After two weeks of recovery, I went back to the office. It was great to work with Yoshino, to feel useful again, to talk to acquaintances inquiring about my health… I liked my job!
It was going to be the death of me.
"Are you dead yet?"
I let out a groan, not unlike the dying call of a goat (very alluring, indeed). Kakashi patted the top of my head without looking away from the book he was reading. We were resting on the couch. He was sandwiched between the armrest and my dead weight but made it look like he was lounging comfortably for the cover of a magazine. My boyfriend was so out of my league that it wasn't funny.
I contemplated the effort it would require for me to go to bed. I was exhausted. My body didn't hurt, not anymore, but I had used every last drop of energy I had, and I just… couldn't move. Coming back home had been a trial as it was, a trial which I had failed: Genma had to carry me for the stairs.
"I'm home!"
Talking about Genma…
"I got soba!"
I perked up at the mention of food. "Bless you!"
He stepped into the living room, take-out bag in hand, and smiled at me knowingly. "Do you think you can sit up to eat?"
Before I could reply, Kakashi had put down his book, grabbed me by the waist, and rearranged our positions so I could lean back against his chest comfortably. "Here."
Genma handed over a bowl and chopsticks.
"Best boyfriends ever." I cradled the bowl against my collarbone to make sure I wouldn't spill broth everywhere.
"Maa, such a low-maintenance girlfriend," Kakashi replied, amused, as he accepted his own bowl.
"You weren't the one carrying her."
"What's that s'posed to mean?" I mumbled around my noodles. "Are you calling me fat?"
"Of course not, darling. If you ever were fat, I'm pretty sure weeks in a hospital bed fixed that for you," he replied while sitting down on the low table to face us.
"I was a chubby kid," I mentioned distractedly in between some slurping.
"Were you?"
"Uhuh. I didn't want to play ninja with others, run around and all that… You know, I was too old in my head for that."
"You must have been the favorite of your class," Genma said sarcastically.
"Yep. I'm pretty sure you were the favorite, am I right?"
He shrugged. "Only with the ladies."
I snorted and chewed on my mouthful before glancing over my shoulder. Kakashi was foregoing his mask and hitai-ate around the house now, which made my heart do somersaults when I realized it would become a habit. I couldn't yet stifle the urge to make sure he wasn't bored while I talked with Genma, but he never seemed to be. I would get over it soon, hopefully, but I didn't want anyone to feel excluded in our relationship. That was my biggest fear.
"Don't ask about Kakashi. He was a mess," Genma joked.
"Past tense. While you still are," Kakashi replied, deadpan.
I snorted, nearly spitting out broth and choking.
"Nice," Genma approved good-naturedly. He liked witty comebacks even to his expense, which was a good thing considering that their relationship was 20% of those. It was not boring.
I patted my chest to clear my airways and nodded.
When I finished my bowl, I put it down next to Genma. The dishes would wait until tomorrow, I couldn't care less about them. "I'm going to bed. Thanks for the meal."
"You're welcome. Want company?"
"Nuh-uh. I'm going to crash. You two go ahead and enjoy yourself," I mumbled while leaning on the wall to go to the bathroom.
"Don't mind if we do!" Genma shouted at my back.
I smiled, knowing that Kakashi wouldn't give him the time of day as long as his book wasn't finished. He knew it too, I bet, because the TV was turned on right after.
Several hours later, I woke up from a light doze as they came into the bedroom.
My bed had disappeared one day to be replaced by three futons pushed together and covered with sheets.
I was gently pushed away from the left side (closest to the door) I was hogging. I swapped the pillows and grumbled: "Why am I always in the middle?"
"Because curves mean you're an excellent pillow and teddy bear, sweetheart."
I huffed, although I didn't try to remove the warm hand caressing my hip and pulling my nightdress higher. "Just say you're paranoid bastards who can't feel restrained."
"We're paranoid bastards who can't feel restrained," Kakashi dutifully repeated.
While Genma liked to be the bigger spoon and hug me loosely as we went to sleep, Kakashi wasn't comfortable with more than a few touches. I was fine with both, especially since Kakashi humored my need for cuddles the rest of the time.
