As a new student in a new environment got me thinking if I could be able to make best of friends with the new course mates , we introduced our self's and we were all smiling and cheerful because it's our first day in school .
I made new friends and was able to communicate well and fine,I was staying off campus and I got a friend who happened to be my seat mate in class her name was laila bt I call her bee,to also stay off campus, we stayed in a compound with 32 rooms, but we stayed in different rooms.
been with her gave me lots of impact in life ,I learnt to do things my way, at my convenience time,we were both known in our compound, we go everywhere together and do things together, I would say meeting her has been a blessing to me, hmmmm as a young girl who has never dated a man before was also a new thing for me.
I gradually adapt to the environment and also make friends too, then in my circle of friends am the only one without a boyfriend, and I was ok with that until one faithful day , one of my friend whom I called mina has a frd who came to see her at my apartment, he was tall handsome with shiny beards and a glowing face which shines with radiant and bright smiles, when I saw him I never thought of me and him been together, but I think he fell first and decided to have a try with me I gave him my number, we started talking on calls ,chats ,and we came to a conclusion of been friends with benefits, with times I decided I can't be a friend with benefits with him and we made everything simple and started dating,
I would say been with him my the best thou , but something is wrong somewhere , he's controlling, a smokes and drink , I tried stopping him from that and he agreed to stop that and I was happy to know that, we were all known by all my course mates, my friends, my family members, everyone around me, I only dated him and nobody else, I never knew I was making the biggest mistake of my life by loving him more my selfs,
he disrespect me ,he tells me word's I never expected from him, I was so sad but I decided to stay and sees if he will change from been the worst to the best,
hmmmmm I should have listened to my friends and lil sister advice to let him go then before going deeper with him .
they was a day we were having an arguement and it resolve to him hitting me across the face ,I was devastated and pained, I never imagined he could result to that, I hid that from my friends and sister, never told anyone about that, I decided to end everything that day and asked for break up, he begged me and apologized saying he never intended to do so, I believed him and let everything go, so we started going with the relationship and we were happy about the changes, life goes on ,
until he started showing another red flag which I find not acceptable, I tried making him see reasons, and he assured me of changing,
we had fun, I do go to visit him, spend weekends, and we have lots of sex, hmmmm before I cut that out I need to say that he was the best when it comes to romance, he takes good care and was always careful with my body, I have never imagined another man handling me more that he did, he's a best kisser, he's licks my body as if it was a lollipop, he was my first he has the best way of making it up whenever we had an arguement, I was so happy I had a man so caring but what spoils the happiness was all his attitude and nonchalant self, which I find not pleasing,
having him was the best I would say, he's the best man for me, and I really want to make it official if i got the chance too !! I was so much in love that's I forgot to love my self more ,I should say I was also not perfect but when it comes to him I always want to try my best and be the perfect one for him,I want to see him happy and not sad
I never want to see his bad side or anger
am always the one to apologized over everything and everytime, I was so happy and excited that I forgot he might be cheating and has a mate he wants
his favorite or more the want he wants to keep forever and not me
I forgot to keep my self busy and building my career and self to avoid any disappointment in life ,
Nop I was so busy making him happy and forget my won needs,I tried to see that I love my self more but couldn't because his love was too strong on my heart that I can't bare to stay far away from him not for a day.
him apologising was for his selfish reasons and wants he never prioritized me not for once but I never complained
I stayed to make things work, but he doesn't care about that because he's the nonchalant self I tried to make him see reasons to stop hurting me and my feelings, he won't listen or head to my advice rather he will make it looks like he was the victim not me ,
I have al lb the reasons to let him go and focus on my self but I didn't iij was so much in love and won't heed or take the red flags hmmmmm
am speechless and don't have anything to say again ,
my love life was perfect from the start but now I can't say !!!!!