Ultimately, everyone must be responsible for themselves. To deny the ability of humans to choose for themselves is to make them slaves.
The only thing I am guilty of is underestimating the enemy and relying on half-knowledge.
...
While there is also some pity for those killed that night, there is more for those who mindlessly follow, those who do not think for themselves, those who are not allowed and never taught. There are many. And I get the feeling that there are even more in the Fire Nation.
There is also the fact to consider that Mai, after last night, will need some time to assemble all of this new information about her brother and myself. It is easier to concentrate on the less world-shattering revelations of the night, I imagine. It has been a truth of my life for so long that the improbability of it no longer concerns me. I am here. I live.
Life is change.
"How'd you manage to piss her off that much?" Katsuo asks from behind me.
I don't immediately turn to face him as I empty the last of my tea and get to chopping up the readied sea prune before me. Buniq must have been intending to cook up a stew.
Quickly, with a few precise bending motions, the prune is in bite-sized pieces. I hear a sigh, as I add it to the stew. The pot above the fire will need a few hours now, to be palatable for our delicate companion's taste buds. I taste-test the seasoning. Very delicate, presumably with Peter in mind. As a child, he will be very unused to the taste, and even though it is edible, I won't force him. Besides, this is a variation of the Northern Watertribe's most famous broth, and so I'm curious to see the reception of my travelling companions.
"We spoke openly yesterday," I say, getting to my feet, "It's been long-coming."
Katsuo frowns at me. "Why are you travelling together, then?"
"There was necessity for it. And the brat…"
He laughs softly. "So you do have a heart."
I am silent for a moment. "Don't tell anyone."
"No worries. No one would believe me anyhow."
"Right. Let's get a look at those traps, then, shall we?"
He nods, and we move to shore where Buniq is waiting. It seems she is taking Hakoda's suggestions to heart. Good. The more capable benders are in the Bay, the less pirates or Fire Nation will manage to enter.
It is only common sense.
...
"Kaito," Bato says, "Hakoda wants to speak with you alone."
Well. Lovely, doesn't that sound ominous? I tap my pipe to the stone I'm sitting on to empty out the ashes then I move around the fireplace to Hakoda. He stands at my approach and beckons me to follow.
Once we are clear of all others and potentially listening ears, he turns to face me.
"You intend to bring two Fire Nation nobles into the city of Ba Sing Se? Three, if you count the child you have an attachment to. Not to mention three – or is it four – pirates?"
So the cat's out of the bag, then. "It sounds so unreasonable when you put it like that."
He raises his brows. "Does it?"
I sigh. "It does. But all of us fear prosecution in the form of the Fire Nation princess, Azula. And I have reason to believe that her brother, the exiled prince will be in the city. So, no matter who else joins him there, it will be the centre of pivotal events in the war. Azula is dangerous and clever enough to make your presence here obsolete. More people, capable of successfully standing in her way, standing in her way would be beneficial to us all."
"I see."
"You… do?" His silence is telling.
Finally, he opens his mouth to respond. "I do. Now tell me about my children."
"I can only tell you what I've observed."
"That's a given."
"I'm not very observant."
"I find that hardly believable."
"Suit yourself," I shrug, having gained enough time to order my thoughts. It has been some time since I last saw them, after all. "Sokka… is learning to be responsible for more than his own circumstances. He's already very good at it. He is innovative and has his heart in the right place. That is, if you trust my judgement on that. He's a good fighter. Far better than me without my bending and when he is up against a bender, he accounts very well for their advantage."
Hakoda's focus does not waver. "And his strategy?"
"In the spur of the moment, I'd follow his over my own."
He hums. "And Katara?"
I sigh. "She doesn't like me much, so what I can tell you won't be who she is most of the time."
He waits.
"Right. She's bossy. Unlikely to trust. Hurt easily. Cares deeply. Incredibly determined to get what she wants, as Pakku might have told you already. She's a prodigious bender. She hates liars. She hates good liars even more. She doesn't often give second chances."
"But she gave one to you?"
"Once I had shown her that I wasn't evil."
That startles him into laughter.
...
Mai and I are not on speaking terms at the moment. This does not stop her from dumping her brother on me to babysit as she goes off with Circus Girl to do… whatever they do.
Babysitting a grown-up in a child's body is an odd task. I take care to allow him agency, but at the same time, when he climbs onto a shaky pile of rocks to look into one of the pots above the fire, I need to grab his shirt before he falls face first into the fire.
I'm about to set him down beside me, when the rocks suddenly merge into a pedestal with a small handhold. Gorou. Nice of him.
I set the brat down again and ignore his irritated look as he begins to climb his specially crafted lookout onto the food he refuses to eat. It makes me smile.
My eyes seek out Gorou who has already gone back to his task of enforcing the docks the warriors built. Well, then. He's certainly attempting to secure goodwill. We shall see where it leads us.
..
Another evening is spent around the fireplace, getting pissed. Only this time, Circus Girl does not seem to be in the mood for the juggling she did the previous night. Or the smiling.
That was a nice change.
I've wandered off some time after I realised that I would not be able to see the light of day in the morning without a severe headache if I didn't stop then, and had loads of water to drink.
I've been followed.
Two Fire Nation nobles and a waterbender standing on the beach.
"We should not go to Ba Sing Se," Circus Girl rasps.
"If we do, our future is uncertain. With a return to the Fire Nation, we could gain pardons and-" Mai continues, before my snort cuts her persuasions short.
"Do I look like I'd be happy to have been pardoned by the Fire Nation? More, do you think the princess will agree to it? I was the one to injure her, after all. She would want nothing more than to even the score," I mean, seriously. Did I not make abundantly clear that I will not sacrifice my freedom, much less to people who have committed genocide and teach their children lies?
It is very, very unlikely that I would even see more than the inside of a tin can once they found out who I was.
I decide to be a little cruel. They would need the extra push to agree to my most outrageous demand yet.
"If that's all you can think of, you might want to reflect on how desperately you want your princess back," I let it settle in for just long enough to properly turn around, "Is she someone you can depend on no matter what?"
Circus Girl looks ready to puff up indignantly, while Mai's eyes narrow.
"Because if there is doubt that she would not help you if you have made a mistake, or if she would condemn you for agreeing to something such as a hostage exchange for your own little brother, is she someone you really want to have around?"
And while they digest that, I throw the real gauntlet, "Would she, if she thought she needed to reassert her dominance over you, beat you into the ground? Would she stomp on your self-esteem? Would she close off all other support systems but herself in order to make you dependent on her?"
"No! No, of course she wouldn't!" Circus Girl protests loudly in her croaky voice.
"Really? Hasn't she done all those things already? Why do you want her back so desperately, if she hasn't made herself so very important to your very sense of self? I happen to like her much better this far away."
She flinches back.
"When someone else's desires constitute your own happiness it's either called love," and I raise my brows at that sceptically, "Or tyranny."
Circus Girl's mouth becomes a thin line. Wordlessly, she turns and leaves.
Mai, somehow more exhausted than when this began, as though I had tired them out once more, as though I had revealed new information, follows her friend without another word.
"Trouble in paradise?"
I turn to look at Buniq instead of Mai's retreating back in the glimmer of the firelight. "We're not together."
She looks confused, but it is only for appearance's sake. "But the child…"
"The brat's her brother. But he seems to like me well enough," I shrug. Mai is going to drive me mad. I just know it.
...
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...
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