Finally, the day came when Ryan knew he was as recovered as he could be, given the circumstances.
He was no longer stuck in bed, no longer dependent on others for his most basic needs. He had regained his strength, his body healing incredibly well, a testament to the fine care he had been given. But his heart, he knew, would carry the scars forever. The physical scars may have healed, but the emotional ones stayed with him, reminding him of his loss and his powerlessness.
He encountered Jane in the library, a large room dominated by towering rows of old books, the atmosphere thick with the smell of leather and paper. The silence within the room was almost palpable, interrupted only by the faint sound of page turning. It was a room that told of knowledge, power, and history, a room that Jane dominated with a casual elegance. She sat behind a great mahogany desk, its highly polished surface reflecting the beam of sunlight that fell upon her raven hair, causing it to shine like highly polished obsidian. She glanced up as he came in, her sharp, angular face relaxing a little as she saw him. Her grey eyes, those piercing grey eyes that seemed always to watch him, to judge him, relaxed for one moment, replaced by an expression he couldn't quite identify.
"Ryan," she said, and her voice was a low, musical hum that vibrated within him. "You look. stronger." It was not a question, but a statement, an observation with a touch of satisfaction.
"I am," he responded, his tone firm, his eyes steady. He stood ramrod straight, his shoulders braced, and looked her square in the eyes. "I need to discuss something with you, Jane. Something about Hazel."
Jane's face changed, her expression more reserved, the softness gone, replaced by a cold calculating glint. She stood up from the desk, her hourglass shape moving with an elegance that was at once beautiful and deadly. She approached him, her body filling the space between them, her grey eyes, those eyes that seemed always to be watching him, searching him, studying him, locked on his face, as if attempting to measure his every thought and feeling.
"About Hazel," she replied, her tone studiously neutral, a mask that hid the feelings underneath.
"I can't let it go, Jane," Ryan declared, his fists clenched at his sides, his voice taut with contained emotion. "I can't just act as if it didn't occur. I have to do something. I have to avenge her. And I need your assistance." He bared his vulnerability to her, placing his need at her doorstep.
Jane's perfect lips broke into a slow, mysterious smile, a smile that ran shivers down Ryan's spine. It was a triumph smile, a possession smile, a smile that said there was a game about to be played, a bargain about to be made. "Help you? Of course I'll help you, Ryan. Anything for you." She took his hand, cool and smooth as it felt. Her fingers locked with his, her hold firm, possessive, as if taking possession. "But. everything has a price, doesn't it?"
Ryan scowled, bewildered. He had been looking for sympathy, comprehension, maybe even a shared mourning. But this. this seemed like a deal, a detached, calculating bargain. "What do you mean, a price? I'll pay you back, somehow I can. Money, anything." He was willing to give up anything in his ability, anything material, anything that could be paid back with money.
Jane shook her head, her smile growing, her eyes flashing with an intensity that fueled Ryan's growing unease. "Oh, my sweet, innocent Ryan. I don't need your money. I need something much more precious. Something irreplaceable. Something that is uniquely yours to give." Her grip on his hand tightened, her fingers mapping the curves of his palm, her touch sending a peculiar mixture of warmth and fear through him, a troubling combination of desire and fright.
"I want you, Ryan," she said, her voice a low, sensual whisper that seemed to envelop him, holding him captive to her. "Totally. Totally. You will be mine, and mine alone. You will trust me, obey me, and depend on me for everything. Your life, your future, your very existence will be in my hands." Her eyes blazed, burning into his.
Ryan gazed at her, his mind spinning. This wasn't the Jane he was familiar with. Or maybe it was, but a part of her he never knew existed, a part which lay hidden below the surface, now out in all its ferocity. This was someone else, someone strong, controlling, and absolutely set on ruling his fate. The proposal lay there, the means to exact vengeance on Hazel, to honor her memory. But at what price. the price being his freedom, his independence, his own self. It was an intimidating cost, a sacrifice that would alter the trajectory of his life for all eternity.
He recalled his father's words the previous night before the accident—words that had tormented him ever since, ringing in the quiet hours of his recuperation: "Don't reach beyond your limits, son. That way lies suffering." He hadn't known what to make of it at the time, brushing it off as the conservative prudence of an older man. But after the accident, it became horribly obvious. The world wasn't fair. It never had been. And he could do nothing about it, a pawn in a larger game controlled by forces other than himself. But here, Jane was presenting him with an opportunity to take back that power, to become something greater.
A silence as long as time hung between them, interrupted only by the gentle, synchronized cadence of their breathing. Ryan struggled with his feelings, caught between his sorrow and his realization of Jane's attachment for him. He knew, suddenly, that he wasn't neutral about her. He had always been attracted to her strength, her brains, her unyielding spirit. He recalled the hours upon hours they'd spent as children together, the dreams shared, the unspoken bond that had always been between them. He had even had a secret crush on her, one he had never dared to act on, thinking himself not good enough for someone so amazing.
But now, things had changed. His world had been broken, and he was forced to make a decision he never imagined having to make. He could hold onto his past life, the image of Hazel, and stay a victim, helpless to change things. Or he could seize this new world, take Jane up on her offer, and be someone different, someone who was able to get his life on track.
"There will always be one girl besides you, Jane," Ryan stated, his voice raw with emotion. "Hazel Hargrove will be in my heart forever. But I. I want to live. I want to be strong. I want to be the kind of man you think I can be. I. I accept your offer."