I sat quietly in the top corner of the classroom, eyes cast down. My hands gripped my notebook tightly, trying to steady the anxious rhythm of my heart. It was really hard for me to sit straight because of the pain. I got at least 4 hits on the back and 5 on my chest and stomach. The first class of the university hadn't started yet, and I already felt on edge. It was 9:30 AM, and slowly, everyone began to filter into the room. I pulled up my mask and checked my phone. Where the hell is Sunghoon? Did he oversleep?
I shot him a text: "Where are you?"
Five minutes passed before I got a reply. "Parking my cycle. Be there in three."
Just as I put my phone away, Jinwoo swaggered into the room. The second our eyes met, he shot me a look—sharp, cold, dismissive. I could almost hear him saying, "Piss off."
Why anyway? Nothing really happened between us yet in this timeline. We just met yesterday at the infirmary.
But I ignored it, like always. It wasn't worth the energy. But when I saw him glance over at and walk to where Aera was sitting, at the front, I noticed something. She rolled her eyes as if she was annoyed. I didn't expect that. I was so sure that something happened between these two. But I had so much bigger on my plate now.
I knew my plan to quit skateboarding wasn't going to work if I kept lingering on keeping my mouth shut. It was really hard for me. It pained me even to think of quitting it. Skateboarding had been the only thing that kept me alive after my brother died and then my whole family. And Sunghoon was the person who supported me all the way. Sunghoon was a professional cyclist before he got to know me. He was one of the youngest Koreans in history to make it to the national level. But to be with me he gave up cycling and started focusing on Skateboarding. Thankfully he enjoyed it too much to make it as one of his paths. We two joined some local event together. And I was scouted by the National Skateboarding Association when I was in first year in highschool. I made it to an event's final round and was given a chance to participate in the Olympics if I win. That was when I lost track of everything and my whole world went upside down, ever since her death.
What did she mean by saying that I have to protect my people before time runs out?
This all seems like stupid joke. Who will believe some childlike story like this?
My head is on the verge of bursting with these endless thoughts. Is there really no one who can help me?
Why am I again put on some fate tests again? Haven't I already gone through enough? Can this really be called 'a given chance'?
Why did she even send me here? At this time? Not before this?
Since when did everything start going against me? Since the moment my brother died?
Only if I received my brother's phone that day, he could be alive, and my mother wouldn't have taken such a decision, and father wouldn't turn into an alcoholic and ruin his health, and die. Only if I were strong enough to fight back, that person wouldn't have died that day. Only if I told Sunghoon to follow his dream, rather than mine, he wouldn't lose his ability to walk that day. How many deaths have I caused?
I shouldn't think of these now. I keep reminding myself as I sit in the class. I can't let myself have another episode like last night. I hide my face between my palms and start breathing. Someone! Please someone come and knock me out of it! Please!
Suddenly, I felt a hand on my shoulder. I took a deep breath and slowly looked up. Aera was standing there, Sunghoon right behind her.
"Bohyun, are you okay?" Aera's voice was soft. I glanced at the front of the classroom. The teacher hadn't arrived yet, but I could feel the weight of everyone's stares on me.
Sunghoon knew exactly what was going on. He had been through every storm with me, witnessing every moment I fell apart. Without a word, he reached into his bag and pulled out a small bottle of pills which he always had for me. "Take these," he said.
My own hands trembled as I took the pills from him, slipping my mask down to swallow them. Aera slid into the desk in front of me, blocking the view from the rest of the class. I knew why she did it—so no one could see the bruises and scars that marred my face.
Sunghoon's eyes darkened as he finally took a good look at me. "What the hell happened to you?" His voice was low, quiet and yet almost a growl.
"Don't bother," I muttered, my voice barely audible.
Aera chimed in, "I asked him this morning too. He ignored me."
"Seriously? What happened?"
"Don't bother now," I uttered.
"Does it happen often?" Aera asked, looking at Sunghoon.
Sunghoon nodded and asked me again, "Did it happen last night?"
I ignored him, opening my notebook. He sighed heavily. "Alright, fine. But if you don't tell me later, I'll tell mom. And you know what'll happen then."
That was worse than any threat. But I was prepared. She'd find out later anyway because I was already planning to see her today.
Aera leaned closer, her brow furrowed in concern. "Bohyun, are you sure you're okay? You look... pale."
Again! I hold my breath as I meet her gaze. "Can you— just not get this close?" I spoke.
She shrugged, not moving an inch, "You really look terrible now that I'm watching you close."
I swallowed hard at how close she was. Someone cracked open a window, and the breeze caught her hair, sending the sweet scent of daisies drifting to my nose.
Can I really not escape from her?
I snapped, my voice harsher than I intended. "I told you not to get too involved, Aera. I'm not someone you want to hang around."
"Hold on, hold on—" Sunghoon chimed in. "What is going on?"
"Ask you friend. He has been babbling and acting tough since the morning." Aera retorted, rolling her eyes.
"What's wrong, dude? Did you get hit on the head hard? Why are you acting up over nothing?"
"I don't really have time to see someone showing concern for me—" I said, glancing between Aera and Sunghoon. "I don't like to be pitied. Does my answer satisfy you?"
She blinked, taken aback. I shut my eyes. I just hurt her feelings, didn't I? God! That's killing me.
She shouldn't get close to me at all.
She sighed, straightening up, "I don't care about that. Who's pitying you here? Seriously? I'm asking because you helped me yesterday. And besides, we're classmates. We should—"
Before she could finish, I cut her off again. "You should go back to your seat. I am not liking the way that guy, Jinwoo, is giving me the death glare."
She glanced over her shoulder at Jinwoo, then back at me, rolling her eyes. "Whatever. You should really eat more sweets, you know?"
I looked at her, confused while Sunghoon snorted.
"So that you can talk sweetly," she added. "Put your mask back on before you scare everyone."
She didn't just say that.
"Tell that guy the same thing. He looks even worse" I muttered, noticing for the first time that Jinwoo was sporting a number of plasters across his face and hands. His fierce expression was even more unsettling now.
Aera returned to her seat, and Sunghoon finally sat down next to me. He leaned in, his voice low. "Dude, what's going on?"
I sighed, not wanting to get into it. "Leave it, Sunghoon. Please."
"I'm not asking about the bruises," he said, his tone serious. "I'll leave that to mom. But what's going on with Aera and you?"
"Nothing," I replied flatly. "She's just been curious about why I look like I've been through a war zone ever since the morning."
He wiggled his eyebrows playfully. "Morning? Did you guys come here together?"
I rolled my eyes, annoyed. "Stop that. It's gross," I said. "Yeah, we met at the bus stop. She saw my face while I was eating breakfast. That's why she's been bothering me."
Sunghoon leaned back. "But what about Jinwoo? Wasn't he the one who showed up at the infirmary yesterday?"
"Yeah," I said, glancing over at Jinwoo. He was still staring at me.
"He's still glaring at you," Sunghoon remarked, glancing at Jinwoo.
Is this because we were with Aera yesterday?
As far as I remembered, he never really showed any interest even if some guys showed interest in Aera. Because he knew Aera would never leave him anyway.