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Chapter 146 - Chapter 146 : Memories We Never Lived

Morning light spilled through the wide, open window, casting a soft golden glow across the room. Astra stood quietly in the corner, her shoulder leaning against the frame, arms crossed, gaze distant. The breeze stirred the curtains gently, but she didn't move. Her eyes were fixed somewhere beyond the horizon—lost in a world far removed from the one she stood in.

Footsteps echoed lightly across the polished floor.

Kaen stepped into the room, scanning until his eyes landed on her. "There you are," he muttered, walking toward her. "I've been looking—"

He stopped beside her, frowning when she didn't react. "Astra?"

Still no response.

His brows drew together as he reached out and gently shook her by the shoulder.

Astra flinched, eyes snapping toward him. "Kaen—? I—sorry. I didn't hear you."

"You were miles away," he said, voice softer now. "Everything alright?"

She hesitated before offering a faint smile. "Just thinking."

Kaen studied her face—something flickered across his features. "You look pale," he said after a moment. Then, as she yawned behind a hand, his tone shifted with light concern. "And those dark circles… don't tell me you didn't sleep last night."

Astra looked away, the corners of her lips twitching into a faint smile. "Maybe a little."

Kaen sighed, arms folding as he studied her. "A little looks like none. Did something happen?"

Instead of answering, Astra gestured toward the chair behind him. "Sit."

He blinked at the sudden seriousness in her tone but did as told, easing into the chair. She remained standing, arms now crossed, a troubled look clouding her features.

"Kaen," she began, hesitating. "Have I ever… been possessed by a ghost before?"

His brow furrowed immediately. "What? No. Why would you even ask something like that?"

She didn't answer right away. Her voice dropped low. "Then whose memories are those I keep seeing in my nightmares? Over and over. Faces I don't know, burning buildings, people screaming for help… I've never lived through it, so how can I remember it?"

Kaen went still, his usually casual expression sobering. "Maybe…" he began slowly, choosing his words with care, "when you were little, you read something—some old tale. You were obsessed with stories like that, remember? Maybe it stuck in your mind, and even though you've forgotten it, your younger self hasn't. Sometimes, memories like that can cling."

Astra's jaw clenched. "Stop saying that, Kaen." Her voice trembled slightly. "Yes, I read a lot. Yes, I chased stories. But why is it always this one? Why only this? Why does it feel like it's getting worse each time?"

He was quiet for a long moment, then reached out and ruffled her hair gently, the way he used to when they were children. "They'll get better. I promise."

Her eyes shimmered as she looked at him. "It's been years… Will I ever be free from them?"

Before he could answer, a soft thud came from behind.

Both of them turned just in time to see Xue tumble from the edge of the bed, sleepy eyes blinking, hair mussed in every direction.

"Xue?" Astra's voice softened instantly as she bent down and scooped him up in her arms.

He blinked at her drowsily, then nestled into her shoulder, wrapping his tiny arms around her neck.

"Little Xue finally woke up, hm?" she murmured, swaying slightly as she held him. Her earlier tension began to melt away. She kissed his head gently. "Did you have a better sleep than me?"

Xue gave a soft huff against her shoulder, tiny fingers curling into her sleeve.

Kaen watched them quietly, a faint smile tugging at the corners of his lips. The earlier heaviness in the room had thinned, replaced by a tender stillness as Astra gently ran her fingers through the boy's hair, humming a soft tune under her breath—one he likely wouldn't remember, but she never forgot.

But the moment the melody reached Kaen's ears, his breath caught.

His smile faltered.

That tune—he remembered it. He used to hum it, long ago, to someone… someone he'd tried not to think about. His eyes darkened, and he turned away suddenly, blinking hard as if to push the memory back into the shadows.

"I—I'll wait outside," Kaen said, his voice a little too brisk to be casual. "You should get ready. The innkeeper mentioned there's a cleansing ritual happening nearby Shrine. They're putting up spirit lanterns—it's an old tradition meant to drive away lingering spirits."

He glanced at her, more serious now. "We agreed to join. Thought it might help… especially with the stronger ones still clinging to you."

Without waiting for a reply, he stepped out, the door clicking softly behind him.

Astra watched him go, brows furrowed faintly, but she didn't speak. Instead, she looked down at the boy in her arms. "Want to come with me, Xue?"

The child shook his head immediately, burrowing deeper into her shoulder. She arched a brow, then leaned in, whispering like she was telling him a secret. "There'll be sweets."

Xue paused.

Then, without a sound, he gave a firm little nod.

Astra chuckled, "I thought so."

———

In the dim room lit only by the morning light slanting through the window, Akira stood with both palms raised,

"I swear I didn't disappear on purpose this time, Daita. I was just—"

"Just what?" Daita snapped, arms crossed as he paced the floor. "Gone. Again. You're getting reported, Your Highness! This time, I'm telling His Majesty myself."

In the corner, Commander Zhou noisily sipped his tea…slurp…far too loud for a moment so tense.

Daita paused, face twitching. "Commander Zhou, please. That tea has suffered enough."

Zhou raised an eyebrow, utterly unbothered. "It's just getting to the good part."

"Drink it. Fast," Daita growled, pointing without even looking.

Akira quickly stepped forward, voice low but urgent. "If you report this, His Majesty might summon me back… and lock me in again. You know how hard that will be. And how lonely."

Daita turned away, trying to ignore him—but he didn't leave.

Akira continued, "If I'm stuck behind palace walls, it'll be harder for the rest of you to finish this mission. Especially now."

Daita's eyes narrowed. "You're talking about the mission, and yet you keep disappearing without a trace. I don't trust you anymore. And as for the mission—Commander Zhou and I can handle it just fine."

Akira didn't flinch. "This demon… it's not an ordinary one. We both know it. And I might have a plan. A secret one. If it works, we could end this quickly."

Daita stared at him. "What kind of plan?"

Akira smiled faintly. "I called it a secret plan for a reason."

There was a beat of silence.

"Another secret?!" Daita let out a long, theatrical groan and flopped back onto the bed, arms thrown dramatically over his head. "Crown Prince, you're like a walking mystery scroll! Unreadable, sealed tight, and covered in red ink warnings!"

From the corner, Commander Zhou didn't even look up from his tea. "His Highness isn't wrong."

Daita shot him a glare. "You're not helping."

Zhou raised his cup with a shrug. "I didn't say I was trying to."

Daita sat up with a groan, brushing his hair back. "Alright, alright. But this is the last time—I can't keep flirting with a spy anymore," he muttered under his breath.

"I swear," Daita grumbled into the pillow, "I won't die until I unravel every last secret you're hiding. They drive me mad."

Akira chuckled softly, folding his arms. "You'll live a very, very long life then."

But almost instantly, the amusement faded from his face. He began pacing across the room.

"We need to end this mission quickly," he said, voice low and urgent. "Before it spreads. And for that, Daita, I need you to do something."

Daita leaned forward, more alert now. "Name it."

Akira stopped pacing.

"I need you to infiltrate the Bureau of Spirit Affairs."

Daita blinked. "What?"

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