Agnes sat across from Leorin at a modest roadside restaurant, the air filled with sizzling spices and grilled meat. The clatter of plates and murmured conversations around them contrasted awkwardly with the silence between the two.
Agnes stared at the menu as if trying to solve a murder.
"Why are there so many types of bread?" he muttered. "Flatbread, round bread, ghost bread—what even is ghost bread? Is it dead?"
Leorin, dressed in a red coat with gold buttons and the kind of boots that screamed rich girl with a lot of pride, she rolled her eyes. "You brought me here and now you're having a breakdown over bread?"
Agnes blinked at her. "Bread?? No, I am Broke. You said you wanted to eat. This is a place for eating."
"No, I meant somewhere romantic! A date!" she snapped.
Agnes tilted his head like a confused puppy. "You said 'feed me,' not 'flirt with me.' Next time be specific."
Leorin leaned back and sighed. "How are you this bad at talking to people?"
Agnes considered that. "My social stats are low."
She snorted, then caught herself and frowned. "Don't make me laugh. I'm still mad at you."
"For what?" Agnes asked.
"You disappeared for two years without telling me! I thought you died! I mourned you like a tragic wife!"
"You mourned me?" Agnes blinked. "That might be the biggest I've ever heard." He laughed.
After some minutes dead silence.
To break the silence Agnes "Miss, what are you doing here?" he asked, trying to sound cool, but his voice cracked like a broken flute.
Leorin, ever the dramatic performer, flipped her hair and let out a maniacal laugh. "I joined a magic sect, obviously!" she boasted. "And they chose me to fight in the tournament. With this much talent, who else could they choose?" She laughed like a villain in a low-budget play.
Agnes blinked. "Oh… cool."
Then his expression turned serious. Sad. The fork fell from his trembling hand.
"What's happening at home?" he asked softly. "I've got this feeling… like something bad happened. Or maybe it's just gas, but I don't think so."
Leorin looked down, suddenly fiddling with her fingers. Her face twisted into a bittersweet smile, the kind people make when they remember the ice cream truck that never came.
The mood shifted. Leorin's fingers fidgeted on the table, and a bittersweet expression clouded her face. She spoke in a hushed voice, "After you left, the House of Wioure was declared traitors to the Kingdom of Novalia. Since Lamin was engaged to Lily, the House of Elowen fell under suspicion too. We've lost a lot—power, allies... everything."
Agnes stiffened. "But... are they all right?" he asked softly.
"They're fine," Leorin sighed. "No one's dead, just politically screwed. But Lily… she's a shut-in now. Refuses to leave her room. Her engagement was canceled too."
Agnes gave a faint smile. "So, everything's all right then."
Leorin slammed her hands on the table, making him jump. "All right?! Did you even hear me??"
Agnes flinched, immediately saluting like a scared intern. "Y-Yes, Miss!"
Leorin sighed and sat back down, cooling off. "Do you know the truth about Lily's behavior toward you?"
Agnes looked up at the ceiling like he was pondering the mysteries of life. "Yeah... she was blackmailed by the Duke into cutting off my hands but chose to kick me out instead. She's quite the actress."
Leorin gave a disappointed pout. "So you do know. I was hoping for some epic emotional meltdown, but nooo, you're just emotionally stable. What a letdown."
"Was that so hard to realize?" Agnes muttered, disappointed in her disappointment.
Suddenly, Leorin jumped to her feet. "Time for the Assessment! Let's go. And what's with your backpack?"
Agnes looked over his shoulder. "You just noticed?"
"Put it somewhere else!" she barked like a tired mom with a headache.
They sprinted to the assessment hall, joining a long line of eager and confused contestants. As they waited, they rambled about magical beasts, absurd summoning theories, and whether dragons had bathroom breaks.
After some moment....
When Leorin's turn came, she strutted into the glowing white room, which looked like a hospital.
An old lady and a group of unnervingly cheerful nurses greeted her "Hello, my dear. Sit in the chair and focus on the clock on the wall."
Leorin unaware looked at the clock. "T..The Clock?"
Moments she looked at the clock, a scream echoed through the halls. "AUGHHHHHHHH!"
Leorin stormed out, eyes watery.
Agnes laughed. "Why are you crying?"
Leorin in pain "Go! find yourself."