"Good night."
I closed my eyes and listened to their quiet breaths. I wasn't used to it yet. We had talked about it, and they had mentioned it reminded them of sleeping with their teams during missions. In Genma's absence, Kakashi had also admitted that he had fewer nightmares when he didn't sleep alone. It wasn't something I had experienced: I hadn't gone on missions with a team often enough to get used to it. As such, I was often the last one to fall asleep, but it was comforting to know they were so close.
In the morning, I woke up to an empty bed, although I could hear them in the kitchen. I took a few minutes before going to the bathroom. When I came out, Genma was waiting, leaning against the wall, only wearing pajama bottoms.
He straightened and kissed my cheek. "Good morning sweetheart. Breakfast is ready."
"Thanks." I kissed him back before he went into the bathroom.
I stumbled into the kitchen to find Kakashi doing one-handed push-ups while he read his book. He was only wearing pants as well.
"Morning," he said distractedly, turning the page with his free hand.
I needed a moment to check I wasn't dreaming (this looked like the start of a steamy fantasy). After a second, I shrugged and went to sit in front of the bowl of rice porridge waiting for me. "Morning. That book looks really captivating. Your nose has been stuck in it since yesterday."
"Mh? Yeah, it's good."
"Can I borrow it once you're done? I went through everything I had to read these last weeks."
"Sure."
I let the silence settle, transfixed by his muscles undulating under his skin. Before I realized it, my bowl was empty. I cleared my throat and went to wash it, trying to get my mind back on track. I didn't have time for lustful daydreaming. The Hokage had a meeting at ten o'clock I had to prepare for. As yummy as my boyfriends were in the morning, I had my own routine to follow.
As an administrative agent, I didn't need to be as ripped as they were, but every active ninja had to be in fighting shape to a level corresponding to their rank. Every four months, we were evaluated to make sure of it. If we failed those examinations, the consequences ranged from salary deduction and remediation to demotion if it was a repeated offense. Every ninja was responsible for their training regimen, and none could afford to neglect it.
After the coma I went through, it would be difficult to pass the incoming examination. Although I should receive a simple warning due to extenuating circumstances, I always managed to pass inspections, and it would be a blow to my pride if I couldn't. If I neglected my daily training routine, it would be worse.
With the hours I pulled at the tower, I rarely had time to train outside like most combatants. I did warm-ups and exercises in a corner of the living room free from any furniture.
I was in the middle of a split when Genma came out of the bathroom, fully dressed.
"When is the start of your shift?" I asked, leaning forward on my elbows.
"Ten minutes. Are we still okay for the movie tonight or do you think you'll be too tired again?"
I winced. "Can we postpone? Just a few days."
"Sure thing. I'll have the evening free in four days. Kakashi?"
"Should be free for the next week" was the reply coming from the kitchen.
"Still training the newbie are you?"
A groan was his only answer.
Genma chuckled and went to put on his shoes. "Four days it is. I'm looking forward to that movie. Action and humor in one package are my favorites."
"The female character better be good like you promised!"
"You won't be disappointed. Trust me, I'm the movie specialist," he replied with a hand to his chest. "See you later!"
When Kakashi went into the bathroom, I was doing crunches while planning my to-do list for the day. When he came out, I was finishing squats and cursing the day I decided to become a kunoichi. Getting back to shape after an injury was always the worst.
"Cramp again?" he asked as he dried his gravity-defying hair with a towel.
I rubbed my ankle one last time. "No, just some strain. When is your meeting?"
"Ten. I might spar with Gai beforehand. It's been a while. Letting out some steam might keep me from strangling my team."
"It can't be that bad." I went into the bathroom but kept the door open so we could speak.
"The newbie's slow on the uptake and the team's short on patience. I already used all my usual punishments."
"Positive reinforcement is more effective, you know."
"What?"
"Using the carrot rather than the stick," I joked, stepping into the shower. "In my previous world, there were psychological studies done to prove that people learned better when they were rewarded for good behavior rather than punished for something they shouldn't do. When they are punished, they just don't do it when and where you can see it, which can be useful in certain cases I guess but not for bad habits you want them to lose. I learned that to become a teacher."
