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Jack couldn't remember feeling this out of his depth in a long time. He always knew what to do, having lived through pretty much any situation or scenario one could think of, he had a set of rules and rituals he followed before running into anything he was unsure of. This, though, was a nightmare! It had been so bad he'd rung River, which wasn't something he was known to do, they tended to fight as much as they flirted. She hadn't been happy, she'd been in some cave being chased by something hairy with their daughter and her husband and really didn't have time for his dramatics. He knew later Danni's than her, and knew it would be fine so he needed to 'grow a pair' and wait it out like the rest of them.
How was that helpful advice? She wasn't the one who had to see Danni's face, heartbroken at the knowledge that he was her dad. She wasn't the one who was left waiting to see if she ever came back, even though logic told him she had to otherwise he wouldn't have a million memories with her. But she'd been hours now, how long was he going to have to wait for her? River said it was his own fault for not even checking to see if she knew. He hated when she was right, so he made up some crap about thinking she'd been to see River first, and the other woman explaining it to her. He'd managed to ramble out the lie calmly considering how worked up he'd bee, before hanging up and vowing never to ring her again.
He couldn't even follow her, Lord only knew where the Doctor had taken her to. They'd always fought over her, but Jack knew the Time Lord was just not good enough for his Danni-Girl. He lied to her constantly, put her in danger again and again and failed to keep her away from the Master on more than one occasion. And yet, no one seemed to agree with his point of view, and when he saw how happy Danni was when she was with him, he could only grumble and keep his mouth shut.
So, he was back to pacing the floor in his living, back and forth like he hadn't done in a long time. He'd been waiting for a phone call then as well, and when he'd gotten it he'd cried at the Doctor proclaiming 'it's a girl!' on the other side, even though he'd known that for many years. This time he wasn't expecting such glorious news, but just having her talk to him would have calmed him down. He'd not left her any messages, but he'd been ringing her since she'd left and she hadn't picked up once.
There was a knock on the front door and he growled, chucking his phone onto the sofa before storming to the door. Honestly, he would have hoped by this century door-to-door sales would have petered out, but people would always want to swindle you out of a few credits. He really didn't have the patience for them right now, but when he chucked the door open and saw the Doctor and Danni stood there, his anger faded into sheer relief.
"Danni..." He breathed and she stared stoically back.
"I'm here to listen to what you have to say." She told him with almost no emotion on her face, "Then I'm leaving." He nodded, stepping out of the way to let her in. Her demenour was immediately worrying; all her regenerations had found it hard to disconnect emotionally from a situation, something she didn't really get from either River or himself.
"Of course. Anything you want." He offered and she took his invitation, heading into the hallway and towards the living room. The Doctor took a step forward to follow her but Jack stopped him, "Not you." He snapped.
"Let him in." Danni demanded and Jack looked at her.
"But he-"
"You're just as bad as each other!" She declared, "Let him in." Jack smirked smugly, happily stepping out of the way this time.
"Got caught out?" He taunted but the Doctor ignored him, following his wife like he always would. Jack watched the man retreat for a moment, feeling slightly better knowing that he was no longer lying to his daughter, then joined them. He sat on an armchair across from Danni, who was perched on the sofa. The Doctor hovered uncertainly, not knowing whether he should sit next to her or not. She shot him a look, one that said that he should stop dithering and he sat next to her- but not too close, he didn't want to upset her.
"I've been trying to call you." Jack told her and she nodded.
"I know. So did he," She nodded at the Doctor, "and I didn't answer then either."
"You weren't with him?" He asked, really trying his hardest not to sound please and Danni's eyes narrowed angrily.
"No." She replied shortly, "But I'm not here for that. You wanted to explain. So, explain." Jack nodded, sighing slightly as he shifted forward. He could tell this wasn't going to be easy, but then again nothing involving family ever was.
"What would you like to know?" He asked her.
"When?" Was her one word reply.
"It was just after River had graduated from Luna University. You had a little celebration on the TARDIS, a lot of booze was drunk." He smiled wistfully, "I always thought I'd remember it, but I woke up the next morning and couldn't remember a damn thing."
"So I was a mistake?" She asked bluntly and he shook his head.
