The rest of my hospital stay was… peaceful. Relatively speaking. Which meant my balls were aching with a vengeance, and my dick kept twitching every time I remembered Naruto's little stunt. Or Naruko's. Fuck if I knew what to call it.
All I knew was I came down the throat of a bombshell nurse henge, a friend at that, and I still couldn't decide if that was the hottest or most fucked-up thing that I had ever done. Probably both.
While no more steamy surprises happened after that fiasco, much to the immense chagrin of my balls and dick, I'd had a steady parade of shinobi with a clipboard dropping by to take more of my report.
Found myself repeating the same damn story I had given to the Hokage over and over like a broken record. "Yes, I fought Anbu. No, I didn't start it. Yes, I fought the Mizukage. Yes, he's dead. No, I didn't start that either. No, I don't want to go through it one more time, unless you also plan to give me a hand under the sheets."
It wasn't very pleasant, but at least they didn't send Inoichi. With how many ANBU they had stationed to watch me—some hidden, others in laughably obvious disguises—there was no way the head of the Analysis Team wasn't aware his precious little princess had paid me a visit.
I doubted Inoichi would be any gentler with my brain when he learned all the perverted things I'd done to his innocent little girl. Probably wouldn't care much that I'd shown restraint and left Ino's chastity intact when he proceeded to fry my skull from the inside out.
Maybe I shouldn't waste time worrying about Inoichi's reaction at all. I'd already fucked Kushina Uzumaki—the Hokage's wife—and if Minato ever found out, nothing Inoichi could throw my way would compare. The real danger was Ino herself; Kushina could keep her lips sealed, but Ino was a terrible liar. So maybe I should prepare for the Yamanaka firing squad after all.
I'd spent considerable time mulling this over during my hospital stay, being alone with nothing but my thoughts. The conclusion I'd reached—after or was it before jerking one off?—was simple: don't go looking for trouble, but if opportunities presented themselves, I wouldn't turn them away. Meaning if the chance arose, I'd take Ino, consequences be damned.
Didn't know if that was a good decision made with post-nut clarity or pre-nut delusion, but a man could only restrain himself so much. Ino was too much of a hottie to let slip by.
Another visitor who'd lifted my spirits considerably was my lovely student Hanabi, accompanied by my favorite thorny-mouthed maid, Natsu. That had been a pleasant surprise. Seeing Hanabi's bright smile as she recounted her training progress, and watching Natsu struggle so hard not to be her usual prickly self in front of "Hanabi-sama"—teasing the poor maid to the edge of hissing had been endlessly entertaining and better than any painkiller.
Other than that, Shiho… Shiho was the constant. My nerd. My pregnant nerd. Stubborn little thing who wouldn't leave even when I told her to go home and rest. She was pregnant, for fuck's sake, carrying my child, and probably needed more rest than I did. My little nerd refused to budge. Sometimes that girl could be infuriatingly obstinate and so adorable when she dug her heels in like that.
Truth be told, though, I hadn't expected this many visitors. Wasn't new to missions ending in hospital stays, but having this much company was definitely different. Usually, it was just Anko, often in the bed beside mine, no less fucked up than I was.
I sighed, remembering simpler times. Wasn't bad now either, I mused as I pulled Shiho tighter against my side.
She made the cutest tiny noise but maintained her all serious and business face, focused expression as she did her best to support my weight while helping me walk. Adorable indeed.
I didn't really need her support. Pain was nothing new; it was stitched into the life of a shinobi, same as scars and bad dreams. Always present, whether from training or actual combat. You got used to it eventually. No, I didn't need her help walking, but I needed her warmth.
The world was a cold, cold place. Only a woman could warm it. Every second my arm wasn't around one was a second wasted.
I smiled and looked around as we walked down the cobbled street. Traditional Japanese-style houses lined both sides, their dark wooden frames and sloped tile roofs creating neat rows of potential homes. Most, if not all, stood empty though, their windows dark and gardens overgrown with weeds. Paper notices fluttered from several doorframes, and the whole place had an eerie, abandoned quality despite being relatively new construction.
This was the compound the Uchiha had been pushed into in the original timeline. But since no valid reason existed here, and the Hokage wasn't some paranoid old fool, the place was... empty. A ghost town.
You didn't need to be a fisherman to know something fishy was definitely going on here.
