After Aurelia's sudden announcement that she wished to take leave, explaining it was due to something concerning her mother, everyone reacted with concern—everyone except me. I had no real understanding of what was happening, though I could tell it was connected to the dark circles beneath her eyes.
"Did it get worse?" my mother asked, her voice laced with concern. Her eyes trembled as though she wished it were not what she feared.
"It... did," Aurelia murmured, her voice numb, her eyes lifeless as though she had surrendered everything.
At her words, everyone was shocked, except for me and the maids.
I've no idea what's going on....
"All right, I shall grant you leave for a few days..." my mother said softly; her voice was calm, but her expression was tinged with sorrow.
"Thank you," Aurelia said calmly, then resumed her usual nightly routine as she rose and left the dining room to begin her patrol.
After she left, everyone rose in silence and went about their respective duties or personal interests. Sana escorted me to my room, as Rina had asked her to do for the night, since Rina wished to join Aurelia on the patrol.
As I walked beside Sana, who kept pace with me, I asked in a childlike voice, "Sana, why did Aurelia ask to leave for a few days? Did something happen to her mother?"
Hearing my sudden question, Sana tried to answer with innocence, hoping not to trouble the child beside her, yet her voice was laced with sorrow she could not conceal. "Erm… Aurelia's mother is gravely ill, and there are no treatments in the world that can help her. Knowing she cannot save her, Aurelia wishes to spend what time she has left with her mother before the worst comes."
"I see," I said, forcing a sorrowful expression, though I felt nothing of the sort. Did she really have to phrase it that way instead of speaking plainly? I may look like a child, but given my true age, I could well be her ancestor—no, at this point, I could be the founder of an entire nation.
We remained silent until we reached my room. After that, Sana left me, and I was alone.
After a couple of minutes, I heard a knock. Knowing who it was, I answered calmly, "You may come in."
At my reply, the door opened, and the one who entered revealed herself to be Yukino. Unlike her usual maid's uniform, tonight she wore her sleepwear—a light garment that was slightly transparent.
"Young Master, it is time for your bath," Yukino said calmly, as though she were long accustomed to this routine. Ever since I turned three, Yukino had worn this light, slightly transparent garment whenever she came to my room to help me bathe, both in the morning and at night.
"Alright," I said calmly; by now, I was already used to it. I remembered the first time she had done this. I'd told her I could manage on my own, but she had insisted on helping me, just in case something happened—like me drowning. Who would drown themselves, anyway? Best not to ask. I tried resisting at first, but that hadn't ended well, so I'd eventually given up.
As she helped me undress in the bathroom, she washed my back and front. It felt as though I were being reduced to a pet. Well, if it were any other child, I suppose they wouldn't think much of it… sigh. Soon, I slipped into the bathtub and simply relaxed while Yukino took my clothes away. She returned with a towel and a fresh set of clothes meant for sleeping. When I got out, she dried me carefully with the towel.
As she was wiping me down, I could hear Lust and Envy screaming in my mind. But I was already used to it; every morning and night we go through this, and those two have long since made their presence something I've grown accustomed to.
"IT'S JUST NOT FAIR! IT SHOULD HAVE BEEN ME!" Envy screamed in my mind.
"MAN, JUST ASK HER CUTELY TO SHOWER WITH YOU IN THE BATHTUB!" Lust shouted in my mind.
Those two kept screaming the same things every morning and night, to the point that I'd grown bored of their reactions and no longer bothered replying to them in my mind.
As Yukino finished dressing me, she asked gently, "Young master, would you like me to read you a bedtime story?"
"No need, I can sleep on my own," I replied calmly, my expression indifferent.
"Alright…" Yukino said sadly as she left my room. I still didn't understand why she kept asking me that.
Once I was certain she had gone, I pressed my ear to the door to make sure no one lingered outside. Then I removed my clothes and sat cross-legged, naked on the floor. Breathing in and out steadily, I concentrated on drawing one of the world's energy sources—mana—from the air into my body. Unlike the novels I remembered, where practitioners absorbed mana and shaped it into circles or other constructs, I simply drew it in directly, cleansing away its impurities and keeping only the purest essence while discarding the rest.
As I did so, pain rippled through my body while I guided the pure mana to flow throughout every part of me—the veins, the organs such as the heart and lungs, even down to the muscle fibres and the brain itself. The pain was not only from my body being weak, but also from the process of purifying the mana already within me from the previous days. Since I practised this every night and during any spare time, the mana inside me was already pure, yet I persisted in refining it further, condensing it to create an even stronger, higher form of mana.
Was this truly necessary? Perhaps not for others, who could purify mana and form stronger reserves through their own family breathing techniques or cultivation methods. But for me, it was essential. I used a unique method—one that combined several approaches, including some known only in the farthest reaches of the cosmos.