"Never a mistake." He promised, "More a happy accident. When I found out she was pregnant, I was beyond ecstatic. You were a beautiful baby. These giant grey eyes, like something out of a cartoon." He smiled at her, "The most beautiful thing I'd ever seen, and I'd had children before."
Danni didn't like the way he was looking at her, like he had some claim to say that. Her dad, her actual dad used to say the same thing about her, and hearing Jack echo it made her stomach churn painfully, "When did you know it was me?" She asked, deciding to ignore his commentary, "Before or after you gave me up?" Jack grimaced slightly.
"Before. A long time before." He admitted, "Back at the beginning of the 21st century, just before Gallifrey was brought back by the Master, you came to see me. River ended up breaking the news to me, but I've known since then."
"Back before-" She murmured before turning to the Doctor, "You've not known that long, have you?" She asked him, needing to hear him confirm it.
"Only the last couple of years." He promised quietly, "You know I wouldn't have-" She shook her head, holding her hands up, halting him in his dithering.
"I don't want excuses." She barked, "I don't want anyone's excuses. I just want to know what happened." She turned back to Jack, "So, when I was at Amy and Rory's, you knew? That's why you were so keen on me moving in with you?" He nodded and she took a deep breath, trying to gather her thoughts. She had a million and one things she wanted to ask. She wanted to scream at him, demand why she hadn't been 'good enough' to raise as his own, and cry over how even after all these years, she missed her parents terribly and now they weren't even hers. They'd been taken away from her. Jack had taken them away from her! How dare he even still be in her life after what he'd done?!
Instead, she nodded a couple of times, keeping her anger inside as best she could. She wasn't about to give him the satisfaction of her shouting and screaming, "How old was I when you gave me away?"
"Three weeks and two days." Jack replied solemnly, "I didn't want to, I need you to know that. Handing you over to River for the last time was the hardest thing I've ever done."
"I don't want to know that." She snapped, furious with herself for the tears that appeared in her eyes, "I don't care how you felt, Jack. You still gave me up. You still handed me to River and left me in another universe. I just want to know what happened, nothing else."
"You have to understand, it was one of the hardest things I've ever had to do!" He insisted and the Doctor watched as his wife's guard went up. Jack wasn't playing along right, if he wasn't careful then Danni would run from them both, "If I'd had my way, you would have stayed with me, Danni-Girl, I promise!" Even the Doctor grimaced at that. Jack couldn't have possibly known, but that was probably the worst thing he could have said at that point. True, that was kind of his fault, but Danni's eyes narrowed angrily and even Jack seemed to know he'd misspoken, no matter how unintentionally it had been.
"Then why did you?" Danni exclaimed, "You handed me over to another universe, Jack! And you want me to have sympathy for you?"
"No, no that's not it." Jack tried but she stood up, shaking her head.
"I need a minute." She declared, "This? This is all too much." And with that, she left the two men in the living room, heading to the kitchen to clear her head. Jack leant back in his chair, running his hand over his face. Nothing was going to plan, he knew he didn't lose her, but he could see the time between now and then stretching further and further apart. He just didn't know what else to say to make it better for her. He hated seeing her suffering so much, and it was all his fault. If only he'd kept his big mouth shut.
"She'll come around." The Doctor said, trying to reassure him and Jack moved his hand from his eyes, looking over at him with a glare.
"Oh, because she's forgiven you already?" He taunted.
"She hasn't." The Doctor replied. Jack did feel slightly better at that revelation, sitting up slightly straighter in the chair. Danni always forgave him much too easily.
"She hasn't?" He asked and the Doctor shook his head.
"Nope. I don't think she will for a long time." He looked towards the kitchen door sadly, knowing that it was his own doing but with the determination that he could fix it, "I can get her back on your side, though."
"Really?" Jack retorted, "Please, do tell." If the Doctor noticed the sarcasm in his voice, he didn't comment on it. Instead, he shifted back so he was facing the other man.
"She's terrified of being like River." He explained, "None of what exists in this universe exists in her other one, so if you can guarantee her that you didn't lose her before handing her over, she might not react so violently to everything you say."
"Why are you telling me this?" Jack asked, suspicious of any time the Doctor helped anyone. He'd seen Danni cry too many times because of the man in front of him. Years of cleaning up his messes had strained their friendship, and even though Jack would still die - and die again - for the Time Lord, he didn't really trust him anymore.
