Elián;
Soooo
Trying to run away last night was a bad idea.
A horrible one.
I woke up this morning, and the first thing I saw was Alana's worried face watching me from beside the door.
The way my soul left my body… I'm pretty sure that if I were a cat, I'd be down to eight lives now.
She hasn't stopped watching me. From my bath to feeding, even while I read some of the novels in the room, she just stood in the corner watching me.
As if, if she left for just a second, I'd try to run away again. I should apologise. She probably got scolded. But at least she wasn't hurt.
I just haven't been able to talk in that direction all morning. I don't have the courage to.
I'm still trying to piece everything together.
Zephan brought me to my room last night and just sat in a corner, watching me until I slept. It was uncomfortable to be honest, but when I realised he wasn't going to leave until I slept, I turned my back on him and forced myself to sleep.
When I woke up, he was gone. I haven't seen him or Koda since I woke up, and that's quite a relief. Also, the breakfast with their father was postponed as, according to Alana, "he had something important to attend to".
It's good. It's all good.
If I don't meet their father yet, it's less pressure. Hopefully, I get time. Time to learn about this place and plot a proper escape plan to get back home.
For goodness' sake, I haven't had pizza in so long… I might cry just thinking about how much I miss the cheesy goodness.
And music?
For someone who's always on headphones listening to music… being torn away from music for this long is hell.
Hell!
I look up at Alana, and I see something shift in her big brown eyes. As if she was hoping I wouldn't acknowledge her or ask for anything.
She's in a simple blue dress and has her hair up in a firm ponytail today.
"I'm bored," I say to her as I drop the novel in my hands, and she blinks at me.
"Do you have any board games?" I question, and she tilts her head.
"Board… games?" She repeats, and I pause.
She's kidding.
She… she doesn't know what board games are??
"What are those?" She asks, and my jaw drops.
"You… Are you joking??" I exclaim, and she blinks at me.
"I… I'm sorry, Master Elián. Is it… is it something I should know?" She questions, and I'm about to speak when I remember Koda's words.
"What's a robot?"
I blink in utter dumbfoundedness, as it dawns on me.
These… these people…
What's wrong with these people??
What time frame have I been transmigrated to??
Now that I think of it, I haven't seen anything tech-wise since I got here.
But that makes no sense. I can swear that on the night I was auctioned, the whole thing was giving this weird sci-fi vibes.
How do they have spotlights, that kind of hospital, syringes… but not board games??
That's right. There's electricity… right?
I look up at the chandelier and only then do I realise… they're glowing crystals… not bulbs.
Okay…
What the fuck is this place!?
"Master Elián?" Alana calls, and I let out a breath.
I'm bored. The last thing I plan to do is explain what board games are to someone who would probably ask me to explain a dozen more things during the explanation.
"Is there something fun I can do? I'll lose my mind if I stay another hour in this room." I reply, and she blinks at me.
Her rabbit ears slowly drops as she looks at me.
"You… you want to leave the room?" She questions, and I give her a look.
"Yes, Alana. Or am I under house arrest now?" I retort, and her brows knot in confusion.
"What… is house arrest?"
She questions, and my jaw drops.
She blinks at me, and I blink back. Silence stretches between us, but it's chaos in my head.
I'm pretty sure if I open my mouth right now, I'm going to scream.
But I can't do that.
It won't be nice.
It's not her fault that her world has no idea what house arrest is. But then again… do I want to be a lesson teacher?
Besides, if I explain it to her, what if it comes back to bite me in the ass?
It's best if I don't explain it to her. Before it gets served to me as a punishment for something in future.
I don't know how long I will have to stay here, but however long it is, I need to be careful.
"It's nothing, Alana," I say as I stand up, and I watch her eyes widen slightly in panic.
"Don't worry. I'm not going back to the garden, and I'm not planning anything fishy. I'm just dying of boredom." I explain, and some of the apprehension leaves her face, but not all of it.
"O…okay. Where do you want to go?" She replies, and I raise a brow.
"I should be asking you, Alana. You know this place better than me, remember?" I reply, and she sighs.