He stepped into the same bright white room and whispered, "This… this is just a sci-fi hospital. Holy crap, they've got light bulbs and sterile walls! What happened to this world??"
The old lady chuckled. "Not many know, but the world is going through a scientific revolution. It'll all be public soon."
As she spoke, Agnes felt a sharp pain in his arm.
He looked down in betrayal. "What the hell—are you taking my blood?!"
A nurse smiled innocently while holding a needle the size of a baby sword.
"AUGHHHHH!!!" Agnes screamed.
He stumbled out moments later, pale and scarred emotionally.
Leorin burst out laughing. "You should've seen your face!"
Agnes groaned. "You could've warned me!"
Days Later
Agnes was asleep in his dorm. Completely buried under his books like a mummy sealed in a library tomb.
A loud HUMMMMMM shook the air. Agnes rolled off his bed when something hovered above him.
The sound and Wind pressure waked him up.
"I-It's a freaking drone!!" he yelped, eyes bulging.
A holographic screen popped out like it was trying to give him a heart attack. A well-dressed talking ape appeared, wearing a tie, a monocle, and what looked like a vest made of royal silk.
"Good morning contestants! We are delighted to inform you that your assessments are complete. You have one hour to gather in the main plaza to receive your results!"
Agnes blinked. "A… monkey?"
The ape continued: "We have sent each of you a flying device known as a drone. It contains a mana stone that is also your ID. If it breaks, you are disqualified."
Some contestants stared in awe. Others, terrified by the "floating demon metal box," smashed their drones into oblivion at sight like confused cavemen.
POV: Roi (A Random Contestant Dressed Like a Cowboy)
Roi stomped down a dirt road in leather boots, cloak flapping dramatically. A drone hovered behind him like a very persistent pigeon.
Roi started shouting in the middle of the road,"Within one hour?! What the hell is this tournament even about?!"
He was in a completely different town.The name of the town? Hiberne. (Imagine an old Irish town)
Roy looked at the clock tower situated in the middle of town. He clutched his hair."What the fuck? Wasn't this supposed to be a fighting tournament? Then why the goddamn marathon?! Fuck it—I'm not going."
He proceeded to enter a tavern."Miss, can I get two barrels of whiskey and two goats? Cooked by the way."
POV: Yifan – Public Toilet Disaster
Yifan sat miserably in a Roman-style shared toilet, holding his stomach.
The drone floated in.
Everyone in the room stared.
"W-Why is it here again?!" Yifan screamed.
An old man next to him squinted at the drone. "Is this thing… recording us?"
Yifan embarrassed "No,no it's not recording."
The drone projected the ape again. "Also, please note: you will now be monitored 24/7 for security purposes. Smile for the system!"
Click. The message ended.
The people around Yifan froze. Their faces slowly turned red.
Some of them squealed and ran off like shy little girls, covering their faces with both hands.
Others?
They grabbed their own shit and threw it at Yifan and the drone with the fury of betrayed gladiators.
Yifan, still mid-squat, screamed,"WHY ME?! I DIDN'T EVEN ....."
POV: A man named Cian.
He was having an intimate moment with a random woman he'd just met.
Suddenly, a soft humming noise filled the room. A drone hovered in through the open window, but Cian, still unaware, stretched and said:
"What a beautiful day. Bees are buzzing their wings, the weather is breezy..."
The woman's eyes widened in horror as she spotted the drone and the face of an ape sipping tea on the holographic screen.
She shrieked, wrapped herself in the blanket, and dove under the bed.
"Is that your wife?!" she screamed.
Cian jolted upright."My wife? Where??"Without hesitation, he joined her under the bed, trembling.
Now both of them were crouched beneath the bed like children hiding from a horror movie.
The woman whispered, voice trembling:"Is that monkey your wife?"
Cian looked personally offended."My wife ain't no monkey. Matter of fact—I'm unmarried!"
The woman, now disappointed, narrowed her eyes."Then why were you scared?"
Cian, clearly triggered, shouted back:"Because YOU scared ME!!"
Goingg back ....
Back at the assessment center, contestants began flooding in, some sprinting like madmen, some flying on swords, others panting like dogs.
Agnes stood beside Leorin, brushing dust off his robe."This feels like a prank show?"
And the Ape Reporter? He was sipping tea in the hologram, muttering to himself:
"…Why do I even work with mortals?"