With the real business finally settled, Sarutobi Hiruzen let out a long, weary sigh—relief rolling off his shoulders.
"Rinjin, now that the main issue's handled, you better pitch in with the village work too! You're a Konoha jonin, after all!"
Rinjin flashed a humble grin, his eyes crinkling with good humor. "Just let me know what you need, Uncle Hiruzen. I'm happy to help however I can."
Hiruzen grumbled inwardly—old fox—but kept his tone light. "I'll be blunt. Lately, the whole village is on edge. How do we get back to that old sense of harmony and unity?"
Rinjin paused, his smile fading as he grew thoughtful. "Honestly? It's tricky, but not impossible. If you can't fix internal problems, redirect them. Find an enemy, give 'em hell! Use outside pressure to unite everyone—just keep it under control.
"Here's how: pick a country, start a fight. Play it weak at first, let them push into Fire Country, make the villagers feel a real crisis. That's when you step up—rally the people, hit 'em with a speech about the Will of Fire.
"Then, hit back hard. Drive the enemy out. Afterward, honor some heroes, give another Will of Fire speech. And finally, own up to a few harmless mistakes—take the blame for something minor.
"In that charged atmosphere, the villagers might even break down crying, get all reflective, and start taking the blame themselves. That way, everyone shares the burden. United against a common enemy, beat back the invaders, celebrate together—it's classic lord-management drama!"
The Hokage's office fell into a heavy silence. For a long moment, no one spoke.
Finally, Hiruzen nodded slowly, a sly smile tugging at his lips. "Hmm… That's exactly what I had in mind."
Shameless old bastard!
Danzo cursed silently, barely keeping his face neutral.
"Any other bright ideas, Rinjin?" Hiruzen pressed, tone testing.
Rinjin nodded, straightforward as ever. "Rebrand the insurance program—call it 'benefits.' If that's not enough, cut off a slice of the pie and let the villagers have a taste."
"Excellent, excellent!"
Hiruzen's eyes gleamed, already sold on the plan. He had to admit—Rinjin's brain worked fast, and his ideas were slick.
Feeling playful, Hiruzen joked, "Rinjin, ever thought about becoming the Fourth Hokage?"
The words dropped like a bomb. The entire office froze, dead silent.
Everyone stared at Hiruzen like he'd lost his mind—even he was surprised by his own suggestion.
But the more he thought, the more it made sense. Rinjin really was the perfect candidate for Fourth Hokage.
Age? Sure, thirty was a bit old. But strength? Top-tier, no question—Flying Thunder God, Eight Gates, even forbidden jutsu like Edo Tensei. Rinjin's combat ability was more than enough.
Brains? The guy was a natural—always reading people, always a step ahead with his schemes.
Background? Okay, he was from Hidden Rain, but he'd married Tsunade! News of their wedding had already reached every corner of Konoha's leadership.
He'd married the Konoha Princess—how could he not come back and inherit the family business?
The more Hiruzen thought about it, the more he wanted it. Rinjin was the best successor, hands down. And with Konoha and Hidden Rain joining forces? Unstoppable.
He could just imagine reporting to Hashirama and Tobirama in the Pure Land: "Senseis, your granddaughter's husband is the Fourth Hokage. The village is stronger than ever!"
Seeing Hiruzen's growing excitement, Rinjin scratched his head, giving a sheepish laugh. "Uncle Hiruzen… you're joking, right? My teacher, Hanzo the Salamander, is still waiting for me to take over Hidden Rain…"
Yeah, right!
All three men mentally scoffed. Like they didn't know Rinjin had forced Hanzo into crossdressing, killed him, then brought him back with Edo Tensei just to make him work. Threatening him with more dresses if he slacked off. Only Rinjin could pull off something so outrageous.
Seeing their skeptical faces, Rinjin grew desperate, scratching his head harder. "Hey! I'm serious! I really can't be Hokage! Think about it—right now, when I make money, it's just making money. But if I become Hokage, making money turns into abuse of power and embezzlement!
"Third Hokage, you don't want the village you worked so hard to build getting cleaned out by me, do you?"
Hiruzen rolled his eyes so hard it was a miracle they didn't get stuck. Everyone else fought tooth and nail to become Hokage, and here was Rinjin, talking about embezzlement!
Rinjin tried to explain further, but Hiruzen cut him off with a raised hand. "Alright, alright, let's drop it for now. Go home and think about it. Maybe talk it over with Tsunade!"
Rinjin nodded, grumbling to himself. Talk it over with Tsunade? That airhead wouldn't know the first thing!
After a few more words of small talk, Rinjin got up and took his leave.
As the door closed, the smiles faded from the faces inside.
"Hiruzen, about the war…"
"Don't even start," Hiruzen interrupted, voice firm. "We cannot start a war anytime soon. The village isn't ready—on any front."
Seeing Hiruzen's clarity, Danzo just nodded, leaning on his cane as he left.
Same old story—he wanted Hiruzen out, but not at the cost of the village.
On Fire Avenue, Rinjin wandered leisurely, thoughts drifting wherever they pleased.
With this meeting done, Sakumo's suicide attempt was finally behind them. Compared to pulling Kagami out of trouble back then, saving Sakumo had been almost effortless.
Not bad. They could both go be gate guards in Hidden Rain Village—when he retired, he'd join them.
They could totally form a Geezer Security Squad. One day on, two days off—two-man shifts, three shifts rotating:
Shift One: Uchiha Kagami + Hatake Sakumo
Shift Two: Sakukata Rinjin + Jiraiya
Shift Three: To be determined…
The team name? "Geezers Will Always Be Geezers."