"Are you telling me I should give them cakes when they're doing something right?"
I chuckled and craned my neck to be heard despite the water's noise. "No, but you're getting the idea."
"I have a reputation, Maiko," he sighed. His voice had changed a little as if he had put on his mask.
"Oh, do you? And what does it say?"
"That I shouldn't be crossed."
"Uhuh. Isn't that a little boring though? Aren't you looking forward to surprising them a little bit?"
He was much closer when he said: "I am listening."
I smiled in victory and discussed with him how he could modify his training process.
oOo
As agreed with Yoshino, her shift started an hour after mine to give her time to deal with her family's needs. Yesterday, she had left Shikamaru with a babysitter to focus on getting me up to date. Today she brought him to the office. Unlike his father, Yoshino didn't carry him around, so I was greeted by a tired Shikamaru dragging his feet. He collapsed on the pillow and blanket his mother had laid down between some bookcases behind her desk. I watched him wrap himself like a maki and smiled in shared amusement with Yoshino. At least the morning would be quiet on that front.
Excitement came in the afternoon and took the shape of a rebellious teenager.
"What can I do for you Mitarashi-san?" I asked while I finished the letter I was writing as per the Hokage's instructions.
"Ibiki said you wanted to see me," Anko replied, cleaning her teeth out with a dango stick.
"Ah, yes." Thank you so much for that, Ibiki. That was totally not what I wanted when I talked to him and he knew it, the asshole. I pretended to tidy my desk to buy a few seconds to decide how to deal with this. In the end, I didn't have the time or patience for games, and honesty might be more efficient. "I received a transfer request in your name around… mh, when was it?" Being in a coma for weeks messed with your sense of time.
I checked the calendar. "Wow, that was already three months ago. I wonder, Mitarashi-san, why you didn't come sooner to inquire about its state. Might it be because you didn't follow the proper protocol?"
Anko straightened and sent the stick into the nearest trashcan. "Alright. I get it. I didn't follow your paper pushers' rules, so you held it back, didn't you? Abuse of power is the only way you guys can feel good about your little lives, ain't it? Does that turn you on?" she asked with a dirty smirk while leaning forward suggestively.
I tilted my head to the side as I considered my next move. I could empathize with Anko: she had suffered under Orochimaru's care, and she still did because of the distrust everyone had for the former pupil of a traitor. She wanted to prove her worth, but she had to deal with more crap than most. She probably got used to people making her life difficult on purpose and learned to deal with it with bravado to hide her feelings and a lot of manipulation to get her way. With teenagehood and Ibiki as a role model, that made an explosive cocktail. So, I got it, the posturing and everything. It didn't mean that I approved. We shared a common hatred for Orochimaru, but our similarities stopped there.
Yoshino stood up and gestured for her son to follow. Shikamaru sighed but dropped his book when his father was mentioned. He left but threw a glance over his shoulder in Anko's direction, aware of why he had to leave.
"Where should I start?" I murmured. "First of all, thank you for your interest in my sexual life, but it's currently perfectly satisfying and doesn't require extra stimulation." I heard Genma snort. "In the same manner, my self-esteem is doing great. My little life could be improved with fewer snakes, but it's overall quite fulfilling. So no, Mitarashi-san, I didn't hold back your papers just for my pleasure and to piss you off. I held those papers back because protocol, as annoying as it can be, is there for a reason . A confounding concept, I know. Shall I explain?" I raised a hand at her attempt to interrupt. "Don't answer that. I'm on a roll, it's too late for you. Protocol demands that all papers needing review must be delivered in person. Why? Because impersonating someone is the oldest trick in the book for infiltrators and spies. Protocol states that animals summons are only used for emergency deliveries. Why? Because summoning is a—"
"I know this!" Anko shouted.
"Then why are you breaking protocols and giving me attitude?! I don't care about your personal troubles, Mitarashi-san. I'm holding you to the same standards as everyone else, no more and no less. You're not above the rules. Is that clear?"
