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Chapter 181 - Chapter 179 - I didn't want to feel anything anymore

Power, by itself, was never enough.

Kings built empires only to watch them crumble. Gods created entire worlds only to see them collapse. Invincible warriors fell not for lack of strength, but because strength never stopped the inevitable.

Power can split mountains, divide oceans. It can subdue armies and make stars collapse. But it cannot protect everything. It cannot save everyone.

In the end, no matter how invincible someone is, there will always be something that slips away, someone who is lost.

And that was the tragedy of the invincible.

Absolute power is a prison.

For the weak, it is an unattainable promise. For the strong, an inevitable burden. And for those at the top, alone above the world, it is a curse.

Ikki always knew this. He existed in a space where no one else could reach, where his strength made him untouchable. He could shape the world to his will, crush gods like ants. His power had no limits.

And yet, he was unable to save those who truly mattered.

That was the fate of the invincible: to watch the world follow its course, to see the weak break, to feel life slip through their fingers, even when their hands were strong enough to hold the very heavens.

He had never been defeated. Never been surpassed. But how many times had he failed? How many times had his eyes witnessed the death of those who trusted him?

His mother...

Silena. Grover. Hundreds of campers.

How many more?

The truth was simple, cruel, and unchangeable: no matter how powerful he was, he always arrived too late.

Ikki couldn't say how many times he had felt this pain.

It was an invisible wound, but always open, throbbing somewhere deep within him. The feeling of being untouchable and, at the same time, powerless. Of possessing overwhelming power and, even so, never being enough.

The rain kept falling, soaking his clothes, mingling with the dried blood on his clenched fists. He walked in silence, each step heavy as lead, sinking into the mud that stretched across the Camp.

The Zeus Cabin loomed before him, imposing and solitary as always.

Ikki pushed the door open, stepping into the dark, empty space.

After closing the door behind him, he stood there, motionless.

His fingers trembled slightly before clenching even tighter.

The wooden floor creaked under the pressure.

"Weak..." The word echoed in his mind like a slow poison.

He was powerful, without a doubt...

But for those who mattered?

He was just a failure.

Ikki took a deep breath.

He wanted to stop feeling.

He wanted the pain to disappear, for this suffocating agony to dissipate like mist at dawn. But no matter how much he tried to bury it all, the truth remained there, sharp as a blade pressed against his throat.

He had failed.

Failed his mother.

Failed Silena. Failed Grover. Failed all those who needed him.

His fists clenched tighter. The physical pain was a welcome relief.

Thunder roared outside, illuminating the cabin for a brief moment. His shadow stretched across the walls, the silhouette of someone who should have been a god, but in the end was nothing more than a broken boy.

He hated himself for still caring.

He cared when he shouldn't. He cared about those he could never save.

If he felt nothing, nothing could hurt him.

It was simple.

The rain drummed on the roof of the Zeus Cabin, a monotonous, distant sound.

He closed his eyes and let himself sink into the darkness of his own mind.

Everything would have been different.

If he hadn't made that decision.

If he hadn't chosen to follow that path.

The moment he decided to bring his mother back was the instant everything changed. It no longer mattered what was right or wrong, good or bad. He needed to bring her back.

He did what needed to be done.

The Egyptian gods… they were just the first step.

He spent five months in isolation, sitting in a frozen cave.

Refining his divinity.

Understanding the laws of the universe.

Five months where nothing existed but him and the distant echo of a promise he made when he lost her...

But what if he hadn't done it?

If he had stayed? If he had fought alongside them? If he had been the friend Percy and the others needed?

Would Silena have survived?

Would Grover still be alive?

The campers… the Camp… would it all have been different?

The answer was as simple as it was painful.

He would never know.

Because, in the end, he wasn't there.

Ikki opened his eyes. The electricity in his irises sparked, a cold, empty glow.

At this point, it no longer mattered.

He had already chosen his path. And there was no turning back.

Ikki took a deep breath, letting the emotion dissipate like smoke in the wind.

He thought about Percy's words about Luke and Kronos waiting for him in Russia.

He couldn't afford to act impulsively.

Kronos calling him directly? That was a risk. The Titan of Time was meticulous; every move he made had a greater purpose. If he wanted to lure him to Mount Elbrus, there was something more behind it.

