The forest loomed ahead, tall and rustling and suspiciously cheerful. Birds chirped. Leaves swayed. Sunlight filtered through the canopy in soft beams like a painting of serenity. Honestly, it was insulting. I was on a mission to murder a rabbit, and nature was acting like I was here for a scenic picnic.
I took a hesitant step past the village boundary. The moment my foot touched the mossy forest path, I half-expected a horde of monsters to leap out of the bushes screaming, "SURPRISE!"
They didn't.
"Okay…" I muttered, "so far, so not-dead."
[Relax, Host. This section of the forest is classified 'Beginner-Friendly'.]
"Meaning?"
[Meaning unless you punch a bear or insult a wolf's fashion sense, you'll be fine.]
I snorted. "Good. Because I'm not in the mood for surprise mauling today. Maybe next week."
[Noted.]
I continued down the trail, carefully stepping over roots and trying not to trip like a toddler discovering legs. Birds watched me from branches above, probably placing bets on how long I'd last.
After a few minutes, something occurred to me.
"Hey, System," I said, glancing around. "How the hell am I supposed to find one rabbit in a forest the size of my family's ego?"
[Such language. But lucky for you, I am feeling unusually generous today.]
There was a shimmer, and then a translucent map blinked to life in front of me.
It showed the entire forest—paths, clearings, streams. A few glowing red dots pulsed ominously on the western edge, labeled "Danger Zone: Monster Nests – Avoid Unless Suicidal."
Near the center, in a little green patch marked "Mosslight Meadow," a group of small orange dots hopped around.
[You are here.] A blue arrow pulsed near the southern edge.
[Target is here.] A rabbit icon blinked cheerfully on the map.
"There's a map. With icons. Of rabbits," I said flatly. "You're telling me you could do this all along?"
[Yes. But where's the character growth in that?]
"Unbelievable."
[You're welcome.]
Grumbling under my breath, I followed the path the map provided, winding through trees and across a shallow stream that soaked my socks and killed what little remained of my patience. Eventually, after ten more minutes of muttering and cursing pebbles that dared stub my toes, I arrived at the edge of Mosslight Meadow.
And froze.
"…Oh."
It wasn't one rabbit.
It was an army.
They bounced through the grass in gentle hops, their white and gray coats gleaming in the sun, their twitchy noses wiggling like they had no idea they were meant to be my enemies.
I counted at least twenty.
A cute, fluffy battalion of doom.
I crouched behind a bush and whispered, "So… I just have to kill one, right? Just one?"
[Correct. You are not required to commit bunny genocide. One fluffy casualty will suffice.]
"Great," I muttered. "Should be easy."
I held out my hand. The warmth of fire magic tingled in my fingertips. The first rabbit wandered a little closer.
I focused.
"Burn."
A small, sizzling fireball launched from my palm wobbling slightly like it had stage fright and flew straight at the rabbit.
Who immediately bolted left at a speed that would shame wind magic itself.
The fireball hit a log.
Foomp.
"Okay," I said slowly. "They're fast. Noted."
I tried again.
Fireball number two. Same result. A blur of fur. A flash of movement. A poor pinecone caught on fire.
Fireball three. Launched with desperation and rage. This time the rabbit didn't move. I held my breath.
It was a rock.
"WHY ARE YOU SHAPED LIKE A RABBIT?!" I screamed at the inanimate object.
[MP: 0 / 20]
"Oh no."
[You have exhausted your mana. Your soul is now tired, disappointed, and slightly embarrassed.]
I stared at my hand. "Wait… I used three fireballs. Each costs 6 MP. That's 18… I should still have 2 left."
[Indeed. You are now the proud owner of a whopping 2 MP. Which is enough to summon a flame slightly warmer than a candle stub. In 5 minutes, you'll regenerate 2 more. Woo.]
I face-planted into the grass.
"You didn't think to mention that before the third shot?"
[I believed in you.]
"You're a system. You don't believe in anything but data and suffering."
[Precisely.]
Lying in the grass, surrounded by smug rabbits and smoldering logs, I took stock of my options.
Option A: Try again in five minutes and hope the rabbits don't evolve wings.
Option B: Charge at one and hope it has a death wish.
Option C: Set a trap.
"I'm gonna die out here," I muttered, getting up and brushing grass off my backside. "Alright, trap it is. How hard can it be? It's just a rabbit. Not a battle-hardened war general."
Fifteen minutes later…
"I have made… a basket," I whispered, staring down at my contraption.
It wasn't a good basket. It was a vaguely circular mess of sticks, string, one sock (don't ask), and sheer desperation. It wasn't even the kind of trap that looked like it would work.
"Okay," I said, hiding in a nearby bush. "Now we wait."
A rabbit wandered by. Sniffed the air. Hopped closer.
I held my breath.
It paused.
Sniffed again.
Then turned around and peed on my trap.
"OH COME ON!"
[At least it noticed your craftsmanship. That's progress.]
"I hate everything."
[Use the time to reflect on your choices.]
"Oh I am, System. I'm reflecting so hard I might go into a coma."
Eventually, after multiple failed trap attempts (including one that accidentally tied my own ankle to a tree root), I sat down, sweaty, annoyed, and covered in leaf bits, when finally :
[MP: +2 regenerated.]
I grinned.
"Oh, it's on, you fluffy demon."
I stood, spotted a smaller rabbit grazing alone, raised my hand, and this time… waited. Focused. Let the fire swirl properly before casting.
"Burn."
The fireball shot forward clean, focused, angry. The rabbit saw it.
Too late.
POOF.
One fluffy corpse.
It flopped over with a dramatic little squeak and a puff of singed fur.
Silence.
Then a notification:
[Quest Complete!]+1 Strength awarded+5 EXPYou have unlocked: Rabbit Meat (Charred)
I stood there, wide-eyed.
"…I did it."
I raised both arms in the air.
"I KILLED A RABBIT!"
[Truly, today shall be remembered in the songs of heroes.]
I stared down at the rabbit. The other bunnies had all scattered like I'd declared war. Which, to be fair, I kind of had.
"…I feel amazing," I said.
[You now possess 4 Strength. Physically, you have reached the strength of a mildly athletic housecat. Congratulations.]
"I'll take it."
I picked up the rabbit meat and turned back toward the village, triumphant, sweaty, and possibly covered in rabbit hair.