"You are the young lord aren't you?"
Unexpected words of the old man left August with a sudden unease. He thought as though suddenly people had come to finally know about his identity and what he had done to them in the past.
He felt like his darkest secret was suddenly revealed and now he was vulnerable.
Perhaps people were holding back all this time because they hadn't known who he really was, he thought. And now when he came to know about even the old man knew, August felt a mixed emotion of sadness and guilt wash over him.
He felt guilty of putting so many lives at danger for his childish whims, he felt guilty of many things, but the biggest of them was that he had tarnished the image of his parents.
"Y—Yes" the word barely escaped his mouth. Hesitant to speak he continued nevertheless, "I am"
August could still hear the stifled whispers from the crowd,
"it's him"
"It's really him. That boy."
He could still feel people staring at him intently. And he was ready to apologize to them, to all of them. He was ready to beg for their mercy only to urge them not to judge his mother and father and the upbringing they had given him only because he was their incompetent son.
August looked left and right, people were still staring at him. Suddenly a lady approached him, August feared the words she was about to say. Surprisingly when he heard her speak, he wasn't scared anymore.
"Uh.. excuse me, are you warrior Augustus?" she asked, for some reason she seemed hesitating, "I want to say thank you. We appreciate what you did for us."
August was confused this was really not what he had expected, "Come on baby say hi. You wanted to talk to him didn't you?" the lady said to a younger timid boy who hid behind his mother clinging to her out of nervousness.
"Uh.. hello sir. My name is Leon," The boy came forward. He was very nervous judging from his body language, he spoke the next words in a hurried voice, "I am a big fan of yours. Please tell me how can I become a warrior like you?"
August was speechless, while processing this completely opposite scenario from his thought process, he wasn't quite sure about how to properly react now.
"Excuse me warrior Augustus" this time it was a girl's voice. He turned to her, she was about Leon's age, younger than August obviously. However her behaviour was completely different from the timid boy, she held herself in confidence. Her voice unwavering, "can I touch your sword? Please."
August was still figuring out the right way to react. He said while still trying to process everything,
"This?" gesturing to his sword. "But this …is uh… I am sorry I don't know how safe it is for you…"
August felt a warm touch on his shoulder suddenly, old man Rowan spoke, placing a hand on his shoulder, giving him a warm smile, "it should be alright."
August hesitantly handed the sword to the little girl. She tried to hold it with both of her hands but fell on the ground due to the weight of the weapon. August jolted to help the little girl but before he could do something everyone around him started laughing including the little girl herself.
"Bella dear. Are you alright?" a man said, helping her stand up.
"I am fine, dad. Just got a little unbalanced," the girl said.
The man, Bella's father, shook the dust off her clothes and gave the sword back to August, "uh.. Sorry my lord, my daughter unknowingly disrespected your adorned weapon."
"Not a problem," he waved. "Just make sure she's fine."
"Oh I am alright" the confident little girl spoke, "...and thank you."
"Why thank me? What did I do?" August asked in surprise.
"We heard how you heroically saved our town from a large group of dangerous monsters," it was the timid boy who spoke this time. "I also want to protect my mom from all the threats and I don't know when I will meet you again, so please tell me how you became this strong?"
Finally August came to know why people were suddenly thanking him. They may have heard all this from the support mages who were present at the time of monster tide. But this happened months ago so why thank him now?
August had no idea what to say to that little boy. It was Leon's mother who spoke this time, "my son has been trying to talk to you for a while sir, but since you were busy with the regular patrol we never had courage to directly approach you. And when today we saw you at the park we thought you might be free today. So please, if it isn't too much trouble."
August understood all now. Since he had a misconception that town's people might have hatred towards him, that was why he never stopped on his way. All August did was to lower his gaze and walk forward fearing that the gazes fixated on him might hate him for the person he was.
He felt glad to know that what he thought wasn't even a real problem. They stared at him because they wanted to talk to him, they wanted to thank him for saving their lives. While it was true that August nearly lost his senses in the battle against the monster tide, the fact that he successfully severed countless of the dangers into pieces that could've harmed the town —wasn't a lie either.
For what he did, people were grateful to him.
August looked around, more people were staring at him. Now when he finally had lifted his gaze August could feel that in those eyes there were emotions, many of them but hatred towards him wasn't a part of those emotions.
He looked at the little boy Leon, sat on his knees while confronting him, "you wanna know how I became so powerful, Is that right?"
The black beads like eyes of the boy shone with excitement,
"Eat a lot and listen to your mom"
Admittingly August wasn't the best person to give advice to someone on how to become a powerful person. If anything he was the worst, considering his habit of doubting himself more often. According to him a powerful warrior was someone who knew what they were doing and he was way behind.
