(Erza POV)
Zani particles consumed an absurd amount of mana.
People liked to call it a free source of energy, but that was nothing more than a convenient lie. Those who possessed a core—mages, dragons, even beings close to divinity—were never able to draw out its true nature.
I was no exception.
No matter how many times I observed it, no matter how deeply I analyzed its flow, Zani refused to make sense. It did not respond like mana. It did not obey laws. It simply existed—silent, heavy, and dangerous.
Only one person had ever truly understood it.
Zareth.
The ancient scriptures mentioned her name only in fragments, as if even history was afraid of writing too much about her. They spoke vaguely of Zani, never explaining how it should be used, nor what price must be paid. All they recorded was the result—miracles that should have been impossible.
From my own research, I came to understand one thing.
Zani was not magic.
It was a particle—a different kind of existence altogether.
They said that when God began the creation of the universe, He released two natures of energy into existence. One was the God Particles, pure and absolute, the foundation of order and creation.
The other was Zani.
Absolute light could not exist without absolute darkness. Creation itself demanded an opposite. And so, in the act of creating the universe, God also—perhaps unknowingly—brought forth a power that did not belong to order.
A power capable of replication.
A power without a defined nature.
A power that even God did not fully name.
That was Zani.
I exhaled slowly.
"To be honest… I don't truly understand it," I admitted quietly, my voice echoing in the empty chamber.
Understanding had never been my strength. Power was.
All I knew was what Zareth had done.
She used her own body as the medium.
Her flesh, her core, her very existence became the foundation of her spell. She did not search for a safer method—she became the method.
If that was how she perfected her magic…
Then I had no choice.
"I'll do the same," I said.
There was no hesitation in my voice this time.
I would recreate what Zareth did. I would turn myself into the vessel and force Zani to obey—even if only once.
All for one purpose.
Yuuta.
I looked at him, lying there so quietly, his body marked by scars that should never have existed. Each one told a story of pain, of survival, of wounds that time had failed to heal.
"I'll heal you," I whispered.
Not just your body.
Not just your scars.
Your life.
I would give him a future without trauma. A life where he no longer had to carry pain as proof of his existence.
And if the price for that future was my own body—
Then so be it.
I would bear it.
No matter what it took.
I shifted my mana core.
No—I replaced it.
The familiar warmth of mana faded, and in its place, something colder took root. The Zani Core—a core I had only recently developed after meeting Yuuta. Even now, I did not understand how it was born, or why my body had accepted it so easily.
All I knew was the result.
It raised my class threat level beyond calculation.
It stabilized my kingdom.
It ended slient nightmare wars before they could even begin.
And yet… the cost was terrifying.
Using it drained me far more than ordinary mana ever had. It was not meant to be used freely. Perhaps it was never meant to be used at all.
But I had no choice.
I looked at Yuuta.
His breathing was shallow but steady. His body bore the marks of battles he should never have fought—scars that told stories of pain he never spoke about.
"I have to do this," I murmured.
I steadied myself and closed my eyes.
To use Zani, I first needed to find God Particles. Zani did not exist alone—it was always bound to them. Just as light could not exist without darkness, Zani followed God Particles wherever creation existed.
I reached outward with my senses.
Slowly.
Carefully.
When I felt them, it was… strange.
"It's like breathing," I whispered. "Fresh air."
God Particles had always been there. In every living thing. In every act of creation.
They existed not because they were summoned—but because existence itself demanded them.
"I found you."
Guided by my aura, I drew them in.
They flowed toward the center of my chest, into the core embedded deep within my heart. The moment they entered, my body trembled. I separated them carefully—splitting light from darkness—isolating a single thread of Zani.
Just one.
"That's enough," I told myself.
This was not destruction.
This was creation.
"I'll shape you," I said softly, "into something new."
Something closer to a demi–True God than a spell.
I opened my eyes briefly and spat into my palm.
Then I closed them again.
Focusing.
Guiding.
The particles followed my will, slipping into my hand. The moment they connected, a heavy pressure descended upon me. Darkness gathered around my body, swallowing the room, as if the world itself had stepped back.
My presence drifted.