"Would you like to see the flying fishes? It's one of the prettiest sights in the entire estate." She says, and I blink.
Flying fish?
Like the ones on Earth or their flying fishes have dragon wings or something?? With this place… You can never be too sure.
Either way, I'd like to see it. It's better than reading another page of some guy lying to some girl about how he'd rip the heavens open for her.
Boring, torturous crap.
"Master Elián?" Alana calls to regain my attention, and I smile.
"Yeah. Sure. I'd love to." I reply, and she lets out a breath.
"It's a little cold outside, you should get a coat." She says, and without wasting a second more, I rush to the wardrobe and grab the first ash jacket I find.
I turn to her, eager to see something exciting, and she lets out a breath.
"Let's go!"
I say with more excitement than intended as I rush for the door, but she quickly steps in front of me with her hands pressed together in front of her.
Huh?
"What now?" I demand, and her ears fall till they're completely flattened down against her head.
"Please, Master Elián. Please… let's stay… out of trouble…" She whimpers, and I blink at her.
Is she insinuating that I'm a troublemaker?
"If you want something, please ask me. If… if you want to go somewhere… please tell me. I'll come with you. Just… Please don't wander off on your own or do anything risky. The Alphas are very protective of their belongings, and if anything happens to you…"
"Belongings!?" I repeat in astonishment, and she jumps a bit at the tone of my voice.
She looks up at me with trembling eyes that tell me she regrets what she just said, but it's too late to take it back.
"I'm nobody's belonging, Alana!" I correct, and she shivers a bit.
"I… I'm sorry. I meant…" She begins, but I don't let her finish.
I push past her and grab the door knob.
"Let's go."
I push the door open and shove my hands in my pockets as I walk out.
I've fought my whole life to find myself. Become my own person. Be more than what others saw me as. And now… now they're just going to rip that away??
Reduce me to a mere "belonging"!? No fucking way!
"Master Elián, I'm sorry. I…"
"I've heard you, Alana. I won't do anything risky."
*********
Alana and I walk in silence, and even though she hasn't said a single word throughout our walk, I can feel the guilt radiating off her.
She regrets what she said. Referring to me as an item… an object.
But do I blame her? She just said what they believe here. How this fucked up world works.
Here, omegas are items of pleasure. Made for the sole purpose of pleasing Alphas and Betas. Doing whatever they want, no matter what it costs.
It sucks.
Growing up, it was the same. My parents had expectations of me. Expectations they shoved down my throat.
I wanted to learn animation, but they forced me into medical school.
I flunked it and was forced to drop out, and Father never looked at me the same. Ever since then, he has never let me forget how deeply disappointed he is in me.
Mom, on the other hand, could never hold my gaze.
Of all the backlash I received in my entire life… My mother was the first person to make me feel… ugly.
She never said it, tried to hide it… But I could tell. She was disturbed by the colour of my eyes. They creeped her out. Made her uneasy…
She tried so desperately to have another child after me, but nothing worked. She was stuck with me…
And I felt it. In her detachment… Coldness…. how she always looked above my head, or at her phone, each time she spoke to me.
…It all broke me. Ruined me. I wasn't a person… I was just something. A concept. An object…
To my father, a disappointment,
To my mother and every single bully I've known my entire life… a freak.
Now, she must think I'm a gay freak.
I wonder if they've thought about me since I left. Worried? Did they search? Or are they happy that I'm gone? Finally, that unwanted dirt on the precious white fabric of their lives… gone.
God, I fought so hard to be more than just an object, and that is exactly what this place wants to turn me into. I can't… I can't go through it again.
I'm not just an omega… I'm not just a concept. I'm a person.
A real fucking person with a soul. With feelings… emotions. I matter. I'm more than what others decide to see. Every single person is much more than others decide to see.
Why is that so hard for everyone to understand??
"We're here." Alana suddenly says, pulling me out of my thoughts, and when I look up, I freeze.
It's… It's that bridge.
The same one I got knocked off on the night of the accident!
This is the bridge!!