Danni hung up her coat on the same hanger she always did when she came home, hanging it over her scarf before placing her hat on top. She had done it the same way every day this week, although it wasn't for any other reason than she'd done it that way on the first day and it had stuck. After all, she put her scarf on first and her hat on last, in fact it was probably the most inconvenient way of hanging them up. She'd probably change it at some point, but not now.
Her brows furrowed slightly at the smell of freshly cooked cake that seemed to be rapidly filling the room. She hadn't been home all day, that wasn't right. Nor would her cooking smell quite as delicious, but someone was obviously baking a rather nice cake in her kitchen. She headed towards the small make-shift room that had been built by the lovely people of Christmas for the pair, in a little room just off from their main living room that had once just been a storage cupboard for the chapel. It was a little cramped, but it was theirs.
"Doctor?" She called uncertainly, "Is everything okay?" She was sure that no one was supposed to be coming around today; they'd been cooked for more often than not since they'd taken residence on the planet, but there was always warning.
"Danni!" He cried out in surprise, "I'll just be a…" There was a loud clatter on the floor, something decisively metal hitting the stone, with the Doctor yelling out in unison.
"What's going on?" She asked, hand pushing the door open.
"Don't come in!" He shouted loudly and she paused, "Everything is fine, but I thought you would be a bit longer. Doesn't school finish at 3?"
"It's half past, sweetie." She told him with a small smile on her face. He'd never been able to tell time in a small way – he seemed to lose hours and minutes, but his days and years had always been spot on.
"Is it?" He called back, "Well, er, don't come in. It's – I'll come get you." She rolled her eyes, pushing the door open anyway.
"What are you do-" she trailed off when she saw the mess he'd made of the kitchen. There was flour and pots everywhere, and the bowl he had dropped had apparently been full, because even though it was upside down, there was white liquid leaking out from underneath it. He was stood at the old stove they've been given, looking at her like a deer caught in headlights, eyes wide and his hair almost completely white with flour.
"Danni, I can explain…" He started but was cut off by her laughing and he frowned, "Why are you laughing?"
"You look like an old man!" She told him, "It's about time." She walked over, still giggling slightly as she ruffled his hair, the flour raining down on the both like snow, "What are you doing?"
"Well, it was the end of your first week at work." He replied, "I thought we should celebrate, so I went to Heather, who sent me to Haley, who gave me the recipe. She wanted to help, but it was only a cake, I thought I could manage on my own…" He looked at the mess around him, "It went a bit wrong."
"The cake smells lovely." She promised, seeing the slightly disappointed look on his face, "How long has it been in?" His brows furrowed for a moment before his eyes widened and he turned, hastily opened the oven. No smoke came billowing out, which was always a good sign, but the cake he pulled out was definitely quite burnt. Danni couldn't help it – the Doctor, stood there, holding a burnt cake whilst covered in flour, staring at the cake with a pout on his face – and she started laughing again. She grabbed a towel and took it off him, placing it down on the side, "I'm sure we can save it."
"I followed the recipe as well." He moaned, "You came home too early!"
"No, you left the cake in too long!" She replied, pretending to be offended even as she grinned at him, "Do I need to teach you how to tell the time? Maybe you could come to school next week, that's what we're doing on Wednesday!"
"I'm a Time Lord." He retorted, "I don't need to tell the time. I know the time." She rolled her eyes as he turned back to the stove to turn it off, convinced that she had agreed with him.
It was with a small smirk on her face that she scooped some of the flour of the table he had been using to mix the ingredients, waiting for the most opportune moment to use it. The moment he turned back around she chucked it at him, hitting him square in the chest with some of it, the rest spreading out around him in a dust cloud. Once he opened his eyes, deeming it safe not to get anything in his eyes, he shot her a look. Not just one of exasperation, but one of challenge.
"Did you really just do that?" He asked, "You're not a child anymore, Danielle."
"You're just annoyed that I got you first." She replied smugly and he smirked, reaching into a bag of ingredients next to him.
"It won't happen again." He promised and she laughed as he threw some dried fruit at her before chasing her around the kitchen.
~0~0~0~
Clara absentmindedly placed a plate in front of her father, piled with beef and veg before glancing at the kitchen once again. Danni had hidden herself away in the other room, having pretty much gone silent when the TARDIS had finally disappeared from view. Clara, still holding the beef, had gently encouraged her to come inside her flat, and she had followed with no resistance. All she had done was walk straight into the kitchen and had stood staring out of the window.
"Has she not got her own family to go home to?" Her aunt asked with her usual tact.
"I am her family." Clara bit out, trying to not sound so infuriated as she did, "If she wants to stay here, she can." She turned to her Nan, a smile back on her face, "Would you like some more gravy, Nan?" She asked cheerfully.
"She doesn't have to hide in the kitchen, though." Her aunt continued.
"If she wants to stay there for the next ten years she can." Clara retorted, "Now eat up, it'll get cold, and we can't have that, can we?" She sat down just in time to hear the plates from her kitchen falling to the floor, crockery smashing against her tiles but she didn't even flinch.
"What is she doing now?" Her aunt demanded, "She'd better be paying for that!"
Clara shot up off her chair again, glaring opening at the other woman, "If she wants to break everything in this flat, she can." She snapped, "If you don't like it, you can go home!" And with that she disappeared into the kitchen, finding Danni stood in a pile of broken plates and bowls, shaking slightly.
"I'm sorry. I'll pay for it." She told Clara, tears running down her cheeks and Clara shook her head, walking over and pulling her in for a hug.
"It's okay." She promised, "You'll be okay. He'll be back for you, you know he can't look after himself." Danni shook her head into Clara's shoulder as she clung to the other woman.
"You told him to change the future, so he is." She whispered, "I've got thousands of years before I die, doesn't mean I have to spend that time on Trenzalore. He's cutting me off from it so I'm not stuck. He's going to die all on his own and I can't get back!"
"It'll be okay." Clara promised her, "You don't know that. You know what he's like, he always panics when it comes to you. Once he's calmed down, he'll come back for you."
Danni nodded, but didn't let go of her friend, squeezing her eyes shut. It wasn't the first time he'd left her behind because he thought it was for the best. Her Theta always acting irrationally because of her, because he loved her and was so scared to lose her. That was why she couldn't fight, not because she might get hurt, but because of what would happen when she got hurt. Once he'd calmed down, he'd be back for her.