As I continued, my head throbbed violently, screaming with pain. Although my goal was to develop a stronger mana circle method, I was also conditioning my veins to withstand the strain. The first time I attempted this, I had nearly killed myself, and it had taken a long time to reach this point. Now, however, it felt as though I was merging with the mana itself, letting it flow freely throughout my entire being.
After a while, I stopped. Slowly, I opened my eyes. During the meditation, all my senses had been focused solely on feeling the mana within my body. Because of that, I hadn't noticed anything else—the warm trickle of blood running from the corners of my eyes, the steady drip from my nose, or the metallic taste of blood I was spitting from my mouth. My body felt utterly strained, as though I had climbed thousands of mountains in a single day with nothing but a frail body to carry me.
I washed up again, this time on my own, and put back on the clothes I had taken off. Of course, every movement brought pain, as my frail body strained with the effort, but at least it wasn't like last time—when Yukino had found me looking little better than a corpse, covered in blood. Having learnt from that, I tried not to push myself as recklessly as before.
Once I had finished dressing, I went to bed and let myself drift into sleep. Tomorrow, I will cut down on my reading and focus more on training my body and mind. If I truly wished to continue with this, I would need to strengthen both.
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The Next Day — Morning.
Aurelia walked out of the Destenebres Mansion's main gate, having only needed to deliver a form requesting a few days' leave of absence. Once through the gate, she followed the road until she reached a nearby town, not far from the estate. She was dressed simply in a plain white shirt, long leather-like trousers, and sturdy boots of the same make, carrying her luggage with her as well.
As she walked through the town, she stopped in front of an old-looking building.
She stepped inside the building. Within, a woman sat who looked frail and weakened, her body carrying the weary marks of premature ageing. Though her condition had made her seem far older than she truly was, traces of her youth still lingered. Her long, rich golden hair fell about her shoulders, though here and there it had dulled and lost its lustre. Her eyes, a warm brown, seemed faint and tired, yet their colour still held a gentle light.
"Mum…" Aurelia said weakly, her voice trembling as she looked at her mother's condition. Worry and fear gripped her at the sight of her mother's frail state.
"I'm still fine—cough, cough—haha…" Aurelia's mother tried to reassure her, forcing a smile as if to boast of her strength, but blood rose to her lips as she strained herself.
Seeing her mother cough up blood, Aurelia hurried to the household water dispenser. She took a small magic stone and fitted it into the slot, then placed a cup beneath the spout. A moment later, clear water began to flow, filling the cup. As soon as it was ready, she rushed back to her mother's side and gently helped her drink, tilting the cup carefully so the water passed slowly into her mouth.
Gulp… gulp… gulp… Each swallow sounded heavy in the silence.
After drinking nearly a quarter of the cup, her mother looked up with a bright expression and said, "Thank you, sweetie."
"Mum, you shouldn't exert yourself, or else you will…" Aurelia's voice faltered, weak and trembling as tears threatened to form in her eyes. But before they could fall, her mother gently brushed them away, her expression calm and warm as she replied.
"Haha, I won't die that easily. Anyway, since you're here, let's not talk about such things—your mommy would only grow sad. Instead, tell me how you've been. I want to hear how my daughter is doing," she replied with a gentle smile.
Aurelia wanted to complain about her mother's condition, but seeing how her mother had taken the initiative to ask about her instead, she gave up the thought. Faced with that warm smile, Aurelia relented and began to recount her experiences: her training as an apprentice knight, her transfer to Madam Cesline, the moment she had attempted to assassinate Cesline's child, and how, after her failure, Madam Cesline had chosen to forgive her. From there, she continued her story, speaking of how she had lived up to the present day.
"Madam Cesline is truly kind. It touches me to know my daughter would go so far for my sake, but you mustn't take a life for me. I've already accepted my fate, and what I want most is for you to live your life well—not burden yourself by living it for me. I cherish your feelings, but please, don't ever do that again. Instead, serve her and her son with all your heart," her mother said gently, her voice full of warmth.
"Cough, cough…"
No sooner had she finished speaking than she was overcome by a weak cough.
"Mum…" Aurelia reached for the cup, ready to help her drink, but her mother gently raised a hand and pushed it away.
"I'm all right, it's only a bad cough… cough, cough…" she said weakly, though the fit lingered as she continued to cough.
"Please drink," Aurelia said firmly, her voice edged with concern for her mother's health.
Her mother gave in and drank as Aurelia once more helped her, tilting the cup carefully to let the water flow slowly into her mouth.
"By the way, Mum, how did you send the letter to the Destenebres? Don't tell me you exert—" Aurelia began, already fearing the conclusion she was about to reach, but her words were cut off.
"No, I didn't. Nimmy helped me deliver the letter," her mother interrupted gently, speaking with calm assurance.