He needed to analyze it coldly.

If it was a trap to kill him, what could Kronos have that would make it viable? Ikki wasn't arrogant enough to consider himself untouchable, but there was nothing in the Titan's arsenal that posed a real threat. Not even an army of monsters could hold him for more than a few moments.

So, what was the real goal?

Distraction.

Kronos didn't need to defeat him. He just needed to keep him away.

Camp Half-Blood was in mourning, and few demigods had survived the fight. Olympus was still at war with the Slavs. If Ikki went after the Titan and took too long to return, what could happen here?

Another attack? Another assault while the demigods were still weakened?

Ikki let out a long sigh.

The logic was clear. Kronos wanted to draw him away. Whether it was a trap or a distraction, he shouldn't take the bait so easily.

But even so… he would go.

Still… not now.

His eyes wandered through the empty cabin.

There was something he needed to do first.

The shroud-burning would take place at dawn. A farewell for those who died fighting, for those the Camp had lost.

For Silena. For Grover. For the campers whose faces he might not even know, but who were still part of it all.

They deserved his presence.

Russia could wait.

He would stay for the funeral.

...

The sky was still dark when the first demigods began to gather at the top of the hill.

The morning mist covered the ground like a silent veil, and the smell of burning wood hung in the air. In the center of the clearing, the funeral pyres stood, one for each name now part of Camp Half-Blood's history.

Ikki stood before them. He wore black from head to toe, but it wasn't the color that set him apart—it was the way he stood motionless.

At his side, Annabeth had her arms crossed, her chin trembling. Her gray eyes avoided lingering on anyone for too long. Sadie kept her hands hidden in her jacket pockets, her gaze fixed on the ground, biting her lip as if fighting not to say something. Zia stood on the other side, her posture rigid, but Ikki noticed the way her fingers trembled when the wind blew. None of the three said anything. They were just there, close enough for him to know he wasn't alone, even if he felt otherwise.

Percy approached silently, carrying a lit torch. His green eyes were red, and there was something in his expression Ikki rarely saw: uncertainty.

"We start when you're ready…" he said, offering the torch.

Ikki took the fire carefully.

Clarisse stood beside Chiron, both silent. The daughter of Ares had a face streaked with soot and dried blood; she hadn't cried, but it was impossible not to see the sadness in her slumped shoulders. Carter and Walt were a little farther off, watching everything in silence. Walt held an Egyptian necklace between his fingers, murmuring prayers in Demotic. Carter stood still, like a shadow, his eyes fixed on the pyres.

The rest of the campers were all silent.

When Ikki took the first step, everything fell quiet. Even the crickets stopped.

He approached the first pyre.

The first pyre was Grover's.

Ikki stopped before the stacked wood and stared for a long time, as if, with sheer willpower, he could make the satyr return. For a moment, he almost expected Grover to appear from there, laughing nervously, adjusting his horns, and saying something like, "Relax, man. It was just an eco-prank."

But the silence of the camp spoke louder. And the smell of smoke came only from the torch he held.

Without a word, Ikki knelt and touched the fire to the base of the pyre. The flames rose slowly, hesitant, as if they understood the weight of what they were about to consume.

"He'd hate this…" Ikki said, his voice low. "He'd complain that burning wood is an insult to nature…"

On the other side, Percy let out a half-smile. But it didn't last…

The second pyre was for the Stolls.

Connor and Travis. Kings of pranks, terrors of the cabins, artists of chaos. Ikki remembered their last prank as if it were yesterday: magical blue paint on all the white clothes in Aphrodite's cabins. It took months to wash out, and even now, under certain lights, they still glowed faintly.

He sighed.

"I bet they're laughing about this now."

And then, as if the universe had a sense of humor, the fire crackled loudly, like mischievous laughter rising from the flames themselves.

The third pyre was Katie Gardner's.

She was kind. Stubborn. Practically the only child of Demeter who didn't give him dirty looks just for being a son of Zeus. She was the one who left fresh fruit at the Big House's door, saying that "men forget to eat when they're angry." She always came to talk to him about all sorts of things…

Ikki lingered a little longer on this one.

"Thank you, Katie…" he murmured. "For everything…"

The pyre ignited with a serene, almost tranquil glow.

The next was Drew Tanaka's.