Into a void.
Cold. Endless. Silent.
And then—light.
My hand began to glow. The saliva in my palm twisted, transformed, reshaped into something that should not exist.
The spell was successful.
I slowly opened my eyes.
The glowing substance pulsed gently, almost alive. It trembled, sending a clear message into my mind—an instinct shared by all spells born of will.
It wanted a name.
"Yes," I said quietly. "Every spell needs one."
A name to identify itself.
A name to define its existence.
I studied it for a moment longer.
"…Meloni."
The glow steadied.
The spell accepted it.
And in that moment, a new creation was born.
I used the substance in my palm like a serum, moving with deliberate care as I applied it to Yuuta's body. I began at his chest, where the scars were deepest and most cruel, then worked my way outward—across his shoulders, down his arms, and over every mark that time had failed to erase. I continued until my hands reached his fingers, then slowly traced my way down, covering him from fingertip to toe.
All the while, I was careful not to disturb Elena.
Her small form rested nearby, her breathing soft and even. I restrained my aura, dulled my presence, and made sure not even a ripple of power reached her.
The moment the serum touched Yuuta's skin, it reacted.
Meloni began to glow.
The light was gentle at first, then slowly spread, sinking beneath his skin instead of spilling outward. It lingered there, as if it had found a place it belonged. I watched, barely daring to breathe, as the glow remained inside his body.
Then the healing began.
The scars responded almost immediately. Old wounds that should never have healed started to soften. The jagged lines blurred, their edges dissolving as Meloni worked silently within him, rewriting what pain had carved into his flesh.
"It's working," I whispered.
The words slipped out before I realized it.
As I watched, something struck me without warning.
Happiness.
Not relief, and not pride—but something deeper. Something I had not allowed myself to feel in a very long time. My chest tightened as the emotion spread, warm and overwhelming.
The last time I had felt this way was when Elena and Yuri spoke their first words. That moment—brief and fragile—had been the last time I remembered smiling without restraint.
And now, here it was again.
The man I loved was being healed.
No—he was being reborn.
My vision blurred, and I reached out instinctively, as if afraid this moment might disappear if I did not hold onto it.
Then the light vanished.
"What…?" I murmured.
Meloni disappeared from his body without warning. The glow that had filled him extinguished instantly, leaving no trace behind. The spell I had created—the one born from my will, my body, my resolve—was gone.
Consumed.
Yuuta's scars pulsed once, faintly, and then fell completely still.
For a moment, my mind went blank.
I could not understand what I was seeing. I could not comprehend what had just happened.
"Meloni…?" I whispered.
There was no response.
Only Yuuta's quiet breathing filled the room, steady and unaware.
And within my chest, something cold and unfamiliar began to take shape.
Then I saw it clearly.
Yuuta's body began to respond in earnest, and my eyes widened as I leaned closer. The scars across his chest trembled faintly before changing, their dark, jagged edges slowly softening as fresh skin began to form beneath them. The healing did not rush—it moved carefully, almost respectfully, spreading outward from his chest toward his arms. I watched as the marks along his fingers faded one after another, and then further down, several scars across his body disappeared completely.
For one brief moment, joy flooded my chest so violently that I almost forgot how to breathe.
But that feeling did not last.
My gaze sharpened as I noticed what remained. The older scars—the deepest ones, carved into him long before I ever entered his life—did not fade. They resisted the healing entirely, standing firm as if they had rejected Meloni's power. The contrast was cruel, unmistakable, and devastating.
The joy I had felt only seconds ago collapsed into fury.
"No…" I whispered under my breath, my fingers curling involuntarily.
I had been overjoyed for a heartbeat, believing I had succeeded, only to realize the truth immediately afterward. This was not a partial success. This was a failure—an absolute one. I had poured a year's worth of energy into this spell, convinced that I could finally erase his pain, and yet the most important wounds remained untouched.
My gaze dropped slowly.
Yuuta's shadow moved.
That single distortion was enough to ignite everything I had been holding back.
