After finding out he has to go on a mission, Leon walks over to the couches and slumps down into the seat.
"How the hell did I even get into this situation? My luck has to be cursed, or some weird voodoo shit has to be involved," Leon complains, kicking his feet in frustration.
"Well, that's very mature of you," Raven comments from behind her monitor.
"Shut up! You wouldn't understand. I don't belong here! Like the rest of you! I don't belong with you freaks of nature! Like—who the hell hears an explosion upstairs and has no reaction?"
"Well, if we're being technical, I did react. It's just my reaction wasn't crying and squealing like a foolish child," Raven replies.
"Yeah, that's so much better," Leon mutters, rolling his eyes.
He stares down at his lap, silence growing as his thoughts spiral. Suddenly, a familiar voice echoes in his mind.
"If you are as innocent as you say… I suggest you kill yourself now."
Leon clenches his fist, trembling.
I seriously don't want to figure out what Larry meant by that. Just thinking about everything that could go wrong tomorrow makes me sick… It can't be worse than that time in grade school when I cut myself with safety scissors. Oh man, worst 2 minutes of my life.
Raven watches him fidget and chew his fingernails.
"I'm going to regret letting him on the mission," she mumbles. "Oh well. Wouldn't be the first time someone died on their first mission. The leader can deal with it when he returns."
"Hey! You know I can still hear you, right? Do you always say scary stuff like that out loud?" Leon shouts, annoyed.
"Do you always ask this many questions?" Raven says dryly. "I just state the facts. No time to sugarcoat reality to protect your fragile emotions or mask your obvious incompetence."
Raven glances back at him and sees him staring.
"No, but like—seriously, why are you dressed like a damn mummy?" Leon asks awkwardly.
Raven sighs loudly and rolls her eyes.
"I'm extremely allergic to the sun, pollen, too much oxygen, water, nearly every fabric type, and human skin oils. All of it gets absorbed through contact. So yes, I have to wear bandages. Also, my skin is so sensitive a warm summer breeze could bruise me."
"Any more questions?"
The room falls silent as Leon's jaw drops.
"Uhh… so you said you're allergic to fabric. Does that mean..."
"Yes, I'm naked under the bandages. And we're leaving it at that."
"Damn… so you were just nerfed at birth," Leon says, stunned.
"I'm very aware I am not God's favorite. But hey, I guess I'm in the right squad, huh?"
Suddenly, the doors upstairs burst open, and Axel walks down wearing a black suit, holding two more suits in his arms.
"Alright, kid! I think I guessed your size! So—what color suit you want? Brown or black!"
"Ugh, great. And here's this guy," Leon mutters under his breath.
***
The very next day, Leon and Axel traveled to Burlington, Vermont, by taking two different trains. At the train station, Axel and Leon hop off at the west side of the city.
"Do I have to jump into my first mission so fast? I don't even know the first thing about this squad! Actually—scratch that—I don't even think I belong in this squad!"
As Leon whines, he follows Axel out of the train station.
"Kid, trust me when I say this—nobody in this squad was out in here by mistake. There's a reason you're here, even if you're a little too bitchy for my taste. You've been complaining the whole trip—put a damn cork in it!" Axel shouts.
"But you don't understand! I have a family back home! I can't be trapped here in the States gaining enemies for no reason!" Leon yells, hopping up and down with tears in his eyes.
He continues complaining as they walk through the city, trailing behind Axel until they finally reach their destination.
"Please, Axel, have mercy! I'm not ready for a mission! I just met you yesterday! Can't we do some team bonding or something? Yeah, that sounds great—we could go back to base and play Uno. Or Connect 4! Ooo, I have a great show we could watch, it's called Oshi no Ko! I just started it, and I'm loving it!"
"Holy fuck. Do you ever shut up?!" Axel spins around and grabs Leon by the shoulders. "Look, kid. I don't mind your yapping—you're actually kind of entertaining. But this is a mission. So lock in. I want you to forget your family, your friends, and all that other bullshit. And just remember these three words until the job's done:
Fuck love.Fuck humanity. Finish the mission. No matter what."
The second Leon hears Axel's words, he flinches, sweat trickling down his temple.
"What does that even mean?" he asks nervously.
"It's Squad Bastards' code. The Three Big Fs. Only rules we follow. Engrave them into your damn soul—because once the mission starts, those are the only things that matter," Axel says, dead serious.
"But... but... I still don't get it. The rules are too vague, dummkopf!"
"Trust me. If you survive a few missions, you'll get it in no time."
With his arms still around Leon's shoulder, Axel turns them both to face a small high school in the distance.
"This is where we start your first mission."