"Because she can't be on her own." The Doctor told him simply, sounding very much like he was about to die, and soon, "If she forgives you, she won't be, will she?"
"Of course not." Jack replied and the Doctor stood up, nodding.
"Then neither of us have anything to worry about." He smiled at Jack, "I'll go get her. Let her shout at me for a little bit."
~0~0~0~
Danni was stood at the back window, looking out into the small, uniform garden out of the back of Jack's house. It was very green; green grass, green trees, green bushes. It was such an odd green, though, it looked very artificial. Maybe that was just the time period they were in; she wasn't actually sure when they were, but when you jumped around time and space at the drop of a hat, you tend to lose a grasp on things like years and days. Knowing the time of day, whether she was eating lunch or dinner, was what she spent most of her energy on. Everything else sorted slipped into place after that.
The door opened, but she didn't turn around, "Danni?" The Doctor called over gently and she spared him a glance.
"Are all the trees fake here?" She asked him, "Or is it just a fashion choice?" He headed over to the window, looking out at the sea of green.
"I think it's just new breeds of plants." He told her, because they all looked incredibly real to him but he could see why she would think otherwise, "He's trying his best, but he promises to only answer your questions."
"A week ago I had a mum and dad who loved me, who I left behind, but they were mine. Now I have a mum and dad who weren't my mum and dad, and a mum and dad who didn't want me. I don't know what to do, Theta." He took a step closer, standing behind her as he gingerly wrapped his arms around her. When she didn't pull away, barely even moved at all, he tightened his grip and placed a kiss on her hair.
"Your mum and dad loved you very much." He promised, looking at their faint reflected in the window. She looked so right in his arms, and he hated that he'd ever have to let her go, "That will never change, no matter what. They took you in out of the kindness of their hearts. They could have turned you away, but they took one look at you and said 'She's ours'." He saw her lips twitch slightly in the window, "They never let you go. They took you on caravan holidays, and looked after you when you were sick and told you stories at night. When it comes to family, blood rarely means anything, and they took one look at you and obviously knew they'd love you for the rest of their lives."
"I don't feel like me, anymore." She whispered. She'd lost a bit of herself when she'd regenerated, but she'd never not felt like Danni, just that something was new and different. It had scared her, but now everything she'd thought she'd known about herself was sliding away.
He turned her around, seeing the tears shining in her eyes and smiled so softly at her she felt her hearts twinge, "Your mother and father will always be Elizabeth and Martin Fielding. You are Danielle Fielding, and no one, not even some archaeologist and a flirty, handsome, American Captain," she couldn't help the giggle that escaped, even if it was slightly wet sounding, "can take that away from you. And I should know, I've changed enough for both of us."
She leant her head on his chest, letting her hug him because it was all she needed at that moment, "How is it that I can be incredibly mad at you, and still glad you're here?" She asked him.
"Because I'm the Doctor; it's how most people feel when I'm around." He told her, frowning slightly, "Perhaps I should look into that."
"Maybe." She agreed and they fell silent. It was infuriating how calm his words made her, actually, because still felt so betrayed by him. Every time he told her he would tell her everything, he kept something back and she'd tried to understand it. It probably came from being so old and doing things that he regretted. She could have understood, if only he didn't keep promising her.
"What happens now?" She asked him.
"Well," He replied softly, "we go back into the other room, where you finish talking to Jack. Then we leave. You take as long as you need to go over what you find out today then, when you're ready, we go and see River-"
"I don't want to see River." She interrupted, "Ever again." Since she'd come out of Clara's house, every mention of River was met with a quick and passionate rejection. He wasn't sure why she was suddenly so overly angry at River, so much so than both him and Jack combined, but he knew now wasn't the time to push it.
"Okay, then when you're ready and know if you want Jack in your life or not, we deal with it."
He was being incredibly logical about the entire affair, which seemed terribly unlike him, "You're trying to get on my good side, aren't you?" She accused.
"I want you happy." He replied, "And that'll take as long as you want it to, but I told you, I'm not going anywhere." Until he died, anyway. She squashed down that little voice, she couldn't deal with all the information that had been thrown at her, so she stuck to the one. She let the Doctor go, not taking his hand like she might have done under different circumstances, taking a deep breath as she looked at the door. She could do this, she was stronger than she thought. She was the bloody Time Child, people had heard of her for a reason. She could do this.