She didn't reply and looked ready to say something stupid again.
"Is that clear?" I repeated slowly, punctuating my words with a warning glare.
She had to bite her lip, but she hissed a "Yes."
I took her transfer request out of a drawer and held it out to her. "The Hokage will see you now."
She took it brusquely and went to the door, only stopping a step before to calm herself down. She was impulsive, not stupid. Even if the Yondaime was indulgent, he commanded respect by his presence alone. Too bad that rarely rubbed off on his assistants. That would be damn useful.
I wasn't surprised when Ibiki appeared as soon as the door was closed behind his subordinate. He had probably been listening from the start. I glared at him, unimpressed by his scheming. "Was that a test of her pride?"
Pride was the downfall of many shinobi. You had to be able to contain it for the betterment of a mission or a simple goal like a transfer request. I had no doubt this was an ongoing struggle for Anko.
He smirked. "Yes. You did brilliantly, Kamizuki-san."
I groaned in disgust. " Butchers . Give me a break, will you?" I could only imagine my reputation in the Torture and Interrogation Force, but the dislike was mutual.
"Where would be the fun in that?" he asked before leaving with a nod in Genma and Raidou's direction.
I immediately turned toward Genma and pointed a pen at him. "Not a word!"
Stopping with his mouth open, he raised his hands questioningly.
"I know you were going to make an inappropriate joke. Don't. Keep it professional, Genma, professional ."
"I'm professional," he protested with a smirk. "But alright, just for you, darling. I'll keep it in store for tonight. Your satisfaction is my priority." He ducked the pen thrown at him and Raidou's punch, but it didn't stop him from laughing at his own joke.
I had to endure a lot of dirty jokes in the evening. Kakashi wasn't any help: he found the recollection of my speech delightful and asked for an immediate opportunity to ensure my 'satisfaction'.
My boyfriends were trolls.
oOo
The next day, I was pointedly not looking in Genma's direction, to avoid any inappropriate blushing from me and any lewd wink or smirk from him.
"Maiko, a minute of your time?" Minato called as he stepped into his office.
"Of course, Hokage-sama."
I stood up and locked up any sensitive documents in drawers before I left my desk. I stepped over Shikamaru, who was lying between his mother's desk and mine with a book in hand. I went around the space where Iruka was working on the latest fuuinjutsu exercise Minato gave him. I passed by the guards, slapping away Genma's wandering hand without a glance, and closed the office's door behind me.
"What can I do for you, Hokage-sama?"
"There is something we should discuss. I was waiting for you to feel better," he explained, gesturing toward a chair. To my surprise, he activated a privacy seal, which he only used for confidential meetings since the room was already sound-proofed.
I moved the chair in front of his desk and sat down. "Alright. What is it?"
"I don't know how much you remember from your time with Orochimaru and your return to the world of... living corporeal beings, but you need to know that there is a seal on you."
I had tensed when Orochimaru was mentioned. I was not looking forward to reviving this event. While I had mostly made my peace with what I went through, thanks to weeks of recovery and despite bouts of nightmares, the last thing I wanted to do was to talk about it. When I woke up at night, I only wanted Genma or Kakashi's embrace to remind me that I was safe, nothing more.
I didn't remember anything about a seal.
"On me? You mean… Orochimaru put something on me? Why?"
"No, not Orochimaru. Your grandfather did. It has always been there. I found a draft of it in the research your mother gave me. It was put on you before your birth, transmitted through your mother's blood to your own, I'd say, which is highly advanced, dangerous, and unstable work. Orochimaru only managed to reach for it so he could study it. He also tried to modify it, which… led to the situation you were in when we found you. I had to cancel the alteration so you could… get back to normal." Minato was getting increasingly uncomfortable. He was rubbing his brow and wasn't looking at me.
"What's wrong? You canceled the modification, so I'm back to normal… right?"
"Yes, you are… as normal as you were."
"What's that supposed to mean?"
"You can't die," he blurted out, staring at me.
"What?"
"I studied the seal for days, and… the modification done by Orochimaru didn't lead to your state of dissociation. It led to your death. The change in the seal was lethal," he explained, leaning forward with his elbows on his desk, his hands moving to emphasize his explanation.
