Eirian sent letters of to both Eric and her uncle before they left, explaining that she was awake, healing, and going to look into a possible cause for the miasma at the Camelia.
She was disappointed to hear that Eric hadn't found anything about Arnheim in Aontacht's records, so she'd asked him to find what he could about the Ye family and hoped there'd be something useful there.
Marian hadn't been pleased that Eirian was planning to leave either. Had stood over her with her hands on her hips like Eirian was some errant child while she packed. "You haven't even recovered fully. Neither has Lord Ye. The soldiers can handle searching the outpost."
"The soldiers won't go near it according to Chenzhou and Yuze."
Marian pursed her lips. "Superstitious children."
"Besides, there's nothing there that can hurt me. Better I go than anyone else." Marian was so quiet after that that Eirian looked up from her packing. "What?"
Marian stared at her for a moment, something odd in her eyes, before she took the robes out of Eirian hands and re-folded them properly. "Simply because you are the least likely to be hurt, is not a reason to sacrifice yourself before all others." She took all of Eirian's clothes out of her saddlebags, re-folded them, rearranged everything, and packed the saddle bags again. Then she finally looked at Eirian again. "My husband worked himself to the bone to protect the Camelia until Lord Ye was old enough, ready, to take over. And then he kept working until the day he died, because he thought it was better he do it than someone else, because poor Chenzhou was always so sick. Now he is gone before we ever got to have our years of rest before that final night. You have healed Chenzhou, you have already done far more than anyone expected. Perhaps even more than anyone deserved given the path that brought you here. There is no need to continue to sacrifice yourself on someone else's altar."
Eirian stared at the older woman. Always so somber and dressed in black. Still morning a husband gone years before and showing no interest in looking for another companion. She didn't actually know much about Marian, except that she was from the capital and followed her husband to the Camelia. Given how close she still carried him, Eirian felt safe in assuming it had been a love match. A love match that had never resulted in children for whatever reason.
Given the motherly role Marian had clearly played in Chenzhou's life it was odd to hear her tell Eirian she was doing too much for him. Some kind of misplaced sympathy, perhaps, because they'd both come to the Camelia from the capital when they were young women in new marriages. Marian's choice to come to the Camelia came from love, but Eirian supposed that didn't always mean she'd been happy about it.
Or that she enjoyed being here now. Women were experts at surviving suffering and first glances were never to be trusted. Eirian herself was a prime example. She'd hidden her magic so well that she'd actually used it in front of people, and they still didn't believe she had it. No one but Eric knew how strongly she'd felt about Philip or how lonely she'd felt at the Soliel Estate during the years her father been drowning in a bottle.
And Eirian had always been careful to keep her ambitions for herself within reason. A marriage of her choice and freedom to do as she pleased. Enough distance to the throne that she was never a threat but close enough that she could support Eric.
They may have been big goals for most, but they were small for the only Princess of the Soliel family. There were many who would have been eyeing the throne itself if they were in Eirian's position. Or something more if they'd been born with her power.
Eirian still didn't fully understand her own magic and the recent dreams were only clouding the issue. She'd dreamt the entire time she'd been unconscious and while some of her dreams were typical, about the capital and Philip and the mother she'd never known, the majority had been about that place.
The dead world behind the veil. There'd been more…people(?) there. That felt like what she'd always thought siblings would feel like. She had a hard time recalling their faces when she was awake, but she could remember the sharpness of the world, of the magic that was everywhere and ethereal veil that fluttered between that place and the world of the living.
She hadn't yet told anyone else about the dreams. She wanted to know more before she risked finding someone who already knew about them. Who'd be able to lie and convince Eirian it was true because she didn't know any better.
One of the most valuable lessons she'd learned in the capital was never to ask a question until you already knew the answer.
It made her hesitate to ask Marian why she suddenly cared about Eirian. Or to trust the seemingly maternal tendencies the older woman displayed.
"You could come with us." Eirian offered, curious. Marian had never said anything about leaving the Camelia, but her husband had been the most powerful man in the Camelia, at least for a brief period, and had probably led the Camelia's Crimson Force on campaign multiple times. Had Marian accompanied him? It was common among the nobility, men and women liked to bring company for long trips, and when it wasn't a spouse, it was often a lover or close friend. Eirian and Eric had often brought one another along on extended trips from the capital.
She wasn't surprised when Marian shook her head. "It has been years since I left the Camelia. I would not be of any use."
Eirian tied her saddlebags closed. "Then maybe you should go so you can be useful next time."
~ tbc