"Mother… You don't have to do this…"
She ignored my pleas anyways, her arms reaching out to grab onto my shoulders, the touch of her fingertips cold yet gentle with a hint of warmth.
"Hush my child… This will be a transformative experience for you." My mother muttered under her cherry blossom lips, pulling me into a relaxed yet possessive embrace. "There are no winners in war."
I gently push myself away from her, finally looking into her eyes. Her soft, warm, crystal blue eyes that speak differently from her demeanor. "I understand that mother, but I wish to test my martial prowess."
Upon hearing my words, my mother sighed, gently patting my shoulder as she did so.
"Gu Xing, in war you will have to kill people. People, Gu Xing. Not emotionless objects, not prisoners without a family."
I simply nod, having already heard this talk a million times as I had packed to leave. "I know mother, but remember, you're the one that raised me, the Ice Witch of the Demonic Cult."
She nodded, finally accepting that nothing will change my mind. "Then go on, go and show the murim world who taught you."
"Of course mother. I promise to return."
Picking up my bags, I leave our humble abode, stepping foot into the carriage and sitting down as the servants take my bags from me.
I rest my head against the walls of the carriage, closing my eyes and drifting off to sleep as the carriage starts its way to the demonic faction.
–One week later– {Perspective Change}
Lai Yingjie–
I look down at the uniform laid on the small cramped bed for me. This was the first time I had ever seen my name on a tag meant to identify my corpse rather than to get to know me.
Lai Yingjie, 42 male, a member of the Demonic Cult, learning the demonic arts, following no one other than Cheon ma. That is how a majority of the people in this crowded bunk room ended up here.
Digits within the war that was soon to start.
"Lai Yingjie… So that's your name."
Hearing my name, I raised my head reflectively, staring up at the other soldier before me.
–Wait..? Soldier? What is a child doing here?
"Nice to meet you, I'm Gu Xing, I'll be your commander."
Gu Xing reached out his hand, his rough, seemingly battered and worn hands. He's no more than my own daughter, yet he's a commander of this war.
Letting out a wryly chuckle, I reach out my hand as well, grasping his smaller hand in a shake.
"What is a child like you doing here? You're probably no older than my daughter."
"Well, let's just say I've trained myself quite hard."
Trained..? That's what most people would say, but in reality they've probably just got connections that helped them reach where they are now, but for some reason, when I felt his hand, I couldn't help but believe him.
They were beyond just battered, they actively had open flesh wounds as if the flesh had simply fallen off, his fingers covered in thick skin and calluses as some of his nails were missing.
His facial features hid those things though. Soft, almost round like features that showed his young age, his slump shoulders and lean frame making him seem almost completely unfit to be a warrior, yet he still stood before me with a smile on his face.
"I'll be in your care, yeah, Commander Gu?"
"Of course you will. You are all people of the Demonic Cult, I will not let a single one of you die on my watch."
Letting go of his hand, he walked up to the front center of the room, tapping his foot to cause a frosty air that covered the entire room in an instant, gathering each and every one of our attentions.
"At ease men! I am Gu Xing, leader of the 4th division of the scouting squads." Gu Xing paused to take a deep breath, in, and then out. "I promise you that none of you will shed blood ever!"
Hearing him, we were doubtful. A child, even if a trained warrior could surely not protect us all, even with all the warnings of death, we still went with it anyways.
"Go on and introduce yourselves to one another."
A tall skinny man at the far left of the room started first, "I am Fan Zhu, 38. I have a wife and son at home, so I'll be in your care commander."
His choice of words struck us all. He wanted to be transparent, to be seen as a human rather than a walking corpse. Even if it meant using the commander's words against him.
"I am Lai Yingji, 42. I also have a family waiting for me at home, a wife and daughter. Please take care of us, commander."
"I'm Li Chen, 39. I may not have a child yet, but I do have a pregnant wife waiting for me to return."
One by one, all 14 members of the 4th division introduced themselves. Each one of us has something precious to lose. Our very lives.
Yet we marched into hell on our very own two feet.
—————
———
<
A loud beep played into my ears from a talisman provided by the mages from the Demonic Cult.
All 15 of us hid within the deep darkness of the thick forest. The ruffles of winds covering your whispers as we discuss our status.
–Gu Xing checking in. Is everyone ready?
–This is Hu Meng. Everyone's in position. We're ready to ambush them.
–40 seconds until enemy engagement. Keep your weapons sheathed as even a simple reflection of the light may expose our locations.
Hearing Gu Xing's voice was oddly calming. As if I were hearing my own child play pretend with me.
–Commence attack.
As soon as the first lantern entered the forest, we broke through and charged straight through.
One. Two. Three. Four. Five. Six–
How many were there?
Looking up from my blood stained blade, I found an entire army behind the corpses we had created. Something we hadn't expected.
–This is Li Chen! Fan Zhu has fallen!
– Xie Hu here! Me, Shao and Han are being overwhelmed!
–Hu Meng, enemy at your 6 o'clock! Avoid… Damn…
–Gu Xing! Please help-...
One by one, voices faded from our minds. Even as the cold surrounded me, I could not tell if it was from Commander Gu Xing or from the blood seeping through the gaping wound in my chest.
Everything hurts. My skin almost feels like it's on fire despite how my skin feels so cold. All I could do was look up into the starry night sky as I laid on top of the corpses of my fallen comrades.
–Commander Gu…
I barely managed to mutter through the blood clogging my parched throat. Tears tasted bitter, salty with a strong punch of iron.
I don't want to die right now. I have a family to return to. My daughter… My wife.
–I… Want to live…
–Don'[] wor[]y..! I'[]l ma[][] s[]re [][]u retu[][] al[]v[]!
What did Commander Gu Say? My eyes are heavy, weak, and clouded. But even so, I wanted to live.
The stars in the sky were now dyed red, their once pure white glow now a dirty crimson red, falling from the sky around me.
–Cold…
I see… That's why I'm so cold… I'm not dying… It's just Commander Gu's yin energy. What a shame that the blood has ruined the pure white colour of his ice…
To have such a beautiful colour against the night sky be ruined by blood is such a shame…
It's almost like he's mourning us already by offering us flowers at our death bed. How tragic it is to be surrounded by flowers of death.
–Such… Beautiful.. Lycorises…