"But I didn't die," I pointed out, baffled. For a genius, Minato wasn't making much sense right now.
"You did. I mean, your body died and then was most probably resuscitated by Orochimaru, but too late. Your soul should have left your body and moved on to the Pure Land, but it didn't. It was stuck because the seal anchors your soul to your body. One of the side-effects from Orochimaru's modification was the interruption of the natural connection which allowed your soul to find its way back… in."
"Summarize," I asked, raising a hand to my head. My heart was beating too fast, and I felt clammy. He couldn't say what I was thinking he was saying, right? That was impossible.
"The seal prevents your soul from leaving. As long as there is a body, you won't die. You can stop breathing, or your heart can stop for hours, but if it starts beating again, you'll come back to your body. You'll resuscitate, or you'll be stuck in limbo like you were when in a coma."
"That's not physically possible! The brain deteriorates if it's not irrigated by blood so how even—"
"I didn't say there wouldn't be consequences," Minato announced solemnly. "Your soul can't leave until your body is entirely destroyed. If your body is impaired… then you'll be stuck in a shell of yourself."
"But that would mean… for eternity, I would be…" I felt dizzy as I imagined all the ways this could go wrong. This could lead me to an eternity of torment! "Remove it," I breathed.
"Maiko—"
"Remove it!" I repeated frantically. Tears filled my eyes and clouded my sight. "You can do it, right?! You're the best fuuinjutsu master! Just remove it! I don't want this! I don't want it! I didn't ask for this! I DIDN'T!" I burst into tears, sobbing like I hadn't in years. My shoulders were shaking. "Just remove it, please ."
He moved around his desk and came to hold me. Crouching in front of me, he pulled me into his embrace. I clung to his vest.
"Please," I begged.
Minato pet my hair, shushing me gently until I had calmed down a little. "Maiko, listen to me." He cupped my face between his hands and looked me in the eye.
He was a little blurry, but I listened nonetheless, sniffling softly.
"Do you trust me?"
"Yes."
"This seal is extremely complex and one small mistake can have devastating consequences for you. Orochimaru proved it, and I had difficulties as well when I tried to help you the first time. I promise to help you, but this will take time. Do you understand?"
"How much time?"
"Months, maybe years. I want Jiraiya-sensei's opinion before I try anything."
I sniffled some more and brushed tears and snot away with my sleeve. "You're not allowed to die before you removed this seal from me, Hokage-sama, understood?"
Minato smiled. "Understood."
"And if I die before it happens and my body's too badly damaged, you have to swear you'll burn this damn body until there is nothing left."
"Alright."
"Swear it to me," I asked, tugging on his vest.
"I swear it, Maiko. You have my word," he said softly, squeezing my wrists briefly and conveying all his feelings in a look.
I drew courage and reassurance from him, putting my faith in his capacities and reliability. I could trust him, he would help. I wasn't alone in this mess and that certainty drew me away from panic.
oOo
I dried my tears, patted my cheeks, and cleared my expression before getting out of the Hokage's office, but Genma followed me when I went to the bathroom.
"What's wrong?" he asked while I washed my hands.
"Nothing."
"Maiko, you're refusing to meet my eyes. You're hiding something from me."
Damn it. If I looked at him, he'd know. If I didn't look at him, he'd suspect anyway. I couldn't win.
I sighed and bent down to wash my face. It was a telltale sign but screw it.
He was behind me when I looked up. Our eyes met in the mirror.
"You cried," he realized. "Why?"
"I don't want to talk about it."
"Mai-chan—"
"Genma," I interrupted him, staring at him through the mirror. "I don't want to talk about it. Not now. Just… I can't, alright?" My voice quavered. If I was given the occasion, I would crumble into tears again. This was the last thing I needed at work. "I'll tell you. Just, please... wait."
He hesitated but caved. "Alright, but this isn't over."
I kissed the corner of his lips. "Thank you. I love you."
He relaxed but didn't smile, his brown eyes analyzing me from head to toe for an answer to his questions. "I love you too, darling, but you'll give me grey hair before I'm thirty and that's not acceptable. I like my hair."
