Chapter 362: Darling?
"I surrender!"
Hearing the Bearded Sorcerer say this, I nearly stumbled and fell while running. Damn it! I was shocked, then roasted, then frozen by you, and now you just want to walk away after the fight?
Under the watchful eyes of thousands of adventurers, I reluctantly stopped, glanced at Reck who was forcing a laugh at me, and decided: whatever grueling work this mission has, you're doing it.
Bearded Reck, completely unaware that he had been branded a 'laborer' on his forehead by a certain person, was now looking at his opponent with a bitter smile. Complete resistance to lightning, fire, and ice—he was simply the bane of Sorcerers. An Assassin's attack couldn't pierce his defense either. What kind of monster was this guy?
Perhaps only a Necromancer's poison magic could stand a chance against him, Reck mused. However, if he knew that my highest resistance among the four elements was poison, I wonder what he would think.
"Your Excellency's power is extraordinary, I am thoroughly convinced of my defeat."
Seeing the battle was over and knowing he no longer had to worry about the opponent's ruthless moves, he thought of Kurt being scorched black and Dika's rear being bruised. Although he lost, he felt he had lost in the most satisfactory manner. The slight depression in his heart immediately vanished, and he couldn't help but cheer up.
"Nonsense, Mr. Reck's magic is quite formidable too." I said, smiling.
In his moment of pride, Reck failed to notice a large hand descending towards his shoulder with unusual speed.
"WHAM—"
A massive force struck his shoulder, and Reck felt the entire world shaking. In fact, it wasn't the world shaking; it was him.
"Your lightning magic, especially, was a real eye-opener." I said, smiling again.
"WHAM—"
This time it was the other shoulder. Reck began to feel the world spinning around him.
"The power of your fire and ice magic is not to be underestimated either." I laughed heartily.
With the final strike, both hands landed on his shoulders simultaneously. Whether it was his imagination or not, Reck felt his already short stature had shrunk by a few more inches.
Finally, Reck staggered off the platform. He needed to rush back and measure his height to see if he had been literally knocked shorter.
The Barbarian way of greeting is truly a weapon of mass destruction—the kind where you're struck and still have to grin and bear it. At that moment, I deeply admired the Barbarian who invented this greeting. He must have been full of love.
After standing silently for a while and seeing no one else step onto the stage, I figured these defiant adventurers should finally calm down. Kurt, representing strength, Dika, representing dexterity, and Reck, representing magic, had all been defeated. The remaining adventurers could now use this as a reference point to gauge whether they had the strength to challenge me. Of course, there was still one combat type: the ranged attacks of the Amazons, but they rarely fought on the stage because the arena was too small for them to perform well.
"Alright, if no one else is going to step up, then for this operation, I hope everyone can properly follow the assignments. This mission is very important, and I don't want any mistakes. Also, one thing: I am an adventurer just like you and I know no one likes to be constrained. So rest assured, I won't give any orders that put you in too difficult a spot, but please make sure to follow the necessary rules..."
A moment later, seeing no more dissatisfaction or protests from the audience, I began to introduce the operation in detail. Of course, the script had been prepared by Soren beforehand; I was merely reading from the text.
"Wait, it's not over yet! I want to challenge you."
Just as I was feeling good about myself, silently reciting the speech I'd memorized all night, getting into the groove, and finding a slight sensation of being a leader, a strange, effeminate, and peculiar voice suddenly came from the audience. It sounded as if the speaker had deliberately altered their voice.
Roar, roar, who is it? Which suicidal bastard is that? Step forward! I'm going to hook his duodenum and appendix out through his ass!
With looks of pity, the adventurers quickly parted, opening a path and dedicating this final stage to the warrior brave enough to face death. The path extended all the way to the source of the voice—a white-haired Druid.
"Huh?"
Seeing the dense crowd part and the path extend to him, and then seeing the angry gaze of the person on the stage shoot straight across the path, the white-haired Druid pointed at himself in confusion, uttering a bewildered question before finally reacting and shaking his head frantically.