Aurelia calmed down as she listened to her mother's words. Nimmy was her mother's caretaker, hired with the savings her father had left behind after his death in battle. Her father had been a knight, and Aurelia had always looked up to him as a role model. It was because of him that she yearned to become a knight herself—not only to follow in his footsteps, but also because a knight's salary was high enough to support her mother, at least for a time, before her illness claimed her.
"Since you've returned, I'd like to stroll through the streets with my daughter. It's been such a long time," her mother said with a smile.
"Alright," Aurelia replied without refusal, knowing her mother would only keep nagging if she resisted. She then brought over a wheelchair—an ingenious invention—and carefully lifted her mother, settling her gently into the seat.
She also fastened a water bag onto the wheelchair.
After that, she pushed the wheelchair with her mother sitting on it, out of the building, and slowly stroll around the streets while pushing the wheelchair.
As they strolled, Aurelia stopped at street stalls to buy food, sharing small bites with her mother as she gently pushed the wheelchair along. From time to time, her mother would cough up blood, and Aurelia would quickly reach for the water bag, carefully helping her drink in slow sips. Each time, Aurelia suggested they return home so her mother could rest, but her mother only smiled, reassuring her to continue—she wished to savour this walk with her daughter. Knowing how stubborn her mother could be, Aurelia yielded, and so they carried on strolling until night finally fell.
When they returned home, Aurelia lifted her mother from the wheelchair and settled her gently onto a chair. After that, she fetched a bucket of water and slowly began to remove her mother's clothing.
"To think my own daughter would one day strip her mother bare… I must be such a bad mother to have raised a daughter like this," her mother teased.
Once her mother was undressed, Aurelia took a cloth, dipped it into the cold water in the bucket, and began gently wiping her mother's body, ignoring her mother's teasing remarks.
Once she had finished wiping her mother's body, Aurelia fetched a clean set of sleeping clothes from the wardrobe and helped her mother dress.
Aurelia then fetched another clean bucket of water, undressed, and used a fresh cloth to wash herself. Afterwards, she dressed in a new set of clothes from the luggage she had brought with her.
"My daughter looks so beautiful. I suppose I won't have to worry about finding her a husband in the future," her mother teased with a proud smile as she watched the whole process.
Aurelia calmly carried her mother to the bed and gently laid her down, ignoring her teasing remark. Her mother had always teased her since she was a child, but that was not the reason she remained silent. She ignored the words because they felt as though her mother was unconcerned about her own dying, and that thought ached in Aurelia's heart.
They both lay on the bed and began a quiet mother-and-daughter talk before sleep.
"Are you living well?" her mother asked with a gentle smile, her gaze drifting to the window at her left, where the night sky shimmered with stars.
"Yes," Aurelia replied, her eyes fixed on the ceiling as she reflected on her mother's question for a few seconds.
"That's good," her mother said with a gentle smile before drifting off to sleep.
Aurelia noticed her mother had fallen asleep, yet she remained staring at the ceiling. Fear lingered in her chest, for during their stroll through the streets she had seen just how much her mother's illness had worsened. All she wished for was that her mother might live a little longer. With those thoughts weighing on her mind, she eventually drifted into sleep as well.
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Meanwhile, back at my home.
I was naked, and blood was pouring from me in great loss.
I had thought that if I tried to cultivate mana into my body, I would be fine. After all, I had trained both body and mind a great deal today, and even managed to finish another book. But I overestimated this body's endurance. I forgot that the body I now inhabit is far weaker than my original one, back in the days when I experimented with mana cultivation methods. At present, I could not progress with my training at all. When I attempted to draw mana into this body, already exhausted from the day's efforts—even if they were not truly intense, for this is still the body of a child—the result was disastrous. It felt as though my muscles were being torn apart, my bones crushed, and my brain squeezed to the point of bursting. Through this pain, I have learnt a new lesson: it is best to rest after putting this frail body through exercise, before attempting my usual cultivation method of absorbing mana from the surroundings, purifying it, and condensing it into a stronger, refined form within me.
It was like a frail, exhausted body, worn from climbing a thousand mountains, being forced to climb a thousand more… truly, a lesson learnt.
"Damn, you really are stupid," Wraith said in a mocking tone within my mind.
I ignored him and forced myself to clean up the mess, take a shower, and put on the same clothes I had set aside before attempting tonight's training. With my body utterly exhausted, I went straight to bed and fell into sleep. Damn it… I'll have to take this slowly, I thought, just before drifting off.
As I slept, the authority of Sloth stirred, and the mana within my body was slowly drawn into the work of healing me. I felt torn muscles knitting themselves back together, bones that had cracked rejoining and binding once more, and even my mind clearing as my brain gradually returned to its proper state. Yet with every fragment restored, waves of pain tore through me. My teeth clenched as the healing sent sharp signals to my mind, forcing me to endure the agony coursing through every part of my body. Damn it! I screamed inwardly, struggling to stay asleep while bearing the torment of my body mending itself piece by piece. I knew then that this pain would haunt me throughout the night.