For a child however, this was the best advice anyone could've given. Leon was nothing like August so he didn't need to go through all that August has been. This little boy here might have acquired his core element already unlike August who was an ambivalent. Therefore little Leon did not probably have to work as hard as August did. With his core element with himself, he should be fine.
In the faint noise of blowing wind he could still hear people whispering,
"Saviour"
"He is our saviour"
In that evening many more people approached and thanked him.
They gave him the credit where the credit was due. And what August felt today was something he would never forget in his whole life. The feeling of warmth was very wholesome and children admiring him was something he had never thought of before, was simply the cherry on top.
August had heard how kind really people of this town were from his father countless times and today he had experienced it for himself. This was the same feeling, the familial affection that he felt around his parents always. Now he knew the town perceived him as their family and he had made himself distant from these people his whole life.
'Glad to know how wrong I was'
August sat on the bench, beside him old man Rowan was still sitting, staring at the sunset. The world seemed beautiful today.
'Only if that blockhead was also here'
Even if he did not want to admit it directly. He missed Shelly.
He cleared off his mind and focused solely on the thought that he had to make sure no harm ever comes to these people. For the first time in his life, August felt a genuine sense of responsibility towards someone.
He had to protect this lively atmosphere. He had to protect the innocent smiles of little Leon and Bella. He had to protect his town, no matter what.
Suddenly August felt a little afraid. Afraid of living up to his goal, afraid of failing again, afraid that he wasn't strong enough. This was the emotion that he was talking about. This sense of self doubt could never let him be a strong warrior.
This lingering feeling of unease returned every time he started to believe in himself. Maybe it was because of his deepest insecurity. In his heart after all he knew a mage could wipe the floor with him.
That was how strong a person having core elements was naturally. August on the other hand was the complete opposite.
"Surprised?" Old man Rowan suddenly spoke, causing August to look at him with confusion, "I mean everyone in this town loves you, then why do you look so serious?"
August smiled as he lowered his gaze. Maybe his thoughts were showing on his face.
"It's nothing sir," he shook his head, "just thinking about some other things."
"Well, don't think then," the old man replied, "just live in the moment."
August let out a chuckle at his words, impulsively.
"What?" The old man said, his thoughts must be really showing on his face when the old man spoke again, "does that crowd put pressure on you? Are you afraid now?"
Without giving him a chance to reply old man continued,
"Listen to me young man, I am old enough to be your grandpa. The only thing I can tell from my experience is you can never do everything right. What matters is that you tried. If you do something and question yourself, that's what signifies you're giving your best. So, it's alright to question yourself, it's alright to feel fear."
August shook his head with a smile, "No I am …not afraid. Just overwhelmed by the praise and all."
"That's good," the old man said, "you know what praises are the results of what you've already done. It is the result of the past. While it seems good to receive praise, people often forget the fact that praises contain hope. Hope that you might be able to deliver the same results in the future. Meaning the result of the past sets a benchmark for your future so you have to reach higher the next time with the result. Only then it could be satisfactory.
Otherwise the regret of not being good enough will haunt you for the rest of your life."
Old man looked up at the sky, his gaze distant,
"So, don't get caught in hope and believe in yourself more. No matter the circumstances. Just keep moving forward."
There was nothing but silence after these words of the old man.
August wondered was it that obvious to tell from his face that he was a self doubting idiot? First May and then this old man, both of them had told August only one thing.
'Believe in yourself'
However this was the only thing he wasn't able to do. Maybe the reason was the same as when he failed to imagine his own reflection within the conscious realm.
Indeed, the reason was always the same. He did not know himself well enough to imagine himself and to believe in himself, yet.
August felt like a failure again. How was he supposed to understand anything in the world when he did not understand his own self yet?
That was another thing for August to work on.
Under the moonlit night of the starry sky, he returned to his home. Where his mother was waiting for him.
"Mom, I am home," he called.
The reply came after seconds, "welcome"
He placed the sword of the fallen star on the table and sat on a nearby sofa.
"Wash your hands and come eat your dinner" his mother said from the dining room.
"Coming" he replied. Suddenly his gaze fell upon a piece of paper that rested on the wooden table like it was unnoticeable somehow. Curious, August grabbed it.
He realized it as a letter from May. It had been quite a few weeks since he had received last letter from her.
August was excited to hear about the things happening in her life.
He opened the letter and started to read. As he read the words written on that piece of paper, his eyes started tearing up slowly.
"What are you doing? How many times have I called for you?" his mother said from the dining room.
"...coming" he replied, wiped the tears off his face, folded the letter into his pocket and left for dinner.
— — — — —