"Hello viewers, this is Shuishui, a reporter from Sun Moon News, bringing you real-time updates on the current situation."
"According to statistics, this marks the thirteenth attack on the Sun Moon Federation in the past few months. And the location I'm currently standing in is one of the sites of this thirteenth attack—the sewage treatment plant near the Seine River."
"Although the attack has ended, the buildings here—just like the previous ones—have been completely destroyed. Fortunately, thanks to the joint efforts of the Federal Investigators and Shrek Academy, the sewage from the plant didn't spill into the Seine River, so the local environment and everyone's living conditions won't be affected."
"Protecting the environment is everyone's responsibility. Rivers and oceans belong to all of us, and we must not allow our water sources to be polluted!"
After a brief report, Shuishui, wearing a mask, approached two individuals and began introducing them to the viewers.
"Next, let's interview the two captains responsible for handling this situation—Captain Tang Huo from the Federal Investigation Squad, and… Captain Haojing, representing Shrek Academy's team."
"Captain Tang Huo, the Federation has clearly suffered numerous attacks over the past few months. However, in each chase, the attackers have repeatedly escaped and even inflicted enormous property damage on the Federation. What is your view on this situation?"
Whoa—starting with a huge question?
Just watching the spectacle isn't enough for Sun Moon News—these guys really go straight for the throat!
Haojing, standing beside them, felt his heart skip a beat. He hadn't expected such a sensitive question to be the opener. Thankfully, the reporter didn't start with him.
This type of question isn't something you just casually ask—especially when it directly implies the Federation is incompetent.
"Why haven't you caught them yet, after all this time?"
Once that kind of sentiment spreads, it would severely damage the Federation's image. People might start speculating—did someone in the Federation take a bribe? Is there a traitor on the inside? Otherwise, how could they fail to capture the culprits for so long?
"Of course, it's because the enemy is also very powerful," Captain Tang Huo squinted slightly, seeming completely unfazed. "We are the Federation's elite squad—each of us is at least a Two-Word Battle Armor Master, and our combat power rivals that of Title Douluos. But even so, we can't track them at all… That means they're even more powerful than we imagined!"
That's your answer?!
Haojing's eyes widened again. This wasn't what they had discussed at all! Why would you choose to answer it directly? Isn't that just boosting the morale of the attackers?
After that, Shuishui asked several more questions, and Captain Tang Huo answered all of them directly—and all his answers were pretty awful…
Tch, just as expected—these Federation guys are useless. When it really counts, it's still us from Shrek Academy who have to step up!
Sensing things going off-track, Haojing immediately stepped forward, stood before Shuishui, and spoke solemnly:
"But no matter how powerful the enemy is, we must fulfill our duty!"
If someone messed up, it's fine to take the blame personally—but Shrek Academy must never be tarnished!
Born in Shrek City and later joining the Shrek Inner Court, Haojing was a purebred Shrek member since childhood. Naturally, he cared deeply about the Academy's reputation. Even if his own name got ruined, he'd never allow the name of Shrek to be sullied!
"To this day, the mastermind remains hidden in the shadows, afraid to show themselves—proof of how much they fear us."
"One Sun Moon Federation may not be enough—but together with Shrek Academy, we will absolutely deal them a fatal blow!"
A textbook example of stepping on others to elevate yourself.
We from Shrek Academy only just got involved, so it's understandable we haven't fully adapted yet. But you?
You clowns from the Federation have been humiliated over a dozen times—perfect stepping stones!
"And most importantly… we've already obtained leads on the mastermind!" Haojing's eyes narrowed, and his tone turned serious.
"Within the coming week, we will absolutely capture the culprits and bring them to justice!"
"All evil will eventually be brought to justice!"
As he said this, Captain Haojing struck a combat pose, his eyes burning with unshakable resolve. Countless viewers were inspired and willing to believe his words.
Shrek Academy making such a bold promise was no small matter. It now seemed clear—the mastermind was done for.
Historically, no one who made an enemy of Shrek Academy ended well.
However, just as everyone was thinking this, an unexpected voice rang out from the side—
"Pffft—Hahahaha! Are you serious? With that majestic pose of yours… sprawled in a pile of sewage?"
Captain Tang Huo finally couldn't hold back and burst out laughing. His words made reporter Shuishui's eyes light up—was this a huge scoop?
"To be honest with you, the people from Shrek Academy really are heroes!"
"When the sewage started leaking out, they used their own bodies to plug the outlet. In the end, they even passed out from the stench. That's not something I could've done. Probably only people like you could manage that—after all, you're 'Sh*t-lai-ker', right?"
"How's that for being treated like the Sea God's Pavilion elders? Last time the elders ate sh*t—this time it's the students! Truly united from top to bottom!"
"Watch your mouth! How could Shrek Academy ever be like that?!" Haojing immediately blew up. You can insult him, sure—but never insult Shrek, especially not the elders of the Sea God's Pavilion!
Are they about to fight? Fight! Come on, fight!
Shuishui's eyes sparkled with excitement. This was a live broadcast, and now this kind of massive scandal was erupting—including the Sea God's Pavilion?
She didn't know exactly how big of a storm this would stir across the Douluo Continent, but she knew one thing for sure—
She was getting a raise!
"Oh right, one more thing!"
Just as the interview was about to wrap up, Captain Tang Huo stepped directly in front of the camera and waved to the livestream audience.
What was he about to do?
Everyone at the scene—and everyone watching—had question marks pop up over their heads.
Right then, Captain Tang Huo pulled a fox mask from his coat and slowly put it on.
"This time, Lord Hanabi had a lot of fun, but not quite enough… After all, there were only a few Shrek members—not enough to make a grand show."
"But no worries… One day, Lord Hanabi will personally visit Shrek Academy to play a magnificent game with all of you!"
"Look forward to it~"
In a flash of red light, Captain Tang Huo's tall figure dissolved into floating red petals, leaving behind only a white piece of paper drifting down from the sky.
"What is that?"
As the camera zoomed in, everyone could see the content of the photo—
It was an image of Shrek Academy members heroically battling in a pool of sewage!