But she couldn't wait that long. She needed a way back, to berate him and yell at him and make sure he never did this again. They had no guarantee that he wouldn't already be dead. Without her there to come home to he'd just risk himself more, stay that one more moment that would get him killed. She couldn't lose him, not now. She knew it was coming but not like this, not without her there!
All she needed was transport. And she knew one man who could help. She pulled back slowly from Clara, her eyes darting as her plan quickly and haphazardly came together, "Do you still have Jack's number?" She asked the young woman, who nodded but frowned as she grabbed her mobile phone off the kitchen counter.
"It's from the future, though." She replied but Danni grabbed it out of her hand anyway.
"It doesn't matter." She replied, "I think the whole 'across time and space' thing has something to do with the TARDIS, otherwise how would you ring us and get the right versions every time?" She held the phone up to the ear, "She'll help me; I know she will." The moment it started ringing, Danni started pacing. It was only a couple of steps forward and a couple steps back, but it helped the bubbling of anxiety as she waited for him to finally answer.
"Clara, to what do I owe this pleasure?" Jack's flirty tone after over five hundred years was absolutely glorious and Danni felt herself crying in relief and heartache.
"Jack, where are you?" She asked quickly, "Are you anywhere near Clara's flat?"
"Danni? Why are you calling me from Clara's phone?" He asked, immediately suspicious.
"Please, how close are you?" She asked again, desperate for an answer. Explanations could wait until after she got back to her husband. He couldn't die on his own, didn't anyone understand that?!
"I can be there in less than an hour." He told her, "Danni, what's wrong?"
"I need your manipulator." She told him bluntly, "The Doctor's left me here, he's going to die Jack! I need to get to him."
"Danni, you know…" Jack started, his voice apologetic and Danni shook her head, stopping her pacing.
"No, you have to help me!" She exclaimed, "You always help me!"
"You're trying to get to Trenzalore, aren't you?" Jack asked.
"Where else would I be going? You know what's going to happen there, Jack!"
"I don't have the manipulator anymore." He broke to her as gently and she squeezed her eyes closed, a pained look on her face.
"Of course, UNIT has it." She whispered brokenly. The Doctor and Clara had both told her what had happened during the time of the three Doctors, when they had managed to save Gallifrey. Clara had used Jack's manipulator to get to the Doctors in the past, "I'd forgotten about that. It's been a while."
"I'm sorry, Danni-Girl." He replied softly and she shook her head.
"Please, Jack. I need get back to him." She whimpered, "Please, you're my dad, you have to help me."
"I'll be there in less than an hour," He promised firmly, "and I'll get in contact with River in the meantime. She should be there before I am, but you should try too. You know how she feels about me." Danni nodded, remembering how the archaeologist really wasn't a fan of Jack.
"I'll do my best." She replied, "Hurry, though, yeah?"
"I'll come as fast as I can." He promised, "It'll be fine, Danni-Girl. I promise." She nodded before pulling the phone away from her ear once again. She stared at the screen until Jack hung up and it changed to Clara's home screen.
"Do you have River's number?" She asked and Clara shook her head sadly, "Of course not. Life's never that easy, is it?"
"Very rarely." Clara replied softly, "But Jack will find her, we'll get you back to him." Danni couldn't believe her, no matter how much she wanted to. Sure, eventually, they'd get hold of River. Somehow they would and she would take Danni to Trenzalore, because all River had ever wanted to do was make her happy. But she knew she'd never make it back in time. Otherwise the Doctor would have been back for her by now. He might have run off without a word, but if he had been able to come back, he would have the moment the TARDIS had finally disappeared from view.
~0~0~0~
Clara was one step from throwing out her Aunt Linda when Jack had turned up. Honestly, the woman had decided that Danni was obviously intruding on their Christmas, and then she decided that Clara needed to find a nice new boy to settle down with. Even her father had told her to shut up, but she never listened to anyone but herself.
Of course, her tune had changed when the incredibly handsome American captain had turned up. No, then she was all giggles and laughs and smiles but Jack didn't seem to notice. He flirted with her, but it was very half-heartedly, his eyes only looking for his daughter.
"She's in the…" Clara tried but her Aunt wasn't having any of it, placing a hand on Jack's arm.
"Why don't you sit down and have some beef?" She asked Jack with the biggest smile Clara had ever seen on her face, "It's not turkey, but I hope you don't mind anyway."
"Linda, sit down." Clara snapped, finally at the end of her tether, "She's in the kitchen, Jack." She told the America, who was in there like a shot.
"I thought her husband was that flouncy haired naked one?" Linda asked spitefully.
"He is." Clara snapped back, "That's her dad. Now sit down." She followed Jack into the kitchen, finding the two hugging tightly. She smiled softly, knowing the man could probably help Danni better than anyone.
Danni had taken one look at Jack and had broken down into loud sobs, chucking her arms around him and letting him hold her tight. It had been so long since she had seen him, centuries and centuries, but she had remembered his face the moment he had walked through the door. She had tried not to think about how much she had missed him, and then as she had lived and the pain from the missing had dulled, much like it did with anyone you could never see again. It always hurt, but it wasn't quite so sharp as it had once been.
But now, it all hit her in full force, and with her sheer panic at her husband dying somewhere she couldn't get to had her sobbing uncontrollably, crying out for him. He gave her that tight squeezing hug only Jack had ever been able to do, but only for a moment, before he held her in front of him.
"How long has it been?" He asked her and she wiped her eyes with the back of her hand.
"Five hundred years." She replied, almost looking guilty, "Sorry."
Jack rolled his eyes before turning to look at Clara, "Have you had any contact with River?" He asked and Clara shook her head.
"Neither of her have any way of doing so." She replied, "We were waiting for you. If you give me her number, we can both call until she answers."
Jack nodded, pulling out his phone and handing it to Clara, "Just don't look through the photos." He warned cheekily, "There's a few from a night out a few weeks ago that are probably best unviewed."
"Gross, Jack!" Danni exclaimed and Clara rolled her eyes.
"I'll bear that in mind." She drawled before placing a hand on Danni's arm, smiling warmly at her, "Will you be okay?" She asked, "I'll just nip out and give her a few rings, I won't be long." Danni nodded.
