"...I could maybe look into conquering this kingdom in the future."
I muttered under my breath, staring out the barred window of my cell. Below, soldiers were training with all the grace of drunken toddlers in armor. Between Great Sage's analysis and my own god-tier intuition, it didn't take long to figure out I could raze this entire place once I hit Demon Lord status.
The only reason that dwarf king was remotely useful was politics. Annoying, but necessary. If I wanted to build a successful kingdom, an alliance would be smarter than war. Probably. Probably.
Conquering the world sounds like a full-time job anyway. Maybe that's why the original Rimuru didn't even try. Too many spreadsheets.
But I'm not Rimuru. I'm me. And while Dwarfland may be safe (for now), I've got my eyes on the Eastern Empire. If war's inevitable, might as well be the one pulling the trigger first.
Now, if I could get Chloe on my side... I might even be able to match Guy Crimson.
That Prideful King Lucifer skill of his? Straight-up broken. He can copy any skill he sees—like a high-definition bootlegger of divine power. He even copied Milim's ultimate. Seeing as Dominion has the potential of becoming an ultimate skill that's active most of the time... I really don't want to meet him.
...Okay, I'm rambling.
"An alliance would be best," I concluded, nodding to myself. "Then maybe I can sweet-talk the king into helping me conquer the Eastern Empire."
Would be nice to have friends too. You know, actual equals. People who'd call me out if I went off the deep end instead of just groveling at my feet. Worship's nice—until it gets lonely. Guess I understand why Milim clung to Rimuru the way she did.
"All right," a voice interrupted my villain monologue. "You're free to go. Sorry I kept you overnight—I had to. Policy."
"Don't worry about it! Honestly, I'm thankful. Saved me hotel fees!"
And that was true. A free jail cell was still free.
Of course, my illusion magic was still barely hiding yesterday's battlefield-slash-bloodbath, so getting out before the spell broke was top priority.
"Glad you see it that way. Here—let me introduce you to a blacksmith I know. Talented guy."
"Oh, perfect. Thanks!"
Right on schedule. Finally, a hot bath! I've missed warm water cascading over me like a gentle hug from a salamander. Though… do I have Fire Resistance? Or was it Temperature Control? I forget. My memory's so bad I put my own name in my passwords just to remember them.
"In exchange for that…" the captain started.
Mmm? A catch? The only "catches" I like are on very specific kinds of websites.
"If you've got any of those recovery potions left, would you part with some?"
Oh, right. Vesta—or whoever—would definitely want to poke at them. Science reasons. Sure, have fun.
"Sure. You can have five."
"Five! That'd be wonderful!"
"Yep. Also, you can probably dilute them. Ten parts water to one part potion should still fix a paper cut."
The captain nodded like a bobblehead. I coughed up the potions (literally), and in return, he handed me a small pouch. Inside? Gold coins.
"Not much," he said, "but I'll give you five gold per potion."
"Fine by me. But…"
"Not enough? I'm doing my best here!"
"Oh, no no. It's my first time in the city. Think you could help me get around too?"
Soon enough, I was breathing in that sweet, sweet air of freedom again. But not before lunch. The captain insisted. It was decent. Not "Shuna's cooking" good—but edible. Not Shion's cooking, thank god.
"Yo! You in there?!" Captain Kaido's voice rang out.
Yep, first-name basis now. He turned out to be chill, and his older brother ran the smithy we were visiting. Classic gruff old man type, just as expected.
"Hello!"
"Pardon the intrusion," I said as we entered.
The room went silent. Dubious stares fell on me like flies on a fresh corpse.
"""Ah!!"""
The miners I saved blinked at me like I was a ghost—or worse, their overdue rent collector. Guess they were still alive and kicking.
And behind them? The boss himself. Looked like someone chiseled him from a brick wall and gave him a permanent scowl. Definitely the smith. Definitely not related to Kaido by anything except shared oxygen.
"What do you want? You know these guys?"
"Kaijin, this is it! The slime! The one who saved us—"
"Yeah! It's him!"
"..."
"Oh-ho! The slime, huh? We were just talking about you. Thanks for pulling my boys outta that mess."
Yes, yes. Praise me more. Let it flow. I'll pretend I hate it while bathing in validation.
I should tell people to stop before I get addicted and start naming statues after myself, but for now... one ego stroke won't kill anyone.
"So," Kaijin said, cocking a brow. "What brings you here today?"