go and look for that stag you wanted to see?" Seth suddenly asked aloud, looking down at me and Rory, who were on the ground.
I looked down at the waterfall. "Eh.. it's okay if we just stay here. I don't care if we find it or not."
The others fell silent for a moment. Out of the corner of my eye, I noticed Bridget and Seth exchanging an anxious glance. However, Rory didn't seem to care. They were lying on their backs, with Casper perched on their chests, giving the puppy a good rub on his chest. They were saying all sorts of things like, "Who's a good boy?" and "Yes, you're a good boy!"
I decided to ignore the looks both Bridget and Seth tossed my way. I didn't understand the concern in their glances, so I didn't bother to think about it. The others began to chat once again, but my mind and eyes were elsewhere.
"Vienna?"
"Huh?" I turned to Bridget, who was sitting down along with Seth in a mini circle we made around Rory and Casper.
Bridget coughed slightly. "Are you okay? You've been quiet every time we met up together, not really talking that much."
I gulped, shrugging my shoulders at her, "I'm fine." I gave a slight snicker, "just because someone doesn't talk with everyone doesn't mean something's wrong with them."
Bridget let out a small, nervous chuckle as she turned around and nudged Seth, who was lost in thought. Startled by her touch, he opened his arms wide and began to fall forward. He landed on Rory, his wings spread wide in a frantic attempt to catch himself.
Rory welcomed the "hug" from the blonde boy. They ruffled his hair, snaking another arm down onto his back to keep him pressed on top of them.
"Could have asked for a hug, Seth." They said nonchalantly, though a hint of red blushed their cheeks.
Seth grumbled and to my surprise, he sank into the other angels touch. He lay on top of them, huffing out insults that fell on deaf ears from all of us, with his face pressed into Rory's neck.
"Get a room," I laughed out, leaning my hands back to hold my weight up.
Seth glared at me from his concealed position, while Rory laughed and wrapped his legs around the blonde boy, effectively trapping him completely. Despite Rory's mocking attitude towards me, Seth allowed them him to do so.
While the two flirted in their weird way, I turned my eyes to Bridget. She was rolling her eyes at the two's display before she found my eyes with her own.
I smirked. "See, I can talk."
Bridget flashed a grin, a hint of irritation evident in the flutter of her wings.