Hearing Jirachi's words, Julian's voice grew even colder, but because of the boar-head, the two little ones naturally couldn't see his expression.
"Julian calls you 'Lord Celebi' and 'Lord Jirachi' at home—seems like he doesn't have much status in the family. Aren't you his Pokémon?"
Julian asked, continuing to set them up.
Celebi was already getting carried away, while Jirachi seemed to have noticed something.
'Why can this guy understand what Celebi and I are saying?' It seemed to think of something terrifying and carefully examined the other's physique.
'Damn, eight-pack abs—this isn't right.'
This boar-headed guy is actually Julian in cosplay.'
Thinking of this, Jirachi's legs went soft and it was about to fall from midair; its little face also turned deathly pale. Seeing Celebi about to open its mouth and keep talking, Jirachi wanted to stop it from digging its own grave.
But the next second, a sharp blade tip was pressed against Jirachi's forehead.
Frightened, Jirachi hurriedly shut its mouth.
Celebi, however, didn't see this. It raised its head, nostrils flaring arrogantly, and said, "That blockhead is nothing at home. What family status? He's got zero standing."
"Let me tell you, it's only outside that people take him seriously. He might seem impressive, but at home, he's just my little lackey. If I tell him to go east, he doesn't dare go west."
Julian was so angry inside that he almost laughed.
His body trembled slightly.
Jirachi fearfully covered its mouth, staring at Celebi and frantically signaling with its eyes for it to stop talking.
The surrounding onlookers also seemed to have noticed that something was off.
Why did Jirachi look so scared? Even with a blade tip pressed to its forehead—even if it was a real blade—a human shouldn't be able to hurt it.
After all, according to Julian's trainer profile, its strength was at the Pseudo-Champion level.
So with that kind of power, why was it afraid?
And why did Celebi seem so smug right now? Its expression was exactly like when one bragged in front of their buddies—maybe even worse.
"Oh, you really are amazing," Julian said calmly.
"Of course! And Jirachi, what's wrong with you?"
When Celebi looked at the boar-headed guy, it finally noticed Jirachi's odd behavior and asked curiously, "What's wrong with you? Why are you pretending to be scared? Is this some new kind of selfie expression?"
Faced with Celebi's questioning, Jirachi covered its mouth and shook its head, not daring to utter a single word. It kept gesturing with its eyes, pointing toward the boar-headed man.
"Bas***d, are you bullying my brother? Let me tell you, if you really dare to do this, I'll make that blockhead beat you up!"
Celebi finally reacted, but it had misread the situation. It thought Jirachi was just scared by the boar-headed guy's prop blade.
"But you've got a great physique—you even have an eight-pack like that blockhead. Huh, the shape of the abs looks pretty similar too."
"Let me tell you, that blockhead is so narcissistic. Every time he finishes showering, he strikes a few poses in front of the mirror and asks me if his abs and pecs look good."
"It's really weird—even your pecs look just like his."
"You're not… his long-lost twin brother or something, are you?"
"Hahaha!"
Celebi burst out laughing at its own joke.
Jirachi: 'I'm tired. Just let the world end.'
Looking at Celebi digging its own grave like this, Jirachi had completely given up hope for survival. It just prayed that in the next life, it wouldn't have to know Celebi again.
This guy was just way too much of a troublemaker.
"And you know, Jirachi often tells me behind his back that blockhead sucks at playing Aggron—that it could play better with its feet. Honestly, I think so too."
As soon as those words were out, Julian's gaze shifted to Jirachi.
This guy had always been praising him for playing well—was it all a lie? Was it playing both sides all along?
"Julian, I didn't! Celebi is just making things up!"
Jirachi finally couldn't hold back anymore, blurting out in a panicked voice.
Celebi froze for a moment, then sneered, "Jirachi, have you lost your mind? How could he possibly be that blockhead? Don't think just because his abs and pecs look the same, he's—"
Celebi's legs suddenly gave way, and it dropped to its knees.
Staring at Julian, who had removed the boar-head mask to reveal a grim expression, Celebi felt as if the universe had played a massive joke on it.
Or maybe it was dreaming. Yeah, that must be it—it was definitely dreaming.
It pinched its own thigh hard.
'Ouch, that hurt!'
So this wasn't a dream.
"Whoa, that guy is actually Champion Walker!"
"Wasn't Champion Walker's bike stolen? How did he suddenly show up here?"
"Why is Celebi kneeling? That practiced motion looks both heartbreaking and hilarious."
"Champion Walker's physique is really something else."
"I just took a photo with him and even got to touch him! I've decided—I'm not washing this hand for a year!"
As Julian removed the mask and revealed his face, the crowd around him immediately exploded.
No one had expected that, while attending a comic con, they would not only see Celebi and Jirachi but also Julian cosplaying as the boar-headed guy.
And the key point was that Julian was shirtless.
This convention was an absolute win.
Photos—take as many as possible, go all out!
Julian shot a glare at the person who brought up the bike. The whole bike incident had already become a joke across the internet.
Then, his gaze shifted to Celebi, who was kneeling on the ground, and turned toward Jirachi, who had also—at some point—knelt down as well.
"Dad, what brings you here?"
Celebi asked with a fawning smile.
"Don't, I don't deserve it."
"Shouldn't you, Lord Celebi, be calling me 'blockhead,' 'little lackey,' or 'noob'? And what about our Lord Jirachi here?"
Julian sneered at the two little bas***ds.
One face in front and another behind—playing this pretty smoothly, huh.
"Julian, Celebi taught me all this! You know I'm well-behaved. It's all Celebi's fault!" Jirachi looked at Julian with an extremely wronged expression.
Better to sacrifice a friend than yourself—at critical moments, good buddies were meant to take the hit.
Jirachi directly threw Celebi under the bus.
"You jerk, Jirachi! Why are you blaming me for what you did? Julian, you can't trust Jirachi—it's already turned rotten!"
Jirachi glared at Celebi and retorted indignantly, "I have turned rotten? I learned it from you, my idol!"
"What did you just say, you bas***d?!" Celebi angrily stood up from the ground.
"I said it's you!" Jirachi also stood up.
The two little ones glared at each other furiously.
Julian slightly furrowed his brows.
"Jerk!"
With that, Celebi punched Jirachi in the stomach, sending it flying several meters away.
The crowd gasped in surprise.
"You hit me?!"
"So what if I hit you?"
Bam!
The next second, Celebi was also punched by Jirachi.
Then, the two little ones started fighting in mid-air, moving farther and farther away until they disappeared from sight.
After a long moment, a kind-hearted bystander reminded Julian, "Um, Champion Walker… did they just run away?"
Julian: (╯°□°)╯︵ ┻━┻
*****
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