"Hngg...what time is it?"
Angel murmured as she sat up in bed. She reached for her phone, squinting at the screen.
「9am」
"Ughh, I was asleep for that long?"
She rubbed her sore eyes. She wasn't sure how long she'd cried last night—maybe she even fell asleep doing it?
Dragging herself out of bed, she glanced at her messy blanket. No urge to fix it. Whatever. She slowly shuffled over to the mirror.
Hair? a disaster. Eyes? red, puffy, half-closed.
She looked like a total mess. But she didn't feel like fixing herself. What's the point?
She padded over to her door and slowly opened it, peeking left... then right.
Quiet. No clinking dishes, no rustling of her parents getting ready.
They must've left.
She made her way to the kitchen and opened the rice cooker. Still warm. Enough rice to last 'til lunch.
Angel grabbed a plate, scooped some rice, and made her way to the dining table. Today's ulam? Just hotdogs. That's... fine.
She took a bite. It tasted... alright.
"Will I really be alright, I wonder?"
Angel murmured, chewing slowly.
Writing's her dream. Not just some delulu fantasy. She knows she's got what it takes. But her parents... her papa... they aren't wrong. She has nothing tangible to show them. Nothing that screams "this is a career."
Barely any followers.
Views?
Even less.
Yeah, she got 5k recent requests, but that's just 'cause people wanna see more of her.
Not her writing.
Her.
She doesn't want a cosplay career. Or to model. She'd hate it if her fame was just 'cause of her looks.
『Which is... painfully obvious now.』
Angel thought as she finished her food.
As she was washing the dishes, she heard her phone buzz. She wiped her hands haphazardly on a towel and leaned over the table to peek at the screen.
It's from Maria.
"What does she want?"
Angel muttered, going back to rinse the plates properly before checking the message.
Messenger.
『Hey angel!! how's it goinggg?』
Oh??
『I'm doing fine, I guess..why?』
she typed.
『Oh it's nothing, thought I'd check on you』
Angel couldn't help but smile a little.
『I see, thank you... that's kinda sweet of you』
...Wait—did she seriously just send that?!
『Pfft, sweet of me? why thank you~ of course, as your big sister I have to check on you』
Angel smiled even more. And then—tears.
Streaming, without warning.
"A-ah? why am I crying... I'm so dumb sometimes."
She laughed softly, tears still sliding down her cheeks. She tried to wipe them away, but they kept coming.
Is it all the bottled-up feelings? Or just... everything from yesterday? She didn't know. She typed slowly, as her fingers brushed the teardrops from her phone.
『Thank you. Really.』
Maria responded.
『What's with you?? You seem so open today?』
『It's nothing, I just felt like it』
Angel replied, sniffing.
『I'm gonna go for now, ate... thank you.』
『No worries, Angel! Chat with me anytimee~』
Angel smiled, setting her phone down. She curled up on the sofa, hugging her knees close.
Why was she like this? Just from texting Maria... from a few kind words...
『I don't know anymore』
She sniffled again. She didn't feel like doing anything. Maybe she's only good at that.
Procrastinating.
Being utterly useless.