She headed back into the living room, startling Jack who had been staring intently at the door, wondering if he should go in after them. She and the Doctor sat back down on the sofa, the Doctor slightly closer to her this time, much to Jack's displeasure. She looked to the Doctor for reassurance, something that again annoyed Jack, then back to Jack.
"I have a mum and dad." She told him, "They loved me very much, even though I wasn't theirs. I don't know if I can accept you as anything more than Jack."
"They did a wonderful job raising you." Jack replied, "Who you are is to do with them, not me and River." She nodded, thinking on her words very carefully. She had to stay calm for this, she could breakdown and scream and shout to her hearts' content once she got back on the TARDIS. She didn't want Jack to see how shaken and uncertain she felt. She was an adult, she could do this. All she had to do was get out of the door and into the TARDIS and she could have centuries to decide how to proceed. Get the information she needed, then leave. Just out of the house, that's all she had to do.
"I need to think about this." She started slowly, "There's too many of you, I can't think straight. Is there anything else you have to tell me?" She looked at him expectantly, and he glanced at the Doctor. He didn't want to follow his advice, after all he wasn't sure if the Doctor was just trying to get one up on him or not, but at this point it felt like he had nothing to lose.
"Between the time you were conceived, and the time we left you with your mum and dad," he started, ignoring how much it hurt, even after all this time, to think of the Fieldings as her parents, "you were never out of anyone's sight. There isn't a minute unaccounted for, you were always safe and you were never taken."
"Really?" She asked before she could stop herself, frowning at how happy she sounded at the news.
"Never." Jack promised, "What happened to Melody never happened to you." She nodded, feeling the words roll over her, relaxing muscles she didn't even know she'd tensed.
"Okay." She replied, standing up and looking around the room, "I need to go now. I'll... I don't know, I'll do something." Jack shot off his chair, standing in front of her before she could leave.
"I love you, Danni-Girl." He told her, "I did before I knew you were my daughter, and I have ever since." She shook her head, back away from him.
"I can't, Jack." She told him, "Not right now, I'm sorry." And she left before either man could stop her. The Doctor patted Jack on the arm.
"She'll call when she's ready." He told the impossible man before following, quietly entering the TARDIS to see her pacing backwards and forwards.
"Can we go?" She asked as the door clicked shut, "Now? Please?" He nodded, a slight jog in his step as he headed to the console, flying them away. She hadn't stopped spacing, but he'd taken off pretty smoothly so she wasn't thrown off course. He watched her chew on her lip, obviously trying to come to terms with what Jack had told her, fitting it into her train of thought. She looked so out of her depth, at least when she was scared she could be comforted. There were too many emotions, too many things fighting in her head for her to settle on one feeling or train of thought and it was as exhausting as it was tired.
"Hey," he whispered, grabbing her when she was on her path back towards him, stopping her. He cupped her face, "you'll work out what's best for you. It'll all be okay." He dipped his head, intending on giving her a quick, reassuring kiss on the top of her head but she backed away from him, her face screwing up in confusion.
"What are you doing?" She asked and he quickly let go, immediately seeing his mistake. He wasn't even aiming for her lips.
"I-I-" He stuttered, trying to think of something, anything, before settling on his default response, "I'm sorry, it was just a reflex."
"You lied to me." She replied, "You can't think that I'm just going to jump back into your arms."
"Of course not." He told her, "I mean, that's not to say I wouldn't want you to, but if you're not comfortable, then of course not."
"I'm not comfortable." She admitted, "I think I'm going to have a nap, my head hurts." He nodded.
"What do you want me to do?" He asked. The apologetic smile she shot him, trying to soften the blow of what she was going to say, hurt almost the same as what she said.
"To not be in the bedroom." She whispered. He couldn't react straight away, but the way she looked at him, like she was expecting him to protest, had him nodding.
"I'll be here if you need anything." He told her, "Anything at all."
"Thanks." She replied lamely, before turning, deciding to head off before she changed her mind. Then, at the last minute, she turned back and placed a kiss on his cheek, "Love you, Theta." She murmured, darting off and leaving her and leaving him completely stunned once again by her.