"I..."
Just then, he was suddenly pushed from behind. Caught off guard, he took a big step forward. Now, even if he jumped into the Yellow River, he couldn't wash himself clean.
Seeing the Druid's rare white hair, a wave of confusion washed over me. Wasn't this the Druid from that Little Vixen's team? I remembered his name was something like White Wolf. Why would he... Suddenly, I recalled the bizarre voice. I had heard White Wolf's voice before, and it was nothing like that. If I thought about it carefully, the voice sounded suspiciously like the Little Vixen's charming, delicate voice.
So that's it, it's you, you Little Vixen! You're causing trouble for me the moment we return to Kurast! Unforgivable! Just you wait. Next time, right in front of you, I'll sell a bottle of Rejuvenation Potion to someone else for the price of a Cracked Gem, or even give away a Perfect Gem to others, but I won't sell anything to you, making you fret for three days and three nights...
With these extremely "malicious" acts of revenge cycling through my mind, I was about to clarify the misunderstanding for the innocent Uncle White Wolf. However, it seemed too late. The adventurers, naturally fond of excitement, had already started cheering. They all wanted to see a duel between two Druids. And now, White Wolf was already riding the tiger and couldn't get off; even if he hadn't said it, and even if I clarified things for him, for the sake of an adventurer's reputation, he had no choice but to get on the stage and fight a few rounds.
"Ahem, ahem..."
I took the magic sound-amplifier from Soren below the stage and cleared my throat a few times. Not bad; it had the feeling of a megaphone.
"Lucia, you Little Vixen, get out here!!!!"
The full-force roar, amplified untold times by the magic sound-amplifier, transformed into a tangible wave that swept across the entire plaza. Not only the central plaza, but likely the whole adventurer district could hear it. The voices of the thousands of adventurers in the audience were instantly drowned out, like raindrops meeting a giant wave.
The deafening sound, like a giant dragon circling overhead, echoed through the plaza for more than ten seconds before finally ceasing. Once it was quiet, the adventurers covered their ears and looked over with astonishment, not understanding why I had gone crazy. However, mixed in were quite a few looks of admiration and worship, and a closer look revealed they were all Barbarians. Their gazes seemed to say: Damn, that yell was incredible! If you were a Barbarian, your Shout skills would probably gain a few levels just from the sheer power of your voice.
Hey, hey, I don't want your admiration for that!
A few seconds passed. Finally, a Little Vixen—the entire culprit—popped out from behind White Wolf. At this moment, her captivating, loli-like face wore a look of fright. She wasn't afraid of being watched by thousands of adventurers; her beauty had made her accustomed to being the center of attention. But when that guy on the stage roared at her, she somehow panicked.
"W-what do you want?"
Lucia, with her head lowered, was fragile and slightly timid, appearing like a cute, nervous, little rabbit. This immediately won the affection of many male adventurers who didn't know the full story. Since when did Kurast have such a top-tier beauty?
However, there were also many quick-witted adventurers. After hearing Lucia's voice and connecting it with the voice the white-haired Druid used when issuing the challenge, they immediately understood what was going on and couldn't help but exchange knowing smiles. What a farce.
"Get over here."
I glared at her. Scared? Now you know fear? Causing trouble for me is one thing, but step up yourself. Don't push your partner into the fire pit! Is that how you treat a comrade? Don't you know there's a limit to joking? This time, I absolutely have to discipline you properly, otherwise, it's that saying... right, three days without a beating, and you'll climb onto the roof and tear down the tiles.
Under my stern gaze, the path originally cleared for White Wolf was now used by Lucia. Under the scrutiny of thousands of adventurers, she walked forward, her delicate body shrinking pitifully, her large eyes watery—full of grievance and seemingly pleading for mercy. Unexpectedly, the Druid named White Wolf also followed her onto the stage.
Seeing White Wolf standing rigidly behind her like a bodyguard, I couldn't help but let out a wry smile. I seemed to understand a little why this Little Vixen would pull such a daring stunt.
"You've spoiled her too much."
