PARK BENCH | UENO PARK | NEXT DAY | SORA & THE SOUL KING | PIGEONS JUDGING THEM FROM A DISTANCE]
Sora and the Soul King were just chilling, to be fair. Heh, not like the man looked like what a Soul King would look like. His appearance had changed quite a lot.
He didn't look like his prime self anymore, didn't even get to keep his brown eyes. Oh well, at least he got to keep his hair—now even more luscious than when he was alive.
That was a plus, at the very least.
"So," Sora began, lazily throwing popcorn at pigeons like he was testing his accuracy stat, "now that you've got lungs, a working tongue, and actual thoughts again—"
The Soul King sipped from his lemon soda, the fizz tickling a face that hadn't made expressions in several million years.
"...Yes?"
Sora turned fully to him, eyes narrowed, deadly serious.
"Say the Quincy were the best race."
The Soul King blinked. Once. Slowly.
"No."
"C'mon, man! They were literally there earliest, they're your people, Soul Reapers are hell hatchlings," he said, looking at the Soul King.
"That does not make them superior. Simply... earliest."
Sora flailed. Flung. The popcorn bag was gone.
"What!?"
"You gave them bows made of light, you gave them neat uniforms, you let them wear capes—and you're saying they're just fine!?"
"The Shinigami regulate balance," the Soul King responded calmly. "Hollows are necessary for the cycle. Fullbringers have fascinating potential as hybrids. Every race—"
"EVERY RACE?" Sora cut in, eyes twitching. "That's what you're going with? Equal participation trophy vibes?"
"Yes."
Sora gasped.
"Even the Fullbringers!?"
The Soul King sipped again.
"Especially the Fullbringers. Human willpower in physical form. Elegant. Determined. Beautiful in their struggle."
Sora physically recoiled.
"You like Fullbringers!?" he shrieked. "They're just humans with spiritual side effects! They're DLC humans!"
"They have charm," the Soul King said. "Many possess unique perspectives. And their existence is—"
"—not Quincy," Sora snapped. "Damn, man! I'm over here built different, crafted from divinity, pulled Reishi from atoms like string cheese—and you're fanboying over Chad."
The Soul King gave a small shrug.
"He's honorable."
Sora leaned back and covered his face.
"This is insane. I should've made you a dog. A sexy Zhongli dog. Who barks only when I say
'Quincy supremacy.'"
This wasn't a joke. He had considered it. Would be fun. But considering how powerful the current Soul King was, he could probably give himself a human form, and Sora wouldn't want to piss off his dad.
Not trying to jeopardize his favorite son status.
He then looked at the Soul King.
The Soul King just stared at him with the patience of a glacier.
After a long silence, Sora squinted sideways.
"Okay... which female human's your top pick?"
"..."
He was silent.
Sora waggled his eyebrows.
"C'mon, Your High Holy Handyman. I know you watched all of humanity's romantic dramas like an interdimensional soap opera addict. Spill."
The Soul King's brow furrowed.
"That is an inappropriate question."
"That means there's a ranking."
"There is not."
Sora leaned in, eyes glittering with mischief.
"Is it Orihime? Big heart, bigger—"
"Child," the Soul King cut in flatly.
"Yuzu? Karen? That one girl who tried to kiss Ichigo in season one?"
"I do not think in such terms."
"So you do think. That's a new development."
"..."
"You paused. That means there's someone."
"..."
Sora pointed triumphantly.
"Maybe Rangiku, you do strike me as the type to love women with big hearts... no, since you're from far back, maybe that pink-haired girl from Squad Zero but in her chubby form. You seem like the kind of guy to go for them."
The Soul King took a long sip of soda again, dead silent, staring ahead like he regretted ever being born.
Sora nodded to himself, smug as hell.
"I knew it. You like 'em bumbly, chubby, and with light PTSD."
A crow flew overhead and judged them both.
The Soul King spoke again, voice crisp, like scripture.
"Your immaturity is infinite."
"And yet I'm still more fun than anyone else you ever created."
"...That is not inaccurate."
Sora blinked.
"Wait. Did I just get a W?"
"You may interpret it that way... if it helps you grow."
"Gross. Sounded like a dad."
The Soul King smiled faintly.
Sora slouched back on the bench, finally done annoying God for the day, while whispering under his breath:
"...Quincy still better though."
The Soul King didn't respond.
Which meant Sora won.
Sort of.
Maybe.
Probably not.
He would pester the Soul King till he got his answer. Yes, his superiority complex was indeed that vast. Don't mind him.
But the Soul King was right—Fullbringers were, in fact, OP as fuck. Pretty busted too, if you think about it.
Speaking of which, he should probably stop by and pay them a visit.
"Oh, by the way, you need to go pay Aura a visit."
"Hm."
The Soul King didn't say much. He knew what Sora meant.
"Maybe we could pass you off as a Fullbringer. Can't have people knowing your true identity."
"I am surprised you didn't say Quincy, considering your infatuation with them," the man said in a calm voice.
"As much as I would want to, it's not optimal."
"And why is that?" the being asked.
"You'll be under supervision from Soul Society and your second son's view, and frankly it's a lot."
"So you do think."
"What are you trying to imply?"
"I was not implying anything. I was merely saying you are quite insightful."
"So Fullbringer it is... which body part will be the one you inherited?" Sora gazed at the Soul King...
"No."
"You will be the Soul King sack."
"I said no."
"Come on."
"No."