I couldn't repress a smile. "I like it too," I admitted, tugging on a strand of long hair. Not every man could pull off his haircut, but it fit him.
"So be kinder to me." He threw an arm around my shoulders and pressed me against his side. "Come on, let's go."
We went back to work.
I might have made a few more mistakes than usual, and I might have been a little more gloomy than most days, but it was nothing to worry about.
The Boyfriends disagreed.
I was assaulted by a blond storm who made himself at home on my lap and enthusiastically tapped the desk with his tiny hands. "Can I help you, Maiko-san?"
"Of course, Naruto-kun," I agreed, gathering papers, red ink, and a stamp, which I put in front of him.
I eyed Kakashi-the-lousy-babysitter and Genma-the-distracted-guard as they talked together in low voices. Although they weren't looking at me, I knew exactly what (or rather 'who') they were talking about. They didn't even try to be discrete.
That's the problem with a triad relationship: two members could ally against the third so easily! ... Why was I treating this like a fight, now? I needed to calm down.
"Are you alright, Maiko-san?"
I blinked and looked down. Naruto had finished and was looking up at me with big blue eyes filled with curiosity.
"Of course. Why?"
"Kakashi-nii-san said I had to di-ditra—"
"Distract?"
"Yes, that. Distract you."
"Oh, did he now?" I murmured. Using kids against me was just unfair! Aaand, I needed to calm down again. I breathed in deeply. "Well, it's a bad day, but nothing to worry about."
"Eat ramen!"
"What?"
"When daddy or I have a bad day, we eat ramen," he explained seriously as if it was the recipe to heal all wrongs.
"That's because it's your favorite food."
"Yeah! It's the best! What's yours?"
"My favorite food? Maki. I really like maki."
"Maki is fine, but ramen is better."
"Well, I beg your pardon; waffles are even better!"
Naruto froze in the middle of the "No, ramen!" he had prepared, stumped by the apparition of his favorite dessert in the equation. His nose scrunched quite cutely as he thought it through. "No, ramen," he decided after a long minute of reflection with his arms crossed and his head tilted.
I chuckled and ruffled his hair. "If you say so."
Iruka came back from the library, where he had taken Shikamaru for a stroll while getting material for his fuuinjutsu. Naruto was immediately out of my lap. He jumped into Iruka's arms, even if it forced the teenager to drop the scrolls he was carrying. Shikamaru let out a muttered "troublesome".
I suppressed a laugh behind a fist and met Yoshino's amused eyes. Naruto and Shikamaru were polar opposites, but they were bound to meet each other more often around here.
"Maa, such a distracted soldier," Kakashi murmured next to me. He had appeared by my side unnoticed, again . I sent him the usual glare as I repressed a start.
"That tends to happen with three-year-olds," I pointed out with sarcasm.
"Is that so? Such a shame." His eye crinkled as he sat on the edge of the desk. "Now, did I tell you about training yesterday?"
"No."
"Yes, we were a little busy," he said with an innocent tilt of his head. "Well, I admit your plan to drive my little underlings nuts is a great success."
"Wha—" I squinted at him. "You're having me on, that wasn't the plan."
"Wasn't it?"
"Are you trying to piss me off or something?"
"Maybe."
"Oh for—" I stopped myself from swearing as young voices reminded me of the impressionable kids nearby. I settled for pushing him away. "Shoo! I have some work to do."
Fortunately, he complied readily and went back to scheming with Genma. I thought I heard a "you were right" but nothing more. Whatever. I had better things to do than focusing on them. It included not focusing on my immortal state.
oOo
I came back home alone. Genma's shift ended later than mine today, and Kakashi had to bring Naruto to the Uchiha for dinner.
Satisfied that I had some time for myself to brood over the seal revelation, I removed my sandals in the genkan, muttering: "Stupid grandfather. If he ended up in the Pure World, I hope grandma put him through the wringer."