White Wolf shrugged coolly. "Maybe, I've gotten used to it." A bitter smile appeared on his handsome, youthful face.
Alright, I get it, Uncle. You're a masochist.
"Spoiling her will only harm her."
White Wolf glanced at Lucia and smiled. "No, we trust Lucia. She's never ambiguous when it comes to important matters."
"Is that so? That's good then."
Recalling the scene of their team battle in the jungle last time, whether it was judgment or luring the enemy, Lucia performed extremely well, not inferior to any seasoned adventurer. I couldn't help but believe him a little.
Seeing the two grown men chatting so happily, even exchanging smiles of mutual appreciation, Lucia suddenly felt ignored. What the heck? Two grown men, don't be so disgusting! And you, you big idiot, how dare you yell at me! And me? I actually got scared by this idiot.
The more Lucia thought about it, the more wronged she felt. Her already watery eyes began to fill up, making her beautiful eye sockets look like a rippling lake. She sniffled her little nose and lightly bit her pearly teeth.
This mistress is going to strike back.
"Darling—"
The next moment, Lucia, shedding gem-like, crystalline tears, lunged into my arms while I—and everyone else—stared blankly. She cried out the word in a voice just loud enough for every adventurer present to hear.
"Eeeh—?"
"Eeeh, my dead butt!"
I rudely retorted to the Little Ghost who had cried out in alarm inside the necklace.
"Waa!"
Seemingly startled by my preemptive aggressive tone, the Little Ghost froze, displaying an utterly distressed expression that clearly said, "You're the wicked one making the first accusation."
"Aren't you with me every day? Can't you tell what's going on right now?" If I could, I'd really love to reach in and squish, squish that utterly distressed, adorable little face.
"That's not necessarily true! I've been sleeping most of the time lately. Who knows what Little Fan has been up to during this period."
The Little Ghost covered her pale, tender cheek with her finger, sighing helplessly and mimicking Velas. The more she thought about it, the more plausible it seemed, and a neglected-wife-like expression couldn't help but appear on her lovely face.
"The husband, three years into the marriage, has entered a period of boredom, having grown tired of his wife's beautiful body. He starts resorting to violence, making his wife do perverted things for him during the day, and then carousing all night, never coming home. In the end, he brazenly brings a girl who looks like a Little Vixen home to sleep with him, and the poor, weak wife can only helplessly submit to the violence, sniff, sniff~~"
After saying this, the Little Ghost, who seemed to have completely plunged into negative thoughts, hypocritically wiped away a few crocodile tears. Kneeling and sniffing, she actually looked quite convincing.
This... how should I even begin to respond to this? Should I retort to the "beautiful body," or the "perverted things," or the meaningless phrase "sleep with him"? To some extent, what this Little Saintess said was even more lewd and graphic than the Three-No Princess publicly reciting an H-book on the street. Had I taught her too many things I shouldn't have?
After being stunned for who knows how long, I waved my hand, exhausted: "Alright, alright, I get it. I'll love you properly for a lifetime, how about that?"
Didn't you just want to force me to say something so embarrassing? I won't let you succeed that easily. I paused, then added a sentence.
"With the bonus of squishing your face for a lifetime."
"Waa!"
The Little Ghost, who had just revealed a look of smug joy at her scheme succeeding, cried out in surprise again, raising her head pitifully.
"Can I not have the bonus?"
"No way."
I straightened my expression. "It's like fried dough sticks and soy milk; if one is missing, it's not breakfast for me."
"You don't like me at all, sniff, sniff~~"
"Who says? Look at all these people—wasn't I the first one to retort to you?"
"That way of putting it is really hard to accept." Hearing me say that, the Little Ghost's face became even more distressed.
"Alright, let's solve the problem in front of us first, alas..."
After the Little Ghost's antics, Lucia had been clinging to me and acting spoiled for quite some time. My silence had certainly been taken as consent, and to everyone else, it looked like a beautiful moment of mutual affection. Now, it would be even harder to clear up the misunderstanding.
End of Chapter