Without hesitation, I thrust my hand into the darkness beneath him and seized something solid. The shadow resisted for a fraction of a second before I tore the black figure free and hurled it across the room with overwhelming force. The impact was violent, stone exploding as the body smashed into the wall, cracks spreading outward from the point of collision.
Dust filled the air.
Allen groaned as he pulled himself free from the shattered stone, rubbing his arm as if irritated rather than afraid.
"You disgusting intruder," he said with a sneer. "Do you not fear death?"
I turned toward him slowly, my expression devoid of emotion.
"Do I need to.?" I replied coldly.
The change in him was immediate.
His face darkened, arrogance draining away as recognition struck. His body stiffened before he dropped to his knees, then pressed his hands together in a posture of prayer, his head lowering instinctively.
"My mistress," he said, his voice trembling now. "Your lovely servant has heard your call."
I took a step closer, the air around me growing heavy.
"Tell me, Allen," I said evenly, "which sin did you commit without telling me?"
"I… I…" His entire body shook as he knelt there. "I breathe in your presence, my queen."
"Wrong," I said, clenching my fist.
My voice remained calm, but the pressure behind it was unmistakable.
"You ruined my energy," I continued. "You consumed Meloni—my creation."
"My queen, I didn't know!" Allen cried desperately. "I was only following my master's order. I was told to remain within the shadow!"
"Because of you," I said, each word sharp and deliberate, "I lost an entire month of energy in a single moment. I believed I would heal him."
I stared down at him, my gaze freezing.
"And you devoured it."
"I… I am sorry, my mistress," he begged. "There has been a mistake—"
His apology meant nothing.
Frozen mana wrapped around my fists, forming solid, glacial boxing gloves that radiated killing intent. I moved before he could say another word, my fist crashing into him with enough force to shatter the wall behind him once again. Stone cracked, frost exploded outward, and his body slammed back violently.
Then another punch followed.
And another.
I did not restrain myself.
Each blow carried my rage, my grief, and the weight of my failure, the frozen gloves striking harder than steel as Allen was driven deeper into the ruined stone. Frost coated the cracks, the room trembling under the force of my assault.
I beat him without mercy.
Because forgiveness was no longer something he deserved.
I threw Allen to the floor without another glance.
His body struck the ground heavily, the sound dull and lifeless as cracks spread beneath him. Frost clung to the broken stone, and dust lingered in the air, but I did not wait to see whether he moved. I had already turned away, my attention spent.
My body felt unbearably heavy as I walked toward the sofa—new, untouched, and absurdly out of place amid the destruction. Sunlight filtered through the shattered walls, pale and indifferent, illuminating the chaos I had created. Every step drained what little strength remained in me. The Zani core within my chest pulsed weakly, unstable after the power I had burned in a single afternoon.
I lowered myself onto the sofa.
The moment I sat down, exhaustion crashed over me—not pain, not regret, just a deep, hollow emptiness. I had lost too much energy, far more than I should have, and my body demanded rest without mercy.
"I need sleep," I said quietly.
Outside, the afternoon continued as if nothing had happened. Inside the room, Yuuta's breathing remained steady, Elena slept on, and a demon lay broken on the floor. The silence was heavy, thick with unresolved consequences.
I leaned back, my eyes closing.
Sleep claimed me before I could think further, before doubt or reflection could take root. I drifted away without resistance, leaving behind shattered stone, frozen blood, and unanswered sins.
The sun was still high when darkness took me.
To be continued.
Merry Christmas to all of you, my dear reading family 🎄🎁
Every one of you is a part of the Konuari family, and being part of this family truly makes me feel blessed.
I often say that I don't really have family or friends—but when I open Webnovel, I realize how wrong that is. Because there you all are, wishing me, supporting me, and standing by me.
Each and every one of you has been there for me. Even when my novel wasn't perfect, you guided me, commented, encouraged me—and now here we are, celebrating Christmas together.
I'm truly happy beyond what words can express. It's a joy greater than what a mortal heart can hold.
Merry Christmas, Konuari family 🎄
Because you don't just read this story—you belong to this family.
And yes, sorry for the delay in the mass release 😅
Santa ran into some trouble… he forgot to recheck the chapters.
Thank you for always being here ❤️