I had made peace with that part of the family's history, but that was before knowing the consequences for me in the long term. I already had a chance at a second life (and it wasn't all sunshine and rose petals), I didn't want anything to do with any kind of immortality. I was no Hidan or Orochimaru. The concept alone was repugnant to me. All the ways this could go wrong scared me more than anything else ever did, even more than the torture and experimentations I had feared previously and lived through. I just… There were so many scenarios I could imagine on how this could end terribly!
I had already lost everything I knew and cared for once. To go through that again terrified me. Adding to that the possibility of being chained to a worthless corpse? I couldn't. It made me extremely anxious. I felt the panic rise as I removed my shoes and noticed the silence.
Being alone wasn't such a good idea after all.
"Yo."
I squealed in fright and jumped back, a war fan in each hand, ready to slice in pieces the intruder I hadn't noticed…
Oh.
I crouched down, glaring at the small pug who had raised a paw in greeting. " You are just as bad as your master. Don't scare the shit out of me! "
"Sorry about that," Pakkun said nonchalantly.
"You even have his blasé attitude!"
"Yeah, well, he likes to mimic me. It tends to happen with kids, you know."
I tilted my head and contemplated this answer for a second. "How old are you?! No, wait, don't answer that, I'm not sure I want to know." I offered my hand. "I'm Kamizuki Maiko. Nice to meet you. I heard a lot about you."
"Same," he replied, tapping my palm with his paw.
"Why are you here?" I asked as I stood up and walked into the living room.
Pakkun followed. "Just looking around Kakashi's new home."
"He hasn't moved in yet." And he probably wouldn't. If we really wanted to live together in the long term, we would need a bigger apartment than mine. For three people used to living alone (although Genma was currently sharing with Raidou), it was too small.
"Didn't he? I can smell him everywhere," Pakkun replied, jumping on the couch and making himself comfortable.
Well, we were in a kind of honeymoon phase and lived in each other's pockets. After getting our bearings, there had been a lot of… honeymoon things.
I squinted at him. "That's not why you're here… Kakashi asked you to keep me company, didn't he?"
"Yep."
I huffed, but a smile crept up and took control of my lips. It was nice of him, I couldn't deny that. My panic attack had ebbed away.
"D'you want to watch TV and eat snacks with me?"
Pakkun perked up. "What kind of snacks are we talking about?"
"What kind do you want? I'm so tired nowadays that I don't have the energy to cook. The fridge is full of snacks."
"Kakashi wouldn't approve."
I grunted and opened the fridge. "Oh… That must be why he made onigiri." I removed the container marked with a 'for Maiko' post-it. "That's nice…"
"No snacks for me?"
I grabbed the box marked 'for Pakkun' and showed it to him. His tail wagged happily.
Kakashi was spoiling us. I didn't think that was his style, but now that I thought about it, he was quite strict on his diet. I never had seen him eat junk food and rarely any sweets or fried food. I had guessed he was able to cook for himself, contrary to Genma, who was a real mess in the kitchen: when he tried to help me, I had to keep a careful eye on him or his 'creative inspiration' would ruin perfectly good ingredients.
When Kakashi came home, I was munching on my second onigiri, draped in a blanket on the couch, Pakkun nestled on my chest. Two heads turned lazily in his direction, and Kakashi's eye crinkled in amusement.
"Are we comfortable?" he asked.
"Quite," I replied.
"I like your girl, Kakashi. She has good tastes."
Kakashi glanced at the TV and snorted when he noticed we were watching a cartoon about dogs.
"Come and join us," I offered. "I'll share my onigiri with you… which is a tremendous effort, because they're really good."
He sat down beside me and helped himself.
Once I had finished my own dumpling, I craned my neck to kiss his masked cheek. "Thanks. For the food and the dog."
"You're welcome," Pakkun replied in his master's stead. Kakashi's only answer was an eye-smile.
An hour later, Genma showed up, took a look at us, and sent a thumbs-up to Kakashi. I pretended I didn't see it. It wasn't so bad when my boyfriends colluded together after all.
oOo
"So? How did you like it?"
I yawned behind my arm but raised a thumb in answer to Genma's excited question.