"Thanks sweetie." She replied honestly, because Danni knew what her friend was doing for her. Danni could have, quite easily, rang River herself. They all knew River would listen to her if she had managed to get hold of the unpredictable woman, but she needed some time with Jack, and Clara knew that. She had always felt like Clara understood her and she had always been incredibly grateful about that. She had really missed their companion over the years.
Clara walked out, leaving the two stood in the kitchen, Jack looking around with an appraising eye. He immediately saw the black bin bag by the door, and the fact that Clara didn't seem to have anything on her counters at all. Not even a misplaced mug from a cup of tea that had been abandoned, "Let me guess, you went to town on the plates?" He asked and Danni flushed slightly at being caught.
"I'm going to pay for it." She insisted, "But she was very nice about it. Even helped me clear it all away."
Jack shook his head, "The moment you found out UNIT had my manipulator you could have contacted them. They're more likely to listen to you than they even are the Doctor." He pointed out.
"I'm trying to get to a warzone, not extend it." She replied, "When he… When we left, the Daleks were taking hold. I don't even know if he's still alive, but UNIT will take one look at that and decide that it's going to be a threat on them. You know what they're like, even Kate was incredibly overdramatic."
"She is." He corrected with an amused smirk, "Still haven't quite got hold of your tenses, have you?"
"Forgive me, I've not been on Earth for five centuries, I can barely remember what technology I'm supposed to expect." Danni snapped in reply, "The TV actually startled me, do you know what that's like? It's embarrassing."
"You managed to stay away from television for five hundred years?" Jack asked, a smirk on his face as he teased her more. The one thing that always persisted through her regenerations was her love of television, "Five hundred years without The Simpsons? How did you cope?"
"Terribly." She replied, "But the Doctor helped." Her face fell slightly, "I need to get back to him. He can't go through it alone, Jack. He deserves better."
"Well, that's one opinion." He mumbled and she shot him a look, "We're going to get you back." He sighed softly. He knew how much she loved the Time Lord, but if he was going to be pulling stunts like this and hurting her, he can't say he was the Eleventh Doctor's biggest fan right now. He just hoped it was a onetime deal for them both.
"I know." She said, "But will it be in time? I feel like every minute I'm stuck here is just adding to the chance that he'll be dead before we'll get there! He can't die on his own!"
"Maybe he wants to." Jack reasoned, "He is the one who dump-" Danni glared at him and he held his hands up, "He is the one who left you behind. Maybe he doesn't want you there to see that."
"Well I want to be there!" She snapped.
"It's his death." Jack reasoned.
"Yes, and I'm the one who is being left behind!" Danni exclaimed angrily, "I'm the one who has to somehow continue on, and maybe just maybe I needed this to be able to! I wanted to be there for him, I needed that! How the hell am I supposed to move on from losing him when I can't say I tried my best to save him? He's taken that from me!"
"Calm down." He told her gently, not telling her off, but giving her a firm command to be able to focus on. He could understand her frantic anger, he had lost enough people to know how those last moments together could really mean a lot when you were healing – or, attempting to heal, at any rate. Not always, but sometimes knowing that you were there could be a comfort.
"Don't tell me to calm down, Jack!" She exclaimed, "I've spent five hundred years watching people die to be with him! I've lost friends and family because he was there and that's all I ever wanted! He does not get to take this from me!"
She turned and rushed out of the room, more than likely heading out to where the TARDIS had last been to make a vain attempt at finding a way back on her own. Without transport none of them were going to get to the doomed planet any time soon, but at least it will make her feel like she was doing something.
He headed out, trying to ignore Clara's rather clingy relative, looking for the young woman had always seemed to know his daughter so well. She found her in the hallway, the front door slamming shut as Danni stormed out. He held out his hand for his phone while she continued to try and contact River on her own.
"I don't think this is going to happen." She told Jack, "Even if we happen to ring her on the right number, and we manage to get her when she's not busy, we still can't guarantee that she'll even answer! Danni's told me what she's like, if it's not Danni calling her, she's not going to care."
Jack nodded, "I'm going to have to go to UNIT." He told her, "I made sure that if they got their grimy hands on my manipulator I would still have full access to it. I'm going to head to the Black Archive, keep an eye on her while I'm gone."
"Wait, you know about the Black Archive?" Clara exclaimed, surprised as she followed him to the door out of her flat, "No one is supposed to know about it. Even I'm not!"
Jack smirked at her, "I've got a few fingers in a few pies." He told her with his tone laced in innuendo, "I won't be long, don't leave her out there too long."
"You think this is the first time I've cleaned up after his messes." Clara replied, "Just hurry up, Lord only knows what he's done while he's on his own."
~0~0~0~
Clara didn't leave her outside for too long. In between calling River and hoping for an answer, she played hostess to her wonderful grandma and father. Although she quickly got sick of her Aunt telling her off for letting Jack go without getting a date for her. It was amazing how she stopped trying to set Clara up with some unknown dates when a good looking man turned up that she fancied.
Clara thought he looked better when he was a bit greyer, but then again she had always been a fan of older men.
She grabbed a cracker on her way out, trying to desperately find things to cheer her up with, if only for a moment. It hurt them all to see her so devastated, but she could only imagine how devastated she was feeling. She could remember exactly how her dad had been when her mum was dying and no one could stop it, how she knew he was hiding so much behind his eyes because he didn't want anyone to see just how sad he was. Danni was probably hiding just as much as he had, and she was so much more outwardly distraught.
"Danni?" She called as she approached Danni, who was stood on the street corner just where the Doctor had left them. There didn't seem to be too many people about, but she guessed that they had Christmas Day to thank for that.
Danni turned around at the sound of her name, but the defeated look on her face didn't change. Clara tried to give her a warm smile, hoping she didn't look too patronising as she fell by her side. They stood in silence for a moment before she twisted slightly to look at her.
"You took seeing Jack very well." She commented, "I know you were getting on with him better, but you called him dad and everything. I wasn't expecting that." Danni shrugged.
"It's…" She started, pausing for a moment to get her thoughts together, and she'd had a lot of time to think about it over the last five hundred years, "It's been almost six hundred years since I saw my mum and dad. I can't even picture them anymore, I lost that a long time ago. My dad used to wear sweater vests, and my mum was larger than life in a lot of ways, but I'm not sure if I saw them I'd even recognise them. There's only so much a brain can hold, you know?"
