[Nine-Tails: You little brat! Like hell I'd be moved by love! First I'll smack you dead with my tail, then shred you with my claws, and finally bite your head off!
Trying to make me reconcile with that damned woman Kushina? Dream on! She either has me chained up or locked away! Never gonna happen! Heitui!]
Kazuyama Gekkō listened in silence as the system perfectly mimicked Nine-Tails' tone. He had to admit, the impression was spot-on—pretty entertaining, even. But seeing Kushina's expression getting darker by the second, he instantly understood that whatever Nine-Tails actually said must've been a lot worse.
"Kushina, are you okay? Why do you look so pale?"
Minato, deeply concerned for his wife, asked gently. But Kushina just snapped:
"Don't talk. I'm communicating with Nine-Tails in a friendly manner!"
That "friendly" definitely didn't sound very friendly. Kazuyama could already picture the poor Nine-Tails suspended midair by glowing chains, getting whipped to a pulp. Tsk, tsk. Poor guy.
Still, Kazuyama's words had clearly made an impression.
Kushina needed strength—strength to protect the people she loved. And the Nine-Tails, without question, was her best option.
Nine-Tails: "Heitui! Not a chance! I'd rather jump into a pit than—oh forget it, I'm not messing with this violent woman again!"
Kushina: "Hmph! Love? Do you even know what love is? I'm excited when I fight, and I love you when I scold you! Now shut up and accept my love!"
Kazuyama couldn't help but imagine the scene—Kushina and Nine-Tails, locked in a twisted, affectionate brawl.
For a Jinchūriki, maybe true love really was between them and their Tailed Beast.
Then he caught Chōmei's gaze. For one solid second, they stared at each other.
And then both turned away and spat.
"I thought we were brothers, but you want me as your lover?! Disgusting, Kazuyama. You just made a bug throw up."
"Screw off! You're not even close to my type. Go find yourself a nice caterpillar!"
...
Leaving the Nine-Tails topic behind, it was time for another headache: the Uchiha problem.
This incident clearly involved the Uchiha Clan. Minato and Hiruzen were both already stressed about it.
Kazuyama didn't understand why they were so worked up. He volunteered himself and left without waiting for approval.
"Do you really think he can handle this, old man? I have serious doubts…"
"You're not the only one. I don't feel good about this either…"
The two Hokage exchanged a heavy look. Worry was written all over their faces.
Kazuyama's methods were... hard to explain politely.
Just as Hiruzen reached into his robe again, trying to light up his pipe to ease the stress, he pulled out nothing but a scrap of paper. When he read the note, any lingering concern instantly turned into fury.
"You little bastard! That was premium wood!"
The note read:
"Old geezer, I hid your pipe. As the Hokage, you should know the village best, right? Go find it. It's somewhere in the village! Can't find it? Then no more smoking for you!"
Meanwhile, Kazuyama—now strolling away from Minato's home—looked at the pipe in his hand and sneered.
"Old man, I told you to stop puffing that thing. Hmph."
"Pipe? Go find it!"
He tossed the pipe into the air. A crystal eagle materialized, snatched it midair, and soared off toward Hokage Rock.
[Ding! Detected host stealing Hiruzen Sarutobi's beloved pipe and hiding it in the nostril of the Third Hokage's stone face. How malicious!
Special reward: an Adamantine Umbrella!]
Wait, what? Adamantine Umbrella???
Kazuyama blinked. He reached into his chest, and sure enough, a scroll had appeared.
He unrolled it, and with a poof—out popped a heavy, reinforced umbrella.
Whoa. He'd been joking, but apparently he was right on target.
"System, is this what I think it is?"
He still had to ask. After all, it was system-made.
[Ding! Not exactly. The Adamantine Umbrella has been completely re-engineered for the Naruto world as a ninja tool.
Inject chakra to deploy a chakra shield. The Adamantine Umbrella cannot be broken by Kekkei Genkai like Crystal Release, fully living up to the name 'Adamantine.']
Oh? Even Crystal Release can't crystalize it?
Kazuyama quickly infused the umbrella with chakra. As it opened, a glowing blue barrier instantly formed.
It looked a bit like Lady Chiyo's Mechanical Light Shield Block, but the area it covered was even larger.
Nice.
Kazuyama stored it away immediately. He planned to hand it over to Pakura—he didn't need it himself.
Speaking of gear, he suddenly remembered the Six Paths Ninja Tools:
Kōkinjō, Shichiseiken, Benihisago, Kohaku no Jōhei, and Bashōsen.
Only the Kohaku no Jōhei remained. The other four had been buried along with Kinkaku and Ginkaku—literally taken to the grave.
Kazuyama wasn't being greedy. He just figured it was time to team up with Orochimaru for a little treasure hunting. Letting those legendary tools rot underground? Totally wasteful.
But for now, there was something more urgent: the Uchiha.
...
The Uchiha compound had been untouched by the Nine-Tails' rampage. Everything was still intact.
Kazuyama walked right up and knocked on Fugaku's front door.
"Hmm? Are you Lord Kazuyama Gekkō?"
"Are you here to see my father?"
The one who opened the door wasn't Fugaku—but a strikingly handsome little kid.
Itachi Uchiha.
The future legend, still just a child.
Kazuyama's mouth curled up in a grin.
"Itachi, where's Fugaku?"
"My father isn't here. He went with some clansmen to repair the village's outer walls."
Oh? Fugaku's not home?
Perfect.
"I see. What about your mother?"
"She's putting my baby brother to sleep. Kazuyama-sama, wai—"
Before he could finish, Kazuyama grabbed Itachi, slammed the door shut, and vanished with Flying Thunder God.
When they reappeared, they were deep in a forest.
"This… Is this the Flying Thunder God Technique my father mentioned?"
"This is the Forest of Death?"
The abrupt change in scenery widened Itachi's eyes, but he didn't panic—he remained impressively composed.
"Hmm? Itachi? Captain Kazuyama?"
"What are you two doing here?"
Kazuyama didn't even get the chance to speak—two people were already staring at them in disbelief.
Kakashi. And Shisui.
"Heh…"
Hearing his captain's familiar chuckle, and seeing Itachi beside him, Shisui quickly put the pieces together.
"Captain… You didn't just snatch Itachi while Clan Head Fugaku was away, did you?"
"Nonsense! Snatch? No way!"
"I brought him here as a playmate—for you guys!"
..
(100 Chapters Ahead)
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