We were leaving the cinema after watching the movie he had been so eager to see. The fact that it was actually good (and loud) was the only thing keeping me from falling asleep. I had slept terribly the previous night. Since I knew about my so-called immortality, the nightmares had worsened.
"Not bad. The book was better though," Kakashi replied.
Genma's eyebrows went up. "There is a book?" He wasn't a big reader unless it was a travel magazine, and then there were more pictures than words, although to be fair he actually read the articles and was very knowledgable about the different cultures and regions of the world. Considering I hadn't traveled outside of Fire Country, he regularly taught me details about his own travels, in particular when he was bored and I had letters to write to foreigners (his advice was quite insightful).
"Oh, do you have it?" I asked, leaning on the nearest available shoulder, Genma's. "I'd like to read it." Kakashi's tastes in literature overlapped with mine, just like Genma's movies preferences mostly matched mine.
"Yes. I'll bring it over."
"Thanks. Although I already have that last one you loaned me. I'm not sure when I'll find time to read them," I admitted in between some more yawning.
"Do you want me to read it to you as a bedtime story?" Genma teased. "You look ready to crash."
"I feel like it," I sighed.
"Here, come on." He crouched to offer me a piggyback ride.
I didn't have the energy to protest. "We shouldn't make this a habit." Although it was fun. The advantage of a shinobi carrying you was that they made it look so effortless that you felt featherweight. I swung my feet a little as we made our way home.
"Do you want to tell us why you have so many nightmares lately?" Kakashi asked. I had woken them up more than once, although it wasn't for lack of trying to be quiet. They were just too high-strung not to notice.
"Not yet. Soon." I needed to come to terms with it first. I had no idea how to breach the subject, how to explain, when I could barely bear the thought. To say it was to accept it. I wasn't ready yet. I needed to talk about it with my mother first and foremost. Her counsel and full understanding of the situation were dearly needed. Unfortunately, I hadn't found the time to go see her. I would try this weekend, on my day off.
"Well, we aren't going anywhere," Genma commented.
"Maa, I thought we were going home?"
Genma valiantly tried to kick our boyfriend despite my added weight. "Smartass."
I chuckled at their antics and rubbed my face against Genma's neck. "Thank you for understanding."
oOo Bonus - Kakashi and the ANBU's training oOo
"Something changed with taichou," Tenzou whispered.
"I know right? He hasn't given us chores even once in two days, and he's being all… nice with the rookie," Tora agreed.
"Taichou can be nice," Tenzou protested.
"Sure. It's taichou-nice, like tough love, not… whatever that is," she muttered, gesturing in the direction where Kakashi was patting the newbie's back after the success of the last exercise.
"Well, it's working, isn't it? Kou didn't graze us even once."
"Right… but what happened? Is it a genjutsu do you think?"
Another of their teammates joined the conversation, hanging upside down from the branch above them. "He's going soft. I bet that's his new girlfriend's doing."
"The Yondaime's assistant? Dude, where did you get the idea she's soft? I saw her dress Danzou down," Tora replied.
"She's a no-kill, always going around with kids."
"So?" Tenzou replied disapprovingly. "You shouldn't judge a comrade on the number of their kills."
"Yeah, and what do you have against kids?" Tora added, miffed. She liked kids too: her little brothers and sisters were important to her.
"Don't you see? She's manipulat—"
They jolted as they were hit by a weak lightning jutsu, paralyzing them for a few seconds and causing them to fall to the ground. They scrambled up and kneeled at their leader's feet. Kakashi was looking down at them with his arms crossed, unimpressed, while their teammates watched in the background.
"Do you want to share with the rest of the team what has got you so distracted?" Kakashi drawled, his visible eye half-closed.
"No, taichou! Sorry, taichou!" they shouted in unison.
"I see," Kakashi said, letting the silence settle for a few seconds, during which everyone wondered if his recent kindness would continue… "Two hundred push-ups, crunches, and squats each. Then go inform the ANBU commander you volunteer for night watch duty for a week."
"Yes, taichou!" The three offenders shouted, immediately getting in position for their exercises.
"Going soft?" Tora hissed to her teammate. "Bite your fucking tongue!"