With her… it was complicated.

Drew never knew the meaning of the word "limit." She'd tried to kiss him on at least four different occasions.

"You were insufferable…" he murmured, almost smiling. "But you were also brave. And, unfortunately, you knew it…"

The flame rose as if in agreement.

And then, the final pyres.

Too many names. Too many faces. Some he knew well. Others he only learned later, reading the lists in silence at the Big House before giving his "blessing" to each of them.

But they all had something in common: they had fought. They had died.

And he, the pharaoh. The most powerful demigod in history. The man who defeated Set, faced the Titans, and drove off an army of monsters alone…

He wasn't fast enough.

Ikki lit the last pyre. The flames rose like a silent chorus. Around him, no one spoke. Annabeth stood to his left, Percy to his right. Sadie's eyes shimmered, but she shed no tears. Zia simply looked in his direction, with concern. Walt and Carter seemed distant.

Ikki stood there.

Motionless.

His eyes fixed on the fire.

Chiron took a few steps forward. His hooves barely made a sound on the damp earth, as if even he respected the silence around them.

He stopped beside Ikki, and for a moment, he seemed to hesitate. His eyes, always wise and calm, were heavier than ever.

He took a deep breath.

"May Hestia receive their flames, and may the gods, in their mercy," he said, his voice firm but choked, "honor the names of those who fell."

The centaur raised his head, and his eyes swept over every face present—from the youngest to the veterans, from the children of Hermes to those of Hades, from those who trembled to those who had seen death too closely.

"They were our friends. Our brothers and sisters. Some of us knew them our whole lives. Others, for weeks. But it doesn't matter how long. What matters is the bond. The choice to fight side by side, even in fear. Even knowing they might not return."

The wind blew gently, as if nature itself were listening.

"The war isn't over." Chiron's voice grew heavier. "What we faced was only a shadow of what is to come. But today… today, we make space for grief. To remember. To swear that their deaths will not be in vain."

He paused, and his eyes rested on Ikki, as if he wanted to share the weight the boy carried.

"Tomorrow, we will prepare again. But for today… stay with your memories. Your friends. Your thoughts. Honor the silence. And if you can… rest."

Chiron turned silently and walked back to the edge of the hill.

One by one, the campers began to disperse.

Clarisse was the first. She said nothing but passed by Ikki and gave a slight nod, as if saying, "We're with you." Walt and Carter followed soon after, carrying the silence of their own prayers.

Zia hesitated, then approached Ikki from behind, placing a light hand on his shoulder. She lingered a second longer than necessary. The touch was almost imperceptible but carried an entire world. She wanted to say something, he felt it in the way her fingers trembled slightly. But Zia was made of fire and discipline, and words like those… they still burned her inside. So she walked away in silence but cast one last intense look, full of everything she didn't say.

Sadie came next. Her steps were heavy, as if every inch of ground was a battle against herself. When she stopped before Ikki, she bit her lower lip, her usual sarcasm completely absent. For a moment, she seemed like just a scared girl who hated losing those she loved.

"If you mess up again and throw yourself alone into one of these fights…" she began, and her voice faltered. Her blue eyes were red, but not a single tear fell. "I swear by Thoth, I'll curse you with eternal lice. And I'm not kidding."

She tried to smile, but the smile broke halfway. Before he could respond, Sadie pulled him into a quick, tight hug and vanished into the mist. A getaway disguised as a farewell.

Annabeth stayed a little longer. Her gaze met his, steady, even if trembling. The whole world could be collapsing, but what existed between them was too solid to crumble easily.

"I know you're going to blame yourself," she said, her voice low, as if speaking only to him. "That you'll try to carry everything. But… you don't have to."

She took a step closer. Her hands trembled, as if fighting something greater than the pain of loss.

"I won't stop you from fighting. But… I'm here." Her gray eyes shone, not with tears, but with something stronger. Something that had been there for a long time and was now impossible to hide. "No matter what happens. I'm with you."

Finally, Percy touched Ikki's shoulder.

"When you want to talk… or destroy something… I'm around."

And then, he too was gone.

Ikki stood alone before the flames.

The sky began to lighten, tinged with a somber red, as if even the sun knew that tomorrow promised no peace; he would enter this War and end it quickly.

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