I'd sent my three raccoon summons to investigate earlier. They might be thugs, but they were shinobi raccoon thugs. They'd done their job well enough, payment in food as always, and confirmed my suspicions.
This place was being deliberately kept uninhabitable. Either through subtle methods—bureaucratic red tape, inflated permit costs, suspiciously delayed utility connections—or less subtle approaches like theft, vandalism, and strategic "accidents" that made living here impossible.
For civilians, that is.
Wasn't hard to guess who was behind this. Danzo. Old he may be, he still had his dreams. The funny thing was, he was using the same playbook as those recent thefts plaguing the village—the ones meant to make the Uchiha look bad and paint them as the cause. Was he going senile, or just lazy?
Then again, maybe I should thank the old bastard rather than throw shade at him.
Shiho looked up at the traditional structure, her eyes widening behind her glasses. "Eishin, this… it looks nice. But, uh…." She stole a glance at my face to gauge my reaction. "Isn't it a bit too big? I-I mean, you can afford it, obviously, I'm not saying you shouldn't, just… um… wouldn't it be lonely? Also, it looks — it must be expensive. You should be more thoughtful with your spending. But if you are happy with it, then…"
"It won't be lonely. Far from it." She was so cute when she tried to give advice without sounding harsh. I kissed her temple, smiled against her hair. "This is our home now. You'll be living here, too."
She froze. Glasses slid down her nose as she whipped those wide eyes at me. "What! O-our—? M-me? I-I can't—! Is it because—I don't want to be a burden to you, and—and I can take care of the baby myself! You don't need to—I mean, I wouldn't want you to feel obligated to—"
I shut her up with a kiss. When I pulled back, she was looking at me with flushed cheeks but much calmer, waiting for my guidance like the good girl I'd trained her to be. I placed my hand flat against her stomach, just below that annoying sash of hers. Her gaze followed my touch.
"This is our child," I said, caressing her still-flat belly. "Yours and mine. Which makes it my responsibility, my joy, my future." My thumb traced gentle circles against the fabric. "I want this, Shiho. I want you both."
She bit her lower lip, voice barely a whisper. "I... I just don't want you to think I'm trying to trap you or be a burden..."
"You're mine," I said firmly, my other hand tilting her chin up to meet my eyes through her small shoulders. "Not a burden, never a burden. You're a piece of my heart—my contentment, my peace, my brilliant, socially anxious, adorable little nerd. And since you're mine, all your worries, all your fears, all your stubborn quirks—they're mine to take care too." I leaned closer, voice dropping to a murmur. "No matter what excuse you come up with, I'm never letting you go."
When had it, I wondered in the back of my head, become so easy to spill my heart like this?
Shiho stared at me for a long moment, breath caught, then broke into the brightest, stupidest smile I'd ever seen. She lunged up and kissed me, laughing into my mouth, glasses crooked, giggling between words that made no sense. Her arms wrapped around my neck, clinging.
I smiled in surprise, then kissed her back properly, ignoring the pinch of pain in my ribs. Rare for Shiho to take the initiative. Precious, too.
She pulled back, still grinning, still giggling. "I can't believe — this must be a dream!" she gasped for air. "This is—this is really happening? We're really—oh god, I'm being so silly, aren't I? But I can't help it, I'm just so, so happy right now...so happy I could die."
Contagious. My grin stretched wider as my hand kept stroking her stomach. It made me want to tease her. "That so?" My voice came hoarse as my fingers pressed lower, over her womb, tracing down.
She jolted. Like flipping a switch, she went from overexcited nerd to shy, meek little thing as my hand started its descent. Shiho looked around half-panicked, and I expected her usual flimsy excuses about propriety, about public decency. But she surprisingly simply dropped her head docilely in silence.
I smiled devilishly. Yeah, I definitely wasn't giving up my little nerd for anything in the world.
As my hand slid slowly down, her breath caught in her throat. I felt the band of her panties beneath her dress and moved past them, her complete focus on my touch as I—
I pulled my hand away. "Let's go check out our new home," I said casually.
Her head snapped up, face scarlet, eyes wide. "What? T-that's… that's so…." she trailed before adding under her breath, pouting. "You are so mean."
I chuckled, gave her ass a light smack. She squeaked out a quick, "S-sorry!"
I laced my fingers with hers and walked forward, tugging her with me, toward our home.
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