Chapter 6: The Weight of Their Judgement
Katsumi sat at his desk like a ghost no one wanted to see.
The scratches on the table blurred in front of his eyes, and he could feel his own arms wrapped tightly around his body—as if hugging himself could hold him together.
He didn't eat.
He didn't move.
His mind circled the same question again and again:
What did Utsuro do?
He hadn't spoken a word about the breakup.
He didn't scream. He didn't curse. He just wanted to be safe.
Was that… really such a bad thing?
---
Then came lunchtime.
And the volume in the classroom grew.
Whispers. Then murmurs. Then pointed comments.
"Figures a guy like him would do something like that…"
"He probably cheated on her."
"No way she was the problem."
"He's just trash."
Katsumi gripped his elbows tighter. His head stayed low, his bangs covering his eyes.
Until—
"I-it's my fault… really…"
A quiet voice broke through the crowd.
His breath hitched.
He knew that voice.
Slowly, Katsumi raised his head.
Utsuro was standing near the front of the classroom.
Looking small.
Looking fragile.
She held her lunch tray with both hands and trembled—just enough for everyone to notice.
"I… I just wasn't good enough, that's all…"
The room went silent for a second.
"…I wasn't pretty enough. Not like his type…"
Her voice cracked, eyes shimmering with fake tears.
"…My chest isn't big like the other girls he likes… Maybe if I was more like them, he wouldn't have gotten tired of me…"
Katsumi's heart dropped.
His mouth opened—but nothing came out.
Because in that moment, he understood.
She wasn't talking to him.
She was talking at him.
For everyone else to hear.
She was performing.
And it worked.
"Dude… are you serious right now?" one guy muttered, standing up from the back row.
"I didn't know you were that kind of guy," another followed.
Katsumi started to stand. "W-wait, I—"
But it was too late.
The first punch slammed into his jaw, knocking him sideways into the desk.
The class exploded into chaos.
More boys rushed in.
Fists.
Kicks.
Desks scraped across the floor.
He tried to cover his head, tried to curl up, but it didn't stop the impact. Every blow felt like thunder. His ribs screamed. His back throbbed. His vision blurred.
Somewhere in the noise, he could still hear her voice.
Softly.
Innocently.
"I guess I just wasn't enough for him…"
Tears streamed down her cheeks.
The class looked at her like a victim.
And at him like a monster.
All the while, Katsumi's thoughts spun in circles between each punch.
What did I do wrong?
I didn't scream at her.
I didn't hit her.
I just said I was scared…
I just said I wanted out…
Isn't breaking up normal?
Isn't it… allowed?
His mouth filled with the taste of iron.
Darkness crept in at the edges of his vision.
And still, he wondered:
Do I really deserve this?