"Do you still miss them?" Clara asked and Danni nodded.
"I don't think I'll ever stop." She replied, "I love them as much as I always did, but I'm never seeing them again. Whether or not they know I'm still alive, or if they even remember me, or whatever is never something I'm going to find out. To me, they're dead, and they were the moment I put the manipulator on in…" She frowned for a moment, "Oh, what was her name?" She whispered to herself before shaking her head. She couldn't remember the girls name. They had been best friends once, that was a shame, "The point is, I've watched so many people die over the years, Jack is still there. He always will be, and maybe I need that."
Clara nodded, she could understand that, "I think that's very grown up of you." She commented, "I'm not sure if I like you behaving like that." Danni chuckled and they fell back into silence again. Clara's fingers flexed slightly as she wondered if she should take Danni's hand when she felt the phone she was still gripping.
"Oh! I managed to get through to River's answerphone." Clara told the blonde, "I left her a message telling her what had happened, she should ring back soon." Her heart broke slightly at the smile the blonde tried to give her before turning back to the empty spot where the TARDIS should have been. Clara wrapped an arm around her waist, pulling her close for a hug she knew Danni needed.
"If he was okay, he'd be back by now." She told Clara sorrowfully, "He would have kept trying until he got the right time. He wouldn't be late for me, not again."
"He would try and not be late for you," Clara corrected, "but you know what his driving is like. You don't know when he might turn up. He won't have left you behind, Danni."
"He would if it meant I was safe." Danni replied bluntly, "He always would, before his hearts could beat he'd send me away. He's always been protective of me."
Clara couldn't disagree there, and the Doctor she knew and the Doctor she still saw in flashes would drop her off it meant she was safe without a second thought, "He's too selfish for that." She offered as another reason, "He wouldn't be able to survive for long without you there, and he'll cave and come back for you. It's just a waiting game."
Danni nodded with a sigh – that was true, whenever he had come back from a particularly long time away from their little home, he could never leave her side for too long. And she had loved it, because she had spent every moment of every day waiting and worrying for him. Much like she was doing now, it all felt a bit much of a muchness, really. Except that it felt so final as well, and she had always been so sure that he was coming back for her, why would this be any different unless it was?
She opened her mouth, about to suggest that they head back inside when the wind picked up around them, the whooshing sound that joined the most beautiful engines she had ever heard filled the air. In front of them the TARDIS slowly came back into view and her hearts soared in absolute joy.
"Doctor!" She cried happily, pushing Clara off her and grabbing the door, throwing it open and running inside to the console. He had really come back for her, hadn't he? She was always so pessimistic, she really needed to look on the bright side more…
"Tash?" She whimpered, falling to a stop by the console at the sight of the part woman part Dalek who was at the controls. Clara came in after her, also spotting her and, out of reflex, reached out to Danni.
"You can fly the TARDIS?" She asked, surprised.
"Where's my husband?" Danni asked lowly before Tasha could reply. The woman just shot her a look, flipping a few switches and sending them back into flight, "Answer me!" Danni screamed, "Where is my husband?"
"Where he always is." Tasha replied calmly, "Waiting for you."
~0~0~0~
Danni looked around in horror at the battle field that they landed in. Houses she knew, buildings she had been in a hundred times before burnt on the snowy ground around them. People she didn't recognise rushed passed them, armed and ready to fight off the attack that was decimating the little town. How had it gotten so bad? How had they even managed to fight their way in? The force field should have kept them out, surely? And if not that, then the Doctor. The Doctor wouldn't have let this happen, unless he was powerless to stop it.
Without waiting for any word from Tasha or Clara, Danni rushed down the road towards the chapel in the middle of the town, the bell tower one of the only things left standing. She shoved people out of the way, ignored the cries of people in need of help, and burst through those double doors and into her home.
The living room was in ruins, drawings scattered across the floor, torn off the walls and discarded like they didn't mean anything at all. Furniture was broken, chairs smashed and ornaments in pieces, but they had been there a while. A layer of dust seemed to cover everything; nothing had obviously been disturbed in a long time. She stepped over everything, making her way to the back of the room, where she could see him. An old man, balding with white hair, whittling away at his stupid children's toys that he had started to make. He left the shavings everywhere, it had been a nightmare to clean up.
"Steven?" He called out in a croaky, aged voice that had her shaking on the spot. That wasn't the sound of a healthy man, that was the voice of a dying man.
"No, Danni." She whimpered in reply. His hand stopped it's movement, the other gripping the toy tightly. He hung his head, then tapped his forehead with his hand, like he was giving it a good smack but didn't have the energy to do more than a few gentle hits.
"No, you don't get to do this again." He grumbled, "Stupid brain, not again. Not today. I need you on top form today." Danni took a few steps closer to him, but he turned in his chair, openly glaring at her and she paused.
"No." He growled, "I need to think, I can't have you appearing and making me feel guilty again. She is not here. She never will be. Go away." He turned back to his toy and Danni stared at him, eyes swimming in tears. He didn't think she was even real. He thought he'd made her up, that he was seeing her, for what seemed to be just one of many times. He'd truly given up on her, hadn't he? How long had he been on his own?
She strode forward, not quite knowing where she found the strength to not break down and cry, and knelt in front of him on the cold floor. He stubbornly refused to look up from the little wooden horse in his hands, so she placed both of her hands on his face, forcing him to look at her. His eyes widened slightly in shock, he obviously hadn't been expecting her to touch him at all.
"It's me, Theta." She whispered tearfully, "It's really me, I promise." She leant forward, pressing their foreheads together and for a moment let him feel in his mind just how real she was. How much she loved him, sharing memories and emotions in just a flash. In return she felt his age, felt how broken his hearts were, how much he was terrified to believe it was really her.
One of his hands, wrinkled from old age, reached up to cup her cheek, "Danielle?" He whispered, amazed and she nodded, unable to swallow the lump that had appeared in her throat.
"What have you done?" She asked in reply.
~0~0~0~
One day had turned into a year, and a year into a decade. What had been a quick-fire decision on the Doctor's part had slowly become his death sentence and now it was too late. The battles never stopped, in fact as time progressed they just grew worse and worse. People died every time now, not just on rare, unfortunate occasions. Babies grew up without fathers, some didn't even make it to be born in the first place. The whole town was slowly crumbling around him, and no matter how hard he tried, he just couldn't go back for her. His wife, his Danielle, who he could see clear as day and barely at all, was going to be waiting and devastated, but he could never bring her back to this hellhole.
He slammed the front door closed with more anger than was necessary, chucking his walking stick across the floor towards the fire. Another long struggle of a fight, another death that he could add to his toll.
"You know, if you just go back for me, none of this would be happening?" Danni called from the sofa, leaning back with one leg crossed over the other, "That's what this is, you know? You're tired because you miss me."
"Shut up." He snapped, walking past and waving a hand through the hallucination, partly to make it go away, partly in hope that she would be sat there instead.
He never had such good luck, "You know I'm waiting for you." She continued, "Crying, most likely. Heartbroken because you promised to never leave me behind again."
"You're safer there!" He snapped, "I'm changing history, isn't that what everyone tells me I should do?"
"No, they tell you to look after your wife better." She retorted in a smug tone, "But you never listen, do you? You're so convinced you're doing to right thing that you never once stopped to ask me, did you? Oh no, not the big bad Time Lord. He always knows best."
He turned, jabbing a finger in her direction, "You know, I've had just about enough of you." He snapped.
"I'm your head." She pointed out, "If you had just asked me…"
"I couldn't ask you." He interrupted.
"And why not?" She challenged.
"Because you would have never stayed behind!" He shouted in reply, "You'd be dead and buried amongst the rest. Maybe not now, maybe not until long after I'm gone, but you would have died here and I can't let that happen!"
"Then why do you keep seeing me?" She challenged, standing up, "If you're so convinced that you're in the right, why am I here?"
"Because I miss you." He replied weakly, tiredly. He was so sick and tired of having the same conversation again and again with himself. He missed her more than he missed anything. It hurt, clawed at his soul every time he woke up and she wasn't in bed. When she didn't greet him when he walked through the door he could feel another piece of himself falling away. She was the best thing in the universe, and he couldn't ever have her again.
"Then go get me." She snapped, "Get your stupid old man arse in that TARDIS and come and get me!"
He squeezed his eyes shut, because that was the whole point, really, wasn't it? He couldn't go get her because he was an old man. Because she was young and beautiful, and she'd get over him, but he didn't want her to remember him like that. He wanted her to remember him as she deserved. Running and laughing and holding her close as she cried his name. This wasn't what he needed her to see when someone said his name. It was incredibly selfish, and was tearing him apart, but he was sticking to it.
He took a deep breath and opened his eyes to find her nowhere to be seen. All he saw all around him were reminders of her. How much pride she took in keeping their living room tidy, how happy she was when she got another picture to add to their never-ending collection. She'd learnt to actually cook here, she'd had friends here. Every piece of furniture had meant something to her, but all he could see was how they were there but Danielle wasn't.
It was with a growl of pure grief that he ripped down the drawings closest to him, and once he'd started he couldn't stop. He very quickly destroyed the room, crying out in anger and heartache and loss as he tore up everything that had made her happy, just because he couldn't stand to know how sad she would be. He'd destroyed everything else, why should the room be any different?
People would come in over the next two centuries, asking if he wanted them to tidy up for him. They only meant it in good will, a good deed for the lovely old man who looked after them all. But they stopped asking, almost terrified of the snarl that would appear on his face and the way he'd shout at them until they left. No one was to touch it. The room was just the way it should be – completely decimated.
~0~0~0~
Clara had tried to give them as much time as she could, hovering outside as Dalek fire filled the air, the sound of people screaming and fighting for their lives until she just couldn't stand it anymore. She barely noticed the room, her eyes immediately drawn to the old man cuddling her best friend on his lap, holding her tighter than her own dad had held her mum when she had been dying. She could see the strain on his muscles, the way his shoulders shook under the effort, but there was no way he was letting her go.
"I'm sorry, never again." His voice reached her ears and Clara couldn't help but smile through her tears at the way he was trying to comfort her. He looked so old, so much older than he had when they had last seen him. For the first time she suddenly realised they were right and he was going to die. She'd just walked in on their final moments together, bathed as they were in the light of the crack in the wall they were sat by.
Danni lifted her head slightly at the sound of the door closing behind her and met the other woman's gaze. Clara looked devastated, and she didn't blame her. Her grip tightened slightly on her husband. All that time they had lost, gone in an instant for her and over a lifetime for him, and it was very swiftly running out. He'd told her minutes, that soon he was going to have to go outside to that awful noise of Dalek battle cries, and she couldn't even begin to think of how she would be able to let him go. She couldn't and he'd been promising her ever since that he'd never leave her behind again.
"Doctor?" She whispered gently, rubbing her eyes to try and stop them stinging, "We've got company."
He looked around and smiled at the sight of their old companion. He should have known she would have been the reason Danielle was with him once again. Clara Oswald had been fixing things for them for hundreds of years, and he knew that she would be looking after his wife long after he was gone. He knew he had reason to worry about Clara, she made a much better husband than he ever had, and now he would never be able to fix that.
"You two are always being all gross around me." Clara declared, walking slowly over before crouching on the floor. She placed hand on his where it sat on Danni's arm and he shot her a weak smile in reply.
"Is that a cracker?" He asked in reply and she looked down at her other hand. She'd almost forgotten she was carrying it.
"I guess it is." She replied, turning on the spot and holding one end out to him, "Merry Christmas, Doctor." She told him quietly. He tugged at it weakly, unable to pull it. Danni saw his slightly humiliated look and wrapped her hands around his, helping him pull it. With quite a pathetic crack it burst apart. Clara held the other end, settling back down on the floor.
"Is there a joke?" He asked her and she reached inside, pulling out the paper hat. She quickly discarded it, pulling out the piece of paper inside and she could have laughed. That was her bloody Aunt through and through, they all needed a joke, and all they got was a stupid poem.
"Extract from 'Thoughts On A Clock' by Eric Ritchie Jr." She read from the top. The Doctor settled back, wrapping his arms back around his wife and holding her as close as he could. He had no energy to pull a cracker, but he needed to know he could still keep her close. All that time alone, fighting for Christmas and his home planet, and all he'd wanted was to cuddle her like he used to.
"Is it a knock-knock one?" He asked, looking down at the blonde in his arms, "Those are best."
"I don't think so." Clara replied apologetically but the Doctor shrugged.
"Well, read it. Go on."
"'And now it's time for one last bow, like all your other selves. Eleven's hour is over now, the clock is striking twelve's.'" The Doctor's head snapped down to look at the top of Clara's head. His mind wasn't what it once was, he forgot a lot of things and he knew he used to have a Cyberman head around here somewhere, but some things were as clear as the day it happened.
When the clock strikes twelve, Doctor, that's when she'll leave you, and it'll be completely her choice.
River's words had really scared him. He was always giving Danni reasons to be mad at him, he had always been able to see her leaving him. Maybe at the stroke of midnight after he'd hurt her one too many times. And yet, there she was, in his arms for his final day. At least he was able to rub that in the stupid archaeologists face. He didn't deserve her as a wife, but she never deserved to have her as a daughter.
Her quiet weeping brought him back into the room and he placed a kiss on her blonde hair, smiling sadly to himself that he remembered her exactly and nothing like her at all, "It'll be okay." He promised her gently, "Please don't cry my Danni-Girl."
"How am I supposed to ever stop?" She whimpered and he chuckled lowly. He couldn't stop her hurting later, but he wanted to know he at least tried to make her smile before he left her. He wanted to remember her laugh, her beautiful smile. He wanted that memory of her happy with him as he fell.
"Well, Clara will have to learn some better jokes." He replied with a hint of cheek and Clara tilted her head to shoot him a look.
"Doctor! The Doctor will be brought!" The joint Dalek voice called yet again and she curled up into his lap, whimpering, terrified and he shushed her gently.
"They're only Daleks." He told her, "Nothing for you to worry about."
"The Daleks demand the Doctor!"
The door opened for a third time and a young man rushed in, panting heavily and looking slightly taken aback at the sight in front of him. However, he didn't let it deter him for long, "They're here. The Daleks, we can't stop them. They want you."
"Oh, all right, Steven." The Doctor snapped before frowning slightly in confusion, "Are you Steven?"
"No, Doctor." The man replied with a shake of his head.
"It's OK, Steven," He replied anyway and Danni snuggled into him, squeezing her eyes shut. He had always been terrible with names. That was nothing new, it didn't mean anything. It was nothing new, "don't worry." He tapped his nose, "I have got a plan. Off you pop."
The young man turned to Clara, as if looking for support. She just nodded with a sad smile and he rushed out again.
The Doctor turned back to Danni, nudging her with his face to make her look at him. He smiled and placed a gentle kiss on her lips, feeling his hearts exploding painfully. He should have held her more. He should have loved her more, "Do you think you can stand up for me, Danni-Girl?" He asked gently, "My leg's not what it used to be." She nodded with a sniff, getting up but keeping a hand on his arm.
She knew what was coming. He was going to go outside, wasn't he? He was going to give himself up to the Daleks, and the war was going to end with his death. A fixed point, one they had always known was coming – On Trenzalore, at the fall of the Eleventh. It came too soon. Everything always ended, and she shook as he grabbed his cane and slowly stood up.
"Doctor, what are you going to do?" Clara asked nervously, worried about the answer. She knew the Doctor never had a plan, and if he did, if by some miracle he did, he wouldn't look so resigned.
"Oh, I don't know." He replied, taking his wife's hand, squeezing it in the hope she could take some comfort from him, "Talk very fast, hope something good happens, take the credit. That's generally how it works." He brought her palm up to his lips, twisting her hand so he could place a kiss on the inside. It had always been much more intimate that just a normal kiss on her hand but she still whimpered brokenly.
His plan had been to keep hold of her hand until he had to let go, going gladly if he knew that he had held her until the last moment. However, she followed, her grip vice-like and it was very clear that she had no intention of ever letting him go. He paused for a moment, steeling himself, before turning around, "You have to stay here." He told her and she shook her head.
"No, no I have to be there." She insisted through her tears, "Please, I can't let you die on your own. Please, Theta." He removed his hand from hers and placed it on her cheek, shooting her the biggest smile he could muster.
Her face was bright red, tears continuing down it, a bit of a snotty nose. She could barely breathe, but his smile didn't abate, "You were always the most beautiful thing I had ever seen." He told her honestly, "I need to know that you're not going to remember me like that. When you're happy and running-"
"I can't-" She started but he shook his head, cutting her off.
"When you're happy and running, I need you to remember me like that too. Can you do that for me, Danni?" She knew she couldn't, but she nodded all the same and he reached forward, placing a kiss on her forehead, "Now, give me that smile of yours, eh? Can you give me that?" She tried. She tried to let the happiness of seeing him again take over, but all she could think about was how this was it. How she was never going to see him again. How the rest of her life was going to be spent without him by her side. How scared she was that she was going to live past the grief and slowly forget him, forget how he felt, how he smelt. How he couldn't bake, or polish. How he made her laugh, or cry, or tell him off for being so damn childish. The smile quickly fell away to deep sobs that ripped through her, shaking her and he pulled her in for what was going to be their last hug.
"Hey, my Danni-Girl, don't be sad." He commanded lightly, "It's okay, it's okay, and do you know why?" She shook her head into his shoulder, "Because. Because for a while, I loved Danielle Fielding and she loved me." He felt her tense, felt her recognise his words and he pulled back, meeting her surprised and broken brown eyes with his own shining ones, "Hey, guess what?" He asked cheekily, "Gotcha."
The bubble of laughter that broke from her took her completely by surprise, but it was all he needed. His Danni-Girl, happy and laughing. He'd take that memory to his grave.
Before she had a chance to think otherwise, he was up the stairs and gone, leaving her stood in the middle of the room to deal with the realisation of the fact that that moment had been the last time she was ever going to see him alive.
She turned to look at Clara, looking completely at a loss of what to do, her whole body shaking under the sudden and unadulterated despair. Clara rushed over, managing to catch her as she fell, holding her and crying with her as she wailed.
Clara couldn't stand it, not for a moment. If her heart was breaking at the sound of Danni coming completely undone in her arms, Lord only knew what the Doctor was feeling like at the sound of his wife crying and not being able to do anything about it. She couldn't just sit back, she had to at least try and make this better for them all.
Her eyes caught the light of the crack, the thing that had brought them here in the first place, the cause of all of their distress. She picked Danni off the floor and walked her over, shushing her gently before helping her sit by it.
"Listen to me, you lot, listen! Help him. Help him change the future. Do it. Do something." She commanded the Time Lords behind it. Danni looked up at her, eyes swimming in despair and confusion before she seemed to grasp what Clara was doing. She turned to the crack herself.
"It's all your fault." She told the crack and the people she knew where listening to behind it, "He's been here eight hundred years protecting you from destruction, despite the horrors you put him through. And that's down to the goodness in his hearts, because he's better than the rest of you combined." She turned, pressing her hand on the edges of the crack, "You've been asking his name, and I can tell you it, but you save him. Do you understand? You save the Doctor, and I will give you anything you want. I will do whatever you want. Just save my husband!" With that she leant forward, pressing her forehead against the wall just above it. She began repeating his name again and again in her mind, projecting it loudly, her last chance, the last thing she had to give.
She jolted back from the wall as the crack snapped shut with a slap of concrete on concrete, disappearing off the wall. Had they… She looked at Clara, who looked just as surprised as she did.
"Did it work?" Clara asked her and Danni shrugged, running over and grabbing her hand tightly.
"Let's hope." She replied, "Come on, we can't go up, but we can go out!" Clara nodded and the two rushed outside. There was already a crowd of people gathered around the outside of the chapel, looking up at the top, where the Doctor was stood. Above them, filling half the sky, was a Dalek ship, shining a light down on her husband
"You are dying, Doctor." They called out and Danni clung to Clara's arm with both hands. Hopefully, just hopefully…
"Yes... I'm dying." The Doctor's voice snapped in reply, "You've been trying to kill me for centuries, and here I am, dying of old age. If you want something done, do it yourself." She couldn't help but giggle, even as he stood waiting to be executed, he had to get the last word in.
"You will die, and the Time Lords will never return."
"You still can't work up the courage to shoot me, can you?" He snapped in reply. "You're still worried I've got something up my sleeve." His sigh echoed across the land and Danni sagged. The Time Lords had just run away, hadn't they? After everything, they still wouldn't interfere. She should have known better than to get her hopes up, "Well, you knock yourselves out, boys. I've got nothing this time."
The fire onto the town started once again, Daleks flying down and shooting at random, not aiming for people, but for where the Time Lords could possibly be hidden. It may be the end of the war, but the Doctor had kept their exact whereabouts hidden from pretty much every foe for the eight hundred years he'd been there.
Danni's eyes widened, her breath caught and both of her hearts stopped as, in the black sky above, a giant gold crack appeared. It opened up and golden light streamed out, heading straight for the Doctor. She couldn't even laugh in triumph, suddenly the explosions behind her meant nothing. They had come through!
"What was that?" Clara asked, looking at her for answers and seeing the look of pure elation on her face, "Danni, what was it?"
"I think it was regeneration energy." She replied softly, "I think, I think, they gave him regeneration energy."
"What does that mean?" Clara asked.
"You will die now, Doctor. This is the end of you. The rules of regeneration are known. You have expended all your lives." The Daleks taunted.
"Sorry, what did you say?" The Doctor called back, a confidence in his voice that hadn't been there a moment ago, "Did you mention the rules? Now, listen! Bit of advice. Tell me the truth if you think you know it. Lay down the law, if you're feeling brave, but, Daleks, never, ever tell me the rules!"
"Emergency! Emergency! The Doctor is regenerating! The Doctor is regenerating!"The Daleks called and Danni cheered, bouncing up and down on the spot. Her hearts were racing, the back of her mind very much aware that he was still dying, but as the clock stuck twelve, her husband was going to live.
"Oh, look at this. Regeneration number 13. We're breaking some serious science here, boys. I tell you what, it's going to be a whopper!" He called, "Did you hear that, Danni-Girl? Get the tea cooking, I'm coming home!"
"Exterminate! Exterminate the Doctor." The Daleks cried, each of the robots attacking the town turning and heading to attack the Doctor.
"You think you can stop me now, Daleks?" The Doctor laughed, "If you want my life... Come... and get it!" The town cried out as a shot of pure energy exploded from where the Doctor was stood, exploding a Dalek as it shot straight past it.
"Get everyone inside!" Danni told Clara over the roar, "Into the chapel. Quickly."
"What about you?" Clara asked.
"I'll be there in a minute." She promised, not tearing her eyes away from the spectacle in front of her, "Now, Clara!" She shouted and Clara nodded, turning to the townsfolk.
"Get inside! Get off street, get inside, quick. Quick!" She told them all, ushering them off the street and towards the chapel, "You heard her, quickly!"
Danni didn't leave until the last moment, when it became very clear that she was in danger if she stood there a second longer. She just needed to see him, or at least see the evidence of her Theta living on past the point he should have died. She just needed to make sure that he really was regenerating. That she'd see him again, that everything was going to be okay, because he was there.
Until it all became too much, and she rushed inside with the rest to let him destroy the fleets and save the day.
~0~0~0~
Danni and Clara headed out of the chapel first, hand in hand when it became clear it was safe for them all to do so. The town was in ruins, burning rubble interspersed with burning Dalek remains were scattered everywhere but Danni didn't care. The moment her eyes fell on the TARDIS, she was dragging Clara towards it without a word.
The doors were closed, but the phone was hanging out of its hatch, and it was the fact that she was on the outside and he was on the inside that had Danni freeze on the spot. A whole new husband was waiting for her on the inside. A new man she to get to meet and know. The first Doctor she would ever meet that she never knew. She wasn't sure how she felt about it, because she had just been so happy that he wasn't going to die, now she was hit with the fact that he wasn't going to die. Of course she was happy, how could she not be, but what if he wasn't? What if the Doctor on the other side had been ready to die, and hated her for interfering?
Clara saw her hesitance and, after hanging the phone back up, took her hand and placed it on the handle, "Go, he's waiting." She encouraged gently and Danni nodded, pushing it open. She slowly made her way inside, looking at the clothes discarded on the floor, but noticing the very large lack of Doctor in the room. She reached the console and smiled softly at the fish fingers and custard on the control top. He obviously was hungry, she didn't blame him. If she could remember more of it, she would put money on her being hungry afterwards.
The footsteps were slow, but they echoed through the room as he walked up the stairs. Her Doctor, her Theta. No new face, no new man. Just Eleven, with a pained smile on his face and his old suit. She smiled and ran over, letting him gather her up in his arms.
"Theta." She whispered and he placed a kiss on her hair, squeezing his eyes shut for a moment, hoping to ignore the pain and enjoy her there. He was going to be changing soon, but he had held out as long as he could for her. He needed to make sure she was okay, that she knew just how much he needed her, and just how sorry he was.
Danni pulled back and cupped his face with both her hands, marvelling over how beautiful he was. Young, old, it didn't matter. He always had been beautiful to her, and he was back. They could fix everything from here, she'd forgive him and they'd move on.
And then she saw the sparkle of gold in his eye and it hit her in the chest. They weren't getting a second chance; he might not have died, but it was still the fall of the Eleventh.
He smiled softly and placed another kiss on her forehead, neither of them said a word.
"You're young again." Clara spoke up, breaking the silence and he looked over at their friend, "You're OK. You didn't even change your face."
"Ha!" He laughed softly, "It's started. I can't stop it now. This is just the reset." He took Danni's hand and walked her over to Clara, picking up Clara's hand and placing it in it. He needed Danni to be looked after, he knew this wasn't going to go well, she needed her friend, "Whole new regeneration cycle, taking a bit longer. Just breaking it in." He turned back to the console, wobbling as he shook with the effort of holding it off.
"It may seem like we disappear," he started, talking to his wife as he flew them away from Christmas, "Everything you are, gone in a moment, like breath on a mirror. But any moment now, he's a-coming."
"Who's coming?" Clara asked, automatically wrapping Danni up in her arms.
He shot them both a secret, pained smile, "The Doctor." He whispered in reply.
"But you are the Doctor!" Danni insisted, trying not to cry yet again and failing miserably, "You're my Doctor."
"Yep..." He agreed, "I'm your Doctor, and I always will be." He held up his hands in front of him, watching them glow with the promise of a new man destroying him. A new man who was going to walk away with his wife, who would do better. He knew it, he could feel it, he'd ensure it. He was going to do better, "But times change... and so must I." He turned back to Danni, seeing the devastation in her features, wanting to hold her but knowing it was just too dangerous, "I'm sorry, my Danielle. Never again. I won't lie to you again, I swear."
"You never lied to me." She replied, her voice almost disappearing as she held back her sobs, "You just loved me."
"I do." He promised, "I love you, Danielle." He fell against the console, propping himself up. Everything hurt, his whole body was burning and dying at the same time, but he was doing his best to hold on. His Danielle, his wife, she looked so scared, he needed to reassure her while he can. He didn't have long left, he could feel the seconds ticking down, but she needed him, she needed this him.
And then he heard the giggles. The giggles of a woman he'd not seen in over nine hundred years. He turned to the stairs to see her standing there, smiling at him like her universe was complete. His Danni-Girl, with gorgeous red hair and her favourite blue dress. She was a vision, absolutely perfect, and for a moment he let himself fall into the illusion that she was actually there, that everything was still perfect for them, that nothing went wrong. He never killed her, he never left her behind, they had just lived happily and together for the rest of his days.
She slowly walked towards him, eyes only for him and he couldn't look anywhere else but at her. His Danielle, his Danni-Girl, before he'd hurt her, before he had twisted and turned their lives and started to worry too much about her. She was strong, she had survived so much as the red-head who came to a slow stop in front of him, he was only starting to realise what a mistake he'd make thinking that the blonde across the room couldn't survive anything else.
He watched her tilt her head, her luscious hair shining in the dull light, her smile shining and her grey-blue eyes as beautiful as he remembered. She held out her hand to him, "Come along, Spaceman." She coaxed in her angelic voice, "I'm waiting."
Danni watched him reach out into thin air, like he was trying to take hold of someone's hand that wasn't there, "T-Theta?" She stuttered out and his head dropped, a sad smile on his face, like she'd interrupted something. He turned, finally meeting her eyes, brown and shining with her tears.
"You are my Danni-Girl." He told her firmly, desperate for her to believe him, "That never changed. You were, and always will be, my Danni-Girl." She beamed her beautiful smile, just for him. It mixed with the sadness, her heartache but there was nothing as beautiful in the universe as her, and he knew that from experience. He tried to return it through his own pain. Almost there...
"Always." She barely whispered, promising him the best she could. His hearts soared for the last time as he reached up, taking his bow tie off. Her smile fell, her sobs starting up as Clara held onto her tightly, making sure she didn't run too close to the regenerating Time Lord.
"Please, Theta, don't." She begged, "Please don't die. Please."
"Danni, I love you." He promised and her knees gave way, Clara crying out as she struggled to hold her up.
"Don't leave me." She begged, "Not now, please!"
"We all change... when you think about it." He told her, knowing she understood what was happening, and that she'd be okay. But he remembered her dying well, he remembered her being there one moment and a new woman being there the next, and he knew that she wasn't rejecting the new him. She was just mourning the man he was now, "We're all different people all through our lives. And that's OK, that's good, you've got to keep moving, so long as you remember all the people that you used to be. I will not forget one line of this. Not one day. I swear. I will always remember when the Doctor was me."
Danni couldn't hold back, she couldn't just let him go without a final hug, without a final goodbye. She needed to show him what he meant to her before it was too late, so as hard as she could, she shoved Clara off her. The brunette cried out as she hit the floor and Danni was running towards him. Towards his brown hair and his green eyes.
He exploded, gold light for just a moment as he bent backwards. And he was gone. Eleven was gone, and a new man stood in his place. Danni stared at him in shock, at his older face and grey hair. At… they were impressive eyebrows. He walked towards her, studying her closely, eyes piercing into her and she couldn't help the step back from the new man who had appeared in her Theta's place.
He cried out, grabbing his stomach as he was shaken by the aftershocks of his regeneration, falling against the console. Her shock, her sadness, everything fell away at the sight of him in pain and she as by his side, trying to help him stand up straight.
"Kidneys!" He cried, which were probably some terrible first words, "I've got new kidneys." He frowned, "I don't like the colour."
"Well…" Danni drawled slowly, looking to the just-as-shocked Clara for support, "You're not the one who has to look at them?" She offered. He frowned, studying her like he was trying to work out who she was. That was okay, though. Apparently she didn't remember him when she regenerated, either.
"You!" He exclaimed, it obviously coming to him and she smiled shakily